* Posts by The Nazz

1023 publicly visible posts • joined 18 Jan 2013

Google ex-employees demand retribution for Thanksgiving massacre

The Nazz

Re: I don't like to judge people based on their appearance...

Jeez, how late were you then? And thankfully, you must be an excellent worker.

We're not trying to be rude here but... there's an ice giant stripping down, emitting gas as it orbits a hot white dwarf

The Nazz

re 897.....

Upvoted simply for your persistence. And actually quite funny this time around.

You can forget about that Black Friday deal: Brit banks crap out just in time for pay day

The Nazz

Yeah

What a highly memorable clip, some woman at Batley (says it all really) four rows back, flailing helplessly towards a cheap (and low priced) Television which she had no hope whatsoever of reaching. But that never deterred her. She was persistent. Comedy gold.

Christmas in tatters for Nottinghamshire tots after mayor tells them Santa's too busy

The Nazz

Problem solved? really?

What about all the mummy-mummy and daddy-daddy offspring? Not to mention the they-they's.

And countless numbers, who for a number of reasons, only have the one parent.

Second time lucky: Sweden drops Julian Assange rape investigation

The Nazz

Re: Assange® Leavin' On A Jet Plane?

More likely he gifted them Stockholm.

Welcome to cultured meat – not pigs reading Proust but a viable alternative to slaughter

The Nazz

All well and good but ...

By the time the first consumer product is available there'll be close on an additional 0.5bn mouths to feed. Not all of whom would eat piggies.

Let's hope it scales super fast.

NASA spanks $34bn on a disposable rocket – likely to top $50bn by 2024 moon landing

The Nazz

Re: A waste of time ? Hardly.

re Pascals cordless drill.

Nah, my grandad had a cordless drill yonks (many years) back. Mind you, he had lopsided sized biceps from having to rotate it very hard, or very fast or sometimes both.

High Court dismisses nameless Google Right To Be Forgotten sueball man... yes, again

The Nazz

and further

Google : "But you don't turn up in Court to see us there."

ABC : "True, but then i don't have to, but you do."

Apple's credit card caper probed over sexism claims – after women screwed over on limits

The Nazz

Re: Rich Bitch

Hmmmm Charge card you say, what could possibly go wrong :

Dick Feller - Credit Card Song 1974

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRhxu-wbCJQ

Bloodhound rocket car target of 550mph put on ice after engine overheat

The Nazz

Seven figures to a Yorkshireman ...

could be as little as £10,198.34.

Though i doubt that would buy much more than a few seconds of Eurofighter jet fuel.

BT launches all-singing converged 5G product for... oof... £58 a month

The Nazz

£58 a month ...

Ain't that bad, the line rental itself and all the "add ons" , which seem to grow in number and cost each billing period, are heading that way before considering the broadband on top.

USAF spaceplane back on Earth after mystery 2-year jaunt in orbit. Jeepers creepers, what has it been doing up here?

The Nazz

Re: What is the sky?

My son came home today from college, distraught.

"What's the matter?" i asked.

"I went to see the Careers Adviser today."

"But that's good" i said. "So why the tears?"

"Well, she said what with my qualifications and expected grades, the sky's the limit. But, but i wanted to be an astronaut."

Remember that competition for non-hoodie hacker pics? Here's their best entries

The Nazz

Re: Idea #42

Instant thought, never a good idea.

How about two C class executives, one male, one female (not politically correct these days?) spunking money all over the place and out through an open window?

On a side note, stock photos, the girl student with the blondish frizzy hair (oft used by the BBC also) just how large is her student loan these days?

Uncle Sam demands summary judgment on Snowden memoir: We're not saying it's true, but no one should read it

The Nazz

Lovely use of English

Gobpiece.

You don't see that written everyday. Love it.

Pack your pyjamas, Zuck: US bill threatens execs with prison for data failures

The Nazz

Re: Ron Wyden gives me cognitive whiplash.

Time for a serious third party? They'd only need the slogan "Build the Gaols".

a) many, many more will be required, if only in the short/medium term.

b) something similar, around 2015/6 worked didn't it?

Junior minister says gov.UK considering facial recognition to verify age of p0rn-watchers

The Nazz
Devil

Easier than that, just mandate that the first visible thumbnail on any porn site is that of the SNP's leader.

God forbid, Nicolas Nicola.

Sorry!!

Tinfoil-hat search engine DuckDuckGo gifts more options, dark theme and other toys for the 0.43%

The Nazz

Ought to be a larger market share

How 'canard is it to use?

See you in Hull: First UK city to be hooked up to full-fibre broadband

The Nazz

Re: Um

Probably ranks quite low for fibre intake also.

£99,999, what's your emergency? Paramedics rush to OAP's aid after shock meter reading

The Nazz

My provider

sent a letter stating that their fitter was going to fit a smart meter on 8th November and asked me to confirm that date or change it. Note no option (offered) to cancel it permanently.

So i called them :

Me : I don't want this meter fitting on the 8th.

They : Ok, would you like to change the date?

Me : Yes please.

They : Oooooh great, (shuufles about in their seat), what date would you like Sir?

