* Posts by king of foo

334 posts • joined 2 Oct 2012

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Edu-apps may be STALKING YOUR KIDS, feds warn

king of foo
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Re: Where the buck stops

How about these brain numbing soap operas take a break from murder, theft, adultery etc for an episode or three and highlight the dangers of those ipads you bought your kids this Xmas. I don't know; maybe a RATter stalks a teenage girl and kills her by bashing her over the head with a surface pro 3, or one of the protagonists hatches a scheme to defraud and there's a scene with gchq bods looking through all their selfies on their iPhone and finding their accomplices by scraping their Facebook data and catching them using their phones' GPS.

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UK air traffic bods deny they 'skimped' on IT investment after server mega-fail

king of foo
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Re: "Old" works for me

If the 20+ year old tech has been 'maintained' and 'refined' over those 20 years then arguably it is not "old" and I wholeheartedly agree with the above. However, if someone wrote the source code in the 90s and it hasn't been updated in 15+ years then someone needs to be beaten to death with their own 56k modem.

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Goes like the blazes: Amazon Fire HDX 8.9 late 2014 edition

king of foo
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Re: Wake me up...

No.

That is all.

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king of foo
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Re: Wake me up...

Try paying for a mail client.

I agree that you shouldn't need to but, yeah, Microsoft... Woo.

I use "Mobile Access For Outlook OWA" on android. It only cost a few quid and has been regularly updated and gone from strength to strength. Would recommend. Devs were quick to respond to my emails identifying issues.

Def works with exchange 2007+2010, not sure what else.

Like it so much I'd happily pay the 3 or 4 quid all over again.

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king of foo
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Re: Single page view ?

Replace the www. with m.

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Roll up, come see the BOOMING HACKER BAZAAR!

king of foo
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Re: not naughty enough...

Or they could pool their spare cash together and hire a crack commando unit sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit... If such "a team" existed I'm sure the place to find them would be one of these bazaars...

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king of foo
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not naughty enough...

These bazaars need to do some really naughty stuff before the police will do anything about them.

You know, like torrenting the next star wars movie. Murderers, rapists, drug barons, PAH, it's those filthy pirates we need to stop!

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Microsoft, rivals together fight US govt's cloud data snatch

king of foo
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in other news...

Microsoft patents privacy...

Apple counter by claiming Steve jobs invented it in 1987.

Google look on in green eyed wonder.

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Senator: Backdoor for the Feds is a backdoor for hackers

king of foo
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Re: Hooray for progress!!

How about we "rename" stuff like this to make it easier for people to "get".

E.g. backdoor = arsehole

"The NSA want to 'tunnel in' through our arseholes to find and catch terrorists"

(So that's where they've been hiding! Might find some WMDs in there too while they're at it...)

The tabloids would love this.

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It's nearly 2015 – and your Windows PC can still be owned by a Visual Basic script

king of foo
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Re: Users want bling

Eye Cancy? Is that what you get when you buy your contact lenses online from a supplier with their distribution centre in Chernobyl?

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king of foo
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gra'ma

Naa, bruvs, u gotsa git daaan wit dem wurdz peeps a speekinz oan streetz. Litracys 4 foos, innit. Y bovva lernin tingz wen textin an twitta getz u.

Bombaclaaaaats!

My A*'s in English Language and English Literature aren't looking particularly relevant now Mrs Simpson... YOU LIED!

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This Christmas, demand the right to a silent night

king of foo
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Re: sometimes...

Lusty, I know this is completely unrelated to the above, but are you an Argonian maid, perchance?

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king of foo
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sometimes...

...it's OK to give shit "service".

It's my weapon against the "disrespectfully disorganised". You know, that senior manager that needs X by 6pm, and only bothers to call you at 5pm, even though it's been one of their "actions" from a meeting that took place 2 months ago.

These mofos guilt trip you into giving up your free time to help them, then proceed to use you as a patsy to explain away any delays or problems that could not be resolved in their miniscule timeframe.

Their disrespect injures not only you, but the service you are able to provide for those respectful enough to give you realistic deadlines.

Their success is fueled their own incompetence. The more you break your back to help them, the worse they get.

Back in the good old days we recognised these people for what they were and "managed" them.

Now we have to worry about kpi's and other such nonsense.

My beautiful, organised chaos doesn't work in an environment populated by the disrespectfully disorganised. It falls over. I myself appear disorganised and disrespectful.

I don't blame our dependence upon technology for this, I blame poor judgement on behalf of HR and recruitment agencies; filling our senior management ranks with narcissistic wankers who in turn give their ignorant friends and family jobs...

Wow, I guess my bad mood from yesterday hasn't improved!!!

