* Posts by joeW

296 posts • joined 9 Mar 2012

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There’s a whole mobile world out there – here’s how to manage it

joeW
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Re: Say what you like about Microsoft, but...

Yes, they're definitely Embracing us.

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Radio 4 and Dr K on programming languages: Full of Java Kool-Aid

joeW
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Re: "soi-disant"?

"if the presenter was a guy and not a gal would they be getting so much sniping"

On the Register? Yes, absolutely and 100%. Equal Opportunity Slagging is one of my favourite things about this place.

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Android gets biometric voice unlocking

joeW
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My voice is my passport

Verify me.

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Steely wonder? It's blind to 4G and needs armour: Samsung Galaxy S6

joeW
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Re: Quite sad..

Note 4 is pretty much a flagship model, that has a removable battery. Probably the last one that will unfortunately.

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joeW
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So...

You're going to start driving a Volvo?

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I helped Amazon.com find an XSS hole and all I got was this lousy t-shirt

joeW
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Re: In a word: YES

"Quick show of hands. How many El Reggers have been invited to work for free after pointing out faults and flaws in company websites?"

I'll go you one better. After declining their offer to discuss a security issue I discovered with a site's dev guys, they threatened legal action. Basically "help us fix it for free or we'll have the cops nab you for hacking".

I politely declined that little offer too.

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Noobs can pwn world's most popular BIOSes in two minutes

joeW
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Re: This wouldn't be (much of) a problem...

And how would a mobo jumper or 'A "locked/unlocked" dip switch beside the sim socket' help, when the threat discussed in the article is one that requires physical access to the machine in question?

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You – yes, YOU – can now 3D print your very own Paul McCartney

joeW
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What's with the dislike?

Did Paul call to all of your houses and take a shit on your cat or something?

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Samsung puts eight-core processor IN A WATCH

joeW
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Re: Whisky in the jar

It's unlikely to alter the taste of a smartwatch either.

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W*nkers of the world unite to SAVE THE PLANET one jerk-off at a time

joeW
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Re: the French term for "wanker"

"Anglais"

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Don't touch me up there! Photoshop creator appeals for 'ethical' use

joeW
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Re: Bring out the GIMP!

It's also second rate compared to Photoshop. I use both on a daily basis - GIMP in work, because my employer is too cheap to buy Photoshop, and Photoshop at home (where lets just say price isn't such a huge consideration) - and honestly something that takes me 10 minutes in Photoshop can take upwards of an hour in GIMP.

In the Photoshop 6 era I would have said they were comparable products - not anymore though which is a shame.

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Microsoft leaves the Rooms. How will Windows Phone OS users make to do lists?

joeW
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Re: "a feature which would be a very successful product for a start-up"

Would there be any real barrier to MS spinning off the functionality to a stand-alone app, maybe handing it over to the community as open source? Seems like that would be a win/win for all concerned.

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KUSHINIKIZA! Google Translate SAVES BABY in Irish roadside birth

joeW
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They got lucky

I can tell you, mobile reception on Cork roadsides is usually pretty dire.

Good thinking on their part though, h'on the lads!

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El Reg's plucky Playmonaut eyes suborbital rocket shot

joeW
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Re: You mean I can build an open source rocket to hit targets several miles away? Cool!

Several miles? If you get a good arc on it, I'd say further than that. How would the Iron Dome missile defense system deal with projectiles coming in from low orbit I wonder?

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CAR? Check. DRIVER? Nope. OK, let's go, says British govt

joeW
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Re: Would you actually, really get in one?

The car that you sit in and drive every day is also designed and built by humans, f'crissake -- y'know, error-prone, fallible HUMANS. The other drivers you share the roads with every day, drivers who hold your life in their hands every time your car is within 20 meters of theirs.... humans, f'crissake -- y'know, error-prone, fallible HUMANS.

