Feeds

* Posts by Graham Marsden

4984 posts • joined 19 Jan 2007

Jedi light-sabre beats Taser in Oregon parking-lot fracas

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

@Nextweek and Audrey S.Thackery

Remember that the Taser is supposed to be a Non-Lethal (oops, I mean *less* lethal) alternative to using firearms yet, despite that, there have been around 500 deaths linked to Taser use, more than a few of which have been related to the target having using illegal narcotics.

Given that a plastic light-saber is not a deadly weapon, using a Taser in a situation like this was completely unnecessary and I don't see that as "minimising risk to the suspect".

40
4

Google's Siri-a-like to be named 'Majel' after Trek actress

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

Not without...

... a ouija board!

5
0

Microsoft copies Google with silent browser updates

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Mushroom

...and no focus stealing either!

After the last lot of patches downloaded and installed, as usual Windows decided that what *it* was doing was more important than what I was doing and flashed up a message saying "You need to reboot", making that the active window.

Fortunately they've at least stopped auto-selecting the "Reboot Now" button with the result that if you're typing (as I was) and press Return at the wrong moment, you automatically reboot without having the chance to save what you're working on...

14
0

Facebook won't deny it is sitting on huge mountain of cash

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Down

Aha! They won't deny it, so it must be true!!!!

Dear me, El Reg, is that the best you can come up with?

1
0

Comet Lovejoy spotted plunging toward fiery doom

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Coat

Set the controls...

... for the heart of the sun!

3
0

CERN: 'New physics starts now'

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Coat

"If people still wore as many hats as formerly"...

... So are you saying that people aren't wearing enough hats?

With apologies to Python (Monty)

5
0

FCC (finally) cracks down on BLARING! TV! ADS!

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

Another simple solution...

... Everything I want to watch, I record on Sky+ consequently ad breaks are a matter of pressing the fast forward button and counting an appropriate number of seconds before I press play again.

Bingo, no noisy ads!

3
0

Cosmic Cannonball snapped blazing a bloody trail of star guts

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Up

@David D. Hagood

Damn, you beat me to it! :-)

1
1

Jimbo Wales ponders Wikipedia blackout

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

@Turtle

Would you like to buy a new Irony Detector? Yours seems to be broken.

3
0

Beeb rescues old Who episodes

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Unhappy

Strewth mate...

... What a bunch of wowsers!

1
0

Senators: Globo-domains could mean consumer chaos

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Down

ICANN...

... make lots of money from this!

0
0

Judge Dredd vs Zombies

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

Re: Anti-hero?

Six months, creep!

0
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge

Paying for top-ups...

Many years ago you could play games like Space Invaders and those which followed for one 10p coin, one play.

Then came games like Gauntlet where (unless you were incredibly skilled) you had to keep shoveling in coins in order to get further into the game (or not play, which I did).

This paying for top-ups is the same thing, writ on new technology.

0
0

Google set to begin appeal against Italian guilty verdicts

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

@JimC

Since you apparently need me to spell it out for you, please allow me to explain:

Firstly, it's clear that you don't run a business since, if you did, it would rapidly become bankrupt because trying to solve a problem like this by simply "employing a lot of people" would just be throwing money down the drain.

Secondly, you miss the fact, whilst it is, indeed, up to business to comply with the law, to try to make a global business compliant with *every* law, *everywhere* would be an even bigger waste of money and utterly futile.

I do run a business and supply products worldwide, but due to the adult nature of those products, they are not legal in certain countries. Now if someone from one of those countries chooses to order a product from me, should I be required to ascertain whether my product is legal under that country's laws or is the onus on the customer to ensure that they are not breaking that country's laws buy ordering it. You seem to think that the former is the case, even though I am breaking no laws in my country by selling the item. If I supply that person, should I be liable for arrest in their country?!

If Google were to accept the Italian ruling, then they would have to start censoring *everything* on Youtube and every search result and every g-mail to ensure that it didn't breach some country's laws which would be so monumentally expensive and so monumentally ridiculous that these flaws should be obvious.

0
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

@JimC

"Employ a lot of people", I would laugh at this ironic joke, except it seems you appear to think that you're making a sensible and reasonable suggestion.

