* Posts by Graham Marsden

6562 posts • joined 19 Jan 2007

FLYING PIG crash-lands in Utah: Rider survives, bacon saved

Graham Marsden
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Ah...

.... Bootnotes!

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Hacking Team: Oh great, good job, guys ... now the TERRORISTS have our zero-day exploits

Graham Marsden
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Childcatcher

"Our tools are now in the hands of terrorists and extortionists."

They forgot to include paedophiles and drug dealers...

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Ditch crappy landlines and start reading Twitter, 999 call centres told

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

Dear children...

... if there is a fire or similar emergency:

1) Get out of the building

2) Phone 999

3) THEN you can post it on social media...!

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Osbo PRINTS first Tory budget in 19 years with his BARE HANDS

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

"We should cut the deficit at the same pace as we did in the last parliament"

Err, this is the same George Osborne who intended to have *eliminated* the deficit by 2015?

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Graham Marsden
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Pirate

Yes, let's all praise IDS...

...the man whose department has instigated benefit sanctions against people who have been declared as "fit for work" and who then, inconveniently, died not long after.

And, of course, that same department who is now asking terminally ill people when the expect to die before they can claim the benefits they're due.

Clearly he is just improving the gene pool by eliminating the weakest in society...

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Lizard Squad kid bandit who did 50 THOUSAND HACKS dodges cooler stint

Graham Marsden
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Megaphone

Re: "Who fancies a lynch mob?"

Of course! Twenty years in chokey will teach him the error of his ways and be a warning to anyone else that building systems with crap security and then blaming someone else for when it all goes tits-up isn't a crime...

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'Real' vampires reluctant to 'come out of the coffin' to social workers – barmy prof

Graham Marsden
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Coat

"So what's with...

"... all the crucifixes already?"

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Adam Smith was right about that invisible hand, you know

Graham Marsden
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Happy

@chris swain - Re: @LucreLout - Can you guess what I'm going to say Tim...?@WTF?

> you've obviously driven him to distraction.

Actually he drove me to type - site:theregister.co.uk "matt bryant" "lucrelout" - into a search engine to see if his claim of not having any idea who Matt is was credible, but, well, to him that's "disturbing stalking"...

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Graham Marsden
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FAIL

Re: @LucreLout - Can you guess what I'm going to say Tim...?

You know, LucreLout, I *really* wasn't going to post in this thread again, but then I read THIS

> Who on earth is Matt Bryant?

Seriously, LL? You've been posting on The Register since June 2014 and you have *NO* idea who Matt Bryant is?

Here, let me remind you of just some of the threads where you both commented, indeed, in some of them in the *same* sub-thread:

http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/3/2014/07/08/christopher_wilson_students_refusal_to_give_up_crypto_keys_jail_sentence_ripa/#c_2237226

http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/1/2015/03/03/snowden_us_return_russia_leak/#c_2455462

http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/1/2015/02/17/privacy_international_investigatory_powers_tribunal/#c_2441569

http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/1/2015/02/17/privacy_international_investigatory_powers_tribunal/#c_2441569

http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/3/2014/12/14/inequality_poverty_living_standards_not_same_thing/

http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/3/2014/07/16/british_cops_cuff_660_paedophile_suspects/#c_2245434

http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/3/2014/07/03/nsa_xkeyscore_stasi_scandal/#c_2233537

I don't use the Fail icon lightly (unlike some), but this in this case, LL, yep, Epic Fail.

PS Of course I have no doubt now LL is going to try to dig himself out of this hole by vociferously claiming that he was joking or being sarcastic or something else clever. Methinks he doth protest too much...

Have fun, LucreLout, I'm sure I'll see you in another thread soon.

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Graham Marsden
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Re: @LucreLout - Can you guess what I'm going to say Tim...?

You know, LucreLout, sometimes I have to wonder if you're a Matt Bryant Sock Puppet, since you and he have the same debating tactics of shifting the goalposts or insulting people's intelligence to avoid conceding a point.

Rowing boats? Yes, they fit in the same general classification of craft as Luxury Yachts, but I don't think the skills needed to build them are quite the same, are they?

