* Posts by malle-herbert

521 posts • joined 1 Jul 2013

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'Acts of war in a combat zone are not covered by your laptop warranty'

malle-herbert
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Joke

Re: The user was unnamed...

Don't you mean : Mr Tony Stank ?

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IBM invents printer that checks for copyrights

malle-herbert
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"often the technologies described never reach the market in any form."

I sure hope so... DRM on the ink and toner-cartridges is bad enough as it is...

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First ATM malware is back and badder than ever

malle-herbert
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Joke

Meh...

Call me again when they've got Doom running on the damn thing...

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Can ad biz’s LEAN avert ADPOCALYPSE?

malle-herbert
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Joke

Re :

You mean :

"OBEY"

"CONSUME"

"REPRODUCE"

"THIS IS YOUR GOD"

"STAY ASLEEP"

etc...

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Siemens Healthcare struck by rebranding madness

malle-herbert
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Joke

If only...

The marketeers had consulted with some languageneers...

Then the journaleers at El Reg wouldn't be complaining ?

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Food for Deep Thought: 42 is IBM's answer to Life, the Universe and Everything...

malle-herbert
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Joke

Re: Screen grabs

And it isn't even a picture of "deep thought" itself...

I mean, those guys at IBM may be able to talk all four legs off an arcturian megadonkey, but can they convince it to go for a walk afterwards ?

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Why has Microsoft stopped being beastly to Google?

malle-herbert
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Big Brother

The only reason...

Microsoft stopped being mean to google is because they are becoming more and more like them...

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Amazon ports Alexa voice assistant to Raspberry Pi

malle-herbert
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Big Brother

So Amazon wants to turn your Raspberry Pi...

Into a Raspberry SPi...

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R&D white coats at HP Inc will make corporate ID into wearable tech

malle-herbert
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So they want everyone on the planet to wear a badge ?

Does it come in the shape of a yellow star ? Or maybe a pink triangle ?

No thanks...

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Researchers find hole in SIP, Apple’s newest protection feature

malle-herbert
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Joke

Re: why did they have to pick that one?

PIS was allready taken ?

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Is this Romanian man really 'GhostShell'? If so, he risks arrest

malle-herbert
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Trollface

Re: My desk doesn't look like that!

I take it you've never heard of stock photo's ?

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Swedish publishers plan summer ‘Block Party’ to thwart ad blockers

malle-herbert
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"ask for the blocker to be disabled"...

How about never ?

All this will accomplish is a huge drop in traffic to their websites...

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Apple fans take iPhone unlock protest to FBI HQ

malle-herbert
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Big Brother

This isn't just about one iPhone...

This is about ALL iPhones...

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Bill Gates denies iPhone crack demand would set precedent

malle-herbert
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Facepalm

No precedent huh ?

How about the 12 other phones the FBI would like unlocked ?

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NASA stormed by 18,000 wannabe 'nauts

malle-herbert
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Joke

Can't blame them..

Sometimes I just don't want to live on this planet anymore...

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FBI says it helped mess up that iPhone – the one it wants Apple to crack

malle-herbert
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Trollface

Re: Most downvotes...

Naaahhh.... I think that record belongs to Martin milan with his 200+ downvotes...

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Privacy Shield: Data Protection Commissioners break out a six-pack

malle-herbert
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Big Brother

Weasel words...

No matter what kind of agreement between the EU and the US is struck...

Do you REALLY think your private data is ever safe with them ?

Because all they need to do is flash the "national security" card and all your data belongs to them anyways...

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Uber, Taskrabbit, other Silicon Valley darlings urge Europe not to screw their business

malle-herbert
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Re: I have no problem with these companies making money..

Yeah... but were talking about American companies here...

The ones that seem to have a total disrespect for everybody else's laws and regulations...

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Sight for sore eyes: Dropbox lands on Win 10 with iris recognition

malle-herbert
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Mushroom

Indeed... like I'm EVER going to trust Microsoft with my fingerprints or iris-scan...

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AMX backdoors US govt's comms system with Batman-inspired surveillance mode

malle-herbert
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Big Brother

This is just...

Too good to be true...

Finally the US get's a taste of it's own medicine...

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DARPA commits to brain-computer interface development project

malle-herbert
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Joke

"without any pesky middle-men such as limbs"

Ah... so we're all to become like Daleks then...

I think I'll have a 'blast' driving around in 'my little tank'...

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Europe's satellite laser comms system set to shine

malle-herbert
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Re: buy why?

Radiation shielding...

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malle-herbert
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Joke

Re: You forgot-

Yeah... we get it... you're a Doctor Who fan...

Now get off my planet...

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Bigger than Safe Harbor: Microsoft prez vows to take down US gov in data protection lawsuit

malle-herbert
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Facepalm

If Microsoft really cares about people's right NOT to be snooped on...

It should give people the option to turn OFF all this snooping done by their latest OS...

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Probe launched after mischiefmaker invades US spyboss's Verizon broadband account

malle-herbert
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Trollface

How do you like...

Them apples ?

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Intel admits Skylakes can ... ... ... freeze in the middle of work

malle-herbert
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Re : BIOS issue?

It's NOT a BIOS issue... it's a processor's microcode issue...