The only way to be safe is to stay at home in bed. And even then your house might get hit by an airplane which drops out of the sky due to an autopilot software glitch. After all, you know who programs autopilot software....

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Post-pub nosh neckfiller: The Red Dwarf chilli chutney egg sarnie

joeW
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Re: Encona?

Raw Carolina Reapers have absolutely nothing on a decent extract sauce. Try some "20 Minute Burn" if you feel like putting that to the test!

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'YOUTUBE is EVIL': Somebody had a tape running, Google...

joeW
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Should be easy enough to clear up

"Keating appears to have kept verbatim notes – strongly indicating that a tape was running – and she's now published the transcript of the conversation"

If she has a recording, lets hear it. If it's the same as her transcript, Youtube is over a barrel.

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Apple's Beats, Google, and Sony hammered with unpaid royalty claim

joeW
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Re: Sony

Yes she does - a song called "Ironic" that doesn't contain a single example of irony? That's pretty damned ironic.

Don't ya think?

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Please use TWO HANDS to access AdultFriendFinder

joeW
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I had noticed this

NoScript saved my arse a few times when I mistyped the URL in question. What happened to my arse when I typed the URL correctly however is between me and the gods...

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Hollywood vs hackers: Vulture cracks Tinseltown keyboard cornballs

joeW
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Re: SNEAKERS

I especially enjoyed the realistic method Robert Redford's character employed to defeat a supposedly unhackable electronic door lock.

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joeW
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SNEAKERS

I'm surprised Sneakers wasn't on this list - one of the more realistic Hollywood depictions of hacking. That probably says more about how cruddy the rest are than it does about the particular accuracy of Sneakers, but still.

"No more secrets, Marty"

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Post-pub nosh neckfiller: 1.5 MILLION SCOVILLE masala omelette

joeW
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Mushroom

Re: Only half the story

The best exit strategy in these situations is to put a pack of baby wipes in the fridge the night before, and bring them with you for your morning crap.

Source - ate a naga jolokia on a dare last week.

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'80s hacker turned journo, IT crime ace Steve Gold logs off

joeW
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Re: Hackers Handbook

I read that book when I was around 12 years old (early 90s) - a lot of the information was outdated by then... but an awful lot of it wasn't.

RIP Mr Gold.

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BAN email footers – they WASTE my INK, wails Ctrl+P MP

joeW
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Re: can we ban printers instead?

Star LC-10 or GTFO.

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You have a 'SIMPLE QUESTION'? Well, the answer is NO

joeW
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Re: says:

No, the ones you really have to watch out for are the beancounters who know how to use Excel and absolutely fuck-all else . They'll use Excel as a spreadsheet, as a database, as a reporting server, as a word processor, as a design tool, as every fucking thing you can imagine through the use of ancient and hideous VB Macros and obscure eldritch data connectors.

Then one day, when the crude OS they've Frankenstein-created from their spreadsheet goes tits-up, who do they call? And more to the point, whose fault do they reckon it is?

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LOHAN's Plucky Playmonaut touches down at Spaceport America

joeW
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Re: so does this mean

Project headed up by Dr. Lest-N-Furter?

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E-cigarettes fingered as source of NASTY VIRUS

joeW
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Re: Use a "USB Condom".

Even that is often unnecessary; I'm looking at an e-cig USB charger right now, and it only has connectors for the power pins present on the connector, no data pins.

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BOFH: Everyone deserves a little DOWNTIME

joeW
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Pint

Back to Friday BOFH?

Much better, thank you.

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Ten excellent FREE PC apps to brighten your Windows

joeW
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Re: Duplicati and VLC

Something I only discovered recently is that VLC can even play a video that's been split into multiple smaller RAR files (you know the type, *.r01, *.r02,...*.r15, *.rar). Just drop the .rar into VLC and boom - saves so much fucking time.

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Apple bitchslaps iPhone rival Xiaomi: World No 1? That's BIG TALK

joeW
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Re: Forget Shipments..

