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* Posts by Graham Marsden

4956 posts • joined 19 Jan 2007

MoD turns to bloggers for advice on UK defence policy

Graham Marsden
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Grenade

Pour encourager les autres...

... or, at least, it would get rid of some of the redundant Admirals, Generals and so on...

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Aussie ISP beats Hollywood on 'copyright' rap

Graham Marsden
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Bravo Judge Cowdroy!

At last someone who gets the point that just because Hollywood squinnies does NOT mean they get their own way simply because they can afford lots of expensive lawyers.

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DNA pioneer lambasts government database policy

Graham Marsden
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Good for you Sir Alec!

Of course we now have to hope that the Government will actually *listen* to the advice they're given instead of ignoring it and blithely continuing to trample all over every liberty we have...

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Carbon trade phish scam disrupts exchanges

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

"This happens to banks about once or twice a month. And this is the same sort of thing...."

So why the F**K didn't you consider that before introducing this silly scheme with great big security holes in it??

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Google behavioral ad targeter is a Smart Ass

Graham Marsden
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"a browser plug-in that kept your opt-out"

Where can we get this...!

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US plans crewless automated ghost-frigates

Graham Marsden
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Why blow it up?

All you need is a "blocking" ship to put itself in the way of the robo-ship and whilst it's trying to dodge past that, the sub slips silently away...

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Head of Stats warns politicians: 'Hands off our numbers!'

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

Who else read that title as...

... "Head of Stasi"?!

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ID minister promises virtual immortality for all Britons

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

"is the Gov't exempt from the DPA?"

What do you think...?!

# Section 28 - National security. Any processing for the purpose of safeguarding national security are exempt from all the data protection principles, as well as Part II (subject access rights), Part III (notification), Part V (enforcement), and Section 55 (Unlawful obtaining of personal data).

# Section 29 - Crime and taxation. Data processed for the prevention or detection of crime, the apprehension or prosecution of offenders, or the assessment or collection of taxes are exempt from the first data protection principle.

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Spiderman Beetleman wall-crawl glove/boot tech invented

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

"It's a fun thing to think about,"

"You can think about making a credit card-sized device that you can put in a [...] door, and break it open with very little voltage," according to Steen.

Great for when you've forgotten your keys...

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Directgov battles terrorism with report-a-website page

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

"Be a Government Informer.

"...Betray Your Family & Friends. Fabulous Prizes to be Won!"

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Security firms plot revamp to minimise false alarms

Graham Marsden
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So why not just...

... have all the employees of your Anti-Virus company download the updates first? There should be sufficient computers of various configurations and installations amongst them to pick up most of the duff update problems.

And it would give your workers a much greater incentive to ensure that these sort of glitches don't happen in the first place!

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Britain warns businesses of Chinese 'honey trap'

Graham Marsden
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Coat

"lavish hospitality and flattery,"

Mine's the one with "I am a british businessman working with senstive commercial secrets" on the back...

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Extreme Pr0n - One Year On

Graham Marsden
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"The case...

... for driving a coach and horses through some basic principles of English Law feels equally unmade."

The case was, of course, *never* made in the first place, just a "precautionary principle" argument that "well, this material might cause problems and we don't like it, so let's ban it".

Meanwhile, however, we still have a book-burning law which says "if you've got anything that might fall under this law, you'd better delete it youself, just in case we nick you for something else and we use it as an easier way to get a conviction".

As for our worst fears not being realised, you miss out the important word "Yet". It took some while for Councils etc to realise the power that the RIPA gave them, but when they did figure it out, abuse of these powers rapidly became widespread.

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Google mystery server runs 13% of active websites

Graham Marsden
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Alert

Colossus calling Guardian...

2 + 2 = 4

Guardian calling Colossus...

2 + 2 = 4

(Who else remembers The Forbin Project...?)

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British poshos outdrink chavs

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

In 2008 5,999 men died an alcohol-related death against 3,032 women

So that's 9,000 deaths in the UK alone.

Remind me again why we're so afraid of terrorism...?

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Hong Kong Taoist masters still hard at it

Graham Marsden
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Coat

The lads from Lagos...

... must be kicking themselves for missing out all these past several years...!

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Interpol chief questions body scanner rollout

Graham Marsden
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@so...

Hey, don't be so nasty...

... to the chimpanzees!

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Sun takes over MoD's UFO bureau

Graham Marsden
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Alien

And in related news...

... Page 3 Stunna Lisa Lovely, 19, from Lincoln said "Wow! It's great that the soaraway Sun is taking over this vital job otherwise who knows who might be probing us when we're in bed!"

