192 posts • joined 30 Mar 2012
Processed meat is that which can flow out of a faucet
How do I get Northumbrian Water to pipe bacon into my house?
Why does the secretarial pool, or accounts need a bunch of i7's?
Operating system bloat.
Given that 2 survived I'd say the hospital was negligent too.
Biggest problem with financial statements?
It's that most of them were put together by numberblind monkeys.
This is the reason the big 4 have departments that specialise in correcting the accounts before they get signed.
If they do manage to add up? They can't spell (nor can I after half a brick of cider... ) a certain large former building society used to spell mortgage without a t....
For those who have never had the joy of reading a glossy annual report here is a brief run down...
<cynic> Chairmans statement: utter fiction about how good the company is.
Financial review - repeats the back half in words of one syllable for the analysts
Directors report- doesnt tell you anything you need to know - but keeps companies house happy.
Strategic report - This in theory gives you an idea of how the company is doing, however it usually contradicts itself.
The financial statements - tells you how the company did and how likely it will still be in business next year. Pity the numbers wont agree between the notes and the primary statements.
Re: It was a triumph....
It was a triumph....
Anyone else notice that they used orange and blue for the opposite sides of the porta.... I mean message?
@ Sarah Balfour
Cold Turkey with a change of routine.
Go on holiday without the gum.
Disclaimer - this worked for me 8 years ago - went from 20-40 a day (depending on whether I was drinking that day) to nil. Stopped the cigs the day before we flew, the first day was tough, second day, stuck in a no smoking airport, not so bad.
Not having any of the usual day time triggers for a smoke helped a lot.
Now - kill it with fire - I mean really kill it.
1Kg of termite in a couple of plant pots.
that would be probably the worst case without access to fissionables.
Re: Racetrack Playa
That's what she said
Wonder if i could cash in... I mean get similar video views with putting a bodkin tipped arrow through a phone.......
Re: Guy that owns most of Soho
Thought it would have been Gerald Grosvenor,
live and learn
Re: Next gen WiFi???
I prefer the name "MacinToy"
The mind boggles at the images.
Would surprise me if each line started:
Re:looks a bit sci-fi WAS:To be fair
I thought Blake's 7 teleport bracelet. just needs a big pink rubber oblong.
I remember watches
Pretty much stopped wearing a watch with the advent of the mobile phone - after all even the most basic 90's phone had a clock on the display. Failing that there was always the windows clock or even, dare i say it echo %time%.
One benefit is the hair on my wrist regrew.
It does bring a swelling of pride doesn't it?
Well, the swelling of something anyway.
Trebles all round!
Re: Did you check the system clocks on the computers etc?
If the motherboard battery goes out I'd be surprised if it would boot up without having to fumble with the BIOS settings.
Re: They'll Get Away With It
Geo Amey or Group4 - at least until they get caught too.
Re: RE: Did any of you lot actually read the article
There 's nothing I would describe as human in Cornwall.
Re: Off the shelf suits?
But prison orange really does not suit you.
Not quite - from a devs viewpoint - "Which one are you going to write for?" 80% of the market or something smaller?
Nothing against apple, I have an aging ipod touch that's still in use, but I far prefer my Samsung 'droid.
At last, real scientific method!
"Its discovery implies that we need to seriously consider alternative formation theories, or perhaps to reassess some of the basic assumptions in the core-accretion theory."
Climate scientists take note, this is how you do science!
Re: Get rid of images of people
Turing? ok but I would prefer Eddington first. Another with alternative lifestyle choices.
I believe the rules are similar to stamps - nobody who is alive except for Her Maj.
Though I would say that Maggie is not a good choice for a maybe another 50 years - by the same token bLiar and Broon should never be depicted.
Famous women? Nightingale and Fry have been done....
Guess they'll have to compete on security or quality....
Re: Anna Chapman
If I had to give her a mark..
well I'd give her one.
It's hard to find a decent 5 button mouse that isn't right hand specific (or costs a fortune from Razer).
For years I used a Microsoft Intellimouse Explorer 5 button jobbie till the cable started to short out through wear, and I was most dischuffed to find they had been discontinued a while ago.
At 12 years of use that mouse was the longest serving piece of kit I've had, it's now been replaced with a £1.99 shenzen special from ebay- the only requirements were non-right handed shape and 5 buttons.
The usual suspects appear to be on holiday
Anyone else notice that most of El Reg's resident watermelons have not had anything to say on this?
Well I hope you all feel better when the apoplectic rage at the thought that green taxes might actually have to follow "real" climate change rather than the usual chicken little demands of the terminally stupid, I mean fanatically green.
