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* Posts by Amorous Cowherder

575 posts • joined 5 Jul 2012

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Microsoft reveals NEW Windows 10. WAIT, 10? Yes, 'cos Seven ate Nine

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Jeez, you'd think they've just dropped the bomb!

I do love the Reg commentards! "No way MS is coming near me!" Well what runs the tills in supermarkets? What runs most ATMs? What runs the controllers on quite a few SAN systems from well known manufacturers? Sure they're Not life critical I agree and I'm not a massive MS fan, and yes Windows is not bad but not great, but I do love seeing the fox in the "El Reg" coop, always guaranteed to shake things up for a laugh!

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Anti-Facebook Ello: Here's why we're still in beta. SPAMGASM!

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

FriendFace! FriendFace! FriendFace!

Did no one learn from Google+?

1. Once people have entrenched themselves in a set up with all their mates, the whole party has to move else no one will.

Or...

2. Wait for the next "generation" to decide against established social network and pick a new one.

Or...

3. You couldn't careless about any of this social networking bollocks and simply want a bloody good laugh at all the muppets and their so called online "friends"!

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Apple finally patches Bash Shellshock vuln that WAS NOT A WORRY, OK?

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Is this really relevant for OS X?

Ah so just 'cos very few people will use it, we don't need to worry too much about it? OK.

Hmmm, I do anticipate a lot of tears before bedtime if we all followed that sort of thinking.

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What's a Chromebook good for? How about running PHOTOSHOP?

Amorous Cowherder
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Nice idea and quite interesting...

...certainly a nice little toy as a proof of concept but with today's technology and speeds, not feasible for most serious uses. Average RAW is around 30MB, average PSD after edits for me is minimum of 750MB.

Sadly for this to be really usable we're going to need extremely fast links to maintain extremely high quality of the screen display. As camera tech improves will see RAW and PSD files increase in size over the next X number of years and so the link speeds required to make this useful will need to really get into gear.

I use Adobe CC with no issues and I'm happy with the price and service but this is a new ballgame, the on-demand app type tech is very much just a nice POC at the moment. Interesting stuff.

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TEEN RAMPAGE: Kids in iPhone 6 'Will it bend' YouTube 'prank'

Amorous Cowherder
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FFS, what a pair planks!

Is this moronic activity any better than walking into a jewellers and using a hammer to smash to the cases and walk out? Hope the Police catch the pair of tossers and get 'em out on community service doing something useful with themselves.

I hold no truck with Apple products but this just mindless damage to someone else's stuff, no artistic or newsworthy merit at all.

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George Clooney, WikiLeaks' lawyer wife hand out burner phones to wedding guests

Amorous Cowherder
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Security? Codswallop!

"because the couple are said to have sold the rights to the wedding photographs to a magazine"

That's all this stuff ever is! Granted in this case there was some charity donation thing too but most of the time it's all about recouping the cost of your $750,000 wedding event through sales of the images. Celeb weddings aren't weddings like we plebs have, they're more like the political weddings of the middle ages royalty, all about prestige.

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WHY did Sunday Mirror stoop to slurping selfies for smut sting?

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: the Mirror couldn't even take its own selfie

Most papers are lazy these days, that's the reason they've sacked their qualified staff photographers and simply rely on ciziten supplied photos from mobiles. When they need a shot, they buy a stock shot from a knock-down cheap library or more likely they steal off someone's website or FB profile. The amount a story will generate in paper sales compared to a couple of grand to pay off the poor sod who's had their online identity wrecked is nothing to the gutter press scum.

When Spitting Image showed the press journos as pigs in dirty macs, they really nailed it.

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Ordnance Survey intern plonks houses, trees, rivers and roads on GB Minecraft map

Amorous Cowherder
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The only area that does benefit from a play guide is complex redstone devices, some of the Heath-Robinson type contraptions you can build using that stuff are quite stunning.

As to the rest of the game, one of it's joys is learning how the environment functions. Some fun to be had in building your own "nasties" safari park complete with rides through the areas to stare at the attractions!

