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* Posts by FatGerman

56 posts • joined 2 Mar 2012

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If this doesn't terrify you... Google's computers OUTWIT their humans

FatGerman

Re: @janvand

Nah, I've written masses of code that I can no longer comprehend. They probably just forgot to comment it.

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UK gov's smart meter dream unplugged: A 'colossal waste of cash'

FatGerman
Thumb Down

@Ledswinger

I was starting to think you were talking sense, and then you went and did the energy supplier thing of calling climate change "claptrap", thus proving you're full of shit.

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Mint 15 freshens Ubuntu's bad bits

FatGerman
Thumb Down

Re: WINE or VM?

Wine, or a VM, is OK if you're browsing the web or tapping away in a text editor. Not so good if I want to have Photoshop and Lightroom going with proper camera-to-screen-to-print colour management and access to the 16-bit printer driver, to quote just one problem. There are no native Linux alternatives. The Linux world doesn't seem to realise that it's Apps (in the modern parlance) that people want, not operating systems. (Don't get me started on the photography software in Linux, all of it falls well below what even a semi-amateur like me needs for productivity, sadly).

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Google staffing boss: Our old hiring procedures were 'worthless'

FatGerman
WTF?

World's cleverest company states the obvious

Er, I've been interviewing people for 20 years and I figured that out after about 5 interviews. And I didn't need an algorithm to do it. Does this qualify me for a job at Google?

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More than half of Windows 8 users just treat it like Windows 7

FatGerman
FAIL

Errrr... define "launch"

This sounds like another meaningless set of numbers to me. Define "launch". I only "launch" my email program once per day but then it keeps running all day and gets used several times an hour. Similarly my browser. If I was using TIFKAM I'd be registering about 3 "launches" per day (given that there aren't yet TIFKAM versions of code editors or photoshop or etc etc) but that doesn't mean I'm not using the interface* and it doesn't mean I won't use it more when TIFKAM versions of the apps I actually want to use are released.

*I actually use a Mac, but from what I've seen of Win8, it looks like a pretty nice touch interface with some nice features. Shame that touch interfaces are useless for real work, but hey....

1
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Coke? Windows 8 is Microsoft's 'Vista moment'. Again

FatGerman
Coffee/keyboard

Hang on to you old hardware

Looks like, sadly, Microsoft may have banged the first nail in the coffin of the traditional computer. From now on the mass market will be phones and tablets and any of us that want to do real work will have to buy one of them specialised gizmos with a keyboard, and pay the associated premium for specialised hardware.

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Ubuntu without the 'U': Booting the Big Four remixes

FatGerman
Headmaster

Re: Exactly

"A century from now when people ask "what did Microsoft do" the amswer will be "they invented the taskbar"

No they didn't Acorn invented that with RiscOS, about 4 years before Windows95 appeared.

Waits for someone to chip in with an even earlier example....

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Linux in 2013: 'Freakishly awesome' – and who needs a fork?

FatGerman
Stop

It's just a bunch of kids with a hobby

Quite. That amount of code churn implies one or both of two things:

Firstly, it ain't finished and certainly isn't well tested. Secondly, the people working on it are too keen on playing with it.

The upshot of one or both of these things is instability and uncertainty over whether something that works today will work tomorrow when you apply those updates.

I speak as a Linux user of 6 years. I quickly learned my lesson not to use it for anything important unless updates were banned.

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AdBlock Plus BLOCKED from Google Play

FatGerman
Windows

Re: More adverts, everywhere.

"Computers are supposed to relieve us of drudgery and mindless tasks, not create new boring tasks for us."

Ha! 99% of the mindless drudgery in the world begins with sitting down in front of a computer.

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Hands-on with Ubuntu's rudimentary phone and tablet OS

FatGerman
Thumb Down

Re: A diamond in the rough

It's a Canonical product, therefore it will *always* be of alpha quality. It's nice to see new concepts and new people doing stuff, but Canonical don't appear to understand the notion of testing or quality control so even if it did make it into a phone I'd predict a 90% returns rate.

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We're not making this up: Apple trademarks the SHOP

FatGerman
Paris Hilton

Re: It's over between us

"the technological equivalent of Paris Hilton"

Thank you, I've been searching for a similie/metaphor to describe Apple and you, sir, have completely nailed it. In the words of South Park, "Stupid Spoiled Whore".