"You're either ignorant of your own position or lack the vocabulary to express it coherently." Or perhaps you just don't want to listen to anything that doesn't fit in with your narrow mind-set.

> Political compass has the Conservatives being more authoritarian than labour, which is patently untrue.

Ah, now we see LucreLout's true colours (as if they weren't obvious). I have no love for Labour, but at least they didn't try to get rid of the Human Rights Act and replace it with an act which says "You get the rights *we* say you can have, provided you're someone we like"..A pox on both their houses.

> You seem not to understand that the Prince hasn't given the fortune to his staff via pay rises. In fact, as far as is publicly known information, he hasn't given them a payrise at all.

And there go those goalposts again...

"The massive handout, estimated to total more than $32 billion, includes a two-month basic stipend for all state employees, soldiers, students, and pensioners, as well as generous grants to various professional associations, and literary and sports clubs."

Fine, if it makes you happy, it's a bonus, not a "pay rise". Feeling better now?

> Employees get paid at replacement level salaries. [...] you certainly seem to understand little of how capitalism functions in the real world.

No, LucreLout, I understand perfectly well how capitalism *can* function and does, indeed, function in the minds of those who think that labour is simply another resource which needs to be chiseled down to the lowest possible level to make it as cheap as it can be in order to maximise profits.

I'm simply saying that this is not actually an absolute necessity. I'm saying that those at the top who are paying themselves nice big salaries and bonuses shouldn't forget the ones at the bottom of the ladder who are actually doing the work that *earns* that money and that maybe paying them, at the least, a Living Wage instead of the government mandated Minimum Wage might actually make things better and, who knows, they might even work harder because you get more from loyalty than fear.

If you cannot understand this, then I pity you.

Now feel free to get the last word in, then you can go back to counting your money and seeing how good that makes you feel.

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Graham Marsden
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Re: @LucreLout - Can you guess what I'm going to say Tim...?

> Gathering all of that into one place is certainly a skill too, which is why the business owner gets rewarded. The employees are self evidently taking less risk with their capital

Neatly missing the point that, as said, it *takes* money to *make* money. If the employees *had* the money, they could start up on their own, but they haven't, so they can't.

> Well that certainly qualifies you to..... Well, I'm not sure what.

It doesn't "qualify" me to do anything. It just shows that your (not very implicit) sneer that I "understand the least about how the game is played" is wrong.

> And its worth bearing in mind that IT contracting isn't running a business in any real sense

Who is an IT Contractor? Not me, so another point fails.

> Equality of opportunity is what really matters, and you'll never get that between the only child of a millionaire [...] do we beat pretty people in the face to equalise their looks with those of us with a visage that appears to have been kicked by an epilleptic donkey

Yadda, yadda, yadda.

Please, LucreLout, spare me the ridiculously silly Straw Man arguments. I've never said anything of the sort, nor would I, so please don't imply that I have because *you* are ignorant of my position.

> Why then are those of you on the left so obsessed with other peoples money?

Oops! LucreLout gets it wrong again. I am only on the "Left" from your point of view. On the scale of http://politicalcompass.org/ I come in at -0.3 on the Left/Right axis and -7.75 on the Authoritarian/ Libertarian axis, so I'm hardly some left-wing, pinko, bleeding-heart liberal who thinks that the only way to equalise opportunity is to tax the rich and give it all the the poor.

Have you seen the recent story about the Saudi Prince who has just given $32 billion to charities and government employees? Apparently that has inspired a number of other Saudi business leaders to give bonuses to their employees. Similarly Abramovich has decided that Chelsea is going to not just pay staff the Minimum Wage, but the Living Wage and other football clubs are doing the same.

Why? Perhaps it's because they've realised that they don't actually *need* many millions or even a few billion in the bank and that paying people what they're worth, rather than only what they *must* pay them is actually a better way of doing business.

So which is better, saying "Screw you workers, I'm alright Jack" or developing a conscience and not trying to hog it all for yourself?

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Graham Marsden
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@LucreLout - Re: Can you guess what I'm going to say Tim...?

> All the while the workers will be doing their damndest to ensure they get paid the absolute maximum for their effort in building the boat.

