Feeds

* Posts by Graham Marsden

4743 posts • joined 19 Jan 2007

Apple seeks patent on reality

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

What Apple (and the US Patent Office) need...

... is to get a *grip* on reality!

0
0

Iraqi insurgents hack US drones with $26 software

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

Why don't they...

... just extradite the insurgents to the USA and charge them with doing $70,000 worth of damage to US property...?

0
0

Surveying anonymity and the public good

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Stop

"a mindset on the part of some officials...

"... that if the end is for the public good, then it doesn’t matter if the rules around data collection get slightly bent."

Hmm, "it's for your own good", so don't you worry your pretty little heads about it, you can trust us, we're looking after you, just enjoy the Bread and Circuses, erm, I mean go and watch X-Factor and Strictly Come Dancing..."

Oh and as for "That would appear to be joined, at the lower levels of government, by a poor understanding of the letter of the law when it comes to Data Protection", and at the higher levels of government by a complete lack of understanding (or they just don't care) that the public don't trust them with our data...!

4
0

Government lets CCTV watchdog off the leash

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

Home Office research published in 2005...

"...showed that over 80% of respondents supported the use of CCTV to deal with crime in their neighbourhood."

Did they?

From http://www.homeoffice.gov.uk/rds/pdfs05/hors292.pdf

"Finally, although the public for the most part did not feel safer, and despite their perceiving

CCTV as less effective than they initially thought, they were still predominantly in favour of

its use. Even though they concluded that it did not reduce crime, there was no pressure to

have it removed, and there were no major concerns, once people had experienced CCTV,

about infringement of civil liberties."

That sounds like less than a ringing endorsement to me. Also look at Appendix A which is rather critical of the methodology and the lack of control groups for much of the data.

And from the conclusions: "Assessed on the evidence presented in this report, CCTV cannot be deemed a success. It has cost a lot of money and it has not produced the anticipated benefits"

Basically (unsurprisingly) the Home Office has spun the results to give the answers they want.

7
0

Official: British telly really is almost all repeats

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Dead Vulture

Meaningless comparisons

The complaints about TV being "All repeats" were perfectly valid when we only had three terrestrial channels to watch and no satellite or cable, let alone 4od, iPlayer, Watch Again etc.

Now we have +1 channels, BBC 3, More4, Sky 2 and 3, Dave, Alibi, Watch, Yesterday etc etc yes, we're getting old stuff shown again, but this is *not* to the exclusion of *new* material.

And are all these "repeats" such a bad thing? When Blake's 7 was first broadcast I missed the first two episodes due to my parents insisting I do my homework first (which dates me!) and it was a long while before I could actually see what happened in the beginning. These days I'd just switch to a +1 channel or watch the repeat later in the week on BBC3 or equivalent.

So, really, what's the big deal?

2
0

LHC Xmas shutdown today - massive boffin roister planned

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Coat

So...

... how long before someone says "Hey, how about we try roasting the turkey in the LHC"?

0
0

Intel staff 'fired' in ring piece stunt

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

Fake!

Type your comment here — plain text only, no HTML

0
0

ID card minister forgets ID card

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

"Under the current situation...

"...people bring their details in and they get lost. This saves a lot of messing around."

Yes, when we have ID cards and a National ID Register we won't have to lose details one at a time, we can lose them *ALL* in one go!

That will save *so much* messing around!!!

1
0

Home Secretary unmoved by last-ditch McKinnon protests

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

Johnson also restated his determination...

... that the 43 year-old ought to be treated "fairly"

Just not by anyone in the UK, especially not the Home Secretary!

1
0

Facebookers made into fans of Berlsuconi in post-attack row

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Dead Vulture

Umm...

Who is this "Berlsuconi" bloke mentioned in the title...?

1
0

Google weighs in to Aussie firewall row

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

Do no...

... hypocrisy...!

1
0

Google says ad blockers will save online ads

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

"Online advertisers will ensure their ads aren't too annoying,"

ROFLALALAL!

