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* Posts by Graham Marsden

5068 posts • joined 19 Jan 2007

Do you know a chimp who's feeling doleful? Mid-life crisis, probably

Graham Marsden
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Happy

Re: RE: "50-year-old men ... absconding with waitresses"

I'm 47, I've already got the motorbike, now all I need to do is find the waitress..

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NASA suggests robotic return to the Moon

Graham Marsden
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Happy

Re: Target...

"Schroedinger basin" where there may or may not be a cat...

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Restaurateur jailed for customer sex profile revenge plan

Graham Marsden
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Re: Customer from hell. . .

"Customer from hell"? For asking that they leave olives out of the meal and then behing unhappy with the staff's attitude? Do the words "Customer Service" not mean anything to you??

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Author of '80s classic The Hobbit didn't know game was a hit

Graham Marsden
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Coffee/keyboard

@rurwin

You have just caused me to laugh helplessly for about the last five minutes!!

:-)

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Reefer madness blasts pot machine maker's stock sky high

Graham Marsden
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"legalizing the stuff actually cuts demand"

And that's all we *really* need to know to stop the stupid waste of time, money and resources on the nonsensical and unwinnable "War on Drugs" that too many grandstanding politicians have forced on us!

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Curiosity latest: MARTIAN DUST DEVILS assail prowling robot rover

Graham Marsden
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Alien

What's that noise...?

Sounds like Ulla! Ulla!

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How can UK TV product placement do better, asks report

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

Brand awareness...

.... != desire to purchase that brand.

I'm aware of lots of brands, but that doesn't mean that when I want to buy something I'm going to purchase something from it because I've seen it being used by someone on TV.

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US petitions Obama for better policing of its mega-cities

Graham Marsden
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Re: Hmmm

Six months, creep!

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What happened to comics for kids? Hell, what happened to COMICS?

Graham Marsden
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@Vic: Re: I remember...

I'm open to sensible offers for the complete collection...

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Graham Marsden
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I remember...

... buying the first edition of 2000AD back in 1977 (along with Battle and Warlord) and seeing the teaser pic of Judge Dredd. Unfortunately as it was shown from the front with him on his Lawmaster it looked like some massively fat Southern USA Sheriff and I thought it would be dire...

... fortunately I was wrong!

I've been reading it ever since and although it's been through some bad times and had some duff stories and characters, overall it's been absolutely incredible.

Although I may at some point switch to the digital version because storing the complete collection from Prog 1 to the present is taking up a lot of shelf space...!!!

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Is that a truncheon in your trousers, officer, or ... an antenna, you say?

Graham Marsden
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Alert

Re: WTF stands for...

A Ridiculous Made-up acrOnym that yoU Really have to Stretch for...!

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Sex offenders need internet access, judge rules

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

Re: @Dire Criti¢ and wowfood...

Oh dear, Dire Criti¢, the more you protest that you say you value Human Rights the more you reveal that you don't understand them.

Human Rights are for *all* humans, you do not "protect" one person's rights by taking away those rights from someone else. History shows time and again the tragic results that stem from that sort of mentality where someone who is the "wrong" race or the "wrong" colour or follows the "wrong" religion or thinks "wrong" thoughts or behaves in the "wrong" way is deprived of their Rights because the State thinks that that will make the world a better place.

You might like to live in that world, but I prefer one where no person has Rights above another.

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Graham Marsden
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Boffin

Re: @Dire Criti¢ and wowfood...

Yes, Dire Criti¢, it's very simple to understand that you don't have the slightest clue what Human Rights are actually about.

"Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it" - George Satayana.

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Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

@Dire Criti¢ and wowfood...

Ah, so you're two the type of people who think that Human Rights should only apply to peope we *like*...

... The Daily Mail comment pages are over there -->

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Brits admit to using mobile phones during sex - and not in a good way

Graham Marsden
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Happy

Re: survey bias

I think my customers might disagree...!

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Top prosecutor warns troll-hunting cops not to choke courts

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

You do not have the right...

...to not be fucking offended!!

To quote Stephen Fry: 'It's now very common to hear people say, "I'm rather offended by that", as if that gives them certain rights. It's no more than a whine. It has no meaning, it has no purpose, it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. "I'm offended by that." Well, so fucking what?'