Except that, as has already been pointed out, unless there's a situation of almost full employment which forces employers to offer better wages, they can say "This is what we're paying, take it or leave it. If you don't take it, someone else will".

> I tend to find those that are the loudest critics of capitalism understand the least about how the game is played.

Really? Perhaps I should point out that I've been running my own business for over 20 years and got an A-Level in Economics many years ago...

But the fundamental point that *you* are discounting is that it *takes* money to make money. The first rule of the game is that you need a stake to get into the game.

What is stopping those workers setting up their own company? Answer: A big lump of capital to afford to buy premises, a boat yard, raw materials, pay labour, etc etc etc. And if you say "they can get a bank loan" I'll ask "who are the banks likely to loan to? The workers who have little in reserve or someone who's already got a few million in the bank?"

The fundamental issue with capitalism, socialism, communism or anything else is that they run into the problem known as "Human Nature" and unless you make sure that the game a) has rules and b) people are made to play *by* the rules, you will always end up with a situation of increasing inequality.

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Graham Marsden
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Re: Can you guess what I'm going to say Tim...?

> If you read up a bit you'll see that that's the bit that I think that Marx got right.....

Yes, Tim, but again you ignore the elephant. You quote: "by their purchase of things to consume they do spread that income, that wealth around" and "that's what then raises wages. And that's the invisible hand that benefits."

Except that the wealth doesn't get spread around, does it? The wages don't go up, do they? Or, at least, only the barest minimum possible. Meanwhile the rest of the wealth gets concentrated upwards, so who *actually* really benefits?

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Graham Marsden
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Can you guess what I'm going to say Tim...?

Once again we have an article from TW which, whilst accurate and informative, manages to ignore the elephant in the room:

> he must have, by definition, have spread the value of that consumption, thus allowing them to consume that amount, among the people who provided him with the yacht.

Yes, that's very true, BUT, of course, the value of that consumption is NOT spread evenly, is it?

> if he's paid £1.5bn for that yacht then obviously there's some yacht builders somewhere who now have £1.5bn in spondoolies, and that's been used to pay the workers who built the yacht, pay the workers who made the steel, that made the yacht and so on and on.

How much of that £1.5bn goes to pay the workers who *built* the yacht? How much of the money that paid for the steel goes to the workers who *made* the steel? Isn't it actually the case that (with a few exceptions) the people who got that £1.5bn will be doing their damndest to ensure that they pay the absolute minimum they can get away with to get the work done (and giving as little as possible away in dividends) ensuring that they manage to keep as much of that money for themselves as possible.

> it's capital added to labour which makes labour more productive and that's what then raises wages. And that's the invisible hand that benefits.

Really? Unless you have a situation approaching full employment where the workers have sufficient power, you get the result where the employers can say "You do what jobs we want for the money we're going to pay and if you don't want to do that, we'll find someone else somewhere else who's cheaper or more desperate who *will* do the job. So take our wages or starve!"

Can you guess what I'm going to say? It starts with Cui...

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The modest father of SMS, who had much to be modest about

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

"Pizza had nothing to do with SMS"

And, to emphasise this, El Reg has a picture of someone, with a phone, eating pizza.

Right, so glad to get that sorted out...

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Han Solo to get solo prequel flick in 2018, helmed by LEGO men

Graham Marsden
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Alert

"[...] his methods for making the Kessel run in 12 parsecs."

Apparently (according to a friend of mine who is a total Star Wars geek and who has told me about this in excruciatingly tedious detail) Kessel is surrounded by a cluster of black holes and most ships have to take the "long way round" to avoid them, but the Falcon is such a nippy ship that it could dodge between them and shorten the route (or something like that, my brain may have switched off somewhere along the line...)

Or, of course, this could simply be RetCon because George Lucas didn't know that a parsec is a measure of distance, not time...

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Security gurus deliver coup de grace to US govt's encryption backdoor demands

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

The short version...

... the Government doesn't trust us, but they expect us to trust them...

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How a Cali court ruling could force a complete rethink of search results

Graham Marsden
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@choleric - Re: Are you aware...

Are you after a job as an El Reg sub-editor?

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Graham Marsden
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Re: Irritating

The question is whether someone is *specifically* looking for an MTM watch or something that *looks* like a military design watch and there's really no way to tell that.

