* Posts by Dr_N

315 posts • joined 12 Nov 2012

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Stuff your RFID card, just let me through the damn door!

Dr_N
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Re: ID

"What French ID carte? There is no valid ID cards you can get from France unless you are either French or not from the EU (carte de séjour/de travail)."

A "Titre de Sejour". You can request this even as an EU citizen.

I'm actually just renewing mine after an address change, Including all the digital fingerprint shenanigans for the "biometric chip".

It's not compulsory to have, but useful if you don't want to carry your passport around for ID.

(Which is compulsory at all times and doubly so when trying to get into most customer sites.)

Driving licences are not legal valid ID in France as it is not compulsory to update the address on them. Our UK passports don't have an address, but they are valid ID. Who knows how their warped bureaucratic minds work....?

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Dr_N
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ID

What form of ID did you show the doorman, Mr Dabbs?

The number of times I was almost refused entry to some establishments for not having "Valid ID" and not carrying my passport around: I had to apply for a French ID carte in the end to make onsite visits less annoying.

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DRM is NOT THE LAW, I AM THE LAW, says JUDGE DREDD

Dr_N
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Thumb Up

Excellent news

I'll plan to be spending more of my hard won Galactic Groats with them then.

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Oh Em Pee! Giant Android tinkles on Apple in Google Maps graffiti

Dr_N
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Micturating

Sounds much more classy when said that way.

Well done!

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Alfa Romeo MiTo Quadrifoglio Verde: Less fun than it should be

Dr_N
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US Alfa?

You'll probably be waiting a long time for the apocryphal return of Alfa to the US.

In the mean time you could always snag yourself a Dodge Dart:

Basically an Alfa Giulietta sedan.

.

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Dr_N
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Need New Models

I think it's safe to say Alfa really do desperately need some new models.

This is an 8 year old car which has only had minor design tweaks over it's lifetime.

Let's hope Fiat go for a Maserati style re-launch in a couple of months with the new mid-sized saloon.

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Struggling through the Crystal Maze in our hunt for a spare CAT5

Dr_N
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Trollface

WiFi

Don't most corps get around this by using WiFi these days?

Especially if it's just to support sales/marketing sharing their latest animated PowerPoint presentations....

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Don't be stiffed by spies, stand up to Uncle Sam with your proud d**k pics – says Snowden

Dr_N
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Last Week Tonight on You Tube

For some reason official LWT YouTube clips aren't available in the UK when first posted.

Access is allowed a couple of weeks later. (Why?!)

Works fine in France.

A cracking show and a real scoop for Mr Oliver.

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Toyota Yaris Hybrid: Half-pint composite for the urban jungle

Dr_N
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How much is this congestion charge you speak of?

You could get one of those there MG3s for less than 10 grand.

Would the congestion charge cost 6 grand over 3 years?

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'Oh great Commission, save us from the French' pleads Uber

Dr_N
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Re: Why on earth should it be a technology company?

@Trevor_Potts

You've not been to France, have you?

Taxis in France are a law unto themselves.

They refuse fares, overcharge, don't bother working after 10pm and just hang around airports and train stations all day for the 2 or 3 lucrative runs before heading home.

Also they are massively overpriced and represented by a mafia-like organization that brings cities to a standstill at the slightest whiff of reform or competition.

The worst taxis in the world by a country mile.

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Honda CR-V: SUV-lite that’s also light on the pocket

Dr_N
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Re: Not SUV-ie enough

"Err... Your could have said it shorter. In two words: "Ballroom 4x4." "

But then no-one would have understood that phrase at all.

(Already my original post is probably at the limits of understandability.)

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Dr_N
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Not SUV-ie enough

All the latest crop of supposed SUVs just don't look 4x4ish enough for me.

Even in the US you ask for a big SUV rental and end up with some 2WD rounded bodywork Europeanized blob. Pointless things.

Eco-Assist sound like the "Econoscope" (?) you used to get in non-turbo diesel Peugeots from 30 years ago. Jesus.