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Yotaphone 2: The two-faced pocket-stroker with '100 hours' batt life

king of foo
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Re: Looks really nice.

You mean this ?

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UK slaps 25 per cent 'Google Tax' on tech multinationals

king of foo
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Re: They should pay tax here

Um, remind me what the government spend all that tax on again...

I pay road tax, yet potholes.

I pay income tax, yet unemployment.

Etc.

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Evernote aims at corporate market with new chat feature

king of foo
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no.

Businesses don't like chatty things. You will use your spam ridden email with the 500mb mailbox and 10mb outgoing size limit and your poorly deployed SharePoint on your XP laptop and you will like it or so help me that laptop will take another 10 mins to boot...

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MEPs want 'unbiased search', whatever that is – they're not sure either

king of foo
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Re: unbiased results?

It's called doublethink

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king of foo
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Re: The solution is obvious!

Exactly. However I would counter with the alternative, yet equally compelling name,

Ni!

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Man asks internet for $1k for pebbles. INTERNET SAYS YES

king of foo
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My ancestors are laughing at this insanity. Must be the work of sassenachs. Putting stones in your drink? Whatever next? Worms? Ha.

Wait, wut?

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Brit smut slingers shafted by UK censors' stiff new stance

king of foo
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Re: Normality

Some people don't get sarcasm... Have a thumbs up

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Feds dig up law from 1789 to demand Apple, Google decrypt smartphones, slabs

king of foo
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Re: king of fools bad != stupid

I object to ill thought out laws that do nothing but sacrifice our freedoms in order to make politicians look good to the misguided/misinformed in the run up to the next election by making unsubstantiated claims.

I'd like to see some stats published re the number of crimes solved using the contents of unencrypted personal computers. If it's a high number, and the crimes were serious, I may be persuaded to change my stance on this, but I'd rather have some criminals that are a little harder (but by no means impossible) to catch than live in an Orwellian dystopia with people in positions of authority able to stop me on the street and say "papiere, bitte", without the "bitte". Yes, yes, Godwin's law...

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king of foo
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Re: Next in the product lineup, remote self-destruct.

Hmmm... I'm sure the bofh could make good use of this in a corporate setting...

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king of foo
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Re: With a warrant

Genius. Like a "dead man's switch" for your data.

I wonder...

1. Dead man's switch app

2. C4

3. ???

4. Profit

...might be a tad messy, but would solve the related issue of overcrowding in prisons. Less pickpockets anyway...

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king of foo
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bad != stupid

It seems to me that the majority of folk think criminals are thick.

In reality many will be of above average intellect.

A clever, dangerous, criminal is highly unlikely to store incriminating evidence on a smartphone.

So what value is left on a device? Selfies with the mutilated corpse? The phone company can provide SMS and phone call records. It has to be email and im they're after, but a smart crim won't use anything that leaves behind a trace on the handset.

So they must be after halfwits. Surely there are other ways to catch someone like that.

Or are the people requesting these powers of below average intellect?

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Sinclair is back with the Spectrum Vega ... just as rubbish as the ZX

king of foo
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now I know

...what I'm getting for Xmas next year...

Last year someone got me a rather crappy looking sonic the hedgehog "plug it in the telly thing".

We got absolutely hammered and completed sonic 1, 2 and 3 in a single sitting. It was epic. Then it broke.

Wow, I'm now imagining an epic chuckie egg session...

Oh

My

God

http://torinak.com/qaop#!chuckieegg

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Huawei: 'Nobody made any money in Windows Phone'

king of foo
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Re: A money burning exercise

Absolutely. Corporate lock in. Massively underdeveloped area in which improvement is needed.

MS; I know you were rocking it back in the day, but you kept on dancing to Abba right through the 80s, 90s and 00s. True, there was a bit of a revival and you briefly looked like you could be kinda cool when you were buying all the young uns drinks, but you always had that 'dirty pedo uncle' look in your eye...

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UK cops: Give us ONE journo's phone records. Vodafone: Take the WHOLE damn database!

king of foo
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woopsy

Yes, I believe you... by accident you say. Uhu.

A very convenient way to give the police what they want with the minimum fuss and effort.

As an analyst, I often do something a bit like this when responding to a query because the specific question is never complex enough. In order to get to the real truth you often need to ignore a specific brief and try to fathom and understand the true requirement, then answer that instead.

Often the recipient is too stupid to see what you've done and claims you are giving them "too much" or "that isn't what I asked for". Recognising this, then ignoring future requests is often a good way to make then go away.

But I don't do this with sensitive data on "people" (e.g. salary benchmarking). That's just wrong. And if I was tempted, I'd merely present my findings at an anonymised, aggregated level, never the source data.