Exactly! If one company is shipping more, but another company is making more cash, it's a perfect metric to spot which of the two is flogging overpriced products!

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HUMAN DNA 'will be FOUND ON MOON' – rockin' boffin Brian Cox

joeW
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Ah, good old El Reg

Whatever about the headlines, it's the URLs that are the real stars of the show.

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Call the Commish! Ireland dragged into Microsoft dispute over alleged drug traffic data

joeW
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The reality is that they do...and that they are.

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Has your STARFISH been DRIBBLING awful SLIME? Scientists now know WHY

joeW
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So

Not Fukushima Fallout then? I'll be over here waiting for the hippy sites to publish corrections.

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GOD particle MAY NOT BE GOD particle: Scientists in shock claim

joeW
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Re: Man's infinite ignorance

Who said they believe it to be the tiniest?

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Ireland's data cops: Yes, we probed LinkedIn. Don't ask what we found

joeW
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Re: Lucky break

They're no doubt fuelled by jumbo breakfast rolls from the Centra next door though, not much will get past them.

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Met Office: 2014 was FIFTEENTH WARMEST UK SUMMER on record

joeW
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Re: We have needed some balance...and of course some facts.

Indeed. Do let us know when they arrive.

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This is why we CAN have nice things: Samsung Galaxy Alpha

joeW
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If you don't mind extra bulk, check out a ZeroLemon battery for your Note 2. It's essentially three Note 2 batteries stuck together giving ~9000mAh of power - easily enough for three days use, and I've been able to stretch that out to five with light usage.

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MARS NEEDS WOMEN, claims NASA pseudo 'naut: They eat less

joeW
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Re: This'll never work

Tell me you're joking. Please, please tell me you don't actually think menstruation or lack thereof is in any way influenced by lunar gravity.

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iPhone 6 shunned by fanbois in Apple's GREAT FAIL of CHINA

joeW
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Headmaster

Langley?

Don't you mean Fort Meade?

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ONE MILLION people already running Windows 10

joeW
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a small tinker

What do diminutive gypsies have to do with this?

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NO MORE DOUBLE IRISH, thunders Dublin. Erm, from 2020 that is

joeW
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Pint

Re: Guinness

Murphys - owned by Heinekin these days.

Beamish is better anyway. But also owned by Heinekin.

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Adobe spies on reading habits over unencrypted web because your 'privacy is important'

joeW
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Re: please, nobody say GIMP

Dammit Bob!

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joeW
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Re: Or it would have if I'd let it...

I haven't used their Reader or Acrobat software in years, and Flash is installed but under tight controls.

I can't entirely cut out Adobe though, until credible alternatives to Photoshop, Lightroom and Illustrator come along (please, nobody say GIMP).

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Windows 10 feedback: 'Microsoft, please do a deal with Google to use its browser'

joeW
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Re: "...cannot be legitmately described as a 'frying' pan"

Why not? What do you call your frying pan when it's hanging on the wall of your kitchen (at a temperature far below what is neccessary for frying)?

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Apple tries to kill iWorm: Zombie botnet feasting on Mac brains

joeW
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Re: Will you make up your mind.

The three biggest lies in computing...

Macs don't get viruses

Linux never gets hacked

Windows is user-friendly

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Desktop, schmesktop: Microsoft reveals next WINDOWS SERVER

joeW
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Re: User Interface

Confusing PowerShell with CMD?

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George Clooney, WikiLeaks' lawyer wife hand out burner phones to wedding guests

joeW
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Re: sign of the times

I believe that may, in fact, have been the joke.

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It's official: EU chiefs WILL probe Apple's Irish tax deal

joeW
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I think I speak for a lot of Irish people when I quietly mutter "Uh-oh..."

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Tearful LOHAN Playmonaut bids adiós to Spain

joeW
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Surely it's Lindsay who should be waiting outside El Reg Towers, wearing an SPB T-shirt?

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