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BLAM, BLAM, BLAM... nooooo! Hacker crew Lizard Squad spits DDoS venom on Call of Duty

Amorous Cowherder
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They're kids, who said they'd thought of any consequences?! Ha! "Youth is wasted on the young." and all that!

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Bono: Apple will sort out monetising music where the labels failed

Amorous Cowherder
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Stop

Just do what the sign says over there Mr Bono.

Unless this new thing is a product that's shipped in a full size 12" gatefold then there's nothing digital you could ever do that would recreate the magical moments I spent as a kid listening to my first self purchased LPs and staring at the amazing art work on those sleeves. The work of Derek Riggs ( Iron Maiden ), Roger Dean ( Yes and Budgie ), Ed Repka ( Megadeth ) and many many more that I still cherish but sadly now mothballed in my spare room.

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Man buys iPHONE 6 and DROPS IT to SMASH on PURPOSE

Amorous Cowherder
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What a fecking twat!

Resources we use and abuse on this planet are not infinite this twat needs to realise that. No wonder there's so many divs around who upgrade at release time and have very little care for what happens every time they dump their last toy in an "electronic gadget bin". Do they think little pink pixies recycle old gadgets?! They get shipped off to some Asian backwater where some poor sods strip out the precious metals and components, usually by hand, breathing in toxic fumes and risking their lives for a few quid a day. Sorry but a gadget should be used right up until you can no longer sensibly justify it's use or it's broken beyond repair by sheer use, not busted in public 5 secs after buying it because some utter twat wants to score YouTube hits. And no, It's not about the money, simply saying "His money, his choice." doesn't come into it, he's obviously no respect for the resources it cost to make it and ship it just so he could be a arse in public.

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First day of Hurd'n'Catz at Oracle: It's dis-fur-pointing for Wall St

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: I wonder if...

I wouldn't worry about that, there's a never ending supply of dopey middle managers who know sweet FA about "best of breed" and can only equate tech with Microsoft on the desktop, Oracle or Microsoft in the server room and Apple in the hand!

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Why Oracle CEO Larry Ellison had to go ... Except he hasn't

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: CTO?

Same here and that's more or less how the biography shows him to be, he's a smart guy but he's more tech manager smart not shop-floor tech smart. When he founded the SDL it was Miner and Oates putting in all hours to make the Oracle v1 meanwhile Ellison is taking money from petty cash to wine and dine clients. I admire his drive and ambition but when you read his story he really is the world's biggest dickhead but I suspect he himself would happily admit that and add, with his customary arrogance, that he's also one of the world's richest!

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Driving with an Apple Watch could land you with a £100 FINE

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Speedo?

Use voice control? I've only got a bog standard Honda CRV and it has full voice control for almost every system in the car, including heating, sat nav, music/radio, phone calls. Push one button on the steering wheel and then tell it what you want, "heater up one degree", "radio preset two", "satnav destination home" or "phone book dial home" to get the handfree to use my mobile. Alright you look a bit mental to passers by while sitting at the lights shouting at no one inside your car but at least you never have to take your eye off the road other than for the speedo. You can use cruise control to lock the speed on long roads.

My kids have a great time yelling rude or stupid words at the cars voice control to see how badly it interprets their squeeky tones!

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JINGS! Microsoft Bing called Scots indyref RIGHT!

Amorous Cowherder
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Scotland would probably ally with France, they have many, many times before. The "auld alliance" I believe it's called?

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Hate Facebook? Hate it enough to spend $9k fleeing it? Web 'country club' built for the rich

Amorous Cowherder
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Fools and their money.

Hmmm, an online forum full of braying twats bragging about the latest petrol driven penis substitution they've just plonked in the one of their many garages, sounds like a barrel of laughs!

Facebook might be shit but at least I haven't forked out $9k for the privilege to read shite by a load of twats I probably wouldn't be seen dead with in public, on FB I can get it for free.

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First Irish boy band U2. Now Apple pushes ANOTHER thing into iPhones, iPods, iPads

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

Nothing generates as many downvotes on posts as a good Andy vs Apple story!

x

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'Windows 9' LEAK: Microsoft's playing catchup with Linux

Amorous Cowherder
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OSX has it, Linux has it, heck didn't the Amiga Workbench have a hack like this once? About time Windows caught up.