But now, it seems, we have idiots decided that they *do* have the right to not be offended and they're going to use (or abuse) the law to shut up people who say things they don't like!

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BBC places news chief and her deputy beyond use in Savile row

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

"Licence Tax" was Re: Free Money ?

A couple of figures to think about:

BBC licence fee for the year: £145.50, no adverts. Annual subscription to the Daily Mail: £214.24.

Which of these is really worth the money paid for it?

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Google hit with $AUD200k defamation damages

Graham Marsden
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Devil

"The sites in Google's search results...

"...are controlled by those sites' webmasters, not by Google"

Howls of derisive laughter, Bruce!

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One in four don't clean their stinky old browsers - especially Firefoxers

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

Try...

... Secunia PSI. It regularly scans your system and checks for updates, many of which can auto-install.

Not hard.

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Man, 19, cuffed after burning Remembrance poppy pic is Facebooked

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

Meanwhile...

... Nick Griffin of the BNP makes a homophobic post about the gay couple who were discriminated against by a B&B owner and posts their address, seemingly calling on his supporters to stage a demo outside their house, yet all he gets is a brief ban from Twitter and the comment removed

#levelplayingfield???

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China blocks all Google services as new leader anointed

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

Re: legitimate?

To quote from one of those articles: "[The Chinese Government] see the state as the embodiment and guardian of Chinese civilisation. Its most important responsibility - bar none - is maintaining the unity of the country."

No, what they see is that their power and authority (and no doubt lots of very nice perks) come from keeping the lid on anything that might undermine their power, because they've got a really cushy number and don't want to lose it which is what will happen when their general populace realise exactly how corrupt their entire system is.

They may throw the occasional sacrificial lamb out when someone does something so egregiously wrong that they can't simply cover it up, but that's just the tip of the iceberg.

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Astroboffins spot smiley face on Mercury

Graham Marsden
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Happy

There's one of these...

... on Mars.

Ask Dr Manhattan...

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Judge drops TV ad-block block: So how will anyone pay for TV now?

Graham Marsden
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Re: "in the expectation that...

"Muting commercials could be the end of TV as we know it!"

To quote from an episode of Max Headroom:

Janie Crane: "An off switch?"

Metrocop: "She'll get years for that. Off switches are illegal!"

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Graham Marsden
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FAIL

"in the expectation that...

"...viewers will sit through the ads that pay for the programmes"

ITYM "the ads that pay their over-inflated salaries and bonuses which they got for paying over-inflated prices for sports coverage..."

Oh and HERE IS A COMMERCIAL BREAK!

Why do the idiots think that boosting the LOUDNESS on commercials is going to make someone *more* likely to buy a product? If you've been watching a quiet programme and then someone comes on SHOUTING at you to buy something, what are you going to do? Buy it? Or mute/ skip/ go and make a cup of tea until the idiot has gone away...?

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Tomb-raid boffins find golden hoard of the warrior Thracians

Graham Marsden
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Happy

Re: I am Spartacus!

@ I ain't Spartacus...

Make up your mind!!

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At last, a bionic arm that passes the Beer, Egg and Looks Cool tests

Graham Marsden
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Happy

I'm just remembering...

... a certain incident involving Howard Wolowitz...

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Google launches third-world mobile web land grab

Graham Marsden
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Devil

So what's wrong with...

... a "Google-Free Zone"?

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Japanese car nuts build racecars powered by shouting 'Brrrm! Brrrrrm!'

Graham Marsden
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Happy

How about....

... if you yell "Go SPEED!"

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Graham Marsden
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Happy

Re: How About Dog-Fights?

ITYM "Eeeeoooow dakka-dakka-dakka!"

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Habitable HEAVY GRAVITY WORLD found just 42 light-years away

Graham Marsden
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Happy

"the dangerous Bandersnatch"

I think you mean "Frumious Bandersnatch"!

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Wave of the Future? Smartphone NFC used to buy stuff ONLINE

Graham Marsden
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Unhappy

"The critical question now is...

"...if handset-secured payments will incur the lower "card present" charge, which would certainly result in very rapid adoption by retailers."

And reduce the Card Handling Companies' profits. So somehow I doubt this will happen...

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Widow lost savings in Facebook stock, sues all concerned for $1.9m

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

The value of your investment...

