* Posts by king of foo

448 posts • joined 2 Oct 2012

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Murderous necrophiliac kangaroo briefly wins nation's heart

king of foo
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Tie me kangaroo down?

No need mate, just kill her. Much easier.

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Microsoft whips out PowerApps – now your Pointy Haired Boss can write software, too!

king of foo
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Re: What is or who is PHB?

Pointy Haired Boss

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Google engineer names and shames dodgy USB Type-C cable makers

king of foo
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KZZZERK!

Why PFY, with this new android based cattle prod you are really spoiling us....

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Ransomware victims: Just pay up, grin, and bear it – says the FBI

king of foo
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Trusting a US government agency on data/security matters post Snowden????

Can't No Such Agency provide a recent backup of the data..

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Samsung told to build bots who work for less than Foxconn staffers

king of foo
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"I'm looking for Cong-Nuo, Shuang-Ru Cong-Nuo"

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king of foo
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What's wrong with good old fashioned

CHILD LABOUR, eh Samsung?

“Samsung should know that many investors are quietly watching how they deal with the child labour issue"

So... this! Looks like terminators come with less bad press.

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EA Games rubbishes Pastebin breach claim

king of foo
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I did not...

....have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky. I never told anybody to lie, not a single time; never. These allegations are false. And I need to go back to work for the American people. Thank you.

Pinocchio's NOSE grew when he lied.

Anyway, I thought EA's DRM rootkits were supposed to prevent the copying of data???

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'Traditional' forms of thuggery decline in UK, cybercrime on the rise

king of foo
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Re: 404 were reports of unauthorised access

It started out that way, but 3 people followed the instructions...

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Who gets Teslas made and throws Apple shade? It's… MUSK!

king of foo
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Re: My compliments to the Title Writer

Impatient youngsters can skip to the 3 min mark:

One of the most sampled theme tunes ever

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To save mobile web, we must destroy JavaScript, HTML and CSS

king of foo
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Re: This AMP-HTML...

I sincerely hope so...

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Microsoft's big Tuesday reveal: New mobiles and slabs? Win 10 shock?

king of foo
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Retail

Xbox OS is dreadful imho; anything they can do to improve it is welcome.

People don't buy iPads because of ios. Most apple users don't know what an ios is. This is what MS don't seem to understand.

Many people who actually pay for windows (not bundled with hardware) are actually closet *nuxers, especially after vista and w8.

I agree that MS needs to do "something", but I'm not sure its smartphones or Xbox.

I'd like to see a focus on speed and security, not this obsession with SQUARES.

I work in an office with glass everywhere. It's square. I come home and my windows are square. I walk past a church and think "f****g pedos", then "oooh, pwetty windows". I'm not saying MS should start buggering altar boys, but they might learn a little from this.

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Hands on with Google's Nexus 5X, 6P Android Marshmallow mobes

king of foo
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Re: Prices are more reasonable than the Nexus 6

Such as...

What? The 1+2?

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Thanks for the memory: XPoint put under the analyst microscope

king of foo
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Is he related to

Mr Gutsy?

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Microsoft Office 2016 for Windows: The spirit of Clippy lives on

king of foo
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Re: Excel Co Authoring or not?

"Boo!" Isn't what most people end up "screaming in every office I've ever worked in... We can't be trying hard enough to scare them... Someone send them a DIY rasppi clock...

Does it still hide temp files/autosaves in a different hidden folder in each version of outlook? With the filepath hidden away in the registry...

Does it still "assume" (incorrectly) data types in CSV files (scientific notation FTW)?

Does it stop muppets from saving xslm, xls and xlsb files with VBA projects as xlsx yet?

...I'll stop there, but I have many questions...

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king of foo
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Too bad...

I just managed to persuade mgt to sign off an upgrade from 2007 to 2010. I'll never see this.

I specifically requested 64bit, they gave me 32bit. Wannabe bofh on the helldesk won't know what hit him when I find the time for vengeance...

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This article does not exist

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Indianapolis man paints his ball every day – for FORTY YEARS

king of foo
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Re: I'll raise a glass to eccentricity

I, too, was picturing a different kind of ball... and planning a new weekend activity that both self and the missus could enjoy...

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It's alive! Farmer hides neglected, dust-clogged server between walls

king of foo
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Re: Disappointed

...or hatching ickle chickens

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Microsoft puts arm round Salesforce, pair skip gaily into the cloud

king of foo
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Re: "Lightning"

Michael Jackson? Um, can you be a little more specific please? The first thing that springs to mind doesn't involve skin pigments. I'm channelling a horrific blend of Bill Cosby, a PG tips advert and sesame street. shudder

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FAIL: Windows 10 bulk patch produces INFINITE CRASH LOOP

king of foo
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Re: And this, children...

pool's closed...

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Return of the Jedi? StarWars.co.uk bod to fight the Empire (Disney)

king of foo
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Re: "A notice to appeal...

Venn diagram:

Rich people

Starwars fans

Hate Disney

Like underdogs

Feeling charitable

I don't do social media, but this sounds like something that could be crowdfunded and a B or C list celeb that wants some attention could get behind...

