* Posts by gregthecanuck

134 posts • joined 19 Dec 2012

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High rear end winds cause F-35A ground engine fire

gregthecanuck
Flame

Dear F-35 first wave purchasers:-

We at Lockheed Martin would like to extend our thanks to you, our venerable team of beta testers.

That is all.

Flame on!!

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Korean cargo line bailout saves Christmas for tech companies

gregthecanuck
Happy

I wonder if the interest on the loan...

... was at a floating rate.

0
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My God, I've got nothing on! Microsoft's $200m Wunderlist is down

gregthecanuck
FAIL

Looks like Wunderlist's database...

... acquired a case of wanderlust.

2
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Florida Man's prized jeep cremated by exploding Samsung Galaxy Note 7

gregthecanuck
Happy

Re: Unusual dog

That's it. You win the chuckle of the day award. :)

Cheers!

1
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Lose a satellite? Us? China silent on fate of Gaofen civilian/spy sat

gregthecanuck
Trollface

"You're lost another .... "

https://www.getyarn.io/yarn-clip/43a9feda-7898-479c-95c1-7317a4f7b179

1
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Hollywood offers Daniel Craig $150m to (slash wrists) play James Bond

gregthecanuck
Holmes

Who?

Captain Jack Harkness

Daniel Tenant

0
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Watch SpaceX's rocket dramatically detonate, destroying a $200m Facebook satellite

gregthecanuck
Mushroom

RUD

To quote from one of Musk's comments on a previous incident:

RUD = Rapid Unscheduled Disassembly

3
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Astronauts sequence DNA in space for the first time

gregthecanuck
Alien

All I can think of looking at that photo is...

"Someone should paint/stitch/draw alien faces on the brown covers on the spacesuits!"

6
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Amazon now renting cloudy desktops for $0.22 an hour

gregthecanuck

Re: Difficult to see AWS winning on this one

They are working with Citrix right now - did you miss the announcement? Or else I missed your sarcastic tone?

Register article here

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'Flying Bum's' first flight was a gas, gas, gas

gregthecanuck
Happy

Re: Look up there, a Kardashian

Thanks for that. You win the LOL of the day award. :)

2
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Brit network O2 hands out free Windows virus with USB pens

gregthecanuck
Mushroom

Oh dear...

Gives new meaning to "The pen is mightier than the sword" .

19
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Your 'intimate personal massager' – cough – is spying on you

gregthecanuck

Re: Maybe I'm being naive (again!)

Remember that old AT&T advertisement? "Reach out and touch someone"

Seems they knew more than they let on at the time.... ;)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OapWdclVqEY

http://thephonebooth.com/booths/booth-cards/reach-out.html

4
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Windows 10 Anniversary Update is borking boxen everywhere

gregthecanuck
Facepalm

Bork bork bork

A while back Microsoft laid off a large number of experienced testing/QA staff in USA. I believe a lot of that was 'outsourced' to overseas locations (if at all).

This is the obvious result. Save a few pennies, pay out another penny in dividends, but in the long term you fu@!#! the product.

15
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Harrison Ford's leg, in the Star Wars film, with the Millennium Falcon door

gregthecanuck

Harrison Floored

See title.

6
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Nitwit has fit over twit hit: Troll takes timeless termination terribly

gregthecanuck
FAIL

LEFT$("TWITTER USERS IN GENERAL", 1, 4)

2
6

Harvard gives solar batteries performance-enhancing vitamins

gregthecanuck
Trollface

Oh no, not again

OK, I think it's time we came up with a new acronym for all these improved battery technology articles. I propose:

- Yet Another Better Battery Article

- Describes Amazing Breakthroughs Beyond Assumptions

- Droning On and On

Yup, it's YABBA DABBA DOO!

14
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What's big, blue and red all over? IBM. Profit, z Systems down, cloud up

gregthecanuck

Are we getting close to the day when someone says "Remember when IBM made hardware?".

4
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We'll smash probe into comet 300 million miles away for kicks, er, sorry, ... for science

gregthecanuck

You are the sunshine of my life, that's why I'll always be around...

