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* Posts by Graham Marsden

4975 posts • joined 19 Jan 2007

3D-printed bikini goes on sale

Graham Marsden
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"underwear is hardly a complex shape"

Try telling that to any woman who isn't a "standard size" and she'll tell you exactly how difficult it is to get a bra that fits her properly, gives the right support and doesn't dig in etc.

I've had several girlfriends with "non-standard" figures and even with the whole underbust/ overbust/ cup size system there's still a huge variation in supposedly identical bras, so anything that may actually benefit them would be welcomed by many women.

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Belching cattle apocalypse menace sniffed in cowpats

Graham Marsden
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@nyelvmark

That was exactly what I was thinking as I read that article (although showing them soap operas might count as cruelty to animals...!)

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Virgin IT dept shocked by donkey-shagging Taliban

Graham Marsden
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Headmaster

"may have been in breach of the Obscene Publications Act"

No, because the OPA covers "publication for gain", ie publishing *and selling* something.

This case wouldn't even come under the Extreme Porn Act unless it could be demonstrated that the images were intended "for sexual arousal" and that they were kept for "an unreasonable length of time" and actively sought out by the recipients instead of being sent to them unsolicited.

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Google grabs social networking trawler PostRank

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

"claims to make sense from the likes of...

"... Facebook, Twitter and other social networking sites."

Great, so now all the spammers and dubious SEO services are going to be increasing the spread of their rubbish on these sites in the hope that they'll be able to boost their search engine rankings :-(

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CEOP announces 'record results' in child protection battle

Graham Marsden
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Meh

@Pete B

"Surely they're only offenders when they're actually prosecuted?"

Fine, add the word "successfully" in between "actually" and "prosecuted". Ok?

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Graham Marsden
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Childcatcher

What they don't say...

... is that, for instance, Colin Blanchard, the man who persuaded Vanessa George and three other women to abuse children, was only caught *by accident*

So despite all of their empire building and "panic buttons" and new laws making drawing illegal and so on, this man was only arrested and his "network" broken up by sheer dumb luck.

Of course that wouldn't play so well in the media, so instead we hear that 414 children have been "safeguarded" (how?) that "513 child sex offenders" have been arrested (how do you know they're "offenders" if they've only been arrested? Surely they're only offenders when they're actually prosecuted?) and "132 child sex offender networks" have been "dismantled" (what is the definition of a "network" here? How were they "dismantled"?)

In other words, a lot of hot air, but not much detail.

Oh and in other news:

"Paedophilia warning over King's Park pupil dress sense

"Parents have been advised not to dress their schoolchildren in short skirts and tight trousers amid fears they could be targeted by paedophiles."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-glasgow-west-13601917

Perhaps they should switch to Burkhas?

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Notorious Russian spammer 'admits child abuse'

Graham Marsden
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Nice to be recognised :-)

The thing is, when someone says "child abuse and BDSM often go together" it pushes a big red button for me because that was the sort of thing that people were saying to justify the Dangerous Pictures Act (aka the Extreme Porn legislation)

Sure, regrettably, I have no doubts that some child abusers might use BDSM equipment (or similar) in their crimes, but that's not at all the same as BDSM between consenting adults which is why I objected to them (possibly unwittingly) being associated.

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Graham Marsden
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@Unfortunately they do go together

"as a victim of abuse I have to say that child abuse and BDSM unfortunately do often go together"

I'm not denying you were abused, nor that *some* people may abuse children and engage in fetish or BDSM-like activities, however I have to object to your use of the word "often".

I have been making and selling BDSM gear for 18 years and have had a similar long association with the Fetish Scene (plus a more than passing familiarity with the legal side of such matters) and I cannot off-hand think of any cases where someone had participated in BDSM activities (ie between consenting adults) *and*, separately, had abused children.

Certainly someone who abuses children may also possess "a whip, handcuffs, and sex toys" to add to their activities, but I would not count that as being into BDSM by any usual understanding of the term.

Yes, abuse, regrettably, happens and, yes, abuse happens in BDSM relationships too, however I do not feel that a claim that "child abuse and BDSM *often* go together" is valid.

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China goes on attack over Google phishing claims

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

Why the hell...

... are "senior U.S. government officials" using Gmail in the first place???

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WW2 naval dazzle-camo 'could beat Taliban RPGs'

Graham Marsden
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Trollface

Don't worry, Lewis...

... I'm sure the Americans have something better that we could buy for half the price...

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Gov 'skunkworks' to develop e-petitions system

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

So what was wrong...

... with the previous Petition Number 10 system?

Well, apart from the fact that, of course, it was totally ignored, with people getting responses that were either "we can't do anything about this" or "thank you for your comments, now fuck off, plebs"...

But why are they spending money developing a new system at all?

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Tragedy nurse's boyf fined over medical records abuse

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

"Makin had accessed the relevant records...

"...without any legitimate reason to do so, and the Information Commissioner's Office (ICO) was called in."

And the ICO decided to issue him with a firm smack on the wrist and a finger wagging whilst saying "you're a naughty boy, don't do it again!"

