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* Posts by Graham Marsden

5068 posts • joined 19 Jan 2007

Judge strikes down Apple attempt to bar Samsung's 'untrue' patent comments

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

Re: I read this as...

Personally I think the Judge should give them both a good slap upside their heads and send them to bed without any supper!

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Five-year-old discovers Xbox password bug, hacks dad's Live account

Graham Marsden
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Meh

"Kristoffer received...

"...four games for free from Microsoft in recompense, along with a year's Xbox Live subscription and $50 (about 30 quid)"

Wow, their generosity is underwhelming...

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NASA's LADEE: A Great Gig in the Sky, now on a death dive to the Dark Side of the Moon

Graham Marsden
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Coat

Dear Clangers...

... DUCK!

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Mechanical monster macropod LEAPS out of the lab

Graham Marsden
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Pint

Strewth...

... mate!

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Bay of Tweets: US sought to disrupt Cuba with covert social network

Graham Marsden
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Coat

Re: Signature Required for Delivery

"Shoot, a fella' could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff" - Major T. J. "King" Kong

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Google's Nest halts sales of its fire alarm – because waving your hand switches it off

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

Marvel at our amazing new feature for your smoke alarm...

... a Snooze button!!

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Graham Marsden
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Boffin

@R 11 - Re: Why would you make it convenient to turn off an alarm?

> Presumably you are not elderly and don't know anyone who is.

Well my grandmother was (unsurprisingly) elderly and used to keep her umbrella in the kitchen so if her smoke alarm was triggered accidentally she had a conveniently long item to hand to press the cancel button.

Perhaps you could learn something from her?

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Puking! protester! forces! Yahoo! 'techie! scum!' to! ride! vile! bile! barf! bus! to! work!

Graham Marsden
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Thumb Down

@boltar - Re: "simply market forces in action"

> money does tend to trickle down from employers to the community

Ah, sounds like the usual simplistic self-justifying, self-congratuatory, self-deluding right-wing politics in action to me.

"The peasants are getting the crumbs that drop from our tables, they should be happy with our generosity", you say, because it's easier than thinking about the people who are actually affected.

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Graham Marsden
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Thumb Down

"simply market forces in action"

Ah, aka "Fuck you, poor people, I'm alright..."

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Lego is the TOOL OF SATAN, thunders Polish priest

Graham Marsden
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Devil

"dark monsters, which can negatively affect the development of children"

And they should all learn to behave or SATAN WILL TAKE THEIR SOUL!!!!

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Amazon sets FIRE to your living room in bid to shake up TV streaming

Graham Marsden
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Coat

0.7 inch?

What's that in Linguini?

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Soccer's dull? A MIND-CONTROLLED robo-suit will be used to take first World Cup 2014 kick

Graham Marsden
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Terminator

And subsequently...

... it will become self-aware and go on a killing spree amongst the crowd...

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NSA plans to FREE YOUR DATA with range of cloud services, analytics

Graham Marsden
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Thumb Up

@Jad - Re: Serious point

Yep, that was exactly what I was thinking of when I started reading this :-)

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CERN team uses GPUs to discover if antimatter falls up, not down

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

@agricola - Re: Einstein's answer:

> Why does this question need investigating

There's this little thing called "Science" where even stuff that "everyone knows" is subject to investigation and re-evaluation because sometimes it turns out that what "everyone knows" isn't completely right.

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Graham Marsden
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Coat

And if it doesn't work...

... they can always raise money for their next project by mining Bitcoins...

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Vodafone brings African tech to Europe

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

How long...

... before we have the politicians (supported by the bankers) screaming about how this is helping to fund Islamic Paedo Terrerists and saying you can't use it for more than a tiny amount without registering your name, address, fingerprints, blood group and DNA...?

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Boeing, Cupertino to 'explore weaponisation of Apple technologies'

Graham Marsden
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Mushroom

"robotic justice from America to the world"

Many a true word is spoken in jest...

... Fuck Yeah!

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Snowden files latest: NSA and GCHQ targeted German satcomms

Graham Marsden
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Devil

@Charles Manning - Re: How long before normal companies....

> ... say stuff it, no more tax for you!

Well the Amazons and Googles and Vodafones et al of this world don't need to say that, because they already have cozy deals with the taxman...

