268 posts • joined 24 Jan 2013
Wouldn't it be nice..
..if a worldwide consumer group got hold of the reins for the rest of eternity.
A group that defines standards for all things and in this case operating systems.
An OS would then be expected to meet ALL the standards in every iteration it churns out and thus support the old programs that had also adhered to the standard.
New doc formats, for example, would have a requirement that they are accessible by older programs, its just that the older program would not display the flashing neon banners and such like, that the new format offers.
If installing the latest Windows was just that simple, but it isn't as you now have to factor in a whole gamut of devices and software that has ceased to function.
We only need to look at how the instruction byte Intel had taken ownership of has become perhaps the most inefficient part of x86 architecture. Even when it was obvious this byte was going double they still squandered the remaining resources left in the first byte, so now we have four byte instruction sets that could easily have been implemented in just two.
No more turning over a USB thing, then turning it over again to plug it in: Reversible socket ready for lift off
Gimme, gimme, gimme
"So you want type C functionality on your PC. Hmm. Well here's my pitch"
"I can install a PCI card at a cost of £25.99, with a front panel in a spare 5 and a 1/4 for £15.99, but then you're 450 watt PSU will need tearing out and replacing with at least a 750 watt "Ultra C" compatible. Ooo I'd say £75ish for a middle of the road one. Add to that, my time, VAT and several cups of tea and you're looking at £180 to add the new USB standard to your tired old i5."
"What? You don't want it now. You'll buy a new PC with it already crammed in. Would you mind waiting a few days while I swap my shares in PSU inc for PC inc ?"
Re: BT Retail used to be masters at this
I managed to sort my phone v's broadband contract in a very neat fashion indeed.
When the contract came up for renewal I transferred my phone number to a voip provider and negotiated a broadband only contract.
The phone service is way beyond what my ISP offered with many features, I would normally have had to pay for, supplied as standard.
I use my normal phone and have never had a problem.
£21 ish for broadband £6 ish for phone and the knowledge I can keep my exact same number no matter where in the world I move to, which incidentally means I can call anywhere in the UK from anywhere in the world for free and they similarly can call me as if I was still in Blighty.
Re: A candidate...
...and 500 years later, another race who had never known of mankind's existence, stumbled onto the devastated remains of Earth's once bustling civilisation.
Keen to understand what had once existed there, and even more intrigued as to how this once great people had vanished from the galaxy, they set about excavating through hundreds of feet of cockroach droppings.
Many months of fruitless search ensued until the day they stumbled onto a data centre.
It took their engineers many months more to coax something out of the scant remnants of data, but they finally found their answers to the question that had plagued their minds so long.
The head of the team stood proudly in front of the galactic media screen to announce their findings.
I will loosely translate what he said.
"Dear citizens of the inhabited planets and those in between. After sifting through many mountains of yummy droppings we have discovered what happened to the humans. The conjecture was right, they were indeed invaded by Mars and the chaos that prevailed was sufficient to cause the population to end it all. I shall now read you some of the man from Mar's statements, please ask your children and those of a weak disposition to leave the room....."
err I can't translate the rest as it seems to be gobbledygook.
Re: Job advertisement
Dear Spork / Hen
I am writing in response to your job advert for a chick / vulture, which I saw on The Register.
I have many sober moments, where I can recollect instances of drooling over the latest technology, the photograph's of which I have attached in lieu of a relevant CV:- Me and my CBM Pet: me and my Amiga: me and my Dragon: me and my ZX81, all of which demonstrate I am deeply rooted in the world of frustrating little boxes of joy.
I have never passed myself off as an expert in this particular field, but I understand how plagiarism works in principle and am willing to learn the art.
My current remuneration is linked to my productivity. As I am mostly down the food bank, I'd suggest emailing would be preferable to contact by telephone.
I look forward to you swooping down and grabbing, what I modestly consider, this glorious feast of talent very soon.
P.S. can I book September off as I'm going to a music festival in late August and will still be a little delicate.
p.p.s. I have also attached forty pages of continuous feed printout of a word processing program I written in 6502 machine code.
p.p.p.s I don't think the authorities will allow me to enter America to work at your offices there.