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French mock British G-spot probe

Graham Marsden
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And in other news...

... a group of male researchers claimed that the existence of the clitoris was a myth because they couldn't find it...

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Italians salute Mussolini on the iPhone

Graham Marsden
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Coat

Is this the...

.... iLDuce?

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Silicone implants that generate 'leccy invented for US spooks

Graham Marsden
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Coat

"a material which generates electricity when squeezed, mashed or wobbled"

Excuse me, miss, but I noticed your laptop battery is running a bit low, may I lend you a hand or two...?

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Fujitsu: 'iPad? That's ours'

Graham Marsden
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Coat

How about...

... iDon'tgiveacrap?

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Obama to scrap Moon, Mars expeditions - report

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

Politicians have no clue about anything.

And you clearly have no idea how to construct a sensible argument!

You complain about the "sheer idiocy" of the arguments, but then you go from "we don't need to go back to the moon" to "Technically, you don't need to eat either". Tell me, have you ever heard the expression "Straw Man"?

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Graham Marsden
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Boffin

The Myth of the 1970s Global Cooling Scientific Consensus

Dear Terry H, try doing a little basic research before digging up another long-discredited Zombie Argument:

http://ams.allenpress.com/archive/1520-0477/89/9/pdf/i1520-0477-89-9-1325.pdf

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Graham Marsden
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The previous post...

... was brought to you by Fox News.

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California school pulls 'oral sex' dictionary

Graham Marsden
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Grenade

Why do modern dictionaries insist on including phrases these days?

Because those phrases are part of the language and the point of a dictionary is to enable people to comprehend the language as it is use.

For instance you could look up the words "dick" and "head" separately but...

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Graham Marsden
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Coat

@"It’s hard to sit and read the dictionary..."

Yeah, but I skipped to the end and found that the Zebra did it...

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Graham Marsden
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WTF?

If I was their teacher...

... I'd set them an assignment on the Thomas Bowdler:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_Bowdler

(Followed by one on the First Amendment...!)

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Compulsory perv scanners upset everyone

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

That has to be...

... one of the most stupid examples of hobby-horse riding I've seen in a long time!

I have been to naturist events, I don't have an over-active sense of body-modesty, but just because British Naturism thinks that others shouldn't either is *NO* justification for treating everyone (me included) as a potential terrorist in another piece of nonsensical Security Theatre.

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Graham Marsden
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Coat

@We All Have Equal Rights

But don't you *want* a third glorious decade of total law enforcement...?!

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Graham Marsden
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Coat

You realise of course...

... that the next move will be to introduce corporate sponsorship of these scanners...

"Excuse me, Sir, would you step into this room a moment?"

"What's the problem?"

"Well, I couldn't help but notice that you are, shall we say, somewhat under-endowed, but our sponsors, MegaGrow(tm) supply these excellent pills..."

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Tesco store bans shopping in pyjamas

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

If you think this is a problem...

... then I strongly recommend you don't google for People of Walmart...!!

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Brit kids failing to fall out of trees

Graham Marsden
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Flame

Well obviously...

... it's because we're Thinking Of The Children(tm)!

We're protecting the poor little darlings from all those dangers out there, especially all those paedos who are lurking on every street corner.

Far better that our children die early from coronary heart disease...

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Aussie censor balks at bijou boobs

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

So...

... no shaved pubes either because that makes the woman "look like a child" too and that will obviously encourage paedophilic thoughts.

I just have to wonder, though, in whose minds these thoughts are being created, because it sounds to me like it's those passing the laws who are having them...

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Aussie man convicted for Simpsons smut

Graham Marsden
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Stop

Don't forget...

.. that following the introduction of the Dangerous Pictures Act in the UK we now have the Dangerous Drawings Act which, like the Australian Law, means it is "an offence for a person to be in possession of a prohibited image of a child."

See http://www.opsi.gov.uk/acts/acts2009/ukpga_20090025_en_5#pt2-ch2-pb1-l1g62

It is sufficient that an image *looks* like a child (in someone else's eyes) that will get you convicted.

Great, another victory for liberty and common sense...

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Rubber Duck banned from txt

Graham Marsden
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Stop

"who is there to hit??"

The person out for a walk, minding their own business who doesn't expect some prat to be riding along using a netbook instead of looking where they're going!

(I'm sure you've heard the expression "Sorry, Mate, I didn't see you...")

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Home Office says 'no decision' yet on sex offender disclosure

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

@Citizen Clueless

"i see some paedos have been in to disapprove of my comment."