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New Sammy patent trial: Apple seeks $40 PER 'infringing' handset

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

"There are hundreds of thousands of patents at work in mobile devices"

And how many of those are actually Original Inventive steps and not covered by Prior Art or obvious to anyone working in the industry???

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Amazon is decompiling our apps in security gaffe hunt, says dev

Graham Marsden
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Happy

Re: Good Grief

All I can say is...

Proc Pugwash

;-)

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China's CERT blames US for a THIRD of all attacks on Middle Kingdom PCs

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

Hello Mr Kettle...

... My name is Mr Pot.

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Tokyo to TXT warning of incoming Norks nukes

Graham Marsden
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Mushroom

Presumably the email also triggers some kind of audio alert.

I'd suggest the Star Trek Red Alert siren, but if someone uses that as their ringtone it could cause all sorts of panic...

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Artists install Monty Python silly walk signs in Norwegian town

Graham Marsden
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Happy

Re: Walk the walk

What about people with signs on their backs saying "How am I walking? Phone..."

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Mt Gox staff tried to warn CEO of Bitcoin loss risks – reports

Graham Marsden
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Alert

Sounds like...

... some people are trying to cover their own backsides before the court cases start...

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Say WHAT? ATVOD claims 44k Brit primary school kids look at smut online each month

Graham Marsden
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Re: Does not add up! @Eponymous Cowherd

So, as the Dutch realised a long time ago, the solution is to *EDUCATE* not to *LEGISLATE*!

Sex Education for Dutch children starts in primary school and results in much lower levels of teenage pregnancy and rape than countries such as the UK.

Of course the fact is that the Tabloids would explode with apoplexy were any UK government suggest such a thing here since teaching children about sex is obviously a Bad Thing and will only make them want to do it more...

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Michelle Obama speaks out against censorship ... in China

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

Re: @Vociferous - Fuck you all.

You missed out "If you have nothing to hide you have nothing to fear"...

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Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

@Vociferous - Re: Fuck you all.

'open access to information is “the birthright of every person on this planet”'

Especially if you are the NSA.

If you are forced to self-censor because Big Brother wants to look at everything you do, then you are still being censored and repressed, just in a different way.

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Revealed: What the US taxman really thinks of crypto-cash Bitcoin

Graham Marsden
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Re: @Nick Ryan - @ bigtimehustler Taxing Income is Immoral and counter productive.

> VAT is not on food yet

ITYM "Not on *all* food yet" :-(

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Graham Marsden
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@Nick Ryan - Re: @ bigtimehustler Taxing Income is Immoral and counter productive.

> should the goods and services that a company produces not be taxable?

Originally the idea of VAT was that it would be a "luxury" tax. Unfortunately it's now become a tax added to virtually everything and which affects everyone, rich or poor. However, as with my example above, the poor end up paying a bigger proportion of their income on VAT.

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Graham Marsden
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Boffin

@Tom 13 - Re: You are mistaking the *absolute*

Ah, the classic "I'm alright Jack" argument...

Let me put it another way. Imagine we all had to move a pile of bricks from one place to another by hand. Now imagine that I am six feet tall, well muscled, regularly go to the gym, am well fed etc whereas you are 5 feet tall, not in the best of health and poorly nourished.

Which is better: For the stronger person to carry more bricks or for him to say "No, since you can only carry two bricks, it's fair and just for me to only carry two bricks as well"? Should the burden be placed on those best capable of carrying it or distributed equally so that the stronger and the weaker carry the same amount?

(There's a certain irony that many on the Right Wing of politics are fundamentally opposed to equality, apart from when it benefits them...)

PS And I think you need to look up what a Straw Man argument is, because that other post was certainly not one.

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Graham Marsden
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Boffin

@ bigtimehustler Re: Taxing Income is Immoral and counter productive.

> "The poor do the most consuming? What? How do these poor people afford to consume more than the rich?

You are mistaking the *absolute* amount spent for the *proportional* amount spent.

To pick some simple figures, if you and I both have monthly expenses of £1500, but you earn £1500 a month and I earn £3000 a month, you are consuming 100% of your income whereas I am only consuming 50% of mine and hence have money over to save and invest.

This is why consumption taxes like VAT are neither moral nor productive, but are, instead, regressive and unfair because everyone gets taxed at the same rate, but the poorest have to pay a bigger proportion of their income and are thus left with less left over.

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Terminator-maker 'Cyberdyne Inc' lists on Tokyo stock exchange

Graham Marsden
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Alien

HAL?