If there are lots of watches of similar design and someone has seen a friend/ review/ advert for MTM they might go into a shop and say "I want one of those MTM watches" but then find the price is too high or they don't quite like the look of what they're offered or, of course, that the shop doesn't stock that particular brand at which point the assistant can say "We also have these..."

As such, *provided* Amazon or whoever says something like "We cannot find any results that match what you're looking for, but we have these ones instead..." I would not have a problem.

If, on the other hand, they say "Here's what you're looking for" and it's necessary to waste time trying to refine your search enquiry or look through several pages to discover that they don't actually have that particular brand, then that would be a problem.

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Ford's 400,000-car recall could be the tip of an auto security iceberg

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

And, as usual...

... security takes second place (or even lower) to marketing...

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Google hits TurboFan button on Chrome's JavaScript engine

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

it one day hopes it can rip out all the old compiler code and replace it with something better.

Preferably something that *isn't* Javas$$t!

Icon because... oh, you'll figure it out ;-)

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Why the BBC is stuffing free Micro:bit computers into schoolkids' satchels

Graham Marsden
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Re: Year 7 = 11 years old

> one of the early ideas mooted for the prototype was as a wearable

I don't think it will be long before someone comes up with a case that will allow you to substitute the 2xAAA batteries for a button cell and sell it as a Mod.

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Graham Marsden
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Happy

Does it run BBC Basic?

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US dominates net-security patents, China, Canada and Oz on the advance

Graham Marsden
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Pint

@Vic - Re: And how many...

I don't know whether to downvote you for having done (or been made to do) such things or upvote you out of sympthy...

... so have a beer instead!

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Graham Marsden
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Re: And how many...

> You shouldn't be able to patent something that has been already patented, nor something that is already out there either.

FTFY! (Now let's fix the US Patent Office...)

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Graham Marsden
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Meh

And how many...

... of those patents are actually original or inventive and aren't simply attempts to patent the wheel or something that someone else has already patented...?

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Home Office kept schtum on more than 30 data breaches last year

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

Gods forbid...

... that our Government should tell us anything that would make us think that they can't be trusted with all our data...

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Behold the mighty Swiss SPACE JUNK NOSHER PODULE

Graham Marsden
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Coat

It wasn't Drax, it was Blofeld!

Mine's the one in the secret extinct volcano lair...

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Pluto probe brain OVERLOAD: Titsup New Horizons explained

Graham Marsden
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Coat

Re: Slam code

Well they might find their phone service switched to another provider without their knowledge and end up with a massive bill...

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THIS MEANS WAR between USA and Japan! GIANT ROBOT WAR

Graham Marsden
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Trollface

Re: Robot Jox

Perhaps they just have better taste in Giant Robot movies...

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BPI fiddles with music consumption figures while revenues burn

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

"how do you measure an album's sales...

"...when a lot of your audience is streaming, or has YouTube"

The same way you calculate how much "piracy" is costing the music industry: You make up a large figure, multiply it by another large monetary amount, then get the media to publish it unquestioningly...

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The Scientific Secrets of Doctor Who

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

The Doctor is a hero...

... so much so that El Reg used the Hero Image twice!

(Or was it just some sort of wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey thing?)

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Giddy Google Glass gazers, beware! FCC filing obscures view on new gadget

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

Is that pronounced....

.... AAARGH!!!

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Will rising CO2 damage the world's oceans? NOT SO MUCH – new boffinry

Graham Marsden
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Re: Is it an indication...

If that's the case, then there's a whole lot more of us who have also reading El Reg for too long...

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Graham Marsden
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Boffin

" will probably not be disrupted"

Oh well *that's* ok then!

Lewis has told us (again) that it's nothing to be concerned about, so we can stop worrying our pretty little heads!

Of course the fact is that we're still using more and more energy, so using it in more efficient ways (which, BTW, has nothing to do with living in yurts or wearing hair shirts or any other of the usual BS) will a) lower our emissions of CO2 and b) give us time to actually get fusion and similar generation methods working properly so it's win-win all round.