FFS how much longer can this bunch of spineless incompetents keep on doing this before our Government realises that the ICO is simply not fit for purpose and replaces them with a Watchdog that has both a set of teeth and the balls to use them?

If our NHS records get uploaded to some form of central database this sort of thing will be going on every bloody day!

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Barnsley clamps down on foul-mouthed fu*king locals

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

Well...

... Frak me, the frelling grexnixes have really gone over the swutting line now!

What a bunch of turlingdromes...

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Engineering students design tent for camping on Mars

Graham Marsden
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Alien

Duck Dodgers...

.... was, of course, in the Twenty Fourth and a Half century!

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Pentagon: Hack attacks can be act of war

Graham Marsden
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Trollface

China's Blue Army...?

What? They're Pompey supporters?

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Personal jetpacks and solar-powered ships

Graham Marsden
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Not a Jetpack, but who cares?

It's still pretty damn cool and I'd like one! :)

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Rumbled benefits cheats offer sensational excuses

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

Lazy gits...?

"I know a few people who haven't worked a day in the last 5 years or more and there's nothing wrong with them. Nothing at all."

And I know people who haven't worked a day in the last 5 years (or more) and who would *love* to work. They have been on endless "training courses" and "back to work" schemes and all the rest of the MSC (that's the Massive Statistical Cover-up because whilst they're on these schemes they're not classed as "out of work and claiming benefits), but, despite all that, when the job centre are sending thirty or forty people out for interviews for *every* job vacancy, the odds of them actually getting work are pretty bloody slim.

As for "one way would be to raise the minimum wage." who, exactly is going to *PAY* them that money? If you hadn't noticed, there's a recession on at the moment and most businesses are looking to cut costs, not pay more, so you'd actually get *fewer* people working. It's not exactly rocket science...

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Reindeer can see in ultraviolet, say boffins

Graham Marsden
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Coat

You forgot...

... that such nocturnal vision would also help those reindeer tasked with the important job of drawing Santa's sleigh...!

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Roboprobe spacecraft off to grope asteroid

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

In any case...

... that should really be 974.45 nano Wales.

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McKinnon's mum applauds Obama extradition stance

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

"returned the bust of Churchill"

Apart from that being a gift to a *different* President, if you'd done a little more research you would have found that Obama's grandfather was in Kenya at the time of the Mau Mau uprising when Britain rejected the demands of that country's people for greater representation and land reform and Churchill ordered in the military who used repressive measures and torture (sound familiar) to try to put it down. Obama's grandfather was one of the victims of these measures.

So is it really any wonder that he doesn't want a reminder of that in his office?

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Google borgs fledgling price comparison site

Graham Marsden
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Coat

Blimey...

... I know what I'm doing for the next few days...

1) Cobble together a Beta price comparison site

2) Sell it to Google

3) Profit!

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Euro report slates wireless comms, recommends smoke and mirrors

Graham Marsden
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Dead Vulture

It's not that..

... I don't agree with the content of this piece, but frankly it reads like a rant rather than informed opinion. Come on, El Reg, you can do better than this.

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Journos 'risk charges' for covering Parliamentary debates

Graham Marsden
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Not missing the point at all!

"A public interest test should be applied when one is planning to step away from the norm."

Oh really? And who decides what this "norm" Is? As I've posted before, I make BDSM equipment but it is *MY* choice to post that, not yours nor anyone else's.

What about someone being gay? If they choose to "out" themselves, that's up to them, but I don't accept that anyone else has the right to do that unless they're preaching from an anti-gay stance.

You say "the rule should be that anyone has the right to publish anything unless it can be shown that it is in the public interest to suppress" and whilst I can agree with that, it's only when that there is actually a public interest benefit in publication.

Revealing details of someone's private life simply to sell newspapers etc is *not* in the public interest because there is no benefit to the public.

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Graham Marsden
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@No Sympathy

You say you "can see no merit in the suppression of legitimate news stories due to the embarrassment they may cause whoever it is this week caught with their pants off... (or wearing the wrong pants)" but you miss the difference between "What the Public may be interested in" and "Public Interest (meaning "what is of benefit to the Public")

The media (bless their cotton socks) are, of course, deliberately trying to blur and confuse the distinction because the former is what sells more newspapers/ gets more viewers even though there is no *benefit* to the public other than some salacious tittle-tattle to liven up their breakfasts.

Revealing someone as a hypocrite (eg John Major preaching "family values" whilst he's shagging Edwina Currie on the side) is perfectly legitimate reporting, but stories about "We caught X in bed with Y" is just muck-raking gutter journalism.

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Graham Marsden
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@Absurd

Also does BBC Parliament Channel have to put in a time delay with a "CENSOR" button to bleep out any names that might be covered by an injunction...?

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Adam Curtis: The Rise of the Machines

Graham Marsden
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"hopefully this particular series will strike a topical chord"

Hopefully it's a bit more interesting than that turgid, pretentious and over-long trailer...

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Hollywood to 'retell' Carrie

Graham Marsden
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What added value...?

Not added value, just added sex, violence and gore most likely.

