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* Posts by Graham Marsden

4954 posts • joined 19 Jan 2007

Kaspersky backpedals on 'done nothing wrong, nothing to fear' blather

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

"There is almost to zero chance that you would be of interest to any secret service on the planet."

"a draft article by an independent author"

Matt! When did you start writing for Kaspersky?!

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Mozilla's 'Tiles' ads debut in new Firefox nightlies

Graham Marsden
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Meh

"only if you turn off all Tiles"

Tiles? What are they?

Oh, yeah, those things that I turned off as soon as they were introduced, so when I open up a new tab I get a nice clean blank screen which I can fill with a web page I *choose* from my Bookmarks list.

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One step closer to ROBOT BUTLERS: Dyson flashes vid of VACUUM SUCKER bot

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

They may make good cleaners...

... but they make crap videos!

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Top beak: UK privacy law may be reconsidered because of social media

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

"It undermines the rule of law if laws are unenforceable"

ORLY?

Odd, because that doesn't seem to have stopped the last few governments from passing all sorts of unenforceable laws which look good in the media...

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China building SUPERSONIC SUBMARINE that travels in a BUBBLE

Graham Marsden
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@uffish - Re: Star Wars (The Reagan version).

> Sounds just like the American wheeze to destabilize Soviet Russia, same hype...

ITYM "Same Ret-Con", claiming after the event that it was all a clever and sneaky plan (and not a whole load of money pi$$ed away on pie-in-the-sky unworkable boondoggles...)

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Graham Marsden
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Coat

Can I just say....

Standby to launch SkyDiver!

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Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

@AC - Re: Daft concept.

> Not Howard Arneson, which was his actual name?

Ah, but only jake got to call him Dale!

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6 Obvious Reasons Why Facebook Will Ban This Article (Thank God)

Graham Marsden
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@diodesign - Re: @AC - Orlowski articles as ads

> Play the ball, not the hack, etc.

If the articles from certain hacks were marked as "Opinion" pieces (which, frankly, is what a lot of them actually are) I think readers would appreciate El Reg's candour.

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Graham Marsden
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@AC - Re: Orlowski articles as ads

Re: your point 2) - in the past, he has actually moderated (and edited!) comments on his articles himself.

Conflict of interest? What's that...?

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Experimental hypersonic SUPERMISSILE destroyed 4 SECONDS after US launched it

Graham Marsden
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Mushroom

@Phil Endecott - Re: Re "which could potentially bypass missile defences"

> Read "The Dead Hand" by David E Hoffman.

Watch "Dr Strangelove - Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love The Bomb"!

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Wearables market set to EXPLODE... Wait, is that a STRAP-ON chair?

Graham Marsden
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Re: The wrist computer market has grown by almost 700 per cent this year

The number of comments on that post has just grown by 100%!

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Graham Marsden
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Happy

Re: As opposed...

If you want one of those, I have them in my Affordable Leather Products range, suitable for ordinary and swivel chairs... ;-)

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The police are WRONG: Watching YouTube videos is NOT illegal

Graham Marsden
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@AC - Re: "there is no criminal offence of watching videos"

> "making" to add to "possession"

Very probably.

Of course the real purpose is just to make it sound better in the media because "making" implies that you actually produced it

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Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

"there is no criminal offence of watching videos"

Erm, there probably is if it falls under Extreme Porn legislation, where simple *possession* is enough to get you banged up...

> the British police now truly believe they have the right to state that something's illegal even when that's not the case:

What is this "now" business? Certain elements of the Police have been decising that someone's a "wrong'un" for years/ decades/ generations now and finding excuses to charge them with "crimes" (see Constable Savage from Not the Nine o'Clock News for details).

I recently was chatting with someone who had been a Police Officer but left because he became so disillusioned with this sort of institutional attitude from some of his colleagues. When he tried to raise the issue with his superiors he was basically told "shut up and let them do their jobs".

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Bright lights, affordable motor: Ford puts LED headlights onto Mondeo

Graham Marsden
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@Da Weezil - Re: D*ckhead Designer requirements

> it illustrates nicely where the muppet manufacturers priorities are.

And the bean counters when you need to replace the whole lens assembly (or even light cluster) if one part of it breaks... Kerching!!

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Graham Marsden
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Meh

Great, maybe...

... this will stop all those idiots who think retro-fitting HIDs to their cars is really clever (instead of being stupid and spraying light all over the place) or the prats who think that fog lamps are running lights and should be left on all the time.

And hopefully it will also mean lights have a longer lifespan, so you get fewer cars driving around with one (or even both!) rear lights out because the owner thinks "meh, it passed its MoT, it's ok" and doesn't even do the simplest basic checks of the road-worthiness of their vehicle...

(Sorry, I can't stop myself laughing cynically at this point)

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Brookhaven boffins boggle at baryons

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

Sounds fascinating...