There again you also appear to think that "if their business model is predicated on ignoring the law and hoping it will go away, how is that the law's problem?" is a reasonable (and accurate) argument too.

Unfortunately both of these are fundamentally flawed in ways that are so obvious I can't even be bothered to point out the fallacies.

0
1
Graham Marsden
Silver badge

@Grease Monkey

Is the fact that the porn on YouTube gets taken down quickly because a) google spot it or b) other people spot it and complain?

In any case, the issue is not "is this porn or not" (which is reasonably easy to determine) but "is this illegal in some country somewhere in the world", which is not because that requires a much more subjective value judgement.

0
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

@JimC and AC

According to Youtube (also owned by Google) somewhere between 24 and 48 hours of video are uploaded *EVERY MINUTE*!

How on earth do you expect them to pre-screen that much content and make sure that everything they see is acceptable in *every* country in the world???

(Oh, and as regards the the Post Office too. I *know* that letters are private, I simply chose that as an easy to understand example to point was that it is the sheer unfeasibility of checking that much content)

0
1
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

@AC

I think you've just manged to completely miss the point.

Google took the clip down when they were made aware of it, but the prosecutors in this case are saying that the defendants in this case were found guilty because "Google should have sought permission from those involved before putting the video online".

To say that Google should pre-screen *everything* that someone puts on GoogleVid is like saying that the Post Office should pre-screen every letter sent via their service, it is completely unfeasible and a ridiculous law.

1
1
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Stop

@JimC - The law is an ass!

If you follow the logic of your argument through, then Google will have to pre-screen every bit of content according to the laws of *EVERY* country in the world!

What if you choose to post a clip making fun of Kemal Ataturk, the founder of Modern Turkey? That's illegal in that country, so should Google have to pre-screen and refuse to distribute it because the Turks don't like it?

And what about all those naughty clips which are illegal in many other countries? How can google pre-screen everything unless they employ specialist staff from every country in the world to check that they're not breaching each country's law?

I have no love for Google, but if they don't fight this one and win it will have a chilling effect on freedom of expression across the world.

3
3

Cops bust den of text-spam spewers

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

After you forward them, but before you delete them...

... save the number in your phone's memory under "Spam" or "Junk" or similar.

That way the next time one comes from the same source, you can delete it without even wasting time reading it :-)

0
0

Mythbusters cannonball ‘myth-fires’

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

@laird cummings

If you'd done your homework (or even have read the article) you'd have noticed that they were a) testing the velocity they could get from a home made cannon, b) had water barrels *and* an earth berm behind them.

What appears to have gone wrong is that the velocity was much greater than they had anticipated, consequently the trajectory of the cannonball was too high, going over the water barrels and then skipping off the berm, causing it to be lofted towards the houses.

It's easy with hindsight to think that they should have aimed it with a lower trajectory etc, but given that the officials at the Alameda County Bomb Range let them fire it (which I doubt very much they'd have done if they thought this could happen) this is clearly just an unfortunate series of events rather than a lack of "homework".

4
0

UK.gov uses Experian data to sniff out fraudsters

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Up

@AC

And they've never accidentally linked the data of two unrelated people, nor denied someone credit based on what a previous occupant of that address did, nor mis-recorded data so that the details of someone with the same name affect your records...

Nope, this never happens...

1
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Up

@dephormation.org.uk

But don't you know we're now all presumed guilty unless we can prove our innocence!

Got something to hide...? Well, not any more!

2
1

God particle may be within our grasp

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Happy

@oldredlion

ITYM Playmobil!

3
1

Globe slowly warming, insists 'Hansen's Bulldog'

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Thumb Down

"Judge for yourselves"...

... I'd love to, but even if that link wasn't broken (it is) I'd prefer to have done so without Andrew Orlowski poisoning the well with his snide comments before we even get a chance to look at the Paper.

2
0

Boffin's bot spots red light jumpers before they kill

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Stop

Alternatively...