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Chinese city creates footpath for smartphone addicts

Amorous Cowherder
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Boffin

Alright it's a stupid example but does point a very clear lesson that the Asian countries take technology and its use very seriously, that's just one of the reasons their economy's are growing at a rapid rate compared to ours in the west. We need to be just as daft as them in trying to find innovative ways to harness technology for everyone's benefit. It's a funny joke but with a serious message underneath!

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Microsoft's rumoured $2.5bn Minecraft gobble expected on Monday

Amorous Cowherder
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Seems daft to buy a product that's pretty much as bedded in as this is, it's pretty much run it's course and those who are into it now are pretty much the only ones who are, it's not going to get a huge upsurge in users at this late stage. I'm genuinely curious to know what opportunities MS sees in this, other than turning it into a pay-2-play game for existing users, "The base is still free but our new super add-ons will cost you!".

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What kind of mugs do you take us for? Malicious sites in spam scams target UK

Amorous Cowherder
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Have you seen any of these? "You have a a UPS/Fedex parcel for pickup! Click here!", "You are summoned to appear in court in Bumblefuck, USA. Click here for the PDF.". "You have air tickets from American Airlines, click here."

Honestly, they're hardly believable are they?!

#1 Have you ordered anything? Check with supplier's website directly.

#2 Have you ever set foot in the USA, let alone made it to Bumblefuck?

#3 Have you ordered tickets for anything remotely transport like?

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James Bond's metal-toothed nemesis Richard Kiel dies at 74

Amorous Cowherder
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A sad day

Didn't he do a Shreaded Wheat ad once?

No one remembers actors who play the good guys be we always remember a villain!

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Found inside ISIS terror chap's laptop: CELINE DION tunes

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

"...and advice on how to avoid the attention of the authorities."

Like not leaving your laptop, full of cack, in a bloody obvious place where they'll find it?

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Google extends app refund window to two hours

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

That 15 mins was always a bugger, some games are well over 400MB, so on a portable wifi connection it can take 10 mins to get the game, 30 seconds to start, 60 seconds to get through the company logo animations and 2 mins to watch the intro trailers not a lot of time left to decide!

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This flashlight app requires: Your contacts list, identity, access to your camera...

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

I think one the biggest problems is laziness. These crappy little apps are often written by people who've spent about 2 weeks learning Java, then decided to have a crack at Android development, managed to knock up some naff little app in an afternoon and in order to make it as easy as possible to get access to the class defs they need, they simply enable everything possible. It's much like some DB developers simply ask for DBA level account privs as it makes it easier than having to code within the confines of a security system. Consequently when the naff little Android app heads to the store it flags up that it needs X + Y + Z just to enable the flashlight on the camera!

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What the BLOCK? Microsoft to gobble Minecraft-maker 'for $2bn'

Amorous Cowherder
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So what

There's so many derivitives of MC on the portable platforms now that losing MC to MS will be no great hardship, I fully expect that there's already plenty of open source alternatives to MC on various platforms.

Same old tale, a great success story but the big boys only move in late. They realise they've bought a duff one but they push on. They mess with it trying to get their money back but because it's been cloned and copied, usually bettered, they fail and then they "bargain basement" the product back to the original maker!

I'd almost put money down on MS buying it for stupid money and selling it back to Notch for a $150m in 3 years time!

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BONEHEAD FANBOIS encamp outside Apple Stores

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Jog on, pal!

You'd really waste that much time and effort on these people? Let evolution take it's course when a load of pissed up revellers walk past this coming Friday night!

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Cave scrawls prove Neanderthals were AT LEAST as talented as modern artists

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Crude scrawl?

Why did I hear Kate Robbins voice reading the part of Ug in breakfast's post?!! Time of the pub methinks!

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Don't bother with Apple's 9 Sept hype-day: Someone's GONE AND BLABBED IT ALL

Amorous Cowherder
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New one-handed mode?!

