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* Posts by Amorous Cowherder

601 posts • joined 5 Jul 2012

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YARR! Pirates walk the plank: DMCA magnets sink in Google results

Amorous Cowherder
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Joke

Kids today don't know what it was like in the scene back in the day! Tch!

Fair enough. That's the way it used to be many, many moons ago when the wide blue yonder of the connected world first opened up to we home users with our 2400 baud modems to BBS's. It could take a week or two to track down a good "source" and then you'd be forced to "bring a bottle" to the party, so to speak, or you wouldn't get in!

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WAITER! There's a Flappy Bird in my Lollipop!

Amorous Cowherder
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There's one in KitKat too

Bang on the Android revision ID several time very fast in About Device tab of Settings. Then click the spinning K a couple of times. Then keep hitting the KitKat logo a few time and a weird screensaver thing starts up showing cartoons of all the previous Android versions.

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French 'terror law' declares WAR on the INTERNET itself, say digi-rights folks

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

"It also gives the government new powers to block websites deemed to “incite” or “glorify” terrorism."

Ah, so if you Frenchies want to know who this Guy Fawkes fella was, you're in for a spell in clinky then!

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Arab States make play for greater government control of the internet

Amorous Cowherder
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Unhappy

Sadly a darn sight less even than that if you've had the "misfortune" to have been born with a uterus!

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FinFisher spyware used to snoop on Bahraini activists, police told

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Yeah but Bahrain is one of the friendly desert countries, the sort that buy all our lovely weapons and torture devices, not one of those nasty ones that only wants to set themselves up to be invaded by our mates in the "special alliance" over the other side of the Atlantic. So it's alright to turn a blind eye to what the nice security services in Bahrain have asked us to help them with!

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Martha Lane Fox: YEUCH! The Internet is MADE by MEN?!?

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Facebook, Apple: LADIES! Why not FREEZE your EGGS? It's on the company!

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: What...the...fuck....

Right!

So you leave the company for whatever reason, what happens to your DNA, so to speak? I take it you have 48 hours to come up with the cash or we dump your eggs in receptionist's fridge for you to come pick up!!

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Facebook's Zuckerberg in EBOLA VIRUS FIGHT: Billionaire battles bug

Amorous Cowherder
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Thumb Up

If he actually coughs up the money he's doing better than most governments, who "pledge" they will send money to help disasters and often time only send about 1% of the sum pledged.

I believe our government here in jolly old Blighty once pledged something like £90m to help with an earthquake appeal, in the end they managed to send a measly £100k!

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U2? 81 million Apple iThing-strokers know a place where the Beats have no shame

Amorous Cowherder
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Dear old "Bonehead"

Didn't U2's "Bonehead" once say something fecking moronic like, "The Pope of software meets the Dali Lama of hardware.", when Bill Gates met Steve Jobs?!

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Get NAS-ty: Reg puts claws to eight four-bay data dumpsters

Amorous Cowherder
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Thumb Up

I still have 2 x ReadyNAS boxes populated with 4x2TB, superb little boxes, been supplying backup and streaming media in our house for close on 5 years now and only blown 1 drive in all that time. Problem is that the number of supported HDs was always limited and to maintain the standby spare HDs I have scratch around for refurbs off eBay, not a pleasant experience!

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NSA spying will shatter the internet, Silicon Valley bosses warn

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

What a waste of time.

Everyone throws up their arms in disgust at the NSA spying debacle...for all of 5 seconds.

Give it until January when the latest z-list celeb will come out as a peadophile or top themselves over a bad marriage and the plebs will have forgotten all about the NSA picking up what Granny had to have operated on last week! It'll only be the fighters of liberty and the IT crowd who will care about the surveillence that's still going on. Come this time next year it will be business as usual, the PRISM servers will be back up and running again and it'll take another Snowden style leak in 5 years time for the whole cycle to repeat.