@ big_D. You are of course right, but it's the smaller engines that are still linking which raises the spectre of another way to skin this cat.
Perhaps, and I'm not trying to be contentious here, but perhaps we accept Google is the search God and that all other engines should be subservient to it.
That is, other search providers crawl through Googles lists to display their twist on results and not go it independently. Therefore Google does the de-listing work and this censured list becomes the de-facto face of the internet.
Or am I being totally naive, to trust Google not to take absolute advantage?
Yes, I probably am.
If those linking to the data are to be let off the leash, then it will fall to the data providers to review what they hold?
I can see many data sources considering removing everything that is older than, let's say two years, to ensure compliance, instead of the painstakingly expensive option of case by case.
Ah, now it all becomes clear. Historic data will once again be back in the hands of the privileged few and therefore can be rewritten to suit without any oversight from the billion or so people who at the moment are invested in that data.
1984 by the back door. "We were never at war with Max Mosley. He fought courageously against the Nazis in stockings and leather thigh boots"
I was told texting back STOP to unwanted texts would work, but it certainly wouldn't work if that was a blatant scamming job searching for live mobile numbers.
Why not force the carriers to accept a forwarded text from their customers as an instruction to stop all communication from that number?
So you want to send little Timmy an email...
...well, err, this is what I recommend.
"And how much will that cost deary"
"Well, only £18 per month" uttered while coughing "for the first 6 months then £70"
"Sorry deary, did you say £70"
"Errrr yesss, but you get all the boxing, porn films and cricket you can take"
"I don't want any of that"
"I'm afraid it's part of the package, this isn't Wollworth's pick and mix"
M$ & HP will work things through....
..in the usual manner.
It hasn't happened yet, as the worldwide recession is still a factor, but once things are on the up, M$ will do it's usual job creation rally by releasing an "upgrade" that makes half of your hardware obsolete.
And when I say obsolete, I mean completely useless as the drivers will no longer work.
HP and other players will also do their usual and refuse point blank to write new drivers, while happily pointing you toward their new shiny shiny.
This is how the old school create growth in a stagnant market, by ensuring what you bought five years ago has to be replaced.
Re: anti-smoking laws?
A good example.
Just as well America banned slavery when they did, as the cost to reimburse the industries for lost profits would be prohibitive once this little gem gets imposed.
If companies wish to trade as super humans, with rights and privileges elevated above humanity, then I should think it only fair they suffer punishments for transgression far and above those experienced now.
Maybe, when a man in a white lab coat starts to approach Google et al with a syringe loaded with an overdose of Pentobarbital they might consider a deathbed conversion away from the dark side preferable.
Re: I'm gonna start a new business, anyone care to join?
Err, I have my litigants guide to America and it suggest the term "allegedly" be scattered liberally through any statement I make regarding the performance of a named company. Also by talking in a rounded way they cannot squarely corner me.
As the alleged terms corrupt and incompetent are not allegedly the sole preserve of the companies you mention, the only other identifying features, that of, filling well heads with the left over goo from a nearby motorway construction, is also a practice of a community of travelling salesmen with a sideline in lucky heather.
Might I suggest, in the future, when your contract states you must use a preferred political donor to fill your well head, it would be most advisable to pay them off in stuffed brown envelopes and then get a bunch of gypsies in to do it. It will be months, rather than days before the weeds start poking through and the whole thing starts to crumble away.
I'm gonna start a new business, anyone care to join?
The business is drilling for oil as close to American shores as possible.
Obviously I will use the most incompetent and corrupt local company to dump whatever they tell me is cement sludge on my well head and...well...wait for the disaster.
After the company has been dragged to hell and back through the courts I can then sue the American government for having the audacity to pass a law that makes it illegal to fuck up their coastline, their livelihood and the waterline of million pound yachts.
It's only fair, as most American globals are fucking up society better than a politician on PCP.
Re: Souds good
Now that would improve the morning, as my extra head could wake me up at about ten, in time for morning break and not at nine in time for the departmental meeting.
