* Posts by Dr_N

331 posts • joined 12 Nov 2012

Page:

Land Rover's return: Last orders and leather seats for Defender nerds

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Santana died a death years ago.

0
0

Maserati Ghibli S: Who cares what Joe Walsh thinks?

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: The Anti-Maserati

"Hmm. The girl in the film 'Hanna' (can't remember her name)"

Was it Hanna ?

2
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: diesel

"but a diesel engine of sufficient power has so much torque that it's hard to dismiss it"

The writing is on the wall for private DERVs. Even France, who fell for its faux eco credentials hook, line and sinker are starting to introduce bans in cities.

No amount of pollution control strap-ons will solve the issues with it.

People can now stop fooling themselves with the torque/mpg/eco BS they come out with to try and justify their choice of engine that was based purely on cost. Not power. Not performance, not "torques".

4
2
Dr_N
Bronze badge

Good Relaunch by FCA

The Ghibli relaunch of Maserati is a shrewd move by FCA.

So far it seems to be selling well.

Who wouldn't want to try something a bit less Teutonic given the choice?

5
0

Carry On Computing: Ten stylish laptop bags for him

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Victorinox

No Victorinox? I bought one in the US over 10 years ago.

The expansion zip gave out last year: I set it for repair, but they called me up to say it was not repairable. So they sent me a brand new one gratis. That should last another 10 years.

2
0

Putting your schlong into the reel-to-reel tape machine is a bad idea

Dr_N
Bronze badge

I left for France in '96 ...

...so totally missed this opus.

Ah well, You win some, you win some.

2
0

Manchester car park lock hack leads to horn-blare hoo-ha

Dr_N
Bronze badge

No.

The ignition system, is on a separate RFID type system.

0
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

Yet Another Scary Car Locking Story

Where's the subscription based "Tracker" security pitch that normally goes with these articles?

2
0

Right Dabbsy my old son, you can cram this job right up your BLEEEARRGH

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Names: Google Glass

Is this not the killer App for a Google Glass style gadget?

Also:

Are you still not using joke names at Starbucks, Mr Dabbs....? Ivor Biggun ? Mike Hunt ? How can you resist!?

5
0

SOD TABLETS, if you want to get anything done travelling get a ... yes, a LAPTOP

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: The art of travel....

">> Microsoft Surface might just be your friend

Tempted, tempted. Short of money, though."

One of the Asus Transformer equivalents then?

2
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

Laptop

What you need, Mr Dabbs, is some kind of convertible tablet/laptop combo with a dockable keyboard, full range of ports, able to run a full range of full-fat software and with plenty of battery life.

I wonder where I've seen something like that.......

0
2

Going up hills past blokes with coke-bottle legs: The Smart E-bike

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: Pointless limitations

"So why not wave two fingers at the eurocrats and import the yank version?"

I think you'll find all the restrictions on motorised transport, quadricycles etc are pure 100% British made rules.

Other countries in Europe are much more liberal regarding regulation of such contraptions.

In France they let school kids and convicted drunks drive on the road in 50BHP 4 wheeled mini cars which do not require a driving licence. For example.

7
0

London Coffee Festival: Caffeine, tech and martinis on show in Shoreditch

Dr_N
Bronze badge
Trollface

Coffee aficionados ...

Worse than audiophiles?

3
0

E-voting and the UK election: Pick a lizard, any lizard

Dr_N
Bronze badge

eVoting

Yet another example of trying to ape the USA for no good reason.

Applying a technology/approach for non-existent problems that will translate badly once shipped over the Atlantic.

5
0

Range Rover Sport: Like a cathedral on wheels, only with comfier pews

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Access to a loaner test drive Range Rover...

...and no off-roading?

What a waste of a chance at some fun.

3
0

Stuff your RFID card, just let me through the damn door!

Dr_N
Bronze badge
Thumb Up

Re: Doing a Clarkson

Wow, did you sign-up specially to post all that. Sotorro ?

2
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: ID

"What French ID carte? There is no valid ID cards you can get from France unless you are either French or not from the EU (carte de séjour/de travail)."

A "Titre de Sejour". You can request this even as an EU citizen.

I'm actually just renewing mine after an address change, Including all the digital fingerprint shenanigans for the "biometric chip".

It's not compulsory to have, but useful if you don't want to carry your passport around for ID.

(Which is compulsory at all times and doubly so when trying to get into most customer sites.)

Driving licences are not legal valid ID in France as it is not compulsory to update the address on them. Our UK passports don't have an address, but they are valid ID. Who knows how their warped bureaucratic minds work....?

3
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

ID

What form of ID did you show the doorman, Mr Dabbs?

The number of times I was almost refused entry to some establishments for not having "Valid ID" and not carrying my passport around: I had to apply for a French ID carte in the end to make onsite visits less annoying.