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Biologists gasp at lemur's improbably colossal bollocks

Graham Marsden
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Trollface

To everyone who's about to comment:

We don't believe you!

(ADDENDUM - Unless your name is Buster Gonad, of course)

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UK TV is getting worse as younglings shun the BBC et al, says Ofcom

This post has been deleted by a moderator

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

Re: As a 20 something

> All you gits wanting other people to be forced to pay for your preferred viewing need to get a grip on reality

How do you think all those companies who advertise on TV pay for it? We are *ALL* paying for it because the cost of the advertising is built into what we pay for their products!

In your "15 years time" future when you have a choice of watching 47 different versions of Britain's Got the X-Factor Coming Strictly Through a Hole in the Wall on Ice, maybe you'll realise then what you've lost.

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Graham Marsden
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@Irongut - Re: "more adverts"

What's an advert? I don't see them when I fast forward through the breaks as I'm watching stuff I've recorded on my Sky+ Box.

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Engineers 3D-print ROBOT SEAHORSE, then SMASH it with rubber mallets

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

So: If you want to know how it works...

... hit it with a hammer...?

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Self/Less: Crap science, eyebrow acting, and immortality for the 1%

Graham Marsden
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Flame

"if Albright had managed to grow bodies in a lab...

"... the Nobel Prize committee would have been beating down his door with honors and funding."

Or fundamentalist religious nutters with torches and pitchforks...

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Angry Austrian takes a hit in David and Goliath Facebook battle

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

"the proper place for litigation would be in Ireland or California, where Facebook is headquartered"

In other news, Mark Zuckerberg has just announced that Facebook will be establishing a new headquarters on Mars...

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Boffin: Will I soon be able to CLONE a WOOLLY MAMMOTH? YES. Should I? Hell NO

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

Could I do it...?

- Yes.

Should I do it?

- Probably not.

Am I going to do it anyway?

- Of course!

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German army fights underground Nazi war machine hidden in Kiel pensioner's cellar

Graham Marsden
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@Tim Jenkins - Re: Must have been an interesting sight

> What is a 'Nazi tank', anyway?

It's a description by someone who doesn't know (or can't be bothered to know [cough]Quentin Tarantion[/cough]) that there was a difference between the German people as a whole and the Nazi Party and its sympathisers.

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Mastercard facial recog-ware will unlock your money using SELFIES

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

Re: Yet another clueless "security" spokes-head.

> That process is designed to thwart obvious attacks where attackers could use a still image of a victim

So, let's see: How about I get a picture of someone, wear it as a mask so my eyes are looking through the eye-holes and then blink when it says?

Hmm, of course that's not obvious, is it???

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NASA invents super-SMACK, hallucinates WHOLE STAR SYSTEMS

Graham Marsden
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Thumb Up

SMACK

Certainly better than some of the contrived Acronyms out there!

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This box beams cafes' Wi-Fi over 4kms so you can surf in obscurity

Graham Marsden
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Thumb Down

Re: Using 900MHz...

The other problem with 2.4GHz is that it's susceptible to interference from duff microwave ovens.

I used to have a Sender so I could watch TV from my Sky Box in another room, but for several minutes a day I'd have to stop whilst my neighbour cooked their tea :(

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Protecting users against advanced threats and the human factor

Graham Marsden
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"when you try to build foolproof internet security, users can manage to break it in minutes"

"It is impossible to make a system foolproof, because fools are so ingenious" - Corollary to Murphy's Law.

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Chair legs it from UK govt smart meter installation programme

Graham Marsden
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Unhappy

"Was Baroness McDonagh pushed or did she jump?"

Either way, I bet she had a gold-plated lifeboat...

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NHS IT failures mount as GP data system declared unfit for purpose

Graham Marsden
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... probably because they have no idea what they actually *need* it to do.

Oh, sure, they've got some vague ideas of "wouldn't it be good if it did this..." and, naturally, the Government Approved Contractors will say "Sure, no problems" whilst laughing up their sleeves, knowing full well that the Government has no idea how to write a proper contract anyway, so when they start changing the specification or adding new bells and whistles and it all starts to fall apart as the Contractors say "sorry, can't be done", they'll be in line for another £x million and the whole silly thing goes round and round...

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