* Posts by Omgwtfbbqtime

381 posts • joined 30 Mar 2012

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Giant male member spontaneously ejaculates over Norway

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: insidious ejaculation

"plant a mental seed"?

Isn't that the Herpes virii that attach themselves to the CNS?

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Smart meters set to cost Blighty as much as replacing Trident

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Headmaster

"Change in accounting methodology"

Translation: we were fudging the figures before, now we are fudging them less.

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Who wants a classic ThinkPad with whizzy new hardware? Lenovo would just love to know

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Sounds ok....

Anything but that godawful keyboard on the X1 Carbon would be great.

Where's the home and end keys? why is there no touch feedback from the function keys?

Why does the right control key want to be the insert key?

Ugh I hate it and am stuck with it for the next 3 years at work.

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Vegan eats BeEf, gets hooked

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Hmm something that stops BeEf from looking at your system...

I think Iwould have called it BeEf curtains....

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Britain beats back Argies over Falklands online land grab

Omgwtfbbqtime
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The people living on the Falklands are called "Stills"

as in They're Still fucking Bennies.

or if you prefer :

They're still the fucking Falkland Islands you Argie twat.

Hmm I need coffee.

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Flushed with success: No bog standard Canadian goldfish these

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Pint

Re: And how many people realise goldfish can easily live to 20+ years if looked after?

Only those who realise that a goldfish needs a LOT of space - we have 2 in a 150L tank - filthy buggers - goldfish need water changed more often than most other aquarium dwellers.

And the damn things keep destroying the plants, even if we feed them regularly.

However they do keep the snail population down :D

Goldfish are dead when they are floating upside down at the top of the beer glass.

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Killer ChAraCter HOSES almost all versions of Reader, Windows

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Quote from Wikipedia:

I always thought adobe meant "half baked"

Thank you, I'll be here all week.

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Tim Worstall dances to victory over resources scaremongerers

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Pint

Wish I could have gone.

But it was London, and a school night.

Plus the buffet was probably 90% gluten :(

Here's to the RegLectures going on tour. (Cider ftw)

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FLICK my FLINT and SNIFF my TREE on the streets of Naples

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Street vendors ...

Ah, but the sausages are your genuine pig product.

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Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Welcome Back

Nappybags are a good way to dispose of the tissues and condoms, allowing snuggling/snoring without either of you staggering to the bathroom afterwards for cleanup.

First to go to the loo in the morning bins the bag.

So baby products are still handy without babies!

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Version 0.1 super-stars built the universe – and they lived all the way over there, boffins point

Omgwtfbbqtime
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There's not enough carbon in the universe for it to be a tarball.....

Mines the ones with a pocket universe.

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Microsoft picks up shotgun, walks 'Modern apps' behind the shed

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Modern Applications

You mean there is a calculator on win 8.1 that isnt accessed through Start>Run>Calc.exe?

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Bitcoin blackmail gang start hurling DDoSes at Scandinavia

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Yes but...

No I would state that cyber crims have far more morals than to stoop to using chuggers.

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Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Yes but...

You mean like charities do?

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Call girl gets six years for Googler's drug death

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Mushroom

Re: "WAY more cops get shot by criminals than the other way around."

1100 killed by police? Does that include those who chose Suicide by Cop?

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City of birth? Why password questions are a terrible idea

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Trollface

Re: You don'r?

I prefer 'necrotic'

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Hacker 3D prints device that can crack a combo lock in 30 seconds

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Trollface

It's not about the value - it's all about the weight

a 5Kg bike needs a 20Kg lock and chain.

a 15Kg bike needs a 10Kg lock and chain.

a 25Kg bike doesn't need a lock.

Simples

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Facebook echo chamber: Or, the British media and the election

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: @fruitoftheloon

"I would v much like to know what is behind the downvotes for my posts above "

Not me- I prefer to just argue.

Occasionally I'll even upvote a post I argue with just because it gave me something to argue with.

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Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: @Omwhateverthatis: I read somewhere...

THinking again about this...

I'd extend it to exclude those who are politicians and those who work as civil servants.

