105 posts • joined Thursday 28th June 2007 00:16 GMT
Best search engine?
"top arachno-boffin Toke Høye"
I think someone's being toking a bit too much. Sheer reefer madness.
Is this some rarely occuring leap month?
"Home Secretary Jacqui Smith ruled the idea out today, citing privacy concerns."
We seem to have two April Fools' Days this year
Pass the bucket
"From Google's new Chrome Experiments project:
I'm not sure whether reading this or drinking a pint of salted water would be a faster way to induce vomiting. And some people still think Google is cool?
@ Simon Rockman
Having visited, lived and worked in more third world countries than I care to think about I know well the situations you describe. What I was saying is that countries with so-called safe banking systems also now starting to understand how easy it is to lose out too. Try this article in today's Grauniad for size:
"Britain's most senior police officer with responsibility for public order raised the spectre of a return of the riots of the 1980s, with people who have lost their jobs, homes or savings becoming "footsoldiers" in a wave of potentially violent mass protests."
I'm almost happy that I have no savings to lose to the criminals running the banking system.
"Without access to banks they are very vulnerable."
As vulnerable as people *with* access to banks?
@JonB and Mike Moyle
I was referring to *professional* songwriters of the Tin Pan Alley type and I didn't say the zillions of kids producing music at home were creating "wonderful complex and intellectually inspiring songs every 30 seconds" but they are producing music and in much larger quantities than "commercial" music. More power to them too.
@ Mike Moyle
Yeah, yeah, that's all well and good but the point is that loads of kids are making music and giving it away for free already. Will they produce a "Beethoven's Ninth"? Unlikely but not many professional songwriters have either. At the last count it was one, Beethoven. And no doubt his first ever piece was written by him sitting alone in a room at home, just like the kids.
@ both of you
You've really both missed my main points:
1. Music composition, performance, production, arrangement, mastering and distribution has now been democratised by cheap and ubiquitous technology.
2. Record labels aren't really required unless someone wants to be a Top 20 puppet.
3. Music sales are more likely to be affected by changes in spending habits than illegal downloading.
4. The music biz still doesn't have a clue about life in the 21st century.
Pirate icon, just to annoy a few people.
The songwriters' worst enemy is...
...the song writers themselves because they are living in the past. The glory days of professional song writers are largely gone, certainly in the terms of the old music biz. The problem has nothing to do with file sharing. If some kid downloads 100 songs a week that doesn't mean 100 sales have been lost because that kid could never afford to buy them all anyway. The industry needs to think of file sharing as marketing; getting the songs listened to by a wider audience.
On top of that, music can now be written, performed, produced, arranged, mastered and distributed by kids in their bedrooms. Or DJs. Or anyone with a good idea, some talent and minimal kit. There is more music out there now than there ever was because there are more people making it.
If the same amount of money was spent on music today as it was say 20 years ago, it would be diluted as there are more artists chasing the same pot of cash. As it happens there is even less money available because da yoof of today doesn't just spend their money on music and beer anymore. There are DVDs, games, mobile phone bills, etc., that suck up a large proportion of available income.
One day the music biz will wake up and get a clue. If not it will go the way of the dinosaur and the 8-Track cartridge.
Paris, because she knows about musicianship. I once saw her playing the pink oboe in a vid.
Don't worry about a few snowflakes in Blighty
The snow will be gone in no time. Meanwhile down here in Aus we have +40C of dry hell in the south with 37 dead from the heat. At the same time there areas larger than the UK under floodwater in the north. Oh, and a cyclone or two.
Enjoy the fluffy white stuff while you can.
Paris, because...er, just because.
...but this will be the last straw for even your most ardent supporters. You are so voted out at the next election.
Sayer returned to the Lucky Country...
"Australia is a lucky country, run by second-rate people who share its luck."
And, it seems, being entertained by them too.
Mine's the stupid clown outfit.
Only one word for this...
I'm probably not the first to notice but...
...Bono is an anagram of "O nob".
No word of a lie...
The first time I visited Aus the passport officer looked at my landing card* and directed me to the quarantine desk. I was greeted with this:
"G'day. Mr Coat, do you have any manure on your footwear?"
"I'm sorry," I replied and not being being in the best of moods after 36 hours of BA hell added: "the travel agent said I only needed a business visa."
No one does a stony glare quite like an official that has just had the piss taken.
*The landing card has a question and tick box that asks if one has been on a farm within the last six months and I was stupid/honest enough to say yes.
I'm surprised it lasted 17 years
Towards the end of the previous century I bought some Dell boxes that came with rather spiffy monitors. The tubes were Trinitron that were made in a Sony factory in Wales. These were then shipped to Finland and placed in cases in a Nokia factory. From there they were sent to Dell in Ireland and then whole package was shipped to me in London.
No amount of EU subsidies was going to make that exercise in stupidity last forever. I'm afraid the Celtic Tiger was built on dreams, not realities.
Mine's the one with the subsidy under one arm and Dell pig under the other.
Whenever I read something by a poli about the Net...
...the following words spring to mind:
out, talking, his, of, arse.
Rearrange into a well-known phrase or saying.
Where's the complete-and-utter-twat icon when you need one?
Oh, Sarah Bee
You said "normalcy". It just ruined my Christmas.
Wot? No Abba?
"Yesterday, several members of the Swedish entertainment industry came out in support of the new measure, including musician Per Gessle, actor Mikael Persbrandt and Sweden-based British film director Colin Nutley."
You couldn't make it up
The govt creates endless databases and then passes a law that removes pen testing tools from the sysadmins' toolboxes.
Where's the "utter genius" icon when you need one?
To quote Peter Cook...
...this man is a proven lawyer.
"I guess now the stereotypical Tor user will be tinfoil-hat-wearing, terrorist-attack-planning, CP-trading *AND* Australian."
That'd be a tin-foil hat with tin-foil corks then?
Mine's the Driza-Bone with a VPN in the pocket.
It has already started
A teacher from a school in New South Wales has reported that her school network can no longer view one of the anti-censorship campaign sites:
I'll get my coat with VPN4ME on the back.
Douglas Adams was right
It's time to haul out the words of The Wise One for some fresh air again. Just substitute "govtard" for "newsreader"
"Newsreaders still feel it is worth a special and rather worrying mention if, for instance, a crime was planned by people 'over the Internet.' They don't bother to mention when criminals use the telephone or the M4, or discuss their dastardly plans 'over a cup of tea,' though each of these was new and controversial in their day."
All mirrors, no smoke
Or your ISP's mirror site, if you have one.
Please no, not again
If anyone is unfortunate enough to come across another less-than-smart person from the colonies that insists they "saved our asses" please point them at this:
Saved our asses? I didn't even realise our odd-toed ungulate load-bearing friends were even in danger.
I'll get me donkey jacket.
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