That is if they haven't all had cardiac episodes on reading the article....
I lost 1.5 stone ditching my gluten free prescription and replacing the carbs with meat and veg - lots of meat and lots of veg.
You pays your money and you takes your chances.
Only another 2 stone to go now.
"We can't currently repair damaged nerves in humans"
Seems like this may be a way to do it?
Really sharp knife, short length of nerve from a donor (or elsewhere in the body - like skin for a skin graft) and glue in (for want of a better description) a bypass round the damaged nerve.
IANAS(urgeon) but it seems like IF the body transplant can work, then a nerve repair SHOULD be a much simpler technique.
The Tyne and Wear Metro is getting smart cards
... and I am expecting a much greater screwups than this.
It is already 3 months overdue on roll out (from their own documentation received with my smart card), and I cannot get a straight answer out of them as to whether it will still be possible to buy the 4 weekly pass online, as I do now, or whether I will lose the 10% discount for online purchase.
I'd be more worried
If he was reading Machiavelli.
Re: I can't see it in the story...
Posting on facebork is not like venting to a few friends down the pub - unless you have locked down your profile tighter than the proverbial ducks arse. It's more like yelling your opinion from the national newspapers.
You dont bring your employer into disrepute in a public place if you want to keep your job!
It's not rocket science.
But as this is the public sector its a slapped wrist not a firing offence.
They list their employer and or job.
Their boss is a "friend".
They have a couple of hundred "friends" they have never met.
There is personally identifiable information in their profile.
They still don't understand they did anything wrong.
It is an offence to possess or control a dead badger
...any part of one, or anything derived from one.
Don't you just love statute law like this?
How the fuck do you control a dead badger?
So the dead badgers have to be destroyed, it would be far better if the carcasses were put to good use.
What does badger taste like? If it's fairly ropy why not use it in dogfood?
I for one would like a badger skin rug.
Special interest from the NSA for a while?
Could be useful for generating page hits, got advertising on your site?
Just because it's a defense contractor
Does not mean it has anything at all to do with something covered by the OSA.
More likely to do with financial shennanigans like the one a few months ago where a scandinavian defense contractor* dropped a British defense contractor** in it over alleged* payments to foreign government officials.....
I believe the original story was covered here too.
* They also make rather nice cars I hear.
** guess who!
*** alleged for my safety, though since I havent used any names I don't think it would fall under libel anyway.
Should be fun when the Missus goes through the detector then, her "piercings" are 11 screws and 2 plates holding the shrapnel of a bad TPF together.
Re: I really don't know how we can change it. It's rigged very heavily against us
We could vote UKIP ....
Then again something similar happened in 1930's Germany....
Re: I grew up with the constant shadow of the IRA - but it never led to this, it was life as usual.
Nope, it was policy. The IRA wanted it to be a war UK gov did not want it as a war as it would lend legitamacy to the IRA.
So it was a policy of ignore the terrorists and starve them of the extra publicity.
On your feet or on your knees?
This is further curtailment of freedoms in the name of alleged safety from terrorism.
I grew up with the constant shadow of the IRA - but it never led to this, it was life as usual.
I'd much rather die on my feet than live on my knees.
re Using NASA data I find a trend of 0.101 +- 0.121C/decade over the last 17 years
You do notice the margin for error is larger than the mean increase?
Re: It's funny how people believe scientists when they're creating very complex machines
Scientists don't "create" complex machines, engineers build complex machines.
That's the difference between science and engineering.
Now the difference between scientists and climate scientists?
Real scientists observe data, make a hypothesis, test with actual data and, if it agrees with the hypothesis create a theory based on actual observations. This theory can be disproved and then further refined.
By past example (observable data!) climate "scientists" create a hypothesis to suit current funding fashions, test with real data, then fudge the data when it does not meet their preconceived conclusion (hockey stick, yamal etc.) and, then when their methods and data a questioned start a witch hunt or subvert the peer review process (HADCRU emails).
Re: Why did they miss out on the best bit ?
Because even the most drug addled crack whores have some standards and would not take erm... "part" with lawyers.
Messrs Jackson and Livingston were a significant influence on my young life
So much so that I've spent the last 30 odd years gaming in one way or another.
Nostalgia has made me go out and buy a few, ok 12, fighting fantsy books and am in the process of introducing the concept to my 7 year old son, we are currently working our way through Warlock.
Thanks Steve, I might have been richer without you and Ian, but I certainly would not have had as much fun!
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