Joe Public doesn't give a flying monkey's left bollock about IT type stuff. So long as Angry Birds runs the mobile and tablet, Minecraft works on the PC for little Johnny, Mum and Dad can still do their online banking and use Facebook, and Chloe can still play Call of Duty on the PS4, the non-techie public really don't care that much about this "security stuff" for very long, they have too many other distractions in life to worry about it.

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'Bill Gates swallowing bike on a beach' is ideal password say boffins

Amorous Cowherder
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So basically it's a variation of the very old and well tested "loci" memory technique. By making associations to very familar places you can remember very complex pieces of information by "walking a journey" through those places you know, picking up familar objects as you go. Instead with this technique they use famous faces with memorable actions used on everyday, easy to imagine objects.

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Apple KILLS SUPER MARIO. And Zelda. And Sonic

Amorous Cowherder
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Simple arse-covering by Apple

If emulators are running there is a chance you could be naughty boys and girls and download the copyrighted ROMS you need to play the games. Nintendo for example, are notorously litigious and Apple probably doesn't want Nintendo banging in their door demanding financial recompense because Apple's systems allowed people to rip off Nintendo games when Apple could have easily prevented it.

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Gates and Ballmer NOT ON SPEAKING TERMS – report

Amorous Cowherder
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Never a truer word...

Steve Ballmer is made out to be a mouthy baffoon in the Pirates of Silicon Valley film, sadly I think the portrayal is very close to the truth.

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Behind the Facebook DRAG QUEEN CRACKDOWN: 'Anonymity soon!'

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Re: in the category of "what can go wrong" this week....

Their Android app already asks for every permission under the Android sun, so if anyone is stupid enough to put that crap app on their device they've already given old Zuck a shed-load more info that is sane!

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Revealed: Malware that forces weak ATMs to spit out 'ALL THE CASH'

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Re: "32-bit Windows-powered ATM"

Just to cap it off...

"...and ensuring cash machines have up-to-date antivirus protection..."

What an age we live we live in!

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Britain’s snooping powers are 'too weak', says NCA chief

Amorous Cowherder
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Joke

Well I bloody well hope they use them on November 5th this year when you lot all start celebrating and glorifying a terrorist's activities with your fireworks and your bonfires!

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Official: Turing's Bombe BETTER than a Concorde plane

Amorous Cowherder
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Happy

I can't think of Alan Turing without thinking of the radio series Hut 33!

"Yes hello this is Bletchly Park I.T. No Alan, I'm I.T. No, Ian Turnbull! What's the problem Alan? Oh I see. Have you tried turning it off and on again Alan? Yes, the off switch. Is it working now? OK, bye Alan!"

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Chap runs Windows 95 on Android Wear

Amorous Cowherder
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OK, kudos to him he's young and wants to do something cool with technology and fair play him, if he was my kid I'd be proud of him. However running Win95 inside DosBox is hardly groundbreaking, there's plenty of guides out there that will walk you through doing it.

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Windows 10's 'built-in keylogger'? Ha ha, says Microsoft – no, it just monitors your typing

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Calm The F**k Down!

Why is anyone surprised by this? It's an alpha/beta what do you expect? I'm not a massive fan of MS but if it's beta and the EULA ( which we always read don't we! ) states "We will spy on you while you play with this pre-release so we know if it's working or not.", where's the problem?

If I get a beta of any software I expect somewhere to have to "pay" somehow for getting early access, this is simply the payment for playing with a pre-release, you have to tell them if it's any good, either directly or indirectly by them spying on you.

What's all this crap about "Hacker's Dream"? FFS! They don't need this piss-poor key-logger from MS, they have enough of their own and probably more sophisticated key-logging tools, all they need is a pillock willing and ready to run email attachments or click on links from porn sites that promise to "Clean Your Infected Machine"!

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Yahoo servers? SHELLSHOCKED? by Bash?

Amorous Cowherder
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Pint

No! We! Are! Not! Trying! To! Milk! This! For! Publicity! Purposes! Cos! Google! And! Even! Bing! Are! Beating! Us! In! The! Search! Game! And! All! We! Have! Left! Worth! Anything! Is! Flickr!