0
0

DRM is NOT THE LAW, I AM THE LAW, says JUDGE DREDD

Dr_N
Bronze badge
Thumb Up

Excellent news

I'll plan to be spending more of my hard won Galactic Groats with them then.

0
0

Oh Em Pee! Giant Android tinkles on Apple in Google Maps graffiti

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Micturating

Sounds much more classy when said that way.

Well done!

4
0

Alfa Romeo MiTo Quadrifoglio Verde: Less fun than it should be

Dr_N
Bronze badge

US Alfa?

You'll probably be waiting a long time for the apocryphal return of Alfa to the US.

In the mean time you could always snag yourself a Dodge Dart:

Basically an Alfa Giulietta sedan.

.

0
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

Need New Models

I think it's safe to say Alfa really do desperately need some new models.

This is an 8 year old car which has only had minor design tweaks over it's lifetime.

Let's hope Fiat go for a Maserati style re-launch in a couple of months with the new mid-sized saloon.

0
0

Struggling through the Crystal Maze in our hunt for a spare CAT5

Dr_N
Bronze badge
Trollface

WiFi

Don't most corps get around this by using WiFi these days?

Especially if it's just to support sales/marketing sharing their latest animated PowerPoint presentations....

1
1

Don't be stiffed by spies, stand up to Uncle Sam with your proud d**k pics – says Snowden

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Last Week Tonight on You Tube

For some reason official LWT YouTube clips aren't available in the UK when first posted.

Access is allowed a couple of weeks later. (Why?!)

Works fine in France.

A cracking show and a real scoop for Mr Oliver.

0
0

Toyota Yaris Hybrid: Half-pint composite for the urban jungle

Dr_N
Bronze badge

How much is this congestion charge you speak of?

You could get one of those there MG3s for less than 10 grand.

Would the congestion charge cost 6 grand over 3 years?

2
0

'Oh great Commission, save us from the French' pleads Uber

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: Why on earth should it be a technology company?

@Trevor_Potts

You've not been to France, have you?

Taxis in France are a law unto themselves.

They refuse fares, overcharge, don't bother working after 10pm and just hang around airports and train stations all day for the 2 or 3 lucrative runs before heading home.

Also they are massively overpriced and represented by a mafia-like organization that brings cities to a standstill at the slightest whiff of reform or competition.

The worst taxis in the world by a country mile.

0
1

Honda CR-V: SUV-lite that’s also light on the pocket

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: Not SUV-ie enough

"Err... Your could have said it shorter. In two words: "Ballroom 4x4." "

But then no-one would have understood that phrase at all.

(Already my original post is probably at the limits of understandability.)

0
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

Not SUV-ie enough

All the latest crop of supposed SUVs just don't look 4x4ish enough for me.

Even in the US you ask for a big SUV rental and end up with some 2WD rounded bodywork Europeanized blob. Pointless things.

Eco-Assist sound like the "Econoscope" (?) you used to get in non-turbo diesel Peugeots from 30 years ago. Jesus.

0
0

Forum chat is like Clarkson punching you repeatedly in the face

Dr_N
Bronze badge

"Looks Irish"

It's funny how you can go through life not noticing a trait, but once it's pointed out you can't help but look for it.

Take the French city of Grenoble:

Since someone pointed out a few years ago that the locals had square faces it's all I notice about the denizens of that city now.

0
0

HTC One M9 Android smartphone: Like a M8 with a squinty eye

Dr_N
Bronze badge

"HTC has designed phones that are pretty distinctive "

How can a slab with a screen and camera on the back be more distinctive than any other slab with screen and a camera on the back?

Distinctive phones are dead. Long live conformity.

3
2

Ford: Our latest car gizmo will CHOKE OFF your FUEL if you're speeding

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: France Rain Speed Limit

@Elmer Phud "Doesn't seem to work at all"

Oh I don't know a few months of ads featuring a tagline along the lines of:

"Think once. Think twice. Think C**T!"

would have people adhering to more responsible behaviour.

0
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

France Rain Speed Limit

Will it be hooked into the wipers so that it deducts 20kph from the posted limit when raining?

Also will it recognize the town name signs (and the crossed out name one when leaving a town/village) which infer a 50kph limit and return to national speed limit too?

Wouldn't it just be cheaper to teach people to drive by running old public service style ad campaigns to make certain types of driving habits/behaviour anti-social?

5
0

Audi TT: It's NOT a hairdresser-mobile, the dash is too flash

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: LCD everywhere

@Gordon 10

You have a problem with people who wear glasses or are you just an Audi-o-phile apologist?

@joed

The stereotypical 6" gap that Audi drivers begrudgingly leave between their car and the car in front.

7
4
Dr_N
Bronze badge

LCD everywhere

So I can't drive this car in sunlight as my polarizing sunglasses will mean I can't see any of the displays?