And there you have a perfect example why a law like this is a bad idea because "anyone who disagrees with it or anyone who supports it must be a paedo!"

Forget about proof. Forget about due process of law. Forget about presumption of innocence, all we need now is suspicion and gossip and hearsay to ruin someone's life.

Oh and FYI the UK Police know where over *ninety eight percent* of all registered sex-offenders live.

In the USA where they have "Megan's Law" it's estimated that *twenty five percent* of registered sex-offenders have absconded.

I'm sure there's a conclusion that can be drawn...

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South African Police reveal Apple tablet photos

Graham Marsden
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Dead Vulture

Dear El Reg:

Keep taking the tablets...

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Solicitor General takes fresh pop at PunterNet

Graham Marsden
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Thumb Up

@Illegal?

Yes, it's entirely legal. It's no different from paying any other professional (lawyer, IFA, plumber etc) for their time.

The only difference is in the minds of Harperson et al who think that "I don't like this, so *you* shouldn't be allowed to do it", which has been the rationale behind much of their stupid and unworkable legislation like the Dangerous Pictures and Dangerous Drawings Acts.

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Graham Marsden
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FAIL

@ Well how about a non-IT solutiion?

I'm not sure if you're trolling or being ironic or just being stupid here.

If a woman works in a flat on her own and pays her rent from that money, she is not breaking any laws, nor is the landlord if they take the rent. And how is the Landlord going to *know* what the woman is doing to earn her money unless the landlord starts prying into the private affairs of everyone living in his building?

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Graham Marsden
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Stop

Don't reguate: Decriminalise

The problem with legislating prostitution is that, especially with a Government like this one, they'd come up with a virtually unworkable system that would end up over-loading the industry (for that is what it is) with pointless and useless regulations.

There are already examples of stupidity like this, eg if two women work at one address for their own safety, that is classed as "running a brothel" which is illegal. If they employ a security guard, he will be classed as a pimp and "living off immoral earnings". They can employ a "maid" to answer the door, but she can *only* be paid by the client giving her a tip (don't snigger) because, again, if she gets any money from the girl, she will be breaking the law.

All of those laws and many others should be struck off the statute books before there's even the slightest thought of introducing new ones, but that would be sensible...

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'You own the road!': Google gets spanking from media giant

Graham Marsden
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Stop

Google "owns" the motorway...

... which most people drive on.

Others may own the A Roads and B Roads, but they get less traffic because Google pretty much has a hammer-lock on the easiest route.

Buying a new car won't change this.

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Web2.0rhea infects International Space Station

Graham Marsden
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Coat

But...

... isn't this in breach of FCC rules on the use of mobile devices in flight...?!

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Amateur goof makes Twitter account hijacking a snap

Graham Marsden
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Flame

Wow! So you can hack a twitter account...

... and then...?

Who gives a fuck?!

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China swings at Clinton as Schmidt fudges exit plan

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

"to maintain political stability..."

Translation: To maintain the current corrupt rulers and administration in their jobs because they know that they'll be first against the wall when the next revolution comes...

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Crusty fireball space mango wrecks US doctor's office

Graham Marsden
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Dead Vulture

"mango-sized"?

So what's that in Bulgarian Funbags?

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Nominet appoints itself web policeman

Graham Marsden
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Thumb Down

Guilty...

... unless you can prove you're innocent.

Sounds like typical NuLabour.

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German dentists develop 'painless' plasma tooth-blaster

Graham Marsden
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Megaphone

So why not just...

... clean your damn teeth properly (and floss as well) and then you'll not have to suffer at all...!!

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MoD awards £540m extension to DII

Graham Marsden
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Grenade

On Time...

... On Budget...

Or...

... Works.

Pick any two from three.

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Manchester ID staff suffer isolation as new dawn fades

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

As usual...

... someone from the "Nothing to Hide" Brigade misses the point and it's more than a little ironic that you post from behind the shield of being an Anonymous Coward!

The point is not that the data is held on "various databases", the point (well, one of them) is that all that data will be held on *ONE* database and that it will be *YOUR* job to ensure that *THEY* have the right information and *YOU* will be punished by a fine if you don't!

And whilst the Government has been claiming that "have no plans" to make it compulsory to carry these cards, it's clear from what's been leaked that that is their ultimate aim, breaching the long established Common Law Right to "Go about your lawful business without let or hindrance".

Your Zombie Arguments have already been comprehensively knocked down in previous articles on El Reg, why not go back and actually look instead of digging them up once more?

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