Or we could go full Heinlein - only those who have done "National Service" get to have the vote -AFTER they have completed their term of service.

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Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: @Omwhateverthatis: I read somewhere...

Funnily enough she didn't, she had to work albeit part time, but enough to pay NIC for 30 years. So she has contributed.

Has yours?

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Omgwtfbbqtime
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I read somewhere...

If all YOU have is 3 GCSEs then the immigrant with the degree is not stealing YOUR job.

Personally I'm glad the Conservatives won, I don't earn over £100k but SWMBO and myself (and junior for that matter) are better off now than we were in 2010 and I expect things to continue to improve.

This will get me the downvotes if nothing else will:

How about if you can only vote if you are either working/full time education or have sufficient NI contributions over your working life to entitle you to a full pension. If you're the ward of the state (i.e. on benefits) you don't get a say?

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Mondeo Man turns into mutant electrical beauty: Ford Mondeo Hybrid

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Not bad

Make an estate variant and I'll have one.

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Spooks BUSTED: 27,000 profiles reveal new intel ops, home addresses

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Facepalm

Seems to be a distinct lack of HumINT.

EOM

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Why don't you rent your electronic wireless doorlock, asks man selling doorlocks

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Holmes

Colour me cynical....

Are these the same smartlocks the DMCA injunction relates to?

Security bods gagged using DMCA on eve of wireless key vuln reveal

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Boffins turns landfill WinPhones into microscopes

Omgwtfbbqtime
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@Doctor Syntax

You are an Olympus sales rep and I claim my five pounds!

Yup... getting my coat.

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18-wheeler ROBOT JUGGERNAUT hits Nevada's highways. Cower, fleshies!

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Terminator

Forget Transformers

Maximum Overdrive!

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E-voting and the UK election: Pick a lizard, any lizard

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: 'none of the above'

Vote for RON!

Re

Open

Nominations.

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Tesla reveals Powerwall battery packs for homes, Powerpacks for cities

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Facepalm

Do you have an ISA or savings account?

10% over 7 years, really?

My ISA (share not cash) made 25% over the last 12 months.

Maybe you're doing the wrong calculations...

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Fukushima nuke plant owner told to upgrade from Windows XP

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Facepalm

"The fear, confusion and conflicting information ..."

And there you have it.

The number of people contaminated was miniscule and so was the contamination.

Yes it can't be ignored, the lesson to learn is that the designed operating parameters were not capable of taking a once in 1000 years (10,000 years?) event, putting the gennys on the roof would help, as would building a bigger storm wall.

The other lesson is that anyone fostering panic for ideological ends should be beaten to death with their own pamphlets.

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Omgwtfbbqtime
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Happy

Re: Downvoters...

Take it as compliment that you made someone spit their dummy out.

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The Walton kids are ABSURDLY wealthy – and you're benefitting

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Mushroom

"The police and the army are there for what, exactly,..."

Gratuitous Galactica quote - "There's a reason you separate military and the police. One fights the enemies of the state, the other serves and protects the people. When the military becomes both, then the enemies of the state tend to become the people. "

The army are not there to stop Chavs breaking in and taking your stuff, they are there to stop the Russians/Argentinians/French(traditionally)/Germans(also traditionally) from taking all of our stuff, as well as being "Diplomacy of last resort".

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WIN a RockBLOCK Mk2 Iridium sat comms unit

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Paris Hilton

SLUT

Satellite

Linkage

Upload

Telemetry.

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Stop climate change by drinking Coca-Cola says Oz government

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Facepalm

Here's an idea on about the same level of sanity

Why not trap the CO2 and react it with sea water to get sodium carbonate/sodium hydrogen carbonate and just release that pesky chlorine into the atmosphere, after all it's not a carbon dioxide....

(Yes I know i'ts not that simple, but I cannot be bothered to look up the latent heats or methods of separation, though electrolysis seems to ring a bell....)

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UK.gov: We want Britannia's mobe-enabled cars to rule the roads

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: "You're on road X, speed limit is 30mph, cruise control sets a limit of 30mph..."

Two words for you - Black ice.

You let the car do the thinking for the driver and there is a large number of drivers won't think.