- Wonder

0
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'I urge everyone to fight back' – woman wins $10k from Microsoft over Windows 10 misery

gregthecanuck
Pirate

Re: Let the lawsuits begin

I think my dad got burned by this one. Panicked phone call a few weeks ago because his computer was upgraded - swears he didn't consent.

This upgrade process is overly aggressive. MS should be taken to task for this one so they don't try anything as stupid as this again. Unleash the Kraken!

20
1

Magnetic, heat scanners to catch Tour de France electric motor cheats

gregthecanuck
Angel

Re: I love Bluetooth

Hey Mike - you win the LOL of the day award. ;-)

Have a good one!

3
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Computerised stock management? Nah, let’s use walkie-talkies

gregthecanuck
Linux

Re: Feet like flippers?

Count me as another fan of Clarks extra wide sizes. They "get it" and the shoes are very well made and durable.

Paddle on dear traveller, paddle on.

4
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Jaxa's litany of errors spun Hitomi to pieces

gregthecanuck
Trollface

They should have called the spin-doctors.

4
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US power grid still fragile in the face of EMP threat: GAO

gregthecanuck
Mushroom

THIS is the biggest threat the US should be concerned with. One good solar blast and it's game over.

2
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Microsoft phone support contractors told to hang up after 15 minutes

gregthecanuck

Oh man, what scars do we both bear having recognized the incorrect file name?

18
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Salesforce.com crash caused DATA LOSS

gregthecanuck
Angel

Staffing realignment

A rolling head gathers no moss...

8
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Who you callin' stoopid? No excuses for biz intelligence's poor stats

gregthecanuck

Re: A BI-pusher writes...

I cannot upvote your comment enough times.

2
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Watch: SpaceX finally lands Falcon rocket on robo-barge in one piece

gregthecanuck

Re: BEAM - lack of ports

USB = Universal Space Bus?

2
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SAP insists no license changes after user's multi-core arm twister

gregthecanuck

Re: Single CPU licences

<off-topic rant>

Maybe by 2037 Crystal Reports will support vertical alignment of text fields... mustn't have received enough license fees to cover the incredible expense of that feature...

<as-you-were>

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Oracle confesses to quietly axing its UK software support centre

gregthecanuck

Re: The reason?

Thanks needed that laugh!! :)

2
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Game of Photons: Boffins make ICE with FIRE

gregthecanuck

Nooooo....

This makes me think of Arnold as Mr. Freeze... make it stop!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkTHtWX7CCY

0
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Microsoft Band 2 wrist watchers in pay-first-ship-much-later rage

gregthecanuck

Unbearable

It's obvious - you are hitting the polar bear behind you directly on the head with your vigorous backswing...

1
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Ice volcanoes just part of Plutonic pandemonium

gregthecanuck
Devil

Fact check on aisle 7

Had to look up the term hummocky:

Hummocky (Adj.) "Rocky or bumpy terrain traversed by Hummer or other suitably equipped vehicle".

2
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Ad networks promise to do something about the awful adverts you're all blocking, like, real soon

gregthecanuck

Radical suggestion

I understand that there exist some previously standardized file formats that, after sufficient evaluation, testing and pilot studies may provide a suitable cross-platform industry-standard solution.

These are lean formats that require no plug-ins, Flash, HTML5, JavaScript, JAVA, or any other technologies.

GIF and JPG files you bloody wankers!!

13
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Shoe stores top US credit card EMV-ready leaderboard of fail

gregthecanuck

These guys better pull themselves up by their bootstraps else they get a good tongue-lashing!!

0
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World panics, children cry, workers sigh ... Facebook.com TITSUP

gregthecanuck

"Guru Meditation"

Love it! Still some Amiga fans out there! :-)

2
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NASA announcement of MAJOR MARS DISCOVERY imminent: WHAT can it be?

gregthecanuck

Think about it. What do you use to repair said sunglasses?

7
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gregthecanuck

A sonic screwdriver...