It's "a maker of exoskeleton suits” so I was thinking more of the Caterpillar P-5000 Powered Work Loader that Ripley drove in Aliens.

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Research bods told: Try to ID anonymised data subjects? No more CASH for you

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

So tell me...

... how much funding will be withdrawn and how does that compare to the commercial value of the data which could be extracted...?

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Spooks vs boffins: MIT bods say they've created PRISM-proof encryption

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

Meanwhile...

... in the UK you just get threatened with jail for refusing to reveal your password on demand because obviously you are a paedoterrerist...

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Banks lob sueball at Trustwave, Target over breach

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

"Trustwave"...

... the people who use Flash to run their website...

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British trolls to face 'tougher penalties' over online abuse

Graham Marsden
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Alert

That's a good one...

... tell us another!

Parliament sees its job as passing the laws and then leaving it to the Courts to decide the actual details.

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ISPs' pirate-choking blocking measures ARE effective – music body

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

Music Industry declares...

... that laws passed to protect the Music Industry are a good start, so we need more of them.

See icon for details.

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Bulls hit city streets after alleged Samsung ad shoot hits the fan

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

"Bulls hit city streets"?

Damn, I was about to call my broker...

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Google pulls SCHAFT out of military honeypot, sprays gold at bot team

Graham Marsden
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Terminator

" this is a military research project...

"...and other uses may be found for the technology."

See icon for details, fleshy ones!

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It's 2014 and you can pwn a PC by opening a .RTF in Word, Outlook

Graham Marsden
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Trollface

Re: Microsoft Word 2003, 2007, 2010, 2013

Well isn't it good that I'm still using Word 97...

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The plot to kill Google cloud: We'll rename Windows Azure to MICROSOFT Azure

Graham Marsden
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Stop

Attempting to give a damn...

... Sorry, unable to give a damn.

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EE...K: Why can't I uninstall carrier's sticky 'Free Games' app?

Graham Marsden
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Mushroom

Re: Real-time buying behaviour

Not forgetting the idiots yakking on their mobile phones and blocking the aisles whilst ignoring the fact that people want to get past them...

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Google flu-finding service diagnosed with 'big data hubris'

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

In other words...

Garbage In, Garbage Out.

As most programers have known for decades...

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RISE of the LIVING CHAIR: Boffins recruit E coli to build futuristic materials

Graham Marsden
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"Imagine having a chair where you sit on it for a long time...

" and it remodels to support areas of stress."

Sounds like the Chairdogs from Frank Herbert's "Heretics of Dune"

"I hate it when they try to cuddle me" - Reverend Mother Odrade.

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Kim Dotcom extradition: Feds can keep evidence against Megaupload mastermind a surprise

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

@OzBob - Re: Please get rid of this f**ker for us

> can anyone think of another occurence of a german starting a political party with a specific agenda and ending holding the balance of power?

Erm, was his name Godwin...?!

> watch this fat f**ker try to buy his way out of his extradition with political favour.

You mean as opposed to US Big Media trying to buy his extradition with political influence over a foreign country's judicial system?

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ISPs failing 13m Brits on broadband speed, claims consumer group

Graham Marsden
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Re: @rhydian

This evening, having just got back from holiday, I was catching up on El Reg when Virgin Media decided to go tits up for half an hour and I kept getting messages that Firefox was unable to resolve the address.

After about 30 minutes of this I tried phoning their helpline only to get told that it might take them 5 mintues to answer my call.

Fortunately at this point it started working again, but such events are not uncommon with VM.

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Every little helps: Dirty MOLE BANDITS clean out Tesco ATM from BELOW

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

"You may have seen people acting suspiciously on Friday night, possibly covered in soil."

Well, as long as it wasn't night soil...

Icon because (oh work it out yourself!)

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NASA: Earth JUST dodged comms-killing SOLAR BLAST in 2012

Graham Marsden
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Alert

@Steve Knox - Re: Interesting Science Fiction Take on this

Better than "Inconstant Moon" by Larry Niven that I was thinking of...

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Nipper rolls up at nursery with 48 wraps of HEROIN

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

"Zero Tolerance" == "Zero Sense"

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Who DOESN'T want to play world's tallest game of Tetris – all 437ft of it

Graham Marsden
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Coat

Ok, but...

... will it have the attendant dancing figures?

(And willl pressing a button whilst they're dancing trigger a hook to drag them off? ;-) )

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