Sent from my iPhone, smeared in the sticky film of shame.

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FatGerman
Windows

Erm..

Kind of looks like my local pub. They sell apples too, albeit of the fermented variety.

Mind you, the Feng Shui's all over the place, so I doubt this will do Apple any good at all.

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The Spherical Cow lands, spits out Anaconda

FatGerman
FAIL

Re: Distros - quickie analysis

ANY of these distros pre-installed on desktops/laptops with fair pricing would sell well! The year of Linux on the Desktop depends on when MS loses its iron-grip on the OEMs. Of course ANdroid is also poised.

Yes they would, and then they'd mostly be returned as people discover it doesn't run Call of Duty/Word/Excel/Lightroom/Photoshop - i.e. the stuff they're used to. People buy computers to run software, not to stare at the pretty interface. Nobody who wants photoshop is going to be satisifed with gimp, even if they can figure out that gimp is what they need to install, etc etc.

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Boffins create quantum gas with temperature BELOW absolute zero

FatGerman
Mushroom

My brain just melted

Why do I persist in reading stuff like this on a Saturday?

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BOSS Bang boffins: DARK ENERGY spreading across the Universe

FatGerman
Holmes

Re: It's the best theory we have so far

"How about this: our models are wrong."

That's odd, because they've been working and predicting things for literally decades!

*Incomplete* is the word you are looking for. If they were 'wrong' we wouldn't have managed to build all these neat toys that let us bicker from miles away.

There does seem to be a habit in modern physics of inventing new stuff to keep the old theories working. As a scientist I was taught that if the evidence doesn't fit the theory, then the theory is wrong (I'll accept "incomplete"). The trend with physics these days seems to be that if the evidence doesn't fit the theory, speculate about what evidence we must be missing. It's almost a religious mindset, clinging to the Standard Model, since if if that's proven wrong then cosmologists (at least) have to start again, and many of them will have wasted their entire lives. Vested interests are as powerful in theoretical physics as they are in any other area of life.

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LOHAN slips BRA over BOOBIES in ballocket backronym buffoonery

FatGerman

Not the board itself,

..but I'm sure it would be best housed in a Spaceplane Launcher Utility Turret

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Whopping supersonic-car rocket rattles idyllic Cornwall

FatGerman
Facepalm

Re: pandering

Oh please. The units aren't important in an article, it's getting the meaning of them across that matters. I'm British and I use pounds, miles, feet, and inches because they mean something to me. I have to convert metric to imperial so I can get a sense of what it means. Bloody SI Nazis, you'll have us all going into pubs and asking for a 0.56826125 litre of beer.

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Ubuntu 12.10: More to Um Bongo Linux than Amazon ads

FatGerman
Headmaster

Re: What if...

No, because it's open source and therefore I can remove the adverts/spyware myself. Plus I wouldn't give anyone money for what is basically a rolling beta that breaks every time I upgrade it. Make it as stable as the distro it's based on (Debian) and then I might consider it.

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FatGerman
FAIL

"...because the only way to learn what's not perfect is to have other people - real people - use it."

This is true. So why not, before dumping yet another load of half-finished shit into a release, spend some real time beta testing it. And then actually fix some of the bugs that get reported. Ubuntu's current strategy is to release a beta about 3 weeks before the release, let about 2 people use it, then release it anyway. This is why fewer and fewer people are using it, because they're utterly beholden to their release schedule, and making things actually work is secondary.

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FatGerman
Windows

Re: wtf?

"It's almost as if the people at Canonical don't remember the 90s. Active Desktop anyone?"

I don't think any of the script kiddies responsible for this rubbish were even born in the '90s.

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Satellite broadband rollout for all in US: But Europe just doesn't get it

FatGerman
FAIL

Re: A few points for you all.....

"While this has been the case up till now, I think that 4g mobile Internet could provide a fairly cost-effective solution for many rural areas where land line coverage is poor or non-existent."

There are plenty of us living in rural areas who are still waiting for decent 2G coverage on the 1800MHz band that 4G will run on. I agree that 4G mobile would be better than the "broadband" provided by BT out here, but the chances of them building an antenna to cover the 14 people on this side of the hill are nil.