This smells to me of an intentional act being explained away as a mistake. There was definitely motive. I'd want an independent investigation, and perhaps to consider the prosecution of both parties involved. Prosecution of senior directors. An ombudsman needs to have oversight of this. I can see a junior clerk being sweet talked; "just give us it all if it's a pain to filter it down to the right person" - I've successfully used this tactic myself to obtain pricing data for competitors using the same supplier as me. This is a little bit naughty, admittedly. The police hold a position of extreme trust so if they are grifting like this... Hmmmm...

If the police are abusing their powers we need to strip those powers from them, not give them more. Theresa, are you listening, bitch?

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Apple surges in on the BYOD wave

king of foo
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web/servs

Gone are the days when you needed a windows PC with ie6 to interact with company systems.

And about bloody time too.

I pity anyone left with the burden of supporting hardware specific abandonware.

I like this trend towards uber simple end user experience; it means less phone calls asking where the "any" key is. "Just mash the screen with your face" works just as well.

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All aboard the Poo Bus! Ding ding, route Number Two departing

king of foo
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Re: 10,000 passengers a month?

Yes, but roughly half of them will encounter the mystery of the invisible poo

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king of foo
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silent but violent

Now cyclists will wake up in a&e not only with broken bones, but smelling faintly of shit...

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GCHQ and Cable and Wireless teamed as Masters of the Internet™

king of foo
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Re: money

Apologies, my French is restricted to 4 letter words these days (like "bank", Mr Bryant) and I spent my lessons at school smoking and trying to get into a certain girl's knickers instead of actually attending. Thankfully I have never once been to France so it was a decision well made, even if I did fail miserably!

...and thanks, anti-troll defence league, I hope you have a lovely weekend,

Oh reservoir (full of tears of regret), moan Amy (to someone else's embrace)

I wonder if she's still single, if not I might be trying to figure out if it's cherchez la femme or le femme...

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king of foo
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money

This really pisses me off. We've been in a global recession due to banks, who are supposed to be regulated by government, being greedy arseholes, and then bailed out by taxpayer money... and then we find out that as well as this happening, and big corps dodging tax, the bloody g men have been spaffing millions more tax payers money away every month to spy up someone else's skirt!

You'll be telling me they've been protecting pedos next... oh, wait, what???

Vive le revolution

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Nexus 7 fandroids tell of salty taste after sucking on Google's Lollipop

king of foo
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Re: Is this viz?

Agreed.

Ew,just ew.

...but all in good taste

Er...

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Microsoft adds video offering to Office 365. Oh NOES, you'll need Adobe Flash

king of foo
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Re: Security?

Ebola goes optical...

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Patch NOW! Microsoft slings emergency bug fix at Windows admins

king of foo
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Re: ALL YOUR XP BELONG US?

It's worse. He's wearing a Wales rugby shirt...

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Anonymous ‪hacks the Ku Klux Klan after Ferguson‬ threats

king of foo
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...and don't forget a glass of wine for the lad-ettes...

My glasses are by no means rose tinted, but I find it hard to believe that the KKK is still "a thing" in the tail end of 2015.

I wonder... could Anonymous switch KKK medical subscriptions for chemical castration pills?

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DEATH fails to end mobile contract: Widow forced to take HUBBY's ASHES into shop

king of foo
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system works perfectly

Muppets entering data confirmed to be muppets.

This happened to me with virgin mobile. I cancelled the contract, then a full month after the payments should have stopped I cancelled the direct debit.

They set up a brand new contact on a new number after I cancelled and ported my number away to another provider. This is what was billed for. Then, even though they had my original number, didn't think that calling me on it might resolve the issue of payment immediately.

At best, muppets. At worst, scam artists. Damaged my credit rating as well.

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Sarong it's right: Coining it in Thailand without a visa

king of foo
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pre-shattered dreams

I often wonder what working life would be like sitting by/on a beach with my laptop on my, well, on my lap. Swapping the sea breeze for the air con, the waves for the chatter of work colleagues, the calm for the stress.

Then I wake up; my pasty Scottish skin would burn. My laptop battery would die every 2 hours. It would rain. There would be a tornado or hurricane. I'd get paranoid; wondering what the locals were saying. My phone signal would cut in and out. My internet connection would be crap. My paradise would be a nightmare of aftersun and mosquitoes. And I'd get an apocalyptic dose of the shits.

Then, to top it all off, someone from India would poach my clients, working harder, and probably better, for less. I'd end up working for pennies, barely scraping a living. Then my laptop would die and I'd struggle to find a replacement or get it fixed. This would happen mid project and I'd lose my best client.

Real life sucks.