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If you installed Windows 10 and like privacy, you checked the defaults, right? Oh dear

king of foo
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Re: It's pretty bad... Really

more info here

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king of foo
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It's pretty bad... Really

While I was upgrading my laptop in the early hours of sunday am I figured "why not google win10 privacy while I wait", spoke a fair amount of French, then spent a good half hour tweaking settings/registry values. What annoyed the hell out of me was the need to disable processes and edit the registry (home premium) to stop some of the reporting home.

Thinking of friends/fam I'm hoping some kind soul will write a nice little "freeeedurm" script to simplify the process, or perhaps an "app" to demonstrate in simple terms (traffic lights) to your average Joe public exactly how exposed they are/what is being collected, with a "protect me squire!" button...

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Wait, STOP: Are you installing Windows 10 or RANSOMWARE?

king of foo
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I could say the same thing about condoms... the human race should be long gone!

People must REALLY value their porn collections... what troubles me is exactly what it is people have to lose... Family photos/videos?

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Windows 10: A SYSADMIN speaks his brains – and says MEH

king of foo
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Diarrhoea.

It's better than Windows 8.

That is all.

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BONK! BONK! Windows 10 whack-a-mole – Microsoft still fixing bugs

king of foo
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Re: Business as usual

Or... was that his/her point???

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Choc Factory research shows users just don't get security

king of foo
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MAC + cheese?

I like the idea of associating pictures to other pictures instead of using text. E.g. 'monkey in blue hat' = sad so eats something sweet to cheer himself up. Sorry we are all out of banana splits but you can have a 'chocolate fudge sundae' - user is presented with 50 images to map to a choc fudge sundae, of which a fair % are very similar to the correct answer, however there is only 1 right answer. Sundae = like Sunday, which is really the first day of the week but we think of it as the last... days of the week have their own logic; we can count upwards from 1 or 0 so it could, relate to 4 possible numbers; 0167 - this forms a pin code secondary password. Today is Friday... Friday is an "up" day, meaning the pin numbers are sorted lowest to highest. On a Monday they might be sorted high to low.

The Mac address of the device I'm using has not been associated with the service/application I'm trying to use so before I get any further I get an email and an SMS. Clicking the link in the email requests that a 4 digit code from the SMS be entered to register the device and gain entry.

I must have stolen this idea from somewhere/perhaps multiple different trains of thought - is anyone aware of any proper research?

Yes, this wouldn't work for the visually impaired however variants using noises/songs/text could be optional.

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Ad slingers beware! Google raises Red Screen of malware Dearth

king of foo
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Re: Ads in the Pot meet Kettle world.

Better the devil you know?

I don't think this sounds like a Google Mafia situation... Nice website ya got dere... shame if someone blocked it...

More like Ew! Malware peddler! Keep out of my browser! And take yer filthy flash with ya...

Pretty sure I used to have a plugin that replaced all ads with cat gifs - similar principle, but only for dodgy ads. I'm in favour of this. Just need to trust that they don't abuse this...

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FLASH MUST DIE, says Facebook security chief

king of foo
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Ads, a-ah...

So far as I can tell, flash is mostly used for adverts nowadays (by el reg to boot)

Ming: Get off my planet!

Steven 'Flash' Gordon: The sooner, the better.

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Oi, idiot fanbois. DON'T buy this gun-shaped iPhone case, mmkay?

king of foo
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Looks like an arse to me on mobile. The image only scales so you can see the gun/case when you click it.

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Silly Google's Photos app labelled BLACK PEOPLE as GORILLAS

king of foo
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Re: Google Photos labelled me Cunt

Was it accurate?

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Apple apes Microsoft with iPhone BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH

king of foo
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Re: SUE THEM !!!

What shade exactly? Royal?

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Taylor Swift boycotts Apple Music over no-pay-for-plays shocker

king of foo
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Re: xbox music, anyone?

Forbes brands: Evil Microsoft is worth $69.3B vs apple's $145.3B... Google is ranked 3rd at $65.6B

So, MS' closest competitor is Google (and wow is it close!).

MS can easily play the "good guy" here - it's the only economically viable play - this does not mean they care/are any better than apple. Doesn't 'iPhone' make more money than all of MS combined? That's why zune/win8/Nokia epic fail. I haven't any stats on 'xbox music' but I'm pretty sure it will be laughable when compared to iTunes... or even YouTube...

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king of foo
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Re: Usual Apple greed

Milk.

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DON’T add me to your social network, I have NO IDEA who you are

king of foo
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Re: Oh yes!

I've recently been asked to add "like" functionality to our company's salesforce.com deployment. My "fuck off and die" button was just going to be a red cross, but now I'm feeling creative...

What icon, exactly, best expresses this sentiment?

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US mega-hack: White House orders govt IT to do what it should have done in the first place

king of foo
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Honeytrap?

Call me jaded, but...