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FatGerman
Stop

Third world backwaters

"(*often the landline broadband is so awful that you can't stream YouTube or do video skyping)"

Oh one shudders at the hardships you poor, poor foreigners have to suffer. I'm in rural Wales. I struggle to post this. A mobile phone signal would be nice too. But you know what? I manage. Go outside.

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Made for each other: liquid nitrogen and 1,500 ping-pong balls

FatGerman
FAIL

This video has been removed by the user

BAh!

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Governments block YouTube over that video

FatGerman
Childcatcher

Re: atheist 'sense'

I don't count myself as an atheist, but I am most definitely not religious. I don't come from the angle that "there is definitely no God", rather I come from the angle of "oh yeah, some people think there's a god, well it really doesn't bother me one way or the other". Religion, or the absence of it, simply has no relevance in my life.

So, how do I know what's right and wrong you seem to be asking. Simple. I was taught right and wrong by my parents, by growing up in a society where there is not just right and wrong - good and evil - but a whole spectrum of middle ground, and from my empathy with others and my humanity.

From this point of view I can see quite clearly that while making a film that mocks someone's beloved Prophet may be insensitive (this is the middle ground I spoke of), reacting to that by rioting, attacking foreign embassies, and murdering ambassadors is most definitely wrong, no matter how offensive the film is perceived to be. You talk of knee jerk reactions, well I wonder which group is having the biggest jerk.

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Dropbox drops JavaScript, brews CoffeeScript

FatGerman
Facepalm

Phython? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

"The developers are Python-lovers, "

Lord preserve us from significant whitespace. Anyone who likes a language in which the space character is important enough that it becomes part of the code structure needs a big kick in the head.

0
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iPhone 5: skinny li'l fella with better display, camera, software

FatGerman
Windows

44% this, 33% that

Shouting percentages at me will not impress me. What I want to know is, can I hold it in my left hand without having to buy an "optional" extra case for it? If I can't do that then your phone design is shit, mate. End of.

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Hubble spots ancient spiral galaxy that SHOULD NOT EXIST

FatGerman
Facepalm

Re: Where's the science?

The best thing about that post is that it makes me realise that, when I see something I think might be a huge conspiracy, I should stand back, examine the evidence, and take a rational view of it instead of immediately sounding off like a ranting moron with his head up his arse.

You, sir, are an example to us all.

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Pyrotechnic boffin poised to light LOHAN's fire

FatGerman
Coffee/keyboard

Re: "The solution? A more potent igniter"

> True to the spirit of Real Engineering:

> - if it doesn't fit, force it

> - If it can't be forced, use a bigger hammer

That's not engineering, that's proper British Bodging - a proud tradition.

Going by my experience as a 'software engineer' an engineering solution would be:

1. Try it again to see if it happens every time

2. Have lots of meetings in which nothing concrete is agreed but lots of managers tell you how important it is to fix it quickly

3. Under management pressure come up with some half assed bodge

4. Implement half-assed bodge

5. Spend the next 4 weeks explaining to various managers why the half-assed bodge doesn't work properly

Like you, I used to think that engineering was about making things. But eventually I came to realise that it's about dodging blame, writing powerpoint slides, and guessing how long things will take before you do them.

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KIT drives off with memory win: 1-bit-per-MOLECULE storage

FatGerman
FAIL

Yes it's stupid now...

... but do you remember those 1MB Winchester disks that used to take up an entire tabletop and couldn't withstand a small nudge without crashing? Yes, that was only 30-odd years ago. It's called research and development. The emphasis here is now on the *development*.

Bloody journalists.

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Dell seeks Linux fans to try cut-price Ubuntu Ultrabook

FatGerman
FAIL

Re: re: Performance of open source drivers

My Samsung 17" laptop, when using the oss nvidia driver, has no support for 3d acceleration or accelerated video playback. It overheats and shuts down after playing full screen 1080p H.264 video for 10 minutes, at very poor quality and with choppy playback if I so much as try running anything else.

When I install the proprietary driver, everything works wonderfully. CPU usage while playing that video is 4%. I can even compile code in the background while it plays.

So yes, the proprietary driver kicks the arse of the oss driver, and always has. After all, nvidia know how their hardware works. I have no problem with this, and nor does anybody who lives in the real world.

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US defence biz fined for busting China arms embargo

FatGerman

One law for corporations...

... another law for individuals.

