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* Posts by Semtex451

119 posts • joined 21 Mar 2012

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Samsung Galaxy S5 fingerprint scanner hacked in just 4 DAYS

Semtex451
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Re: Double up

I reckon that feature will probably be appear in a couple of years.

But can you imagine how frustrating the beta would be?

"Did I mistype or did it misread?"

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Ex-Tony Blair adviser is new top boss at UK spy-hive GCHQ

Semtex451
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"studied classics at Wadham"

Proof then, that one really does need a first rate education to get on in this world.

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Look out, bankers! It's Lily Cole and her (Brit taxpayer-funded) WISH-PRINTING ATM

Semtex451
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Oh bless

In the name of the FSM, cant you all stop picking on the poor lass. This is last years money we're griping about, its time for El Reg, and us all to move on.

The child is at least "trying" to do something "positive" and she found some dopey well meaning civil service types to smile upon her.

I cant wait for the TED talk- cough

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Half of Twitter's 'active users' are SILENT STALKERS

Semtex451
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I blame the BBC and others for encouraging Twitter adoption by referencing it in various shows at every opportunity. Might explain a portion of those non - contributing users.

It has never felt right to me, that they should advertise Twitter. But I suppose the Media-types just think "its like email isn't it?"

tut

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Not your father's spam: Trojan slingers attach badness to attachment WITHIN attachment

Semtex451
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Re: This recursion trick obviously works

Scary. I'll alert what I call, the mail room.

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Wookiee! CHEWIE'S BACK in Star Wars Ep VII – blab Hollywood 'sources'

Semtex451
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Is the guy responsible for Jar Jar going to Comicpalooza?

I guess it wouldn't be safe.

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'Graceful' solar flare erupts from surface of Sun – NASA vid

Semtex451
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1.8 buses from memory

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Semtex451
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Nice to see Angstroms get an airing now and again. I'd use them more often if I could get the circle to stay on the A long enough.

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Rumour: Next Apple iThing to feature 65-inch screen. Four-limb multitouch, anyone?

Semtex451
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"Maybe an iMirror to make all you ugly fanbois a little prettier"

I have a feeling that even 65 inches won't make me look any better.

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The IT Crowd tops BAFTA nominations with four nods

Semtex451
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There's Stickers?!?!?

Where's our bloom'n stickers?

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Nothing's as SCARY as an overly aggressive SOFTWARE PIMP

Semtex451
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Re: Upgrayedd

Idiocracy awaits its true

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Semtex451
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Thanks Dabbsy for venting that article so I don't have to.

I know "Something after the weekend" doesn't have the same ring to it but Mondays might be a better day to cheer us up.

So what's this Voice thing you won't be appearing in then?

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Titanfall pits man against machine, Kiefer Sutherland Snakes into Metal Gear Solid V

Semtex451
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"The solo campaign might provide action set pieces to demo at E3 and subsequently showcase on adverts, but if it was missing would anyone really care?"

I am old and set in my ways. I expect at least 8 hours of Single player action from a triple A title and only then the mutiplayer mayhem.

That's not to say I'd never buy a multiplayer only game.

But that's probably just me.

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'Bank couriers' who stole money from OAP cancer sufferer jailed

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'Good job, NSA! You turned Yahoo! into an encryption beast'

Semtex451
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What! Happened! To! The! Stupid! Yahoo! Headline! System!

I'm just asking.

Somehow without a single question mark...

?

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Tesla cars can now 'do an ET' without hurting anyone's bottom line

Semtex451
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Not ET but Rolls Royce Trent

Phone home? Is it ETs Birthday or something?

Its more like live telemetry no?

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Get ready for software-defined RADAR: Jam, eavesdrop, talk and target ... simultaneously

Semtex451
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K1 Applications Poster

Ubisofts G.R.A.W the example for man-wearables, nice and dramatic.

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LaCie adds fire to Fuel: Revs Wi-Fi external storage gadget to 2TB

Semtex451
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WTF?

Brave or Foolish?

El Reg?

Advertising this Tat?

To Reg Readers?

Whom all have "proper" NAS & Streaming set up years hence.

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HTC One M8: Reg man takes spin in Alfa Romeo of smartphone world

Semtex451
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The Phone with only One mate

Shouldn't they have called it the Gr8 M8?

One m8 just feels a bit melancholy.

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ECCENTRIC, PINK DWARF dubbed 'Biden' by saucy astronomers

Semtex451
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I note with interest and alarm that the 2D diagram pictured shows the orbits of Sedna and Biden intersecting at two points.

How long until they collide?

AAAAAARGH

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Forget sledgehammers – crooks can CRACK ATMs with a TEXT

Semtex451
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Joke

Inform the Met

Doesn't this make every El Reg Hack a Bandito too?

After all they get cash from text.

Sorry wheres that withdraw button?

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Apple vows to add racially diverse EMOJIS after MILEY CYRUS TWITTER outrage

Semtex451
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Pe-yeeew

I have an emoticon (I'm too old to say emoji) for a coiled turd with eyes and a friendly smile.

What I want to know is, why it never shows up when I send it to random Android users?

What their shit don't smell?

Mines the one with the sticky pockets.

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Improbable: YOU gave model Lily Cole £200k for her Impossible.com whimsy-site

Semtex451
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Waste of Taxpayers Money #142859345

To add to Dr Dre and others above:

How about the £30-40 Meeeeelion about to be handed to MS because the DoH can't recruit IT Managers who can migrate an to a new OS once in 10 years.