Sorry to blast the fun out of this, I truly hope people are enjoying "the dream" but I'll take my dreary Monday mornings...

Unless someone offers me a job on the beach... with guaranteed work every day, and corporate sun cream. I'll start tomorrow...

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Post-pub nosh neckfiller: The MIGHTY Scotch egg

king of foo
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Re: Breakfast balls

You may need to revisit the name, otherwise females (and certain males) might file this in the same folder as "birthday blowjobs".

This is directly related to the source article as well; in certain bedrooms north of the border the phrase "git her gams roond these scotch eggs, hen" is quite common.

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Is your kid ADDICTED to web porn? Twitter? Hint: Don't blame the internet

king of foo
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Call of Booty

I suspect the sex, drugs and alcohol may have more to do with the grin than unbridled access to the tinterwebs. Although I'm sure he posts pictures on the twatbook afterwards...

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Behold the Lumia 535 NOTkia: Microsoft wipes Nokia brand from mobes

king of foo
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FINALLY

it looks like they've stuffed a decent amount of ram in there!

I have no doubt this will be a decent bit of kit. On specs and price alone this looks like a potential android beater at the 'gutter' end.

Would I buy one? Hells no, but I can see friends and relatives using these happily. I'd like a play to see for myself, but it would be really difficult to take this spec and screw it up. My only real negative feedback re budget lumias has been the lack of ram; this fixes that issue. Now they just need to drop the cheesy adverts... and maybe give them away for free with windows 8 computers by way of an apology...

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GOD particle MAY NOT BE GOD particle: Scientists in shock claim

king of foo
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Porky

Pig's Bison?

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Modern Panic V: A world of H.R. Giger, spunking unicorns and deeply unsettling puppets

king of foo
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Re: I'm not looking/sounding quite so weird now...

My word of the week is "thing"

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king of foo
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I'm not looking/sounding quite so weird now...

I don't get this "art" thing. I can appreciate pretty things, and not so pretty things, but some of this shit is just beyond me.

This, coming from someone who proudly sported a purple Mohawk in his "youth" and has read and watched far too many things.

One of the first things I ever read as a child always springs immediately to mind whenever I see/hear/read this kind of thing; Hans Christian Anderson's The Emperor's New Clothes...

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Blizzard shows off Overwatch – yet another guardians of Earth FPS

king of foo
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Re: accent

They need to watch this

A tour of the British Isles in accents: http://youtu.be/-8mzWkuOxz8

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Got a STRAP-ON? Remember to TAKE IT OFF at WORK

king of foo
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Re: re. Rampant Rabbi, etc.

I now know where I'm buying ALL my Christmas presents!

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All but full-fat MS Office to be had on iPads, Droidenslabben for NOWT

king of foo
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fab

I for one look forward to comparing this to wps office on android.

The article didn't mention macros. Does anyone know if they will be supported (in a limited capacity)? If so that's awesome news for anyone that has to support finance or works in B.I., if not then well, it's not a shock.

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Microsoft's TV product placement horror: CNN mistakes Surface tabs for iPAD STANDS

king of foo
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bing it

I don't know what they were smoking when they came up with the name "bing" but I want some.

I still find it ridiculous and it's even more absurd when you hear it coming out of someone's mouth.

Bing makes me think "Bong"; maybe I'm right about the smoking...

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The Great Smartphone Massacre: Android bloodbath gathers pace

king of foo
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Re: Dear Sony.

I'm in danger of troll feeding, however a nexus 4 or 5 sim free + sim only deal that only gives you the mins and data you actually need can be cheaper. Ask yourself how many of those perishable mins you don't use every month just to get that more desirable hardware. It's a con.

I got really angry when my granny's pay as you go mins disappeared and she started being asked to top up "every month" to get the same average cost per theoretical minute/text. She used to pay for what she used, when she used it, and a £10 top up could last her months and months. Thieving swines. Then the contracts went from 12 to 18 to 24 months. Try to find a 12m contract that isn't through a 3rd party... then give it 7 days... I guarantee someone from the actual operator will contact you and offer to swap you over to a "standard" deal that somehow saves you money... but costs more as it's for another 12 months!

When you change your computer you don't change your ISP. Why should mobile devices be any different? When did mobile operators stop selling good service and start flogging hardware? Coverage can be shocking, especially on lower tariffs. I'm hoping and praying for massive change in this space. The death of phones 4u should be a wakeup call to consumers that something isn't quite right...

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king of foo
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Re: Google dives headlong into the mess

I'm similarly bemused. I have 3 nexus devices and was all for getting a 4th, but these new ones look, well, distinctly non nexus. I'll wait, and wait, for ubuntu. I don't NEED a new shiny, I just want one, like old Mick Jagger says.

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