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Forum chat is like Clarkson punching you repeatedly in the face

Dr_N
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"Looks Irish"

It's funny how you can go through life not noticing a trait, but once it's pointed out you can't help but look for it.

Take the French city of Grenoble:

Since someone pointed out a few years ago that the locals had square faces it's all I notice about the denizens of that city now.

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HTC One M9 Android smartphone: Like a M8 with a squinty eye

Dr_N
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"HTC has designed phones that are pretty distinctive "

How can a slab with a screen and camera on the back be more distinctive than any other slab with screen and a camera on the back?

Distinctive phones are dead. Long live conformity.

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Ford: Our latest car gizmo will CHOKE OFF your FUEL if you're speeding

Dr_N
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Re: France Rain Speed Limit

@Elmer Phud "Doesn't seem to work at all"

Oh I don't know a few months of ads featuring a tagline along the lines of:

"Think once. Think twice. Think C**T!"

would have people adhering to more responsible behaviour.

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Dr_N
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France Rain Speed Limit

Will it be hooked into the wipers so that it deducts 20kph from the posted limit when raining?

Also will it recognize the town name signs (and the crossed out name one when leaving a town/village) which infer a 50kph limit and return to national speed limit too?

Wouldn't it just be cheaper to teach people to drive by running old public service style ad campaigns to make certain types of driving habits/behaviour anti-social?

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Audi TT: It's NOT a hairdresser-mobile, the dash is too flash

Dr_N
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Re: LCD everywhere

@Gordon 10

You have a problem with people who wear glasses or are you just an Audi-o-phile apologist?

@joed

The stereotypical 6" gap that Audi drivers begrudgingly leave between their car and the car in front.

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Dr_N
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LCD everywhere

So I can't drive this car in sunlight as my polarizing sunglasses will mean I can't see any of the displays?

No loss really: I don't feel the need to sit 6" off the bumper of the car in front so will probably not be getting an Audi.

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Dear departed Internet Explorer, how I will miss you ... NOT

Dr_N
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French O-Level

Kudos on the French O-Level, Mr Dabbs

It's the only exam I failed. Spectacularly. With a "U". (Didn't stop me emigrating to France though.)

Corporate project names are not chosen to reflect the function of the project.

They are chosen at the whim of the project lead nerds to obfuscate said function.

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We're not sure what it is, but we like it: Lexus NX300h hybrid SUV

Dr_N
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Re: Butt ugly from all sides!

"And your point is? Because some of us wouldn't be seen dead in one. "

You think driving a Lexus over a Land Rover will make people like you on the roads?

[snigger]

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Yay! Wearables! It's the future! Uh-oh! I'm going to be sick

Dr_N
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Vinegar and Cat’s Piss

Reason enough to avoid the gym.

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For pity's sake, you FOOL! DON'T UPGRADE it will make it WORSE

Dr_N
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Re: This story just goes to prove...

Bit of a harsh statement about Mrs. Dabbs' revenue stream....

But granted, 1500 bucks for a keyboard is a bit OTT.

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Dr_N
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This story just goes to prove...

...we need a keyboard with LCD/eInk keytops that can be configured by the OS to the language/character-set you select, instead of configuring the O/S to accept different keyboards.

It is a royal pain in the 'arris working at tech companies that insist on having AZERTY keyboards for no other apparent reason than the secretaries are somehow involved in the keyboard purchasing decision.

AZERTY+UNIX is not a logical choice as you have to do finger gymnastics to get access to common special characters.

Solaris/CDE and it's "COMPOSE" key was way more practical. Someone actually took the trouble of making up keystrokes that resembled the character you want.

e.g. e + ' = é or e + ^ = ê

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French minister: Hit Netflix, Google, Apple et al with bandwidth tax

Dr_N
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"They much prefer a Hollywood blockbuster dubbed into French."

I think you pulled that "fact" out of your cul:

http://www.allocine.fr/boxoffice/france/

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BBC: SOD the scientific consensus! Look OUT! MEGA TSUNAMI is coming

Dr_N
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Re: So a meteor didn't wipe out the dinosaurs

A meteor doesn't strike the Earth, so no.