0
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CHEAT! Volkswagen chief 'deeply sorry' over diesel emission test dodge

gregthecanuck

Emissions...

Oh there will definitely be emissions - from VW's head orifice...

2
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Volkswagen used software to CHEAT on AIR POLLUTION tests, alleges US gov

gregthecanuck
Mushroom

Can of worms out of stock in aisle 3

If *I* had a new VW diesel product and this came to light I would be returning the vehicle.

Lord knows what will happen to your mileage once the remediation is complete. I am guessing that in order to meet the emissions standards the MPG will suffer. And also how will the engine hold up running in a higher emissions control mode (likely hotter?) over a long period of time.

Nope, I would wash my hands of the vehicle. False advertising, lemon, whatever.. not my problem.

The lawyers are going to go totally ape on this one. Major class action territory this is... get those popcorn poppers going (after testing their emissions)...

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It's alive! Farmer hides neglected, dust-clogged server between walls

gregthecanuck
Megaphone

On failure...

All in all it was just a brick in the wall....

21
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Long-memoried boffins re-invent 1950s ferroelectric tech

gregthecanuck

Re: IBM 1401 Core Memory Explained

Great article - thanks for the pointer!

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Post-pub nosh neckfiller: Fancy a ham and cheese 'dry tree trunk' sarnie?

gregthecanuck

Om nom-nom-nom

Looks very tasty! Nice pictures as well.

I'm currently on a Korean food kick at the moment. Lots of great recipes out there. My favourite Youtube channel at the moment: Maangchi Korean cooking a go-go

Luckily I have a local H-Mart stocking all sorts of Korean goodness.

Keep that post-pub grub bubbling!!

1
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Hats off to Nintendo’s platform supremo Super Mario Bros at 30

gregthecanuck

Great retrospective article - thanks!

We have a Wii U at home and it gets a lot of use. It is a lot of fun for all ages. The gamepad is pretty cool - wife can play her favourite game (Super Mario 3D World) on the gamepad while others use the TV to watch a particular show.

2
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Soyuz docks with ISS, delivers trio of fresh 'nauts

gregthecanuck

Congratulations to everyone involved on getting up there *safely*. Everything after is gravy.

2
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Amazon to trash Flash, as browsers walk away

gregthecanuck

Re: Missed by that much....

Same for me. Funny. Our brains must want something.... ;-)

1
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iOS storing enterprise credentials in directory anyone can read

gregthecanuck
Facepalm

Cal me a skeptic...

Bets on Apple being "encouraged" or "paid" to create this vulnerability? Something like "do this or your offshore cash stockpile becomes taxable"?

It seems so entirely obvious to be a gigantic security hole? Surely some bright spark would have realized the gaping hole being created?

(Puts down conspiracy hat, walks away...)

0
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Japan's 'White Stork' soars heavenwards to ISS

gregthecanuck

Nice!

Congratulations Japan!

NASA video of full flight up to payload separation here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDQQUnyMtFM

2
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Flying Spaghetti Monster spotted off Angolan coast

gregthecanuck

Wow

Looks like a cross between a jellyfish and a large anemone.

Weird looking for sure, but cool at the same time. Definitely something new!

0
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Beaten blokes HATE the women who frag them in online games

gregthecanuck

How about this combo?

My 13 year old daughter and I play Smash Brothers a fair bit. I'm over 50. We mention that in our handles so other teams online know what they are up against.

It's quite funny to see some of the reactions when other 2-player teams are beaten by a *girl* and her old man... ;-)

(She plays a mean Jigglypuff, I'm a semi-decent Pikachu).

2
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Game of Thrones: Where to now for headless Nintendo?

gregthecanuck

Re: Pretty offensive article.

In our house we have a Wii U and an Xbox 360. The Xbox gathers dust while the Wii U gets used a lot by the wife, the kids and their friends.

I wouldn't say the prices for Wii U games are much lower than PS4/XB1 titles, but there is a lot of content/value for the money.

Great console - the gamepad gets a lot of use - especially in situations where the TV is in use for other purposes.

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