Me : 29th February 2057

Bastards hung up didn't they.

The mod firing squad: Stack Exchange embroiled in 'he said, she said, they said' row

The Nazz

Re: Is this just an English thing ?

I notice you make a clear distinction between "a 250lb body builder has a huge beard and wears a tutu" and your wife.

Not always the case, Though as they say, there is someone for everyone.

EU's top court says tracking cookies require actual consent before scarfing down user data

The Nazz

What have the Germans ever done for us?

Plenty. And more of it please.

Careful now, UK court ruling says email signature blocks can sign binding contracts

The Nazz

Re: Law Society Formula B

Always an opportunity for the late great Shel :

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tkAAEXwClio

What's that smell? Perfume merchant senses the scent of a digital burglary

The Nazz

Reminds me of my favourite perfume (huh?).

"Sweat" by Graft.

Fraught 'naut who sought consort's report says: I was up to naught, I will thwart fault tort

The Nazz

Parental rights issue

Fascinating to know how this works out, presumably Worden is the biological mother? Or maybe not.

The Nazz

Divorced here too (surprise, surprise) but the first thing the lawyers said was to make a will.

I said I know the Mrs is evil (and a psycho) but she's not that evil.

Leaked EU doc plots €100bn fund to protect European firms against international tech giants

The Nazz

A radically different approach. With prior art.

What resources does Europe have that the US , China for example can't snatch or buy up?

Millions of underemployed, under utilised people. And billions upon billions of ton(nes) of rock. And significant forests.

What is it desperately short of? Housing.

Put the people to work in the quarrying, masonry , housebuilding and forestry industries. Perfect, equal opportunities for all, localised work and trickle down economy.

What do you mean it'd never work? Have you not seen what the capital cities of Europe, not to mention northern towns such as Bradford and Halifax are mostly built out of?

Bonus(es) : At the end of a working day, most folks would be too knackered to bother with facebook, twitter, snapchat et al. Not to mention a reduction in Obesity.

Nor would you need investment on a scale anywhere near £100bn of printed money.

Don't trust Facebook's Libra cryptocurrency, boffins warn: Zuck & Co know that hash is king

The Nazz

Re: "could lead to biased decision-making"

Off topic, but i can't help but notice that for the last 20 or so articles i have read, Mr Monett is always the first poster. Maybe that's just my bias, just the few articles i do read.

'Hey Google, remind Greg the locks have been changed, and he should find a new place to live. Maybe ask his mistress?'

The Nazz

Re: Dystopia, one improvement at a time

Best hurry up, won't be long before all advertising is banned. : https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-49332640

In one, three people, a whole three people, complained.

And you thought the cops were bad... Civil rights group warns of facial recog 'epidemic' across UK private sites

The Nazz

Re: Covered by GDPR?

Me : Do you have my mug on your database?"

Business : "Dunno, what do you look like, send us a recent picture and we'll see."

Me : "Ok, it's on it's way."

Some time later, "Well, do you have my mug on your database?"

"We do now, and oh, by the way, that'll be £119.25 you owe us."

Me : "Wtf, GDPR requests are free of charge.

Business : "They are, the money is due to the shattered lens of our camera."

Pokémon Red and Blue-era trading cards just made their owner a load of green: Complete set sells at auction for $107k

The Nazz

Re: RE: AC

"You could try selling your used underwear on ebay?"

But is that effective, wouldn't the cost of restoring the wallpaper exceed the revenue?

Green search engine Ecosia thinks Google's Android auction stinks, gives bid a hard pass

The Nazz

Plant a tree night.

Right, i'm gonna plant a tree tonight, 45 searches should be a doddle. In fact make it two trees.

Oh, a friend has just advised that 45 searches within pornhub doesn't count, it has to be different sites. Ok, just the one tree after all.

Lancaster Uni cordons off breached systems a week after thousands of folks' data pinched

The Nazz

LUSERS

Lancaster University Student EnRolment System.

The bit i find hard to believe is that 12,500 applied to go to LU. And pay, extortionately, for the privilege.

Broadcom billionaire Henry Nicholas and pal on drugs rap cough up $1m to avoid the clink

The Nazz

Re: i'd throw him in jail and let joe random go free

Not only is he "knowingly supporting the production, distribution, misery and mayhem that the trade in illegal drugs brings" he is also ....

providing business for lawyers.

Ever notice that if crime was drastically reduced, nay eliminated, there'd be a huge drop in the number of lawyers required and their revenue?

Apple loses FaceTime patent appeal again. And again. And again. And again. And again... yes, it's the fifth time

The Nazz

Re: Surely

Ha ha. Years back i volunteered to help with the PTA on a function. Paired with a teacher who boasted, "we've done well with our offspring, one's a Doctor, one's a Lawyer."

Straight faced, i said "Well, one out of two ain't so bad.". Didn't get sued either.

Seriosuly, whenever anyone has said anything false about me i usually just laugh. More so if i started the rumour in the first place.

Cambridge Analytica didn't perform work for Leave.EU? Uh, not so fast, says whistleblower

The Nazz

So what?

So what effect did it have if any?