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You don't have to be mad to work at Apple but....

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: so

"unhappiness=success"

Well it's worked out pretty well for most rock stars over the last 50 odd years!

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Amorous Cowherder
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Re: TO THE MAX!

Stress can be a great motivator, it can get you really enthused and give you get-up-an-go. However, too much for too long, just like anything in life, and your brain quickly melts and next thing you're on gardening leave ( if you above middle management ) or out on your ear as a burned out basket case.

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So long Lotus 1-2-3: IBM ceases support after over 30 years of code

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

I had a fully boxed version of DOS v2.1 complete with copy protected floppies, manuals and silly little stickers! Threw it in the recycling about 2 years ago, along with a boxed copy of dBase IV ( yep the one in the big beige box with the 2 or 3 ring bound manuals) and finally a copy of DataEase 4 for DOS.

First IT "job" I had as spotty little 14 year old was helping my Dad install Concurrent DOS 386 with DataEase running on top of it! DataEase and my Dad, it's their fault I ended up as a DBA by trade!

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Windows 10: One for the suits, right Microsoft? Or so one THOUGHT

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: testing procedure.

"I felt much shame as a techie when i had to google how to turn off my god damn (win8) computer.."

After 25 years in IT, coding and admin on Windows and Unix, even mainframe systems and yet...my 9 year old daughter had to show me how to shut down my new Win8 install! Oh that's shame and humiliation you never full recover from!

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Amorous Cowherder
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Re: The numbering makes sense now...

Old urban myth and FUD, please do some reading.

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Microsoft WINDOWS 10: Seven ATE Nine. Or Eight did really

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Jeez, you'd think they've just dropped the bomb!

I do love the Reg commentards! "No way MS is coming near me!" Well what runs the tills in supermarkets? What runs most ATMs? What runs the controllers on quite a few SAN systems from well known manufacturers? Sure they're Not life critical I agree and I'm not a massive MS fan, and yes Windows is not bad but not great, but I do love seeing the fox in the "El Reg" coop, always guaranteed to shake things up for a laugh!

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Anti-Facebook Ello: Here's why we're still in beta. SPAMGASM!

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

FriendFace! FriendFace! FriendFace!

Did no one learn from Google+?

1. Once people have entrenched themselves in a set up with all their mates, the whole party has to move else no one will.

Or...

2. Wait for the next "generation" to decide against established social network and pick a new one.

Or...

3. You couldn't careless about any of this social networking bollocks and simply want a bloody good laugh at all the muppets and their so called online "friends"!

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Apple finally patches Bash Shellshock vuln that WAS NOT A WORRY, OK?

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Is this really relevant for OS X?

Ah so just 'cos very few people will use it, we don't need to worry too much about it? OK.

Hmmm, I do anticipate a lot of tears before bedtime if we all followed that sort of thinking.

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What's a Chromebook good for? How about running PHOTOSHOP?

Amorous Cowherder
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Nice idea and quite interesting...

...certainly a nice little toy as a proof of concept but with today's technology and speeds, not feasible for most serious uses. Average RAW is around 30MB, average PSD after edits for me is minimum of 750MB.

Sadly for this to be really usable we're going to need extremely fast links to maintain extremely high quality of the screen display. As camera tech improves will see RAW and PSD files increase in size over the next X number of years and so the link speeds required to make this useful will need to really get into gear.

I use Adobe CC with no issues and I'm happy with the price and service but this is a new ballgame, the on-demand app type tech is very much just a nice POC at the moment. Interesting stuff.

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TEEN RAMPAGE: Kids in iPhone 6 'Will it bend' YouTube 'prank'

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

FFS, what a pair planks!

Is this moronic activity any better than walking into a jewellers and using a hammer to smash to the cases and walk out? Hope the Police catch the pair of tossers and get 'em out on community service doing something useful with themselves.