... You could teach people that red light jumping is potentially murderous behaviour and apply appropriate penalties rather than a pathethic slap on the wrist (in this country £60 penalty and 3 points)

It's not exactly rocket science. To quote the Highway Code:

* * * * *

Junctions controlled by traffic lights

175 You MUST stop behind the white ‘Stop’ line across your side of the road unless the light is green. If the amber light appears you may go on only if you have already crossed the stop line or are so close to it that to stop might cause a collision.

[Laws RTA 1988 sect 36 & TSRGD regs 10 & 36]

176 You MUST NOT move forward over the white line when the red light is showing. Only go forward when the traffic lights are green if there is room for you to clear the junction safely or you are taking up a position to turn right. If the traffic lights are not working, treat the situation as you would an unmarked junction and proceed with great care.

[Laws RTA 1988 sect 36 & TSRGD regs 10 & 36]

* * * * *

If you are incapable of obeying these simple rules, you should not be on the road (and, speaking as a cyclist, yes, that *INCLUDES* bicycles too, to forestall the automatic response from car drivers).

0
0

India asks Facebook and friends to screen content

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

'there were things on the internet that...

'... "any normal human being would be offended by".'

You do NOT have the right to not be fucking offended!

And what the hell gives *YOU* the right to decide who is "normal" and who isn't let alone decide that something should be denied to others because *you* consider it offensive?

Once again we see someone attempting to sneak through a restriction of freedom of expression based on the idea that "we don't like this, so you are not allowed to see it".

2
0

UK.gov to require YOU to opt out of data-sharing plan with drug firms

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

@JimmyPage

"Assuming they can get that right"

And that's the worry. Simply taking eg someone's name off the records might not be enough if there are other ways to link patient data together, just as what happened with "anonymised" search details.

But I agree if this can be done then the NHS should be well compensated for the information.

1
0

IPO: Patent laws must change to attract Big Pharma to UK

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Stop

Clinical testing in the UK...

... has diminished because we have introduced all those pesky regulations designed to stop the people from being victims of negligence in trials such as this one:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-559760/Elephant-Man-drug-trial-victim-set-win-2million-payout-losing-toes-fingers.html

It's far better (well, cheaper and more profitable) now for Pharmaceutical companies to do their trials on poor Indian people because the regulations are much more lax, the people are less well informed, there is little transparency on who is actually on the ethics committee which approves the trial, and if something goes wrong they don't have to pay so much compensation...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/07/12/india-clinical-trials_n_896404.html

http://www.who.int/bulletin/volumes/86/8/08-010808/en/index.html

1
0

Navy pays 2x purchase price to keep warship docked for 5 years

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

I'm surprised...

... I expected Lewis to say that we should scrap the Victory, sell it off for firewood and import an historic US ship to put in its place...

12
0

GCHQ code-breaking challenge cracked by Google search

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Coat

I prefer...

... 58008918

The post is required, and must contain letters.

1
0

NASA busts booster booster

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
WTF?

"Wanna buy a RL-10 rocket booster, Guv?

"One careful owner, fell off the back of an Atlas launcher if you know what I mean..."

But seriously, WTF??? How does one of these "go missing" and end up on eBay? It's not as if you can hide it under your coat when you leave work!!

PS And who the hell would be searching on eBay for one of these, let alone bidding on it anyway?

3
0

Toads predict earthquakes: Official

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Facepalm

"to avoid croaking it"

Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear!

1
0

Printed-out dissolving bones, teeth work well in rats

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

Does anyone remember that?

I think so, but I was distracted by a documentary about Catholic High School Girls...

0
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Trollface

I presume...

... the "Spawn of Satan" icon is representative of how your breath will smell...!

1
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge

Yes, but...

... the instant healing is giving a bit of trouble at the moment, so it gets a bit messy!

0
0

Crack GCHQ's code and become the next James Bond

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

"hacked illegally"

Remember kids, it's only illegal when *you* do it!

1
0

Skyrim update makes dragons FLY BACKWARDS

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Happy

I'm flying backwards for Xmas...

... Across the Irish Sea...

(With apologies to Spike Milligan!)

3
1

Kepler spots Earth-sized exoplanet ideal for barbecues

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Happy

So...

... would you call it Lave?

0
0

Siri gets Android rival as Cluzee goes live

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Happy

"What time is it?"

"I've got it writted down on a piece of paper!"