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Dr_N
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Is BBC Radio more rigourous ?

Perhaps because they don't have to chase the ratings?

e.g. Most of Radio4's output, including The Infinite Monkey Cage.

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PENGUINS are just TASTELESS, say boffins

Dr_N
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Linux

Not only are they tasteless...

...but also smaller than they were 30 years ago.

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Jaguar F-Type: A beautiful British thoroughbred

Dr_N
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@El_Fev

Re: "Is anyone here, interested in Indian cars made for Arabs and Chinese?"

"GTFO im voting UKIP, and could not give a fuck."

Obviously.

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Dr_N
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"Is anyone here, interested in Indian cars made for Arabs and Chinese?"

Is anyone here interested in your ranty UKIPer comments?

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Smartphones don’t dumb you down, they DUMB you UP

Dr_N
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Finbarr Saunder

Morning Mr Dabbs!

I sometimes get the impression on reading your column that, although you're a bit of a dab hand[sic] with the innuendo, when it comes to real smut 'n' durt you'd end up like a startled deer caught in the headlights. Or it just goes over your head.

Keep up the good work!

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BT coughs £12.5 billion for EE as fourplay frolics pay off

Dr_N
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It'll be up for sale in another 10 years

This is BT after all.

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Living with a Renault Twizy: Pah! Bring out the HOVERCRAFT

Dr_N
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Context is everything

Works well on the Cote D'Azur. Being charged by the goodness of nuclear and hydroelectric.

Less so anywhere in the north.

Also France has culture of "vehicles" that you can drive on the road without a licence from the age of 12 1/2. [sic] Unlike the UK.

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BYOD is NOT the Next Biggest Thing™: Bring me Ye Olde Lappetoppe

Dr_N
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BYOD

Massive fail in France as no one ever puts their hand in their pocket for laptop or mobile purchases.

It is a considered a human right that your employer will stump for a mobile and laptop.

And woe betide the manager who doesn't spec the latest and greatest shiny-shiny and has to deal with the day-in-day-out moaning about how unfair it is people are expected to call their wife/kids/homoeopathist (well they don't use them for work that's for sure) using a three year old Blackberry....

Nothing beats a sense of entitlement.

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Supersonic Bloodhound car techies in screaming 650mph comms test

Dr_N
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Re: Oh FFS

"Im all for technoporn but really? Are they building a fast car or some sort of mini-tech empire?"

Killjoy.

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HMRC fails to plan for £10.4bn contract exit... because it's 'too risky'

Dr_N
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Yet another uk.gov IT overspend and potential cock-up

Why is this newsworthy?

Now if they ever have a project that's delivered almost on schedule and near budget:

That would be newsworthy!

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Chunky Swedish ice maiden: Volvo XC60 D4 Manual EE Lux Nav

Dr_N
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Re: Equipment as standard/Options disabled

"How many of the items you are charged for are only options that have previously been disabled, such as all the heating elements and wiring installed in the seats but the software switch to turn it on is not available."

Cost-conscious car markers are unlikely to pay for heated seats in a car that won't use them.

Although the idea they could then charge 2nd or 3rd hand owners to activate such items has been mooted.

So as yet there aren't many manufacturers who load the cars and just disable the option in software.

(Apart from simple features like auto-folding wing mirrors. Where the difference between manual folding and auto folding doesn't entail additional hardware.)

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YOU. Your women are mine. Give them to me. I want to sell them

Dr_N
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Super Creepy?

Bit harsh.

Although I do have a question:

Is that "Heidi's" real speaking voice or is she doing some kind of baby-talk accent?

Also, the mention of "facial" is always good for a giggle.

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SFO: 'Insufficient evidence' for conviction over HP-Autonomy deal

Dr_N
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SFO

I thought everyone knew it meant Serious Farce Office?

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Citrix goes into the mouse business

Dr_N
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Asus Transformer

Touch Screen, Mouse, Mousepad or Stylus.

You choose what HID you want to use.

Sorted.

Was running a CDE session over Citrix on the Android phone the other day. Very useful.