Really? One huge elephant-in-the-room joke just waiting to be spotted there!

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Amorous Cowherder
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Thumb Up

Re: Biting on the Apple

"Can anyone with a 3 year old Android phone say the same?"

Yep, still using my Galaxy S2, now heading for it's 3rd birthday next month. Had a screen protector on it from day 1 ( which I changed after only last night actually ), the screen is immaculate underneath. The rubber case means there's not a single scratch on it anywhere. With grateful thanks to the the wonderful hacking community, I've bounced Android up to a 4.4.2 2 months ago and it still works like a charm and still plays the latest games!

So I'm sorry to say, unless something stupid happens to it, no phone manufacturers will be getting any custom off me in the near future.

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You are here => Earth is in 'the suburbs' of an IMMENSE HEAVEN

Amorous Cowherder
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Unhappy

Re: Too bad there is no such thing as a total perspective vortex

Sadly that's what makes it all the remarkable. Huge, mind-f**king amount of exciting stuff out there to find and look at, yet the idiots jacking-off over their bits of metal that make bang-bang noises just seem intent in trying to keep the human race a smidge below the mental capacity of pond scum.

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Don't buy that phone! It ATTRACTS CRIMINALS, UK.gov will tell people

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

How about spending taxes on educating morons on being careful rather than giving ministers and lackeys the fun of pouring over useless insurance stats and playing with valuable handsets?

The number of idiots with bags wide open ( especially you ladies on the tube! ) showing all their tech goodies and wallets/purses, people staring blankly into space while holding their latest iPhone with just two fingers and the idiots who leave their phones on tables in public places while they lean over to another table to get something. Put it in your pocket! If you need to wait for a call, crank up the volume or vibrate for the next hour or two. Some ringtones are loud and obnoxious enough to wake the dead, you don't need to be fondling your phone 24 hours a day on the off chance of a call.

No not everyone is a scumbag, but it's better to be safe than sorry.

( Don't get me started on the idiots to take their cash from ATMs and just wander away waving it about for 30 seconds before putting it in their pocket! )

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CNN 'tech analyst' on NAKED CELEBS: WHO IS this mystery '4chan' PERSON?

Amorous Cowherder
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Facepalm

So Brett's will now be "a$$hole" ???

Tch!

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Good luck with Project Wing, Google. This drone moonshot is NEVER going to happen

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Why?

The US Gov ( and others worldwide ) doesn't want shit loads of these things buzzing about up there, so Google realises this and wants to get in there first. They can then provide a delivery service to others for a huge fee. If Amazon, UPS, Fedex, et al can't get their own licenses, Google are on to a nice little earner and imagine Google getting their grubby mitts on all that logistics data? Goldmine!!

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It's official: Brit parents want their kids to be just like Steve Bong

Amorous Cowherder
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WTF?

Who the heck is Steve Bong? I never heard of him before!

I assume this is someone famous from TV? I've no time for broadcast TV these days, especially if the stars are called Bong!

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Twitter: La la la, we haven't heard of NUDE JLaw, Upton SELFIES

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Polaroids FTW

"No doubt some idiot will suggest they shouldn't take nude pictures of themselves. Why the hell shouldn't they?"

That's not the issue as such. The point is, don't take nude pictures of yourself IF you don't ever want anyone to see them. No problem with the pics but I, and I suspect most sensible people, have a problem with the stupid attitudes when these pics end up leaked.

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Amorous Cowherder
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Happy

Re: @David Webb

@janimal - I do often and the love of my life starts wondering which latest techno-toy I've just wasted large sums of the shared back account on! Ha ha!

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BBC: We're going to slip CODING into kids' TV

Amorous Cowherder
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Happy

Oh for the late Iain McNaught Davis, he'd have us all programming again in a jiffy!

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iCloud fiasco: 100 FAMOUS WOMEN exposed NUDE online

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Yes.

"you fucking well have plenty to fear now!"

Well no, not really. I'm not a complete twat who'd even contemplate posting anything as moronic as a naked picture of myself in a public place!

IT lesson #132 for Normal People - Internet = Public Town Square. If you won't do it down the local town square, then don't do it on the internet!