... even though I didn't understand a word of it! :-)

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Not really very live at all from London - It's the Vulture News videocast

Graham Marsden
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Thumb Up

@ Barry Rueger - Re: Video... not more video....

Hear hear! Or, rather I'd prefer not to hear (or watch) it.

I can read a damn sight faster than someone can speak and I can zip through the text transcript of an hour long "webinar" (ugh, horrible neologism!) in a time substantially shorter than that hour, thus leaving me time to actually do something useful.

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Galileo can't do the fandango: Two Euro GPS nav sats sent into WRONG ORBIT

Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

Wrong orbit? Come on guys, it's not rocket sci...

... erm, ah, sorry, nothing to see here. Move along!

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US Copyright Office rules that monkeys CAN'T claim copyright over their selfies

Graham Marsden
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Re: Monkey speak

Oook!

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Graham Marsden
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So, from another viewpoint...

... if Country X says that software licences are invalid and copyright doesn't apply to them, the USCO would be quite happy to tell US Businesses that people in Country X can quite legitimately copy their software and not pay for it...?

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Echopraxia scores 'diamond cutter' on the sci-fi hardness scale

Graham Marsden
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Coat

Re: I don't think the coriolis effect is that hard science

Remember that Babylon 5 had a baseball field, which meant that *every* ball would be a curve ball...!

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Don't even THINK about copyright violation, says Indian state

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

"In a move that has garnered little notice beyond India"

And El Reg, it seems...

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Chinese hackers spied on investigators of Flight MH370 - report

Graham Marsden
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@Destroy All Monsters

> why is anything in such an investigation "classified"?

Because (as was later revealed) the Malaysians had tracked the plane with military rather than civilian radars (which have much less coverage) and they probably don't want the Chinese (or anyone else) knowing their surveillance and monitoring capabilities.

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Hear ye, young cyber warriors of the realm: GCHQ wants you

Graham Marsden
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Coat

Ensor?

Didn't he create Orac...?

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Hello, police, El Reg here. Are we a bunch of terrorists now?

Graham Marsden
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WTF?

@Charles Manning - "Like any other manufacturer/service provider, they sell what the punters buy"

No, they sell what the suckers will believe.

For example the 2010 Tory Party Manifesto said "We will stop the forced closure of A&E and maternity wards, so that people have better access to local services, and give mothers a real choice over where to have their baby, with NHS funding following their decisions."

But in 2012 the Tories attempt to force the closure of the A&E and maternity ward at Lewisham Hospital, however, fortunately, they were defeated in the courts.

That's just *one* small example of what lies politicians will peddle to get people to vote for them, knowing full well that, once they're in power, they can do what the hell they like for the next four or five years before they peddle a *new* set of lies (and bribe people with their own money) to get them to vote for them again.

This makes a total mockery of the concept of democracy.

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Germany 'accidentally' snooped on John Kerry and Hillary Clinton

Graham Marsden
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Meh

Re: Marsbarbrain JeffyDoh Aww that's just unlucky

And so we get back to the same old, same old...

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Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

Re: JeffyDoh Aww that's just unlucky

Oh dear, Matt, and you were doing *SO* well, right up until the last paragraph where you had to get in a dig at *someone* on the Left...

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'Leccy racer whacks petrols in Oz race

Graham Marsden
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FAIL

@jake - Re: That's nice.

I bet you told Wilbur and Orville that they were wasting their time too...

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Kate Bush: Don't make me HAVE CONTACT with your iPHONE

Graham Marsden
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@MacroRodent - Re: " there is no way to crunch the disk into the film scanner"

Does your scanner have an attachment to allow you to scan Slides? If so, you can cut the negatives off the disc and then create a "frame" to hold them in the slide attachment.

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Graham Marsden
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Facepalm

@AC "I don't whine about it on an IT tech news site, from an anonymous account."

I think another Irony Detector has just exploded...

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Naughty NSA was so drunk on data it forgot collection rules

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

"even the NSA didn't know the limits"

ITYM: "even the NSA carefully didn't look carefully at what the limits were because they wanted plausible deniability"

FTFY.

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Hollywood star Robin Williams dies of 'suspected suicide' at 63

Graham Marsden
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Unhappy

Depression kills.

It's just a shame that all this outpouring of love and grief for this man comes *after* his death.

How many lives could have been saved if people who suffered from depression could have known how many people really care for them?

We need better support for these people.

RIP Robin Williams.

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MPs to gaze upon biometric data industry's ID-gobbling tech

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

How dare these companies slurp biometric data?

That's *OUR* job!!

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Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner: Capital is top target for computer thieves, say police

Graham Marsden
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Holmes

Well, yes, because...

... London is full of low-life scum who do nothing, make nothing, produce nothing, but just profit by taking something from one person and sell it on to someone else and congratulate themselves on how clever they are being.