... can go down as well as seriously down!

Any financial advisor would have told her that putting all of your eggs in one basket is not a good idea, that's why you keep a diversified portfolio so if one part of it takes a dive the rest of it is still there.

Maybe there was sharp practice, maybe it was illegal, but what she did was *certainly* stupid.

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Bird of Prey: 1980s IT on on the small screen

Graham Marsden
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This was an excellent show!

No beeping noises as a screen prints out characters at the speed of a teletype, no "Enhance!", no derring do and gunfights, just an ordinary bloke who gets caught up in extraordinary events and decides that he's not going to be pushed around or act as one of the "little people"...

"Hibou et Minou allèrent à la mer.

"Dans une barque peinte en jaune-canari..."

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Who needs flying cars when we can robotically sort Skittles?

Graham Marsden
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Alert

"If you insist to The Reg...

"...that you've never separated a bag of Skittles – or, for that matter, their chocolaty analog, M&M's – into piles segregated by their purple, green, orange, red, and yellow hues, well, we simply won't believe you."

Well I haven't, mostly because they don't taste as nice as Smarties! (Which I may have sorted into colours, but that's my business...)

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Classic game 'Elite' returns … on Kickstarter

Graham Marsden
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Re: The POWER of The Reg

"Did anyone here genuinely make it all the way to Elite?"

Yes, but only because of the bug in the original BBC Micro version where you would get ranking for shooting up Police ships!

So I'd sit outside a space station, give it a zap with my military laser, then blast loads of Vipers as they came out :-)

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Graham Marsden
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Ok, great, but...

... please make sure there's plenty of things to do after you've done all the trading and taxi runs to get your "Iron Ass", photographed enemy bases (or blown them up) and done the assassination missions etc.

What Elite always lacked was long-term goals apart from getting to Elite, there should be more extended missions like the original Constrictor and Thargoid ones, otherwise boredom will set in again...

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Slideshow: A History of First-person Shooters in 20 Games

Graham Marsden
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What about Maze...

... from Acornsoft on the BBC Micro in 1982?

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Welsh council's unused mountain of 2,400 laptops

Graham Marsden
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Re: lets see someone sacked for this.

Lol! That's a good one...!

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Graham Marsden
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Re: I'll take em off their hands...

I'll split them with you 50/50 :-)

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Verizon staff arrested for stealing customer's nude pics

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

@Rampant Spaniel

It never ceases to amaze me how little respect some people have for others' privacy.

If you were helping a friend move house would you have a good rummage through their stuff whilst doing so? No? So would you do it to a complete stranger? Would you then tell take copies or tell other people about it?

Just because you can does *NOT* mean you should.

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MIT boffin's algorithm foresees Twitter's trendy future

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

How about...

... #whogivesashit?

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Gamma ray telescope uses 'blazars' to map GLOWING COSMIC FOG

Graham Marsden
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Alien

"This might be one of the reasons no extraterrestrials have yet dropped round for a chat."

Apart from those bloody teasers...

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We don’t talk any more... on the commute

Graham Marsden
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Re: Nicely put

Go into a shop that sells motorbike equipment and buy yourself a decent set of earplugs! :-)

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Greek journo who published list of Swiss bank account holders cleared

Graham Marsden
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Coat

Tex evasion?

Sure thing, pardner!

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Bond fans: Test your 007 trivia, now!

Graham Marsden
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Re: Sir

Ditto and ditto!

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African kids learn to read, hack Android on OLPC fondleslab

Graham Marsden
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Joke

What's the Ethiopian equivalent...

... of a 419 Scam...?

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Russia launches internet blacklist to protect the kiddies

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

Well there's a surprise...

... NOT!

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ISS 'nauts pop out to fix a radiator... in SPACE

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

"In Space"...?

No, really? And I thought they'd left the ISS to fix one just down the road from me...

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5 Tokyo devs cuffed over 'The Movie' Android app scam

Graham Marsden
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Coat

"Gullible idiots...

"...The Movie!"

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SMARTPHONES make TEENS have SEX with STRANGERS

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

So...

... this has nothing to do with the lamentable state of sex education in the USA and the influence of the Moral Minority who think that promoting abstinence whilst ensuring ignorance is actually a good way of preventing teen pregnancies...

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