1
0
Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Stop

Cui bono?

"We just need the right information at the right time, which Cluzee intelligently provides"

So their application "intelligently" decides what the "right" information is.

But is that what you *need* to know or what their sponsors and advertising partners decide would be most beneficial to them for you to know...?

1
0

Judge orders search giants: Delist Chanel rip-off merchants

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Boffin

"this request from this judge"

It's not a request, it's an order: "the US district court for Nevada ordered the offending sites be: "De-indexed and/or removed from any search results pages …"

If you really are someone who works with Search Engines, I suggest you list the ones that you work for so people can ensure that you are actually obeying the law, rather than saying "OMG this Judge says we have to de-list them, so we must do that immediately, regardless of due process or any other such legal niceties."

0
0

Hollywood siren invented key phone tech TRUE

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

@bolccg

As the article says, the torpedoes would be dropped by aircraft and since they only need to hit a ship below the waterline, they don't need to run very deep.

3
0

Man uses CAT scanner to copy Stradivarius

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Happy

I've got a Stradivarius and a Rembrandt...

... trouble is Rembrandt made lousy violins and Stradivarius was a terrible painter.

- Tommy Cooper - RIP

5
0

The TARDIS through the ages

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Coat

In the 2007 Children In Need...

... Doctor Who special (The one with Peter Davidson and David Tenant), Davidson's incarnation comments "You've changed the Desktop Theme [...] What is is one? Coral?" :-)

1
0

ESA tests greenhouse gas-measuring lasers

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Alien

"a laser tracking system for greenhouse gases"

Well, that's what they *say* it's for...!

0
0

Samsung gets a win in Oz patent battle

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
FAIL

I hope...

... they bankrupt each other with these constant stupid and petty patent squabbles.

Maybe then we'll see some sanity return to the world as the next generation realise that their predecessors completely broke the system with their greed and work out something sensible.

3
7

Revealed: Full specs on Mars rover's nuclear laser heat ray

Graham Marsden
Silver badge
Coat

"the Martian explorer's beam...

"...can be sustained only for tiny instants of time"

Ah, so it's a 1MW Pulse Laser.

They need to hyperspace to a system with a higher Tech Level and sell off a cargo at a decent profit to at least upgrade to a Beam Laser.

Mine's the one with the "Right on, Commander!" badge...

3
0

Best Buy fires parting shot at Dixons with closing down sale

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

@So...

... Just make sure that a) the purchase value is over £100 and b) you use a credit card (not a debit card) to buy the goods.

That way, under Section 75 of the Consumer Credit Act the card company is jointly and severally liable for the transaction, so if anything goes wrong and Best Buy don't want to play, you can tell your card company to sort it or give you your money back :-)

1
0

Manning to get day in court

Graham Marsden
Silver badge

Matt Bryant

Taxi! Follow those goalposts...

You said "For all you know, he could have got an uninterrupted eight hours every night", but when I cite proof that he did not, you dodge the issue and try to ignore it claiming that I have "debunked" myself. As for it not being sleep deprivation, let me wake you "several times during the night" and we'll see how non-sleep-deprived you feel the next morning (and the next when I do it again...)

You said "I think you'll find the logs were made available to the prosecution", but I can't find any proof of that other than your claim. You could have backed this up with a cite, but instead you again dodge the issue saying "Anything made available to the prosecution is made available to the defence" (I could point to numerous cases of miscarriages of justice where this has not happened, but I expect you to ignore that too)

As for Manning not being taken off suicide watch, your argument appears to be that you consider "cover your ass" to be more important than respecting someone's rights.

Oh and finally I have severe astigmatism. My eyes are -10 dioptres on the right and -11 on the left which technically means I am classed as "partially sighted". Yet I am sitting here, typing this with my glasses on and able to see perfectly clearly, however were I to take my glasses off I would be unable to see anything clearly more than about three inches away.

So again when you claim "there is NO WAY they coulf have lifted his vision to the point where it was acceptable " you demonstrate that you have no idea what you're talking about.

And finally you seem to think that an accusation of treason is sufficient to justify pre-emptively punishing someone before any conviction has been made by a court of law.

As with the other thread, feel free to have the last word.

1
0