America truly is the land of the free(dom from prosecution if you've got your hands down enough senator's pants). I don't hate America, but I do utterly despise anyone who thinks this is right.

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Bill Gates: iPad is OK, but what Apple really needs is a SURFACE

FatGerman

Re: He's dead wrong...

"There appears to be no disadvantage that the Surface has over a laptop or over a tablet - it is both"

Or it is neither, depending on your point of view.

Can I plug it into my 28 inch monitor and firewire audio interface so I can run Logic Audio on it in my studio? Thought not. That's what my laptop's for. I'm a creator of content, I need devices to get that content into the digital world. Poking at shiny things with my stubby fingers is of no interest to me.

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Facebook: Our phone app DID seize your email

FatGerman
Megaphone

Bug... hmmmm

So, the bug is: that there happens to be some code in there, accidentally one must assume, that is able to modify your contacts, specifically by doing a search and replace of email addresses. Erm, sorry.. how did code like that get in there by accident? Or if we assume the code is there on purpose but this is a bug in that code, then for what purpose is that code in there in the first place? Why do you want to mess with my contacts?

Or are you just spouting bollocks Mr Zuckerberg?

See, they know that it'll take a lot to make people stop using Facebook, since for many of us it has become something we like and use a lot, despite our better judgement. So they feel they can just do what they like and we'll put up with it. And apparently they can all sleep at night and live with the fact that they're devious, lying, morally repugnant pieces of slime.

I'm going now to post that on my wall.

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Millionaire Ubuntu space nerd Shuttleworth live on The Reg

FatGerman
Linux

Re: Ubuntu out of beta yet ?

*buntu is a permanent rolling beta. It always will be while they try and enforce a regular 6 month release cycle on software that's written mainly by people in their spare time.

If it's stability you want, use Debian, but then you don't get the benefit of the actual good stuff Canonical has done on installation and you may well end up with a bricked laptop, as I do every time I try Debian.

The year of Linux on the desktop - yes, that's how long it takes to get it to work. And I speak as someone who's been using it regularly for 4 years.

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Apple hardware fixer Bob Mansfield retires from Cupertino

FatGerman
Headmaster

Proper Engineering...

As a proper engineer, Bob is obviously a man who realises that he doesn't need 87 million dollars because he already has enough and can therefore retire. Good man, well done, an example to everybody.

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Microsoft to devs: Don't ruin Win 8 launch with crap code

FatGerman
Headmaster

Foundational?

If their code is as bad as their English then I doubt anyone will be able to understand how to use the APIs, let alone operate the interface.

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Google Knowledge Graph straddles semantic web and Star Trek

FatGerman
Headmaster

Re: Just search for what I entered

And there speaks a geek. The problem with your approach is that you have to talk to the computer in its own language. This simply doesn't work. You know what made Google so popular? It was by providing an interface that normal people could use. They don't have to get to grips with brackets and logic, they just type stuff into it in a way that makes sense to *them*. I remember being amazed by it when after some time of failing to get altavista to find what I wanted by 'narrowing down my search criteria', my mate simply went to Google (which I'd never used before) and typed in, in plain English, the question we wanted the answer to. The answer we needed was the first hit. I've never used another search engine since.

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Mozilla and Google blast IE-only Windows on ARM

FatGerman
Linux

Re: "Of course you could just use an OS THAT DOESN'T TRY TO RESTRICT YOU !"

"Choice for its own sake leads to a very poor user experience. There is very solid science behind the "KISS" design philosophy the more successful consumer electronics companies apply to their products."

As a long-term Linux user, I simply couldn't agree more. I'm sick to death of having so much bloody choice. Especially when it's choice between 4 things that all don't quite work but in different ways. These days I just want stuff that works. I bought a Mac. Sorry.

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Red faces abound as boffins build gamma ray lens

FatGerman
Headmaster

Re: Researchers...

Give them some credit. Some of the very best discoveries come about when people say "Well, I don't expect it'll work but it's the best idea I've got and if it does work the implications are enormous".

Your comment suggests a complete ignorance of the motivation for, and methodology behind, a large proportion of all useful scientific research. I, on the other hand, spent an entire year firing lasers at a solution of fairy liquid in a futile attempt to develop a new spectroscopic technique. It was the best idea I had at the time and I didn't get paid a fucking penny for it.

Just saying.