Oh yeah, like if that was ever going to happen in these days of AdBlock Plus it would have *already* happened!

I read in forums about people on Facebook complaining about one ad for smilies that if you accidentally rolled your mouse over would yell "HELLO!" through your speakers. Of course every one of them wants to know how to stop that happening again and they get the same answer: Firefox and ABP.

Way to lose customers guys!!

0
0

Philip K. Dick's kid howls over Googlephone handle

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

@Nexus is a common dictionary word

So is Apple!

But try telling that to Apple Corporation and Apple Music...

1
0

Data collector threatens scribe who reported breach

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

Another perfect example...

... of the Streisand Effect!

How many people would have heard of the vulnerability of this system if they hadn't been so stupid as to try to sue someone for helping them?

2
0

Loud sex woman coughs to ASBO breach

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

15th December 2010 (i.e. today):

Err, can I borrow your time machine....?

1
1

3 billion have suffered Slade's 'Merry Xmas Everybody'

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Up

You mean...

... "Just Another Christmas Song" by the Tull

"Hey, Santa. Pass us that bottle!"

0
0

German shoppers slug it out with salami

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

Why does this remind me of...

... the Great Tea Trolley Disaster of ‘67?

0
0

US Congress earmarks $30m for anti-piracy fight

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Down

"The MPAA, on behalf of the motion picture industry...

"... commends Congress and the Obama Administration for this commitment to our continued large wage packets and bonuses"

There, corrected it for you :-)

2
0

GSHP: The green tech even carbon sceptics will like

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Now let's hear more of this sort of thing...

... Forget all the pointless "Global Warming is Man Made", "No it isn't!", "Tis so!" arguments and let's just hear positive things that people can do to actually lower their energy consumption and save themselves money instead!

1
0

Vigilantes R US: Private enterprise takes over

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

@I remember...

... I don't need to google for it, I live just a few miles down the road from Paulsgrove and when the News of the Screws did their "let's try to boost circulation by putting up pictures of paedos" my friends who actually lived there were more terrified of the lynch mob roaming the streets than any putative threat to their childre ...

4
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Stop

"they have a team working full time"

Translation, they've probably got a few people googling for words like "paedo" and "pervert" and no doubt getting dozens of hits off the websites of such esteemed organisations as The Sun and the News of the World (those well known researchers and verifiers of facts!)

Of course I'm sure that if someone is convicted, but then cleared on appeal, these people will immediately correct the data in their records and point out that someone has been exonerated of any wrong-doing...

... won't they...?

PS I had to laugh (cynically) when I read the ACPO's statement that "It's a basic principle of civilised society that public protection is best served by an evidence-based approach led by law enforcement authorities..."

Great idea, guys, why not try it? (See "I'm a photographer not a terrorist!" for just one example)

2
0

Durham police demonstrate DNA will stuff you

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

@Absolute offences

The expression AIUI is actually "Strict Liability Offences" and there are plenty more of those in UK law than the two you mention.

Originally the idea was that they would stop employers from avoiding responsibility for injuries to workers by claiming that nobody was personally responsible for the accident (no "mens rea" or "guilty mind", so nobody could be charged so, quite rightly, the law was changed to make the business as a whole responsible.

But now there is, of course, the law regarding "extreme pornography" where simply possession of an image is enough to prove guilt *unless* you can prove that you were a "direct participant" in what was being done. Another examples is selling alcohol to a child (hence all those "challenge 21" stickers) because the retailer has to prove that they did *not* sell alcohol to a child.

The Government loves Strict Liability offences because they make getting convictions so much easier even though they are a clear breach of Paragraph 2 of Article 6 of the European Convention on Human Rights which say you have the Right to be Presumed Innocent...

1
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

Bad call!

The point that El Reg is trying to make and that you seem to be missing is that it is the *arrest* which is "on suspicion of possession of a banned substance"

Note the word SUSPICION there, suspicion is not proof of guilt, you still have the right to be presumed innocent unless proven guilty and if the substance is found to be innocuous, you should be released without a stain on your character.