Your BIOS basically uploads a microcode update to the cpu and by updating

the BIOS you update the version of the microcode it contains...

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Apple buys mood sniffer AI firm Emotient. Stop rolling your eyes at me, user

malle-herbert
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Joke

Just wait...

Until your iPhone gets fecal recognition...

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Periodic table enjoys elemental engorgement

malle-herbert
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Re: If they happen to be Dr Who fans...

Or Gallifreyum...

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malle-herbert
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Joke

Unobtainium...

See title...

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Aroused Lycra-clad cyclist prompts Manchester cop dragnet

malle-herbert
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Paris Hilton

Re : I trust it will be equally illegal for women to have erect nipples?

Or camel toe...

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Electrician cuts wrong wire and downs 25,000 square foot data centre

malle-herbert
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Facepalm

If anything can go wrong...

It will...

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Doctor Who: Oh, look! There's a restaurant at the end of the universe in Hell Bent

malle-herbert
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Trollface

Re : "Teenage Mutant Lesbian Timelords"...

Throw Rose in there too and we've got a deal mister !

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malle-herbert
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Happy

Re : "They never kill the companion"

Yep... poor Adric...

Alltogether... great episode !

Loved the "get off my planet"... twice...

And the high councel gets to leave on the next shuttle...

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Goodbye, Hello Barbie: Wireless toy dogged by POODLE SSL hole

malle-herbert
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Joke

Never knew...

Barbie came with a free poodle...

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Sysadmin's £100,000 revenge after sudden sacking

malle-herbert
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Trollface

Re: James is a dick...

He was fired... he had no obligation to tell them AT ALL...

And since his IT director was being a bag of dicks himself and all...

Yeah, I would have done exactly the same, not my problem...

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'Dear Daddy...' Max Zuckerberg’s Letter back to her Father

malle-herbert
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Re: 'Dear Daddy...'

Once I'm old enough to find out that you've created a FaceBook page in MY name and without MY consent, I will sue the everloving crap out of you !

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Italians to spend €150m ... snooping on PS4 jabber

malle-herbert
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Joke

Re: not clear whether any useful intelligence was ever produced

And "Death to the Infidels" spelled out with flying penisses...

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malle-herbert
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Big Brother

Talk about paranoia...

More (snooping) power Igor !!!

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EU privacy watchdog calls for more ‘processing of personal data’ transparency

malle-herbert
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Facepalm

Obtaining consent...

That's funny because I don't remember giving arseholes like FaceBook the right to track every website I visit, And since I don't have a FaceBook account I won't be able to 'opt-out' of anything...

Same goes for all those people who fell for the Windows 10 trap since there is no way to opt-out of Microsoft spying on you...

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Doctor Who: The Hybrid finally reveals itself in the epic Heaven Sent

malle-herbert
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Happy

Hybrid...

Well... I knew from the 1996 movie with Sylvester McCoy and Paul McGann that The Doctor was half-human / half-timelord because his mother was human so this wasn't exactly unexpected...

I'm really looking forward to next weeks episode !

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Sneaky Microsoft renamed its data slurper before sticking it back in Windows 10

malle-herbert
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Big Brother

This isn't a coincidence...

And as I have said before... Windows 10 isn't free...

You'll pay for it... one way or another...

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Video malvertising campaign lasted 12 hours? Try two months

malle-herbert
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Re: So what the hell do they need code for?

Tracking everything you do, what software you have installed and in general basically anything short of raping you...

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Brit filmmaker plans 10hr+ Paint Drying epic

malle-herbert
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Trollface

Re: true suffering

And just to mess with them... put someone in there saying the word "F*CK" so they'll HAVE to watch the entire movie or else everyone will know that they haven't...

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Car radars gain sharper vision after ITU assigns special spectrum slice

malle-herbert
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Re: 430–770 THz

Don't you mean : 390 - 700 nanometer ?

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No, the EU is not going to make hyperlinks illegal

malle-herbert
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It depends...

If they're going to make automatic content aggregation illegal... fine by me...

BUT if they would make it illegal to MANUALLY collect the data, re-package it and present it as something new then well... bye bye Fark.com...

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GCHQ goes all Cool Dad and tags the streets of Shoreditch with job ads

malle-herbert
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Big Brother

Why not put up a few posters while your at it ?

Like this one...

Or this one...

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FCC won't track Do Not Track

malle-herbert
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FAIL

"rules that apply to voice providers weren't a good fit with Internet providers"

I'm sorry... but isn't 'do not track' almost the same as 'do not call' ?

If my number is added to a 'do not call' register and some marketing a-hole decides to call me anyway how is that different from setting 'do not track' in my browser and being tracked by some ad-slinging f*ckwad company ?

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GCHQ starts hunt for tech-savvy apprentices

malle-herbert
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Joke

Do they have a recruitment poster ?

Poster...

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Cyber cop: Snoopers' Charter tag is offensive. Maybe we need a 'yes to snooping' tickbox?

malle-herbert
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Big Brother

"offensive" and "patronising"...

Exactly the same words I would use for a government bent on spying on everyone and everything...

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'Govt will not pass laws to ban encryption' – Baroness Shields

malle-herbert
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Big Brother

The first duty of any government...

Is to make sure we keep the masses under control !

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