Oh, and as well as the politicians and money men and stock brokers and bankers, there are thieves too.

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China to test recoverable moon orbiter

Graham Marsden
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Coat

A grand day out?

Eh, Grommit, lad...

... someone's copying us!

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China cracks down on instant messengers: Users must hand over REAL NAMES

Graham Marsden
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Big Brother

"only posting authentic information"...

"No country in the world allows dissemination of information of rumors, violence, cheating, sex and terrorism..."

... by anyone else apart from the Government, because that's *their* job!

FTFY

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Twitter can trigger psychosis in users

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

@jake - Re: To say nothing of the addiction factor ...

> She got the classic withdrawal symptoms ... shakes, sweats, angry, name it ...

AKA "Stroppy Teenager Syndrome"...

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OK Google: Gobble chat app Emu. OK Google, now shut down Emu

Graham Marsden
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"We know it's an inconvenience...

"... but we don't give a damn because we want to ensure that you don't have a choice of products, so you can only use ours..."

FTFY.

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UK WhatsApp duo convicted of possessing extreme porn

Graham Marsden
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@Destroy All Monsters - Re: Always look on the bright side of stuff

> Am I bad?

If it's on the same computer/ on the same hard drive/ in My Documents/ in the same folder* as other porn (*delete depending on how paranoid you feel) and the Police reckon they can argue that you have those images "for the purposes of sexual arousal", then, yes.

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Graham Marsden
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@aBloke FromEarth - Re: Possessing an image likely to cause injury

> In fact (and I'd need to have a proper search for this sometime) there was a loose inverse correlation between access to porn and incidences of sexual violence.

Check out the work of Professor Milton Diamond of the University of Hawai'i

> But then again, when did politicians ever use facts to decide laws?

This was the last Labour regime who gave us "Policy Based Evidence Making". Unfortunately we're liable to get the same bunch of moralising clowns back into power after the next election :-(

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Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo

Graham Marsden
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Re: @ Graham Marsden

> Or are you advocating that people who actually fall asleep on the wheel should carry on driving at all cost untill they find a service area (or die trying?).

Now you've gone from a False Dilemma to a Straw Man argument...

No, of course I am not advocating that. I'm advocating *GET OFF THE BLOODY MOTORWAY IF YOU'RE TIRED AND FIND SOMEWHERE SAFE AND LEGAL TO STOP AND NAP!"

Servicer area, next junction whatever, just don't drive tired.

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Graham Marsden
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Re: @ElReg!comments!Pierre - Genuine reason.

I suggest you look up the fallacy of the False Dichotomy.

Sleeping when driving is stupid and illegal.

Sleeping on the hard shoulder is also stupid and illegal.

Sleeping at a service area is sensible and not illegal (even though officious private parking companies may try to fine you for doing it!)

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Graham Marsden
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@ElReg!comments!Pierre - Re: Genuine reason.

If someone is feeling sleepy, they should pull off at the next junction or service area and stop and get some sleep.

Doing it on the Hard Shoulder is not only illegal, but stupid because if another vehicle, let alone an artic happens to drift across...

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Graham Marsden
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Boffin

@Steve the Cynic - Re: I'm not sure

> the right lane (the fast one)

You mean the Overtaking Lane?

Just as motorways have *two* overtaking lanes, the basic rule of the road being "Keep left unless overtaking" which is why idiots shouldn't hog the middle lane when they can move to the left hand lane...

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Who should do security clearance checks? Did you say 'chat-bot'? This military slinger hopes so

Graham Marsden
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Thumb Up

Re: My, hasn't Eliza grown..

Let me tell you about my mother...

... BANG! BANG!

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Climate: 'An excuse for tax hikes', scientists 'don't know what they're talking about'

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

@Cipher - Re: In the 1970s...

> ...boffins were sure that global cooling was signalling a new ice age.

No they weren't.

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Graham Marsden
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Holmes

Scientsts all around the world, responding to a new global survey by Ipsos MORI...

... have generally agreed with the ideas that people don't really know what they're talking about when it comes to the climate...

FTFY

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Are you broke? Good with electronics? Build a better AC/DC box, get back in black with $1m

Graham Marsden
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Coat

I hope we're not...

... on a Highway to Hell...

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Lawyer reviewing terror laws and special powers: Definition of 'terrorism' is too broad

Graham Marsden
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Boffin

@LucreLout - Re: I have argued for many years

> Freedom fighters attack only military targets, terroists attack civilians. It's extremely clear cut.

Wow! I wish I lived in your lovely black and white world where things are so clear cut.

Still, you must be right, after all, no innocent Palestinian civilians have been killed by Israel in the last week or two, have they?

And all those people who lived in Dresden must have been in the German military because it would have been terrorism to firebomb a city full of civilians.

And there's no such thing as Collateral Damage.

And...

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