All those i know who voted leave, ie those that freely admit it, have waited the best part of 30-40 years to vote out/Leave so this new fangled internettery/faecesfuck ain't gonna have made much difference.

Those same people will also have the same 30-40 years experience of being lied to by pollies of all sides. Baa baa voters.

Watch as 10 cops with guns and military camo storm suspected Capital One hacker's house…

The Nazz

You couldn't ..

Not saying for a split second that El Reg have, but......but you couldn't make this shit up, could you?

Inside Job : Parallels* with the Morrisons saga, be interesting to see how that pans out in the UK.

*minus all the ammo and swat raid.

ps why smash the vehicle windows? no-one in their right mind would try escape in them when surrounded by the quasi-military.

Fantastic Mr Fox? Not when he sh*ts on your lawn, kids' trampoline and your soul

The Nazz

Re: Move House.

Third floor flat/apartment works just as well.

Equifax to world+dog: If we give you this $700m, can you pleeeeease stop suing us about that mega-hack thing?

The Nazz

Re: Settlement is BS

Yes, Wyden is right, there should be personal accountability on such matters.

But isn't Wyden a lawmaker? It falls to him and his colleagues to pass laws that have criminal responsibility, deterrents and punishments.

Oh, and whilst you're at it Sen. Wyden, make sure the law includes the same criminal responsibilities for politicians too.

BT staffers fear new mums could be hit disproportionately by car allowance change

The Nazz

Re: Hold on a second

If, as you allude, they are not and do not travel during the course of their work, and most likely never have nor ever will, wouldn't a simpler way of increasing their salary be to just increase their salary?

And where is there any element of "punishment"? And if so, isn't it self-inflicted punishment?

The Nazz

Size of the problem?

FFS how many company cars are genuinely required at BT? 1 in 5,000 staff?

Estate agent dodges GDPR-sized bullet after exposing 18,610 folks' data for two years

The Nazz

Re: Fine too small

True. Wasn't the maximum permissible fine under the DPA the tidy sum of £500,000.

Come on authorities, gazump the fine upto that limit and then see how those f*ckers like it.

UK.gov drives ever further into Nocluesville, crowdsources how to solve digital identity

The Nazz

13,000 copies of Rollercoaster Tycoon 2?*

I peaked at 5,000 guests in a park. Most likely others have exceed that so 13k subsets should cover the UK population.

Added bonus data : Select a citizen and click.

Oooooh look, this person is carrying a) a knife, b) a stash of spice and c) has recently bought a Lamborghini with his benefit payments.

Seriously, it's either a Government ID scheme to deal with Government business alone or not. Stop all of this "Your data will be shared with a select cohort (ie the betterpayers/lobbyists/bribers) of private companies.

*May need adapting a bit for relevant scenarios.

Incognito mode won't stop smut sites sharing your pervy preferences with Facebook, Google and, er, Oracle

The Nazz

Dear websites, Researchers ....

Asking for a friend, natch, but could you please include "NO TATTOOS" as an option, in fact as a default filter? Thanks.

As you will know i, i mean my friend, is partial to that era where the rather fetching french ladies actually look decent with their clothes on. Within the "Golden Age" of porn, circa 1977-1984 (give or take a bit) my friend reckons you'd be (un)lucky to see more than a handful (ooooh errr missus) of tattoos. Suntans, tan lines galore. FTW.

The Nazz

Or alternatively :

Yeah, man. Lots of goats there. Drool, drool.

The Nazz

No kidding!

'I AM NOT PUTTING UP WITH THIS SH*T' Mike Lynch raged at salesmen

The Nazz

Call that an abusive rant?

By the standards of the 80's and the Board of Directors of a large and substantial Top 300 Company/PLC ( the UK) that effort of Lynch's is exceptionally mild and timid.*

"Call that a rant man. THIS is how you do a proper f*cking rant ..............."

No doubt the likes of Jobs, Ballmer, the Oracle guy (Larry, his name slips my mind for a second) did far worse than this every working day.

*and IMO, and others above, very valid.

Humans may be able to live on Mars within halls of aerogel – a wonder material that can trap heat and block radiation

The Nazz

Re: Why not test it on earth?

Was only listening this very afternoon to Max Boyce including Morgan the Moon, his being welsh and the first person to set foot on the moon. Forget the Americans he says, they were only the first ones to bring them back.

From a different era completely.

Yes, I've been swotting up on court evidence in advance, says Autonomy founder Mike Lynch

The Nazz

Re: Still very thin

Mostly agree with your comment re reciprocal purchases. Not sure though how "within two quarters of each others" fits in with the rules, especially if they fell either side of a "year end."

Only being paid by a customer when they get paid by their own customers is also a standard business risk, many a small business (along a chain) goes under in such circumstances.

The Nazz

Re: The Errant Ways to Go ..... of a Malicious Prosecution

ha ha such clarity, you said it twice.

Bulb smart meters in England wake up from comas miraculously speaking fluent Welsh

The Nazz

Top tip

Never take on a Pole at scrabble in their own language.

I once took a MENSA test, in Polish, and couldn't even achieve the Idiot ranking.

Dovidzenia!