* Posts by Graham Marsden

5191 posts • joined 19 Jan 2007

Car thieves making clean getaway with GPS jammers

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

But... but...

... they *can't* do that, we've made jammers illegal! We know that banning something means that people won't do it, don't we, boys and girls?

- Government Spokesdrone.

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Twitter bomb threat joke man faces possible jail sentence

Graham Marsden
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How would I handle it...?

... Well, first tell me, did the 7/7 bombers or anyone else publically announce exactly what they were going to do before they did it?

And please, spare us the guilt trip "would you want to call the relatives?" nonsense. Would you want to tell the relatives of someone who'd been knocked down by a drunk driver? Would you want to tell someone they had cancer? Those are much more likely than a) such an attack happening again or b) those intending to carry it out telling everyone about it.

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Graham Marsden
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Boffin

Jury!

He has admitted posting the message, but that is *not* the same as pleading guilty to "sending, by means of a public electronic communications network, a message that was grossly offensive or of an indecent, obscene or menacing character".

It is up to the prosecution to *prove* that his message was "of a menacing character", which is unlikely given that the prosecutor admits he "never intended the message to be received by the airport or for them to take it seriously".

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Graham Marsden
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FAIL

Police confiscated his iPhone, laptop and home computer.

... and we can probably shortly expect "smear" charges of him being suspected of having kiddie porn/ extreme porn/ dangerous drawings as well which will serve no other purpose than an attempt to taint his name in the public consciousness in the hope that it will make people think that the authorities were right to grossly over-react...

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Apple squashes wobbly jub app

Graham Marsden
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Stop

Puritanical censorship...?

... There's an app for that!

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Swiss prostitutes armed with defibrillators

Graham Marsden
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Let's hear it for common sense.

Meanwhile, of course, sex workers in this country would probably be being prosecuted for manslaughter in a ridiculous belief that this would "send a message" to other women to "discourage them" from entering the sex trade...

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ISS gets bay window onto Earth

Graham Marsden
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But...

... when do they install the quad laser cannons...?

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Watchdog takes hard line on 'adult film xtras' ad

Graham Marsden
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Re: model agency scam

The modelling scams have been going on for many years. Mostly they involve up-front "joining" or "registration" fees, followed by "You need a portfolio, pay our in-house photographer a couple of hundred quid" etc.

Anything like this that wants a fee up front should be ignored with prejudice.

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Graham Marsden
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"paid several thousand pounds up front"

So just another version of a 419 scam.

Perhaps it could be called a 69 scam...?

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77% of domain registrations stuffed with rubbish

Graham Marsden
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Another example of ursine arboreal defecation...

... So the spammers, pill pushers, purveyors of illegal porn and so on are putting fake details in their domain registrations.

Wow, who would have thought it...

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Minister deploys 'dodgy' DNA case study

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

Even if the four cases of rape are valid...

... it does not provide a justification for retaining the DNA of *every* person arrested unless the Government is accusing us *all* of being potential rapists...

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Royal hack police worker avoids jail

Graham Marsden
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"motivated by idle curiosity."

As opposed to, say, motivated by his interest in UFOs?

One law for them...

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MPs, Lords ask if Mandybill is human rights friendly

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

"As we have explained in the past..."

"...flexibility is not an appropriate reason for defining a power which engages individual rights without adequate precision to allow for proper parliamentary scrutiny of its proportionality."

And the Government have replied "f**k you, we're going to do this anyway because we can!"

And so we get another piece of ill-thought out, ill-defined and completely vague legislation which lets the Government retroactively decide what they actually meant *after* the law has gone through Parliament, always presuming our elected representatives actually get to discuss all of it, which is unlikely because the Government is probably going to guillotine the debate to force it through before they are voted out of office...

Sorry, but we're not going to vote fascist for a third glorious decade of total law enforcement.

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MoJ and police discipline Twitter sinners

Graham Marsden
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Of course...

... what they really want to make sure is that Police Officers can't blog anonymously and criticise the management of resources and senior officers etc because that sort of thing makes them look bad...

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Holy Father turns on to Dad Rock

Graham Marsden
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So...

... the Vatican have forgiven John Lennon for saying that the Beatles were more popular than Jesus...?

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Google backpedals (again) on Buzz privacy

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

The sound you hear...

... is of Google thinking they'd better offer to bolt everyone else's stable doors after Google let all the horses out...

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Doctor Who attempted to overthrow Thatcher

Graham Marsden
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The Happiness Patrol...

... I always thought it was a take-off of the Paranoia RPG.