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Google hops into bed with Brit red-top: Cooks up 'draw an app' coding compo for kids

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: I'm just amazed...

I love our gutter press, front page screams "STRING UP THE SICK PEADO SCUM!", little advert in the corner of the page, "Phwoar lads! Get an eyeful sweet 16 Debs posing topless!".

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Sir, sir, my cloud ate my homework: Google touts grading tool to teachers

Amorous Cowherder
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Boffin

Oooh, a step too far Google. I don't mind if I willing submit my info to you but when my kids have no choice because the UK gov says it's alright for Google to spy on my kids abilities through their homework? Ooh, to much.

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Stanford boffin is first woman to bag 'math Nobel Prize'

Amorous Cowherder
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She a genius 'cos she's a genius

Why should her gender matter? She obviously got the "gig" because she's the best of the best at what she does. Can't we just appreciate someone achieving something because they worked damn hard for it without bringing their gender or any other non-related matters into it?

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Cracker takes control of 200 rooms in Chinese hotel

Amorous Cowherder
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Happy

The lesson to be learned here...

Don't let techies get bored in hotel rooms 'cos we'll seriously bugger up your, ermm, blinds!

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Google's 'right to be forgotten': One rule for celebs, another for plebs

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: Slebometer

Exactly! Define being famous. Several hundred people follow me and my photographic exploits, tiny in comparison to some z-list pop starlet but am I famous 'cos a few hundred people follow my work? I'm well known and respected within some small groups of people but outside that no bugger will have heard of me! Do I get special dispensation from Google?

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African samba queen: Don't cut off pirates' net connections – cut off their FINGERS

Amorous Cowherder
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Flame

To quote Not the Nine O'Clock News, "CUT THE BALLS OFF! It's the only way! CUT THEM OFF! CUT THEM RIGHT OFF!"

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Pentagon hacker McKinnon reinvents himself as SEO guru

Amorous Cowherder
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Happy

" US authorities claimed his actions had caused $800K in damages, describing his actions as the "biggest military computer hack of all time". "

You reckon they make a Top Trumps Hackers set? My Snowdon card beats your McKinnon card!

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SOULLESS machine-intelligence ROBOT cars to hit Blighty in 2015

Amorous Cowherder
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Science minister Greg Clark added: “Britain is brilliantly placed to lead the world in driverless technology. It combines our strengths in cars, satellites, big data and urban design; with huge potential benefits for future jobs and for the consumer.”

-- Yep, we have lots of CCTV to keep track of the cars and spot those trying to nick or destroy them!

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Facebook: Want to stay in touch? Then it's Messenger or NOTHING

Amorous Cowherder
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Re: The less they care

Well yes, as they get bigger they need more money to run the service "for free". That only comes by way of "the man" sorting out their finances and making sure that every possible opportunity is taken to maximise income, if that means pissing off a few users then so be it, that's business.

Facebook was one of the first to get social networking right, grew at a stellar rate pulled in everyone and their dog and as Google+ found out separating people from their circle of online mates is a nigh on impossible task. Creatures of habit, most of the time we simply shut-up and put up with things that are relatively small parts of our daily lives. The average FB user ( just a few mates and family ) wouldn't dream of trying to waste any time on trying to move to another network, it's not worth the effort. Zuck knows this, which means up to a certain point he can do what the hell he likes with his baby, everyone moans but ultimately puts up with it.

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The END of the FONDLESLAB KINGS? Apple and Samsung have reason to FEAR

Amorous Cowherder
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Had an ASUS TF-101 for the last two and half years and I'm happy with it. Recently rooted it and put KitKat on it, battery life is better than ever and it seems a tad more responsive. It works perfectly for everything I need but when it does finally die I'll be more than happy to buy another ASUS tablet based on my good experiences with this one.

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eBay impulse buyers STAY AWAY: Holy Grail Superman comic book to fetch $2m+

Amorous Cowherder
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Charity donation aside, I bet Fleabay can't wait to get their claws into that lovely 10% commission on the sale of a $2m item!

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