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Reg tries out Google's Chromecast: Yep, we even tested smut sites

Semtex451
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Ah a pattern is emerging. Up vote to compensate kind Sir.

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Semtex451
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Unhappy

Down-votes for Language use?

Or for being too lazy to unplug something else?

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Semtex451
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Me Piggin TV only has x3 HDMI :(

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5 Eyes in the Sky: The TRUTH about Flight MH370 and SPOOKSATS

Semtex451
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Joke

I'm sure I've seen pictures of buses and WWII planes ending up on the moon.

I'm just saying.

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They want me to install CCTV to see what YOU did in the TOILET

Semtex451
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Hang on a second

A blonde female came up and .....spoke to you?!?

and we're supposed to believe this all happened....in a Pub?

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Cops bang up squiffy, nude Virginian minx

Semtex451
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Re: Semtex451 limerick competition mission Creep

There was a young lass from Reston VA

Missing hubby banged up for more than a day

For a Paddy’s day bash

She went out on the lash

Appeared nude at the clink for a roll in the hay

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Semtex451
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Go

limerick competition mission Creep

Its asking too much i suppose to have a Limerick competition on this quality Bootnote, instead of ball point pens.

Tut.

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Reality check: Java 8 finally catches a multi-core break

Semtex451
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Hurrah!!

SE8u1 arrives next week?

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So. Farewell then Steelie Neelie: You were WORSE than USELESS

Semtex451
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So for the simpleminded like myself, and presupposing the role should exist, what then should the new Commissioners agenda be exactly?

Say over the next 4 years.

Could we have that bullet-pointed?

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BuzzGasm: 9 Incredible Things You Never Knew About PLIERS!

Semtex451
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I wouldn't consider them Pliers, but a good idea for the next BuzzWonk

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Semtex451
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That BuzzGasm got me going. Now I lose a whole afternoon dribbling over RS, Farnell and Screwfix pages.

Corrrr.

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Windows Phone beats BLACKBERRY in mobe OS popularity stakes

Semtex451
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Tributes

"hardly anything for Microsoft to crow about and it's still bobbing along"

I'm enjoying these mini-tributes to Bob Crow, each one reminds me, and brings a little smile.

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How to shop wisely for the IT department of the future

Semtex451
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"If your IT department is inefficient it is entirely possible that the responsibility does not properly belong with the nerds who run it."

If Nerds ran it, it would be bloody-well efficient, its non-nerd, know-nothing tw*t managers that cause the inefficiencies.

End of rant. Calming down.

Phew

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X marks the... They SAID there was a mystery planet there – NASA

Semtex451
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Headmaster

Re: What it is right...

Or Johnny Vegas or the FSM, its still in peer review stage.

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Semtex451
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Re: Well, I'm glad there doesn't seem to be a Nemisis star...

Well in this here article :

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2014/03/05/dark_matter_killed_the_dinosaurs_boffins_suggest/

If correct, we might not have to wait so very long.

Pity that "stuff" is so tricky to put an X-mark on.

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Not just for Glasswipes: Google to drop SDK for all Android wearables

Semtex451
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Is the term "Glasswipe" the same as "Glasshole"?

I'm certain there's folk hereabouts that can do better than either.........

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Florida bloke cuffed for pit bull shag outrage

Semtex451
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Go

This IS a story

.....not like that pen shortage dross from earlier today.

Thank you.

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Police pen shortage threatens Irish public order

Semtex451
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IT Angle

Slow news day? It comes to something when El Reg has to scan the Irish Independant for news and then picks a non-story with all the relevance of parochial tittle-tattle.

We expect better..

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Bugger the jetpack, where's my 21st-century Psion?

Semtex451
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Pint

I miss my Psion 5, always had build quality issues with it tho, then it got nicked.

:(

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Roll up, roll up for the Commentards' Ball

Semtex451
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Why did you have to pick my wife's birthday?

Now she'll be heart broken

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Voracious alien flatworm hits French in the escargots

Semtex451
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Re: Just add Garlic ,Herbs & Wine

Look.. we had all agreed we were nuking the frogs

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Very fabric of space-time RIPPED apart in latest Hubble pic

Semtex451
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Re: Blue jellyfish-like tendrils?

I agree, this could be the first, out of focus photo... of you know who.

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Anti-snoop Blackphone hits shelves in June: NOW we'll see how much you value privacy

Semtex451
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Black Helicopters

I hope for all our sakes that this phone really takes off.

That would send a strong message to govt, telcos, and manufacturers that privacy still counts for something.

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iOS 7: Even if you don't jailbreak your iPhone, bugs STILL CREEP IN

Semtex451
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Pint

"In the meantime it reckons the only way for iOS users to avoid the security risk is to use the iOS task manager to stop the apps from running in the background"

So the only way.... is to close ....the running app??

And this is the extent of the threat?

But I dare say it's only right that EL Reg put the fear of the Spaghetti Monster into us all, now and again.

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Samsung and Apple BEWARE: Huawei is coming to eat your lunch

Semtex451
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Re: Pronouciation

I think you have to modulate the sound at the right points by moving the back of your tongue to roof of your palate. Or some-such.

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Java or .NET bod in the Midlands? Congrats - you've got a DOUBLE DIGIT payrise

Semtex451
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Re: If I were a central banker...

It will, and sooner than Carney thinks.

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Amazon fuses LoveFilm, subs service, calls it Prime Instant Video

Semtex451
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Re: Meh

Agreed, and if we can get free delivery from Prime on top of disk rental in the post, then this is good news.

Not that Meh, after all?

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