But what the Police are saying is that it is the simple matter of the *arrest* that can screw your future employment prospects, NOT a conviction for any offence!

6
1

Facebook urges public exposure in 'privacy' revision

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

Half and half...

I've just logged onto my FB account (look, I use it for playing Scrabble, ok?!) and some of the privacy options on the "About Me" and "Family Relationships etc" section default to "Old Settings" and others are set to "everyone".

On the "Photos and Videos", "Birthday" and "Religious Views" I'm given the option of "Friends of Friends" or "Old settings" but when I mouse over the buttons on Old Settings, it tells me that they're set to Friends of Friends already...!

0
0

Pompidou turns to NFC, Facebook to attract teens

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

And there was me thinking...

... that NFC stood for "Not For Children"...!

0
0

Tory peers to protect kids from anuses

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

We're not sure what...

... Lords Howard and de Mauley have been playing to warrant their concerns.

I think they've been playing silly buggers!

0
0

Gordon Brown declares another new era in gov IT

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

people don't want a government that tells them what to do

Wow! And it's taken 12 years of increasing public anger at increasing Labour authoriatarianism for you to realise that?

And, what, you expect them to forget all of that in the next few months before your sorry arses are booted out of offices you are not fit to hold...??

Fail, because that's what Labour have done time and time again.

1
0

TSA, HSBC in secret doc redaction oopsie

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

"deficiency in the software..."

ITYM deficiency in the idiots who thought that they could simply put a black block over something and it was magically gone!

Comments about bad workmen blaming their tools come to mind.

0
0

Webmasters fume as Google profiles signed-out searchers

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

SEOs are not all bad

My business website uses a SEO simply because without it my shopping cart system just comes up with a URL that's a meaningless alpha-numeric stream instead of the name of the product which makes it harder to search for (as well as bookmark).

That doesn't ITEM mean I'm ITEM trying to BUZZWORD game the ITEM system by UNRELATED BUT POPULAR SEARCH TERM loading the page ITEM with other INFORMATION information which will BUZZWORD push my ITEM up the GOOGLE results...

1
0

Google chief: Only miscreants worry about net privacy

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

ALL YOUR DATA...

... ARE BELONG TO US!

1
4

MIT win DARPA's flashcrowd balloon-hunt compo

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

@Ian Ferguson

That was what I was just thinking, but you got there first!

(PS so if I reply to your post and someone then "upvotes" you, do I get half the value of the upvote...?)

4
0

Lots of young adults still sexting shock

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

@ElFatbob

Just because a naked picture appears on the internet doesn't make it bad, unless you're some prudish, narrow-minded prod-nose who thinks that it makes someone "a slut" or unsuitable to work as a teacher/ social worker/ whatever.

The correct answer to "why are naked pics bad" is "they aren't, now fnck off and mind your own business..."

2
1
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

And...

... writing stupid posts making Ad Hominem attacks and ridiculous Straw Man arguments doesn't make you look like an idiot.

Oh, hang on...

1
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

"young people aren't listening to the advice..."

... and in a recent survey, 100% of teenagers replied "Whatever..."

0
0

Germans devise attacks on Windows BitLocker

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

"hardware-level phishing attack..."

"...in which a target machine is replaced with a counterfeit one that provides precisely the same messages and prompts that the original machine would have produced."

So why not just swap the keyboard for an identical one with a keylogger built in like they did on The Real Hustle?

1
0

MS Jingle Bell bus rattles past Reg Towers

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Happy

@Piezor

Well, at least you've proved you're not a member of the Sugababes, but you might need a new irony detector... ;-)

1
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

Hey Sugababes...!

It's great to hear you're supporting Windows 7, but can you tell me...

Why do upgrades from Vista hang at 62%?

Why don't it always recognising DVD drive?

Why does it change custom icons?

I'm in no hurry, take your time...