No loss really: I don't feel the need to sit 6" off the bumper of the car in front so will probably not be getting an Audi.

14
6

Dear departed Internet Explorer, how I will miss you ... NOT

Dr_N
Bronze badge

French O-Level

Kudos on the French O-Level, Mr Dabbs

It's the only exam I failed. Spectacularly. With a "U". (Didn't stop me emigrating to France though.)

Corporate project names are not chosen to reflect the function of the project.

They are chosen at the whim of the project lead nerds to obfuscate said function.

0
0

We're not sure what it is, but we like it: Lexus NX300h hybrid SUV

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: Butt ugly from all sides!

"And your point is? Because some of us wouldn't be seen dead in one. "

You think driving a Lexus over a Land Rover will make people like you on the roads?

[snigger]

6
1

Yay! Wearables! It's the future! Uh-oh! I'm going to be sick

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Vinegar and Cat’s Piss

Reason enough to avoid the gym.

0
0

For pity's sake, you FOOL! DON'T UPGRADE it will make it WORSE

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: This story just goes to prove...

Bit of a harsh statement about Mrs. Dabbs' revenue stream....

But granted, 1500 bucks for a keyboard is a bit OTT.

4
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

This story just goes to prove...

...we need a keyboard with LCD/eInk keytops that can be configured by the OS to the language/character-set you select, instead of configuring the O/S to accept different keyboards.

It is a royal pain in the 'arris working at tech companies that insist on having AZERTY keyboards for no other apparent reason than the secretaries are somehow involved in the keyboard purchasing decision.

AZERTY+UNIX is not a logical choice as you have to do finger gymnastics to get access to common special characters.

Solaris/CDE and it's "COMPOSE" key was way more practical. Someone actually took the trouble of making up keystrokes that resembled the character you want.

e.g. e + ' = é or e + ^ = ê

4
0

French minister: Hit Netflix, Google, Apple et al with bandwidth tax

Dr_N
Bronze badge

"They much prefer a Hollywood blockbuster dubbed into French."

I think you pulled that "fact" out of your cul:

http://www.allocine.fr/boxoffice/france/

0
0

BBC: SOD the scientific consensus! Look OUT! MEGA TSUNAMI is coming

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: So a meteor didn't wipe out the dinosaurs

A meteor doesn't strike the Earth, so no.

1
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

Is BBC Radio more rigourous ?

Perhaps because they don't have to chase the ratings?

e.g. Most of Radio4's output, including The Infinite Monkey Cage.

2
0

PENGUINS are just TASTELESS, say boffins

Dr_N
Bronze badge
Linux

Not only are they tasteless...

...but also smaller than they were 30 years ago.

7
0

Jaguar F-Type: A beautiful British thoroughbred

Dr_N
Bronze badge

@El_Fev

Re: "Is anyone here, interested in Indian cars made for Arabs and Chinese?"

"GTFO im voting UKIP, and could not give a fuck."

Obviously.

0
0
Dr_N
Bronze badge

"Is anyone here, interested in Indian cars made for Arabs and Chinese?"

Is anyone here interested in your ranty UKIPer comments?

31
4

Smartphones don’t dumb you down, they DUMB you UP

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Finbarr Saunder

Morning Mr Dabbs!

I sometimes get the impression on reading your column that, although you're a bit of a dab hand[sic] with the innuendo, when it comes to real smut 'n' durt you'd end up like a startled deer caught in the headlights. Or it just goes over your head.

Keep up the good work!

3
0

BT coughs £12.5 billion for EE as fourplay frolics pay off

Dr_N
Bronze badge

It'll be up for sale in another 10 years

This is BT after all.

3
0

Living with a Renault Twizy: Pah! Bring out the HOVERCRAFT

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Context is everything

Works well on the Cote D'Azur. Being charged by the goodness of nuclear and hydroelectric.

Less so anywhere in the north.

Also France has culture of "vehicles" that you can drive on the road without a licence from the age of 12 1/2. [sic] Unlike the UK.

3
0

BYOD is NOT the Next Biggest Thing™: Bring me Ye Olde Lappetoppe

Dr_N
Bronze badge

BYOD

Massive fail in France as no one ever puts their hand in their pocket for laptop or mobile purchases.

It is a considered a human right that your employer will stump for a mobile and laptop.

And woe betide the manager who doesn't spec the latest and greatest shiny-shiny and has to deal with the day-in-day-out moaning about how unfair it is people are expected to call their wife/kids/homoeopathist (well they don't use them for work that's for sure) using a three year old Blackberry....

Nothing beats a sense of entitlement.

0
0

Supersonic Bloodhound car techies in screaming 650mph comms test

Dr_N
Bronze badge

Re: Oh FFS

"Im all for technoporn but really? Are they building a fast car or some sort of mini-tech empire?"

Killjoy.

4
1

Page:

Forums