"Hey Zaphod, did you say anything stupid while I was sleeping through that meeting?"
"NO, of course not, I vehemently agreed with everything the boss said"
"So you did say something stupid"
The expertise shown by several of his staff recently might suggest a merger with the NSA is more appropriate.
As I've explained many times
the dust on my workstation is proof of my explosive activity and not as you assume, total lack of effort and sloth like pace.
The marketing department insists the perfectly working software needs more glam, more pizazz, more flash.
Eventually as a user I am forced into removing their blinged up garbage and have a need to find another provider, one that hasn't been around long enough to have a need for a marketing guru.
Why anyone, other than a teenage chav wannabe would find a need for ninty percent of what Adobe shoehorns into its products is beyond reason.
Oh and while I've got Adobe in my sights, your flash player, with all that extra gooeyness would be much improved if the moronic caption telling me the escape key will cancel full screen mode has a subtext telling me the caption which is currently ruining your viewing pleasure can be stopped forever by typing Yes, yes, I know already, otherwise please wait several lifetimes for the crappy message to go and then restart the video from the beginning.
Re: HMG ????
Me too, but no thank you.
They also offered to upgrade me to 50Mb, but, I smelt a con, which I guess would involve the Super Hub being installed and the price going up beyond inflation AGAIN!!!!!!!
Re: have you tried switching it off and on again ?
"Have you tried sticking it up your arse ?"
"I'm afraid my arse is too full of excuses for the poor service to fit anything not first pulled from my managers arse already"
VM, BT et al
I hope while you are sitting on the sidelines, some of your revenue gets funnelled into the fighting fund for this honourable challenge.
After all, you too will benefit if the whole snooping debacle gets slapped down and you get to remove all the encumbering intrusions that GCHQ forced on you.
Don't forget, technology is shaping up to be an unstoppable force, one which could eventually see all your subscribers signing up with snoop free Brazil ISP over a next gen satellite array.
OK not soon, but the old line to your home is eventually going to get challenged in the market place, so think on.
Great article and supports my opinion that music is becoming more like puréed faeces to better take advantage of the utter disdain we have for fidelity.
Agent Lorrie I see a car parked on double yellows. Can you process?
I am two miles away, can't you do them over yourself
No I'm in Bangkok.
What on earth are you doing monitoring parking while on holiday?
I'm not on holiday I live here.
Well they pay me minimum wage, which allows me to survive admirably in Thailand., so long as I get 5000 parking tickets per week, and assists are just as good.
How does that work?
Well my pet dog has Google glass that streams live CCTV from all the known black spots. When he sees a car he instinctively tries to bite the wheels which activates a bleep on my smart watch and then I contact whoever is closest to the scene to attend and ticket the offending vehicle .
Wow, that's amazing.
Not really, I have to glance at my watch from time to time, which is really tedious.
Re: Anti-Virus is not "dead", profits are flat
You'll be wanting two operating systems then.
One to go online with and one to work offline with.
I do that now.
The online OS is a Linux distro and the offline one is win 7.
and they both get wiped and restored to squeaky clean every now and again with a ghost restore.
Not 100% infallibility, but in this day and age I'd settle for better than a toss of the dice, which seems to be the norm in security.
"Hello, Google? Yes, I'd like some advice, please"
"Sure sir, how can we help?"
"Well, you know how you manage to operate all over the world, and like, not be accountable in any of those jurisdictions"
"Well, I was wondering if you could send some of your guys over to us at the NSA to help us achieve the same status"
"For you sir, anything, we'll have Bob, Charlie and Dave visit you tomorrow, where should they report to?"
"That's OK, Bob knows the way"
Re: The future is APUs
I agree, I built my current desktop around an AMD A10 5800K and while gaming wasn't my first goal, it makes a good fist of it. It runs many modern games at full tilt and maintains my number one criteria for quietness, which not having a discrete, noisy, GPU card certainly helps.
As it is I have one huge chunk of heat sink on the chip with a low noise fan and but for the PSU fan that's it. The exhaust fan is still waiting to be fitted if the temps go up, but that hasn't happened.