This sounds too daft to be "true"; meaning perhaps the US gov wants to catch some of them dang hackers by advertising an easy target, encouraging poor judgement re self protection on the hackers' part. I suspect the target isn't that easy... and full of malware/other nasties intended to identify and track the 'enemy'.

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BBC, Facebook steer users to vuln-afflicted Unity Web Player plugin

king of foo
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Re: The view from Unity...

Tough call...

A) Spend time/effort fixing issue with plugin that will be obsolete in a few months.

B) Try to rush replacement, hoping issue won't cause too much damage in the meantime.

I'd likely be using door number 2. I'd probably be trying to keep quiet about it as well! But ignoring a bug hunter results in bad publicity so they should have opened a dialogue with the guy at the very least imho.

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Fanbois designing Windows 10 – where's it going to end?

king of foo
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Re: Avoiding people with clipboards and television cameras is a very basic skill

Sounds like you missed an opportunity to show the world your deathstarfishes.

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Windows 10 upgrade ADWARE forces its way on to Windows 7 and 8.1

king of foo
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Re: I'm confused

Jesus definitely existed.

He brought us the Jesus phone.

He died and was resurrected in 2009. In 2011 he "ascended".

So sayeth people who drink tea in coffee shops...

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Win Phone to outgrow smartmobe market for next four years

king of foo
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Re: Bovine Excrement.

The interesting thing about "forecasts" and "predictions" is that 4 times out of 7 you can just make up the numbers and everything looks plausible and well researched. I spend most of my working life looking at and composing bollocks like this.

Me, I know next to nothing about selling mobile phones, but bollocks? Yes. If you ever have any testicle related problems I'm your man. The girls in the office are always complaining I don't have any framed photos on my desk so feel free to send me selfies...

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king of foo
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Bovine Excrement.

Apple to LOSE market share

To Microsoft

Re SmartPhones?

Ha. Ha ha ha. A-hahahahahaha.

I will neither buy an apple nor a ms smartphone, but this is insane.

I confidently predict that the "other" category will take share from android, as will apple, but windows will continue to flop. Yes they will sell more but because the market is expanding not because the tide turns. Unless they do something clever to win over the corporate/business market.

Also, the apple numbers look a little low, but I reckon there's a thriving 2nd hand market that isn't being covered. Androids likely end up in landfill or "man drawers" more frequently than being sold but every iPhone owner I know has sold their old model on when a new one comes out.

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Microsoft: Cortana not exclusive to Windows – it loves Android, iOS too

king of foo
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Re: nice... "cross platform" approach

nice

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king of foo
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nice...

Fully embracing the "cross platform" approach, I see. Is this a "new" Microsoft?

Perhaps windows 9 won't be shite after all...

The thing is, they're skipping straight to 10 aren't they...

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German watchdog rips off Facebook's thumbs after online fracas

king of foo
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Re: Good, but not quite right: about bloody time someone did something

Are you talking about doing something like the "this site uses cookies bla bla bla ignore my techno gabble I'm reputable because I'm warning you about something no need to read me further, oops I forgot to add a cross/close me link, oh well never mind it's not as if I'm taking up half the sodding page and won't go away.... leave this website now or I will continue to annoy you" that pops up on every ***** website you visit?

That's almost as bad as the Fwitted JavaScript popups inviting you to download an "app" (a shit version of the website, with missing features but twice the privacy invasion) or "join us/subscribe/register for a free account so we can sell your info to the king of Nigeria because he has a lucrative opportunity you may be interested in" before you've had a chance to read the bloody page.

I think the punish bad behaviour ethos is a good one, and gets the ball rolling re future punishment of other similar practices.

I don't use 'social media', it uses me.

I like the idea of a "free" internet. As in speech. In order to accomplish this we need policing, not censorship.

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Private cloud has a serious image problem

king of foo
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Re: re: why would the toaster need to talk to the 'fridge'?

Because we are Borg

Bjorn: "I enjoy fashion."

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Wi-Fi was MEANT to be this way: Antennas and standards, 802.11 style

king of foo
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Re: 802.11 ay?

I'm holding out for '802.11 yay'

I don't do alpha testing.

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School's in for Chromebooks, Google's the top swot in class

king of foo
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Noooooo.....

I can hear stallman's wailing from here!

By hey, at least they're cheap AND conditioning our kids to be good little products...

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Heroic German rozzers rescue innocent lamb from sordid brothel

king of foo
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breaking news : european dna

New evidence suggests the Welsh are direct descendants of the Germans...

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Hacker uses Starbucks INFINITE MONEY for free CHICKEN SANDWICH

king of foo
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the moral of the story

If you find a bug, and a company doesn't have a bounty scheme in place, there is such a thing as a free lunch.

Now eat, and drink, and be merry. And tell all your friends...

...because they don't deserve the benefit of your goodwill and will likely act like twats instead of being appreciative.

Sometimes you have to do bad to do good...

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City of birth? Why password questions are a terrible idea

king of foo
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Re: Even worse

Durchfall ?

Because I can't spell it in Englisch... despite being Schottisch.

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