"Are you happy, Citizen...?"

"Yes, friend Computer, I'm wonderfully happy!!!"

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UK universities being broken by border control measures

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

"astonishingly short sighted and ill-conceived piece of unnecessary bureaucracy..."

... What *another* one...?

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Chip and PIN security busted

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

Chip and Pin always was broken...

... since it was really all about shifting liability away from the Card Companies rather than actually making transactions secure.

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Foreign objects in orifices a bigger killer than laptops

Graham Marsden
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Foreign body entering...

... you know where you can stick that...!

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US judges leave definition of obscenity to Amish, Kansas

Graham Marsden
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@Cazzo Enorme

it was MPs who first put forward the Dangerous Pictures and Dangerous Cartoons legislation. Of course since the Government then Guillotined debate on the Criminal Justice Bill and the Coroners and Justice Bill, MPs never got to debate these proposals and it was left to the Lords to do something about it.

Of course since the only people with the balls to do that are the Lib Dems and since (as a Tory Lord admitted to me) Tory Peers don't vote on Lib Dem amendments, both pieces of nonsense legislation went through virtually unchanged.

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Graham Marsden
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WTF?

So, what this really means...

... is that if anyone, anywhere in the world, publishes material on the Internet, they could liable to prosecution if they visit the USA if it violates some arbitrary "community standard" (read: prejudice of narrow minded bigots)

Of course meanwhile in the UK we only have to worry if some MP decides they don't like it...

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Aussie anti-censor attacks strafe gov websites

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

Conroy's pitch that Google censors search results in China so why not in Australia

If it's ok for the Chinese, it's ok for Australia...???

Strewth!

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Prisoners chucked off Facebook

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

"Facebook [...] if they get a notice... "

"all they have to do is not make a judgement about it, just press the delete button."

Yep, don't worry about checking the details, just do what you're told! (I bet the RIAA, MPAA, PRS and all the others would love that too...)

PS "he'd like a remote control which could mute, or delete, people", well I can think of a few people I'd like to mute or even delete too. Does that make me a suspect...?

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Govt inserts battery take-back scheme

Graham Marsden
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A good start (at last) but what about the rest of the stuff?

To get to my local recycling centre (and it *is*, as has been mentioned by others, a centre for recycling) requires a 10 mile round trip.

Consequently recycling of batteries, low-energy lightbulbs, old computer kit and much more is actually environmentally *unfriendly* unless it's possible to take an entire car-load to offset the fuel involved in getting there in the first place...

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Battlefield skyhook robocopter 'passes US Marines' test'

Graham Marsden
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Or how about...

Immediate Cargo Unmanned Supply System

or iCUSS for short when they're going "Where's the *%#& supply chopper?"

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Global gov's shrugging lets cybercrims frolic

Graham Marsden
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"Baked-in security"

As opposed to half-baked security...?

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IPS's double IT has risks, says commissioner

Graham Marsden
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"forcing passport applicants to enrol..."

... So much for "voluntary", then...

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Tories will force BT to open up ducts to rivals

Graham Marsden
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None of the other passengers looked impressed.

Well, they'd have been even less impressed if you'd forced it to run through the buffers and onto the concourse...!

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Jedi chapter seeks leader after master resigns

Graham Marsden
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"an undisclosed location"

<Waves hand>

This is not the location you're...

... oh bugger, what a give away!

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Online Kiwis maybe feeling Oz censor trickledown

Graham Marsden
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New Zealand fix...

Amongst other things I'm a Moderator on the Gamehouse Discussion forums for their version of Scrabble etc and a couple of our users have found a work-around to allow access to Gamehouse games on Facebook for users in New Zealand.

See http://forums.fb.gamehouse.com/showthread.php?t=836

NB this is not an official Gamehouse fix, caveat user! :-)

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China stomps cybercrook training outfit

Graham Marsden
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Black Helicopters

Chinese authorities have closed down a firm....

... and taken it under State control...

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Extreme pr0n suspect has his internet access suspended

Graham Marsden
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It's called "Strict Liability"

Strict liability means that mens rea ("guilty mind") does not have to be proven in relation to the actus reus ("guilty act") in order for a conviction to be obtained.

In other words the defendant has to prove that the image is *not* "grossly offensive" or "liable to cause serious injury" etc, which is virtually impossible.

Let's hear it for Tick-Box Justice...

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Graham Marsden
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Does this mean that BDSM clubs are now illegal in this country?