I would highly recommend APU chips for any general purpose home build.
Re: A quantum computer running Windows?
Seeing as MS tends to create software that exists in the superposition state of working, but not working properly, I doubt they have the capacity to write the code necessary to lever anything of use from a quantum computer.
Re: I don't get it
If Google declares sod all revenue within the Uk, I guess a 10% penalty isn't much of a threat.
No representation, without taxation.
Re: Logical thought
You don't need teachers to teach kids logic.
Just pit them against a crow in problem solving tasks with treats as rewards.
If they fail to learn from the crow, and win no sweets, I guess logic is beyond them, but there's always the cage of ravenous dogs, where they may prove themselves to be budding politicians.
Re: @'s water music
It isn't the bugs that concern me, but the pathways into these systems that have been created to allow remote access.
Remote access, I hear you say.
Yes, the means, which our over zealous enforcers will undoubtedly demand are present, to, well, better enforce.
The means to upgrade firmware en mass, the means to allow connectivity to the outside world, the means to make the passenger experience, that touch more enjoyable.
All these things add up to a number of attack vectors, that some hackers will be drooling over as we speak.
It isn't right that a world, that has experienced such a huge problem with viruses, rootkits and all should be allowing the same tech companies that left our PC's and phones open to attack, the opportunity to kill motorists in their millions.
Not once have I read about the security of these systems and quite frankly until it becomes the number one issue in every facet of development, I hope they never get off the test track.
While some may point at the success of drones, I would be quick to remind you, malevolent teenage hackers have yet to take one apart, through a fortuitous combination of cost and availability, which the autonomous car in its ubiquitous take up will not enjoy for very long.
Re: Back and forth
As the Earth was considered to only have had the slightest of skins on its surface, a large body passing very close, or even glancing could have brought the Moon into existence without necessarily leaving much of itself behind. Maybe, somewhere out there is a large body, dripping in evidence and looking rather guilty. I must admit Mars looks a bit red in the face.
"Where were you on the night of the attack and can anyone corroborate your story? I'm just going to take a swab for DNA. Please don't leave town Mars, as we may need to ask you some more questions later"
It's the National Storage Association in conjunction with their local partner General Cryptography Hacking and Quantumization, a new start-up from Cheltenham. All respondents will get at minimal cost a brand new state of the art Quantum Switch to better manage the flow of data to and from their systems.
Re: voluntarily ???
Yep, Not ten minutes ago I was knee deep in moneysupermarket's compare electricity providers, which wanted my full address and email before they would show me the results of the comparison.
I'd rather keep whipping the mice on the wheel to go faster than open myself up to a torrent of unwanted mail.
"Hey Steve, Steve. Shouldn't you be at work right now?"
"I can forget I saw you for £20"
"No, hold on, hold on, she's not your wife, insert another £20"
"Hey hold on, I see you earned a princely fortune last year, make that another £100"
"Oh this just gets better, I see from the electoral register you voted for UKIP, insert your entire wallet or I'll put it over the tanoy"
Laughable, but I doubt the fizzy drinks people will consider spending a bottle cap on securing the data, so any hacker could quite easily do the above.
* Note, I do not know Steve and have invented the above scenarios for the purpose of entertaining whilst educating. If his boss is reading this, he was busy at work all day.
Several years ago..
I had a very similar idea to the driver-less car, the driver-less cab, however the overriding factor was that it didn't impede upon any other road users and hence was an answer to congestion.
Well, cab, is my short name for caboose and it runs on a grid network of overhead monorails. The rails follow the current road system and are supported by hybrid lamp posts that also allow the cabs to travel down to street level to embark / disembark.
Most of the cabs would be owned by the operator and available on demand or prebooked. The autonomous system would quickly learn how demand waxes and wanes through the working day and endeavour to have sufficient capacity in the right place at the right time.
Outside the normal rush, spare capacity can be used to transport goods from out of town hubs directly to the shops, taking more traffic off the roads.