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Renault Captur: Nobody who knows about cars will buy this

Dr_N
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Re: Looks Good For Dogs

If you are looking for a hound carrier check out Fiat's 500L

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Fill 'er up: 'Leccy car firm Tesla brings back PUMP SERVICE

Dr_N
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No change for Oregon or New Jersey then?

I didn't think people were trusted to "Fill 'er up!" on their own in those states anyway.

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You have a 'SIMPLE QUESTION'? Well, the answer is NO

Dr_N
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I blame the T-Shirt

In the good old days people who worked in shops wore shirts. Maybe even ties.

Now they dress like everyone else. And woe betide you if you walk into any outlet wearing the same coloured tee-shirt as the staff. You will be swamped.

And the people are bloody rude if you nicely explain you don't work there.

So it's better to tell them to, "**** off" to pre-empt their rudeness.

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Alfa Romeo Giulietta Quadrifoglio Verde: Fun, but not for all

Dr_N
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Driven Alfas for years

I've had 3 Alfas since 2001 and apart from the odd battery failure or problem with a German made piece of electronics or sensor have never had a major engine or mechanical issue with any of them.

With only the Giulietta or MiTo in the range to choose from (4C is a long wait and not an everyday car for work) 2014 has been the first year in 13 that I was Alfa-less.

And boy I miss it. This review gets close to capturing the Alfa "thing".

Alfisti have already waited too long:

Roll-on the new models and new (petrol) engines.

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Soon EVERYONE will be doing it with a strap-on: The Reg's 20 festive wearables

Dr_N
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It's the next thing since 3D TV

Big Hype.

Convinced the public want it.

Big investment.

Whoops.

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The STEALTH Plug-in Hybrid: Audi A3 e-tron Sportback

Dr_N
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I'll wait for the Skoda or SEAT versions...

Cheaper, and I won't feel the need to sit it 6 inches off the bumper of the car in front.

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Real Ale TWATS: In SPAAAACE, no one can churn your cream

Dr_N
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How was the Wombat Foetus ...

... "a bit nutty" ?

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Ford dumps Windows for QNX in new in-car entertainment unit

Dr_N
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"I, like anyone who hasn't just passed their test and is an average driver, can readily glance at a control and press it even if it is on a touchscreen"

Wrong.

You can feel for switches & button without taking your eyes off the road.

And there's feedback.

You have to look at a touch screen to use the controls on it.

Touchscreens don't belong in a cars.

HUDs, classic switchgear and maybe voice control are the only acceptable safe methods of fiddling with gadgets in a car.

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UK.gov STILL won't pop a cap on stolen mobile bills

Dr_N
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Re: SIM code lock

"If you have an annoying 'friend' who decides it would be fun to mis-enter your PIN three times then you cannot use your phone again without your network giving you a PUK code or posting you a new SIM. "

Hopefully your "friend" doesn't further enter the PUK incorrectly 10 times as that'll fry your SIM...

I'm amazed there still seems to be people who don't SIM lock.

Mine's been active since 1996. And it uses 6 digits , not 4.

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Égalité, Fraternité - Oui, peut-etre. Liberté? NON, French speedcam Facebookers told

Dr_N
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Only if they are " too accurate".

So long as they conform to NF Logiciel n° 203 and alert to a zone of a few kilometres rather than pin-pointing the exact location of the radar to within a couple of hundred meters they are legal in France.

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VW's Scirocco diesel: A sheep in Wolfsburg’s clothing

Dr_N
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Re: Diesel

"It's got the most energy of all fuels. Hence its efficiency and lower CO2 output."

You've missed the point, AC#1.

DERV use may result in lower CO2 emissions, but all the other nasty pollutants have increased as a result and people are now realising that choking themselves may not be the best course of action.

----

"In France Diesel is a lot cheaper than petrol. So can you really see the French government lowering the cost of petrol?"

Why would you think they'd reduce tax on petrol use, AC#2 ?!

DERV prices have been rising steadily over the last 5 years in France as gouv.fr has been been putting more on gazole, not decreasing tax on essence.

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