0
0

Lord Carlile: Police are taking the proverbial on terror

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Up

"could lead to members of the public becoming more aware of their rights"

I know there's a whole bunch of posts here already on this subject, but I just wanted to add my voice to them!

People should become aware of their rights, since this seems to be the only way to counter the abuse of powers by the Police who, at the moment, are getting away with trampling on every right we have simply because they can and the sheeple are too afraid to object.

But what this highlights is a more dangerous problem in that the Police don't actually know (or care about) the rights of the people they are harassing and think (to quote Judge Dredd) "I am the Law!" and the law is whatever they think it is.

What we need is less "target oriented" Policing, less "box ticking" and less petty-minded BS and more actual Policing, unfortunately what we get is them rearranging the deck-chairs on the Titanic...

1
0

Who owns science? Manchester Manifesto can't answer

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

Hmm...

Message from the Large Hadron Collider staff:

We have just discovered the Higgs Boson. We now own the patent to this particle and nobody else is allowed to create them or research them without paying us a licence fee...

0
0

Tech-savvy UK kids = (over)confident writers

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Troll

Becos...

Wiv haiku u hav

2 think abt wot u rite.

OMG! one one

1
0

World Cup to be shown in 3D

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Oh good...

... another reason not to watch it!

1
0

Space butterflies invade ISS

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Coat

Where's Godzilla?

Everyone knows that these butterflies are going to mutate in Outer Space and become the equivalent of Mothra when they come back to Earth...!

0
0

Google pockets half of 'unlicensed' news dollars, says study

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Down

Welcome to modern news...

The fact of the matter now is that a lot of modern "news reporting" consists of stories grubbed off the AP/ Reuters wires or similar without any attempt to actually research them.

Try searching for a popular news story and you'll find fifty or more virtually identical versions, some with edits in, others copied verbatim.

The only ones that aren't like this are the "breaking news" stories that often contain wildly inaccurate speculation or "facts" which later turn out to be nonsense as a result of the "24 hour news cycle" that results in the "publish or broadcast first and worry about the details later" attitude.

0
0

UK.gov may abolish edited electoral roll

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Stop

Data collected for electoral purposes...

... should only be used for those purposes.

What a great idea!

Parliament should pass an Act, say one for, oh, I don't know, Protection of Data, that has rules which state that Data must only collected for specific purposes and can only be used *for* those purposes and that the Data should not be disclosed (or sold) to others *without* the consent of the individual.

Maybe they could even have someone called a Commissioner for Information whose job it was to ensure those rules are obeyed and who had the power to do something if they were broken.

I wonder why nobody thought of this before...?

3
0

DARPA balloon-hunt compo: Stand by for skulduggery

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Coat

The end of the world is nigh...!

... This is what we've waited for,

This is it boys, this is war!

The President is on the line

As 99 red balloons go by...

Nena - 99 Red Balloons

0
0

Boffins: Stress of family Xmas can cause fatal diseases

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Dead Vulture

In other news...

... oh you know the rest: bears, woods, Popes etc...

1
0

Bumbling NJ firemen, cops blown up in 'huge fireball'

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

Oil and water, it can be done...

... as Mythbusters proved.

(Ok, so it needs a hell of a lot of water, but WTH!)

0
0

Border agency to start fingerprint checks

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Stop

But what about the yanks...?

I have often thought about visiting America, however I have no intention of ever visiting it until they stop treating me as a terrorist suspect simply for wanting to go there.

The question is will Merkins visiting the UK be required to give these details and, if not, why not (or is it just another one-sided treaty that means we dance to their tune?)

0
0

Italian prosecutors seek jail time for Google execs

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Stop

could spell the end of Web 2.0 in Italy...

... so, no loss there, then!

0
1

Microsoft enlists faceless girl band as face of Windows 7

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Up

@New forum style comments voting scheme is pants

Very true.

Having to hit the "Back" button is just inelegant.

Also there seems to be no option to "view all comments on one page".

5
0