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Schmidt explains the Google way to self-erasure

Graham Marsden
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"Better to have industry best practice emerge unimpeded by red tape"

In other words "It's easier to get forgiveness than permission" or "we'll go ahead and do what we want until someone eventually passes a law to stop us which we can't ignore or bypass..."

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Eight New Yorkers sue Baidu for $16m

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

Howls...

... of derisive laughter, Bruce!

"the complaint claims violation of the US Constitution. It names Baidu and, unusually, the Chinese government as defendants in the case."

So, typical Yank behaviour thinking that *their* laws apply to the whole world!

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Iran accused of hacking nuke inspectors' phones, PCs

Graham Marsden
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Troll

Blimey...

... I can actually agree with Matt Bryant on something!

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Amazon US offers gift cards, free shipment for your e-junk

Graham Marsden
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@Not sure it'll happen here

AFAIK that's only if they're sold through eg a charity shop, not if it's a private sale.

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Supreme Court: DNA database retention regs are unlawful

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

"The European Court of Human Rights...

"... ruled against this practice in 2008, but current guidance from the Association of Chief Police Officers (ACPO) states that chief constables" can tell people to fuck off because the ACPO thinks it knows better than the ECHR and the British Government is probably going to do likewise...

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David Davis: Jobless should dig trenches for fat UK pipes

Graham Marsden
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Stop

Which part of...

"Building a superfast rural broadband network is largely low-skill" didn't you understand?

Job Centre Drone: So, what qualifications do you have?

Unemployed geek: Well, I can program in Java, C++, Ruby, Python...

Job Centre Drone: Excellent, we have a perfect job for you, digging trenches for Broadband Cables!

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Downing Street e-petition site to get new Directgov home

Graham Marsden
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Flame

Because...

... it gives the People a forum where they can cry out in the belief that someone, somewhere in Government, will hear their pleas and actually give a shit instead of going ahead and doing whatever they want...

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Apple proposes even tinier SIMs for future iPhones, iPads

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

Please make sure...

... your Irony Detector is switched on before posting...

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Dixons to flog off old 'brands' Miranda and Saisho

Graham Marsden
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Perhaps...

... they're hoping that people would have forgotten the sort of cheap plastic junk that Dixons put out under the Saisho label...

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Serial hacker TinKode rifles through NASA satellite files

Graham Marsden
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Grenade

"he is motivated more by intellectual curiosity than mischief"

Doesn't matter. Based on another current story in El Reg, we can expect a Declaration of War imminently!

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NHS IT dino-project NPfIT should be killed off - NAO

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

I'm allergic...

... to being hit by buses!

Perhaps I should have that included on my medical records...?

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Hack attacks on US could spark military action

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

Team America - World (Cyber) Police

Fuck Yeah!!

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BMW tests laser-guided car junction buddy

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

The expression S.M.I.D.S.Y...

... or "Sorry Mate, I Didn't See You" will now be replaced by S.M.M.L-G.A.A.S.D.S.Y or "Sorry Mate, My Laser-Guided Accident Avoidance System Didn't See You".

Of course what both still mean is that the idiot behind the wheel didn't bother to make proper observation when pulling out of the junction.

THINK BIKE!

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Israeli couple dub sprog 'Like'

Graham Marsden
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A daughter called "Like"

I think that the dad is going to start regretting this when she gets to her teenage years and the number of boys liking Like increases...

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Geek.com visitors attacked by DIY exploit kit

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

Re: Sandbox the web-browser

Ok, on a site called geek.com, users might be expected to understand what Sandboxing is, but for most people the response would be "WTF is Sandboxing? I go to the site in IE I click on stuff, pages come up, what's the problem?"

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Teenage duo sentenced over credit card Ghostmarket

Graham Marsden
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@Stiffer sentences required...

The Daily Mail forums are that way ---->

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Sun attempts to ID entire FA Cup Final crowd

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

I think some people...

... need to check the settings on their irony detectors...

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Bin Laden's porn stash: Too good to be true?

Graham Marsden
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@"Seems to be a standard smear tactic."

Only because they probably thought they couldn't get people to believe that it was actually kiddy porn...

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Up to $650 for a .xxx domain - or to keep your name off one

Graham Marsden
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Stop

"apply to have their brands permanently "blocked" in .xxx."

"Nice domain you have here, Squire.

"Be a shame if anything happened to it, know what I mean..."

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Peugeot compo cam aids amateur espionage

Graham Marsden
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Grenade

SECURITY!

Don't Peugeot know that Al Qaeda will be using this to plan attacks!!!

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Software pirates should offer up more booty, says BSA

Graham Marsden
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Stop

"Industry lobby group" says...

"Software companies should be entitled to bigger damages for the use of copied software."

Well *there's* a surprise now, boys and girls...!

(Where's that Pope/ Bear icon El Reg?!)

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Haumea: Mysterious radioactive rugby-ball world

Graham Marsden
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Alien

Erm...

... I think you mean "Gray Area" aka "Meatfucker" ;-)

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Glass aeroplanes and iPads on the way, say boffins

Graham Marsden
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Alien

Erm, ok...

... but I can't see any Pierson's Puppeteers around here right now...

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