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Microsoft kills Windows Live brand

FatGerman
Linux

"Today the expectation is that a modern device comes with services as well as apps for communication and sharing. There is no “separate brand” to think about or a separate service to install"

Congratulations Microsoft, welcome to the late 20th century.

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iTunes fanbois outraged by Apple's sex-life quiz probe

FatGerman
Facepalm

Re: Demonstrates three things which would otherwise be difficult to believe...

Well obviously, we all work in the IT industry because we're work shy hippy layabouts. What's your excuse?

0
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FatGerman
Gimp

Re: re making stuff up

"It's no harder than having to remember a dozen different passwords or differing complexity here at work."

I've got a pretty good memory for facts, but I struggle to remember two passwords because they have to be made-up stuff with "at least one digit and one capital letter". If I start making up answers to security questions as well I'll start doubting my own identity pretty soon.

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Vote now for the WORST movie EVER

FatGerman
WTF?

Catwoman

How the hell did Catwoman not even make the list? If you can put Halle Berry in a leather catsuit and still make a film that I would rather gouge my eyes out with teaspoons than watch again, you have made the worst movie ever. QED.

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'Intelligent systems' poised to outsell PCs, smartphones

FatGerman

I'll believe a system is intelligent only when I ask it to so some extremely boring, repetitive task and it just says "No".

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Hands on with Kinect Star Wars

FatGerman
Pint

I think the reviewer's thoughts about the age range are probably right. I've played a few Kinect games at a friend's house and they amused me for a couple of minutes and then that was it. His two children, aged 9 and 5, both love the thing and can't get enough of even the simplest games. It's fer kids innit?

With my cynical old man hat on, I think the Princess Leia dancing scene is only there to give the dads something to take their minds off the pain of watching small children wave their arms and scream at a TV.

When I want to wave my arms and scream at a TV, I watch Question Time. It must be a generational thing.

3
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iPad queue hog doesn’t want it, won’t be first

FatGerman

I amongst all the old fart wingeing, name calling, OS fascism, and general childishness that makes the Reg comments section the delightful slice of life that it is, I'm surprised that nobody has commented on the fact that there seems to be good money to be made by sleeping on the streets.

Let's hope Cameron doesn't find out about this or it'll be Tory "Restart" policy by next month.

There's that's added politics to the mix. Life is complete again.

0
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LOHAN's fantastical flying truss takes to the air

FatGerman
Paris Hilton

Ancilliaries?

How do you plan on mounting cameras etc on an inclined truss? I wondered if some kind of Spaceplane Launcher Utility Turret could be designed, they're not at all hard to mount.

Paris, for reasons that should be obvious.

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Samsung Galaxy S II punters get a lick of Ice Cream Sarnie

FatGerman
Pirate

Re: "Given that most phones are replaced in 12-18 month cycles"

"£300/year for my SII is hardly huge amounts of money."

Well that depends on the size of your wallet and the priorities of your life. As far as I'm concerned, £300/year is a ridiculous amount of money to pay for a phone, so I don't think you can make blanket statements like that.

"Mobiles haven't been about making/receiving phone calls since the iPhone was released."

Believe it or not, as far as the carriers go mobiles are very much about making and receiving calls because that's where a large part of their revenue comes from.

The handset manufacturers, on the other hand, have known for a long while that if everybody kept their new phone for 5 years phones would have to cost £1000 each or most manufacturers would go bankrupt. Their business model relies on people buying new handsets every 18 months or so, and this is why we're constantly being offered new "features" we "can't do without". Apple, of course, have been selling hardware for years and understood this better than anyone.

I used to work in the mobile phone industry. I got out partly because I realised it really is mainly about selling as much unfinished, malfunctional shit to as many gullible idiots as possible.

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Cambridge student wins 'Hack Idol'

FatGerman
Big Brother

Re: Next challenge: a more holistic view

He's either talking about covert surveillance of every internet user to spot hackers before they germinate, or he's talking about a pre-emptive strike. Presumably against the "cyber"men?

He is Tony Blair and I claim my five pounds.

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Google to app devs: Use our pay system ... OR ELSE

FatGerman
WTF?

Re: FatGerman

So which parts of my privacy am I bartering? The T&Cs just say they have access to basically everything on my phone... but then so do the paid apps I've looked at. What's the difference with paid apps?

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