I never could see the sense behind the myriad of transport "solutions" that stole ever more of the highway from other users while claiming, without blushing, to be an answer to the congestion.
..using Liquid Steel to fix forever the exhaust manifold on my Morris to the engine block, some twenty plus years ago. Yeah, total bodge, but far easier than drilling the snapped bolt out and it worked a treat, well, outlived the rest of the original steel / iron oxide, it was made from.
I do believe Bolivia is getting its head around the processes necessary to feed the world all the lithium it desires, from the Uyuni salt flats. Which is considered to hold 70% of the worlds confirmed deposits.
It is a slow process though as Bolivia isn't entertaining outside investment, which is understandable when you consider how the country, like many others, had much of its mineral wealth stolen by foreign companies in the past.
Their ultimate goal is to supply the end product, not just the elements to make it and so get a greater return. Without the support of Tesla or the like, the battery technology they eventually fall upon will forever be a decade in the past and likely uncompetitive.
Well, I mentioned Tesla, and they do appear to have a squeaky clean, nice guy image, so if Bolivia is serious about its intentions and Tesla is willing to risk seeing its investment nationalised on a whim....Who knows?
It's all quiet
Makes me consider the possibility that aliens who did blurt out to the galaxy got a bit of a shock visit from those who intend to keep it for themselves.
Just come out and say it.
We want to go analogue!
I wonder how much analogue information could be buffered in a parsec or so of super-conducting cable looping around the site?
Just a thought.
Like a motorway, perhaps?
Apple wants to increase their on ramp to ten lanes and remove the traffic lights and people are arguing that isn't an issue?
Where does the traffic go if not down the very motorway my content is chugging along?
Maybe Apple iSP could be a solution to adding some more lanes to the motorway and off ramps?
I wonder how much a smartphone would cost without the litigation mark-up?
By and by
1.. Buy all your competitors.
2.. Buy all new players
3.. Seek legislation making it illegal to compete with you, (Buy enough politicians)
Re: £550 barebones?
Build yourself a Midi tower PC, for a lot less.
This would give you greater upgrading options and superior cooling that would run quiet if that is your goal.
Then spend the money you save on upsizing your shoebox to a shack, so you might get the extra square foot of space to squander on your new gaming rig.
Re: Nothing to do with the quality of their customer service?
Agree. I would need to die and be reincarnated several times before I forget the appalling dishonesty and downright offensiveness I have been shown by some of Virgin's staff.
However, the same brush of bile covers BT and Sky, who along with Virgin have created a cabal of high priced players, who rely on deceit and doublespeak to entice normally wary citizens into their clutches.
I would dearly like to see the whole telecommunication network nationalised, because it is too important to be left in the hands of companies who time and again have proved themselves to be shameless liars, unrepentant cheats and devious free market subversives.
Alternatively a thin coat of wax and a keen karate student to wax on and wax off, will also defeat evil laser wielding sharks.
Apparently the colossal works churned out by this man, were in fact a collaboration between Stephen Hawking, Stephen Hawkin and Stephen Hawkins, and they'll be telling us it's just a coincidence.
I suspect the teacher had the class sit in alphabetical order and they copied off each other at the exam.
Still using humans?
"The model AI 1000 can outperform humans by any measure and have no morals to cloud their judgement"
"Mmm, you are right, I'll take two for now"
"Wise choice sir, that'll be 20 million bit coins and 5000 a month for the service contract"
"Err, on second thoughts I'll stick with David Cameron and his sidekick for now, they're far cheaper and just as easy to control"
"As you wish Lord Sith, but please take my card, you never know"
Let's not forget
If the Russian company is busy building rocket equipment for the US then their capacity to do it for someone else is severely limited.
It might not be written into the agreement, but I'd bet beer the engineering company has been made fully aware of who is on America's naughty list and how quickly the relationship will turn sour if they so much as nod in the wrong direction.
Re: As a matter of interest ....
But once yo have a mature silicon brain, it can be replicated again and again with very little effort, unlike the hit and miss affair carbon life forms go through.
add to that
The recession, that has stifled demand and limited business investment.
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