I hold no truck with Apple products but this just mindless damage to someone else's stuff, no artistic or newsworthy merit at all.

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George Clooney, WikiLeaks' lawyer wife hand out burner phones to wedding guests

Amorous Cowherder
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Security? Codswallop!

"because the couple are said to have sold the rights to the wedding photographs to a magazine"

That's all this stuff ever is! Granted in this case there was some charity donation thing too but most of the time it's all about recouping the cost of your $750,000 wedding event through sales of the images. Celeb weddings aren't weddings like we plebs have, they're more like the political weddings of the middle ages royalty, all about prestige.

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WHY did Sunday Mirror stoop to slurping selfies for smut sting?

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Re: the Mirror couldn't even take its own selfie

Most papers are lazy these days, that's the reason they've sacked their qualified staff photographers and simply rely on ciziten supplied photos from mobiles. When they need a shot, they buy a stock shot from a knock-down cheap library or more likely they steal off someone's website or FB profile. The amount a story will generate in paper sales compared to a couple of grand to pay off the poor sod who's had their online identity wrecked is nothing to the gutter press scum.

When Spitting Image showed the press journos as pigs in dirty macs, they really nailed it.

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Ordnance Survey intern plonks houses, trees, rivers and roads on GB Minecraft map

Amorous Cowherder
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The only area that does benefit from a play guide is complex redstone devices, some of the Heath-Robinson type contraptions you can build using that stuff are quite stunning.

As to the rest of the game, one of it's joys is learning how the environment functions. Some fun to be had in building your own "nasties" safari park complete with rides through the areas to stare at the attractions!

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BLAM, BLAM, BLAM... nooooo! Hacker crew Lizard Squad spits DDoS venom on Call of Duty

Amorous Cowherder
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They're kids, who said they'd thought of any consequences?! Ha! "Youth is wasted on the young." and all that!

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Bono: Apple will sort out monetising music where the labels failed

Amorous Cowherder
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Stop

Just do what the sign says over there Mr Bono.

Unless this new thing is a product that's shipped in a full size 12" gatefold then there's nothing digital you could ever do that would recreate the magical moments I spent as a kid listening to my first self purchased LPs and staring at the amazing art work on those sleeves. The work of Derek Riggs ( Iron Maiden ), Roger Dean ( Yes and Budgie ), Ed Repka ( Megadeth ) and many many more that I still cherish but sadly now mothballed in my spare room.

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Man buys iPHONE 6 and DROPS IT to SMASH on PURPOSE

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

What a fecking twat!

Resources we use and abuse on this planet are not infinite this twat needs to realise that. No wonder there's so many divs around who upgrade at release time and have very little care for what happens every time they dump their last toy in an "electronic gadget bin". Do they think little pink pixies recycle old gadgets?! They get shipped off to some Asian backwater where some poor sods strip out the precious metals and components, usually by hand, breathing in toxic fumes and risking their lives for a few quid a day. Sorry but a gadget should be used right up until you can no longer sensibly justify it's use or it's broken beyond repair by sheer use, not busted in public 5 secs after buying it because some utter twat wants to score YouTube hits. And no, It's not about the money, simply saying "His money, his choice." doesn't come into it, he's obviously no respect for the resources it cost to make it and ship it just so he could be a arse in public.

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First day of Hurd'n'Catz at Oracle: It's dis-fur-pointing for Wall St

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Re: I wonder if...

I wouldn't worry about that, there's a never ending supply of dopey middle managers who know sweet FA about "best of breed" and can only equate tech with Microsoft on the desktop, Oracle or Microsoft in the server room and Apple in the hand!

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Why Oracle CEO Larry Ellison had to go ... Except he hasn't

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: CTO?

Same here and that's more or less how the biography shows him to be, he's a smart guy but he's more tech manager smart not shop-floor tech smart. When he founded the SDL it was Miner and Oates putting in all hours to make the Oracle v1 meanwhile Ellison is taking money from petty cash to wine and dine clients. I admire his drive and ambition but when you read his story he really is the world's biggest dickhead but I suspect he himself would happily admit that and add, with his customary arrogance, that he's also one of the world's richest!