No, thanks to Regina vs Church 1996 after the Club Whiplash raid where the CPS tried to get a conviction for "running a disorderly house". The Judge asked the Jury "Do you think this sort of behaviour is acceptable in this day and age" and the Jury said "Yes".

The only problem is that the Operation Spanner case R vs Laskey, Jaggard, Brown et al, says that if you leave marks which are "more than trifling or transient" then you are committing an offence...

Confused? You will be...

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Iran launches rat, two turtles, some worms into space

Graham Marsden
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And in related news...

The Government are now warning that Iran may be able to launch rockets containing plague carrying rats and have raised the National Security Level to "frantic".

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MoD turns to bloggers for advice on UK defence policy

Graham Marsden
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Grenade

Pour encourager les autres...

... or, at least, it would get rid of some of the redundant Admirals, Generals and so on...

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Aussie ISP beats Hollywood on 'copyright' rap

Graham Marsden
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Bravo Judge Cowdroy!

At last someone who gets the point that just because Hollywood squinnies does NOT mean they get their own way simply because they can afford lots of expensive lawyers.

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DNA pioneer lambasts government database policy

Graham Marsden
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Good for you Sir Alec!

Of course we now have to hope that the Government will actually *listen* to the advice they're given instead of ignoring it and blithely continuing to trample all over every liberty we have...

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Carbon trade phish scam disrupts exchanges

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

"This happens to banks about once or twice a month. And this is the same sort of thing...."

So why the F**K didn't you consider that before introducing this silly scheme with great big security holes in it??

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Google behavioral ad targeter is a Smart Ass

Graham Marsden
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"a browser plug-in that kept your opt-out"

Where can we get this...!

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US plans crewless automated ghost-frigates

Graham Marsden
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Why blow it up?

All you need is a "blocking" ship to put itself in the way of the robo-ship and whilst it's trying to dodge past that, the sub slips silently away...

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Head of Stats warns politicians: 'Hands off our numbers!'

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

Who else read that title as...

... "Head of Stasi"?!

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ID minister promises virtual immortality for all Britons

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

"is the Gov't exempt from the DPA?"

What do you think...?!

# Section 28 - National security. Any processing for the purpose of safeguarding national security are exempt from all the data protection principles, as well as Part II (subject access rights), Part III (notification), Part V (enforcement), and Section 55 (Unlawful obtaining of personal data).

# Section 29 - Crime and taxation. Data processed for the prevention or detection of crime, the apprehension or prosecution of offenders, or the assessment or collection of taxes are exempt from the first data protection principle.

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Spiderman Beetleman wall-crawl glove/boot tech invented

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

"It's a fun thing to think about,"

"You can think about making a credit card-sized device that you can put in a [...] door, and break it open with very little voltage," according to Steen.

Great for when you've forgotten your keys...

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Directgov battles terrorism with report-a-website page

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

"Be a Government Informer.

"...Betray Your Family & Friends. Fabulous Prizes to be Won!"

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Security firms plot revamp to minimise false alarms

Graham Marsden
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So why not just...

... have all the employees of your Anti-Virus company download the updates first? There should be sufficient computers of various configurations and installations amongst them to pick up most of the duff update problems.

And it would give your workers a much greater incentive to ensure that these sort of glitches don't happen in the first place!

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Britain warns businesses of Chinese 'honey trap'

Graham Marsden
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"lavish hospitality and flattery,"

Mine's the one with "I am a british businessman working with senstive commercial secrets" on the back...

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Extreme Pr0n - One Year On

Graham Marsden
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"The case...

... for driving a coach and horses through some basic principles of English Law feels equally unmade."

The case was, of course, *never* made in the first place, just a "precautionary principle" argument that "well, this material might cause problems and we don't like it, so let's ban it".

Meanwhile, however, we still have a book-burning law which says "if you've got anything that might fall under this law, you'd better delete it youself, just in case we nick you for something else and we use it as an easier way to get a conviction".

As for our worst fears not being realised, you miss out the important word "Yet". It took some while for Councils etc to realise the power that the RIPA gave them, but when they did figure it out, abuse of these powers rapidly became widespread.

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Google mystery server runs 13% of active websites

Graham Marsden
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Alert

Colossus calling Guardian...

2 + 2 = 4

Guardian calling Colossus...

2 + 2 = 4

(Who else remembers The Forbin Project...?)

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British poshos outdrink chavs

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

In 2008 5,999 men died an alcohol-related death against 3,032 women

So that's 9,000 deaths in the UK alone.

Remind me again why we're so afraid of terrorism...?

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