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The coming of DAB+: Stereo eluded the radio star

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: DAB...

In theory I have a DAB radio in my C-Max, however it only worked for a month before deciding "computer say no" and it is just not important enough to take it in to spend the next six months getting fixed (based on various reports on fora - apparently the head unit needs replacing and the manufacturer only does exchanges, can take up to 14 weeks once the garage admit defeat and put in the request for a replacement head).

I do miss Planet Rock but a 16GB usb stick full of metal/industrial does the trick.

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Nuclear waste spill: How a pro-organic push sparked $240m blunder

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Why not organic kitty litter? @WonkoTheSane

"AC is correct. The caffeine from decaf is sold for many megabux to energy drink / cola manufacturers."

Also to BigPharma for their cold and flu products and Squaddie candy.... I mean ProPlus.

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Omgwtfbbqtime
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Coat

Re: Hmmm. I wonder if you can ski on lard

Probably, but you can't hold a candle to it.

I'll get my coat....

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BOFH: Mmm, gotta love me some fresh BYOD dog roll

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Meat from a named animal

Fido does not count!

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Internet Explorer LIVES ON, cackle sneaky Microsoft engineers

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Facepalm

Re: Windows, your reign is over ....

All very nice, but what the fuck does that have to do with the death of IE?

Maybe you posted this in the wrong thread.

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Sir Terry remembered: Dickens' fire, Tolkien's imagination, and the wit of Wodehouse

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Reading order - Soul Music

Definitely - Soul Music / Hogfather / Thief of Time make a good starter set.

Always Liked the Susan Death books.

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Faux ‪pro-IS Facebook‬ shot down within hours of launch

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Mushroom

A redirection might have been more fun

Miss Khalifa needs far more fans from the Jihadi.....

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Ad bidding network caught slinging ransomware

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Facepalm

Fuck em.

Use Lynx.

Then again, do you realise how hard it is to find good quality ASCII porn?

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In assault on American values, Lockheed BLASTS PICKUP with RAYGUN

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Coat

30Kw laser?

Vehicle mounted?

Not many vehicles can output that sort of power other than say, for instance, a nuclear powered aircarrier.

Nah no military application whatsoever......

Mines the one with the guide to Nuclear Wessels in its back pocket...

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Shove off, ugly folk, says site for people who love themselves

Omgwtfbbqtime
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@h4rm0ny

It used to be* a squaddie maxim:

Go Ugly Early.

not so much to find a nice personality, or a girl you would like, as one who would put out.

I met Miss Right (yes there is a Mrs omgwtfbbqtime) so I stopped looking for Miss Right Now.

*It probably still is, and always will be.

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UK spaceport, phase two: Now where do we PUT the bleeding thing?

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: North East

Yeppers,

Newcastle, has an airport, nothing of interest or importance between NCL and the coast (Blyth... as I said nothing of interest or importance).

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Didn't the Left once want the WORKERS to get all the dosh?

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Facepalm

Re: However

"...government property and 100% of the revenue from it would flow to the government"

So 100% would be pissed up the wall rather than 85%?

Lets leave things as they are, less government waste all round.

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Dungeons & Dragons relaunches with 'freemium' version 5.0

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Boffin

I have a near mint red and blue boxes D&D (basic and expert)

Offers please.

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Mégane Renaultsport 275 Trophy: Hands-on gizmo-packed motoring

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Alert

Re: Oh dear

Even search the register forums (fora?) for Renault and electrical is telling enough....

Yes I had one.

The Peugeot wasn't much better either!

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It's not easy being Green. But WHY insist we knit our own ties?

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Thumb Down

Re: Let me get this right:

"If I was not working otherwise, I was not earning. The value of the time is zero."

Bullshit.

If I am not working, I'm doing something I WANT to do, as opposed to NEED to do.

ergo my free time is far more valuable to me than the 9 to 5 grind.

I use public transport to get to work as I get a half hour to read (something I do for fun) that I wouldn't get on the 20 minute drive to work.

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Patch now: Design flaw in Windows security allows hackers to own corporate laptops, PCs

Omgwtfbbqtime
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Re: Server 2003

Both of them.

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