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Driving with an Apple Watch could land you with a £100 FINE

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Speedo?

Use voice control? I've only got a bog standard Honda CRV and it has full voice control for almost every system in the car, including heating, sat nav, music/radio, phone calls. Push one button on the steering wheel and then tell it what you want, "heater up one degree", "radio preset two", "satnav destination home" or "phone book dial home" to get the handfree to use my mobile. Alright you look a bit mental to passers by while sitting at the lights shouting at no one inside your car but at least you never have to take your eye off the road other than for the speedo. You can use cruise control to lock the speed on long roads.

My kids have a great time yelling rude or stupid words at the cars voice control to see how badly it interprets their squeeky tones!

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JINGS! Microsoft Bing called Scots indyref RIGHT!

Amorous Cowherder
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Scotland would probably ally with France, they have many, many times before. The "auld alliance" I believe it's called?

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Hate Facebook? Hate it enough to spend $9k fleeing it? Web 'country club' built for the rich

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Fools and their money.

Hmmm, an online forum full of braying twats bragging about the latest petrol driven penis substitution they've just plonked in the one of their many garages, sounds like a barrel of laughs!

Facebook might be shit but at least I haven't forked out $9k for the privilege to read shite by a load of twats I probably wouldn't be seen dead with in public, on FB I can get it for free.

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First Irish boy band U2. Now Apple pushes ANOTHER thing into iPhones, iPods, iPads

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Nothing generates as many downvotes on posts as a good Andy vs Apple story!

x

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'Windows 9' LEAK: Microsoft's playing catchup with Linux

Amorous Cowherder
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OSX has it, Linux has it, heck didn't the Amiga Workbench have a hack like this once? About time Windows caught up.

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Chinese city creates footpath for smartphone addicts

Amorous Cowherder
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Boffin

Alright it's a stupid example but does point a very clear lesson that the Asian countries take technology and its use very seriously, that's just one of the reasons their economy's are growing at a rapid rate compared to ours in the west. We need to be just as daft as them in trying to find innovative ways to harness technology for everyone's benefit. It's a funny joke but with a serious message underneath!

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Microsoft's rumoured $2.5bn Minecraft gobble expected on Monday

Amorous Cowherder
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Seems daft to buy a product that's pretty much as bedded in as this is, it's pretty much run it's course and those who are into it now are pretty much the only ones who are, it's not going to get a huge upsurge in users at this late stage. I'm genuinely curious to know what opportunities MS sees in this, other than turning it into a pay-2-play game for existing users, "The base is still free but our new super add-ons will cost you!".

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What kind of mugs do you take us for? Malicious sites in spam scams target UK

Amorous Cowherder
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Have you seen any of these? "You have a a UPS/Fedex parcel for pickup! Click here!", "You are summoned to appear in court in Bumblefuck, USA. Click here for the PDF.". "You have air tickets from American Airlines, click here."

Honestly, they're hardly believable are they?!

#1 Have you ordered anything? Check with supplier's website directly.

#2 Have you ever set foot in the USA, let alone made it to Bumblefuck?

#3 Have you ordered tickets for anything remotely transport like?

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James Bond's metal-toothed nemesis Richard Kiel dies at 74

Amorous Cowherder
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A sad day

Didn't he do a Shreaded Wheat ad once?

No one remembers actors who play the good guys be we always remember a villain!

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Found inside ISIS terror chap's laptop: CELINE DION tunes

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

"...and advice on how to avoid the attention of the authorities."

Like not leaving your laptop, full of cack, in a bloody obvious place where they'll find it?

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Google extends app refund window to two hours

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

That 15 mins was always a bugger, some games are well over 400MB, so on a portable wifi connection it can take 10 mins to get the game, 30 seconds to start, 60 seconds to get through the company logo animations and 2 mins to watch the intro trailers not a lot of time left to decide!

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