* Posts by ChrisBedford

133 posts • joined 27 Feb 2012

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Would YOU start a fire? TRAPPED in a new-build server farm

ChrisBedford
Pint

Re: Done the reverse before

a pat on the back and a full night of overtime

You sneaky rat. I'd have done the same ;)

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ChrisBedford

threw a swivel chair through the larger of the windows

Nowadays, of course, said plate glass would be bulletproof (or at least chairproof) so at best you are going to cause a few small cracks...

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ChrisBedford

Re: Design flaw

simple push to exit button would be more than sufficient

Indeed, and when carrying notebook, toolbox, other toolbox, miscellaneous flyleads, and sundry hardware having to fumble around with a swipe card can be, umm, the last thing you need.

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ChrisBedford
FAIL

Re: stern words warranted

starts beeping if you havent moved for over 60 seconds

There would be a constant chorus of beeps if you implemented this at any given South African government office

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ChrisBedford

Re: sounds like the site operator couldhave been fined really

sounds more like some 1800's factory not a data centre

Huhm or some 20-teens sweatshop in China or Bangladesh or the Philippines. Or South Africa.

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Geek's Guide to Britain – now a book. Permission to geek out granted

ChrisBedford

Re: You had me up to...

I thought about Sky, but there is even MORE advertising as WELL as a subscription

If Sky is anything like the satellite provider in South Africa, the majority of its ads are *for* the provider, and go on for two minutes at a time.

Never seen the point of advertising to customers you already have. Preaching to the choir, isn't it?

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The least stressful job in the US? Information security analyst, duh

ChrisBedford

Re: reporter worst job, not so much

never done the job. I have, and while thoroughly stressed at certain times, enjoyed it very much

Unclear which job you are talking about, reporter or soldier, but I'll assume reporter.

Also it's important to note that stress and enjoyment are not related. Otherwise there would be no soldiers and everyone would be queueing up to be a - what was that one again? Information security analyst, whatever that is. Some poeple love being stressed, others fall to pieces. Some love the quiet life, others go spare. It's all about the individual...

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The Windows Phone story: From hope to dusty abandonware

ChrisBedford

Re: @ac

"IF they had made the GUI like apple or android or ???

y'know small icons, with a pretty picture behind it, make a 'floating picture' one that can be re-sized, with the small icons round it????

then it would have 'taken off'...."

Uh, then it would have looked like Android or IOS and it wouldn't have been unique. Nowadays, if you see a smartphone screen you have to look for (small) telltales to know what type of phone you are holding in your hand so you can know how to proceed. The big differentiator with WP was that it didn't look like anything elese.

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US nuke arsenal runs on 1970s IBM 'puter waving 8-inch floppies

ChrisBedford

Re: Addendum

"For me, at least, that first PDF copy seems to be corrupted - many of the pages from #3 onwards are blank."

In fact the first page is blank, followed by the two frontispiece photos on 2 and 3, and then blanks on every page from 4 onwards.

I found a couple of other sources of PDF versions of this book, some more phishing-oriented than others ;-). Eventually I had to use usenet, which turned up a page-image version, not text. Not great, but readable.

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I am sending pouting selfies to a robot. Its AI is well buff

ChrisBedford

Re: Read it till this point

"Clearly, whoever wrote the AI which looked for "symmetry first" has failed to do the most basic research in his field."

Yes well maybe that line was shortened for simplicity. Acutely assymmetrical faces are (much) creepier than the perfectly symmetrical (e.g. Charles Laughton's Quasimodo) so the algorithm is *probably* looking for *near* symmetry. I'm guessing someone just didn't feel like explaining all the detail - and he obviously didn't need to, the commentards have certainly taken care of that chore.

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Microsoft boots fake fix-it search ads

ChrisBedford

Re: Also, web sites don't help

"the front page doesn't have a "downloads" link and the Support link on the front page takes you to a page of FAQs, one of which might say something along the lines of "Where do I find updated Drivers" which will take you to a link that says "Find your product" which will take you to a link that says "Support" that takes you back to the FAQs"

Oh thank God I thought it was just me. There have been times I have wanted to scream with frustration at websites like this. Sometimes in desperation I just click links at random and find the download I am looking for under a totally unlikely heading like "troubleshooting" or worse.

More than once I have ended up throwing away the widget in question and buying one from a competitor.

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Guilty! Trump delivers orange justice to Amazon

ChrisBedford

Re: Dump! Dump! Dump!

"He is now the presumed Republican candidate. And this just scares the holy crap out of me"

I wouldn't be too concerned. As I understand it, there is a significant section of the population that is not a member of either party, leaving a huge, so far untested, vote available to dump him on his orange arse. A 'swing vote', I guess that's called.

Add to that the number of Republicans who haven't been turning out at the primaries or caucuses because they figured the conclusion was foregone, and I'm calling November in favour of the Democrat who wins that party's nomination. Trump is too far off to the right to get a majority of the population behind him - at least I hope to God that's so, because, as bad as he would be for America it would be that much worse for the rest of the world.

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NZ hotel bans cyclists' Lycra-clad loins

ChrisBedford

Well that was an incredibly rambling comment

"[...]enough of them learned (the hard way) that Mrs WolfFan has been known to be in that area, accompanied by Redrum the Attack Chiuhua and his BFF, Maragret Hilda the wolf[...]"

(and so on). Sorry, dozed off. Umm, your point was...?

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This headline will, in part, cost pepper-spraying University of California, Davis $175k

ChrisBedford

"cop [...] repeatedly told the students that they could either let the cops go or be sprayed"

Doesn't matter. (a) the armed side of a confrontation can't use excessive force against the unarmed side, and (b) don't write cheques you can't honour.

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ChrisBedford

Re: While you are spewing cash...

"The original source of Pike pepper-spraying 'activists' was largely fading into the background before this latest round of misbegotten thinking was aired"

Barbara Streisand Effect, all over again. I wonder how many times someone has to try this before it becomes a "known thing" that people try to avoid?

Given the average intellect on teh interwebs, I'm guessing it will never happen...

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Shopping for PCs? This is what you'll be offered in 2016

ChrisBedford

Re: Any news on laptop resolutions?

There is a big problem that major vendors, such as Dell, Lenovo and HP will announce systems (laptops/desktops/etc.) who's **WHOSE ;) spec sheet outline the availability of a range of supported CPU's, Screen resolutions, Memory, HDD/SSD, built in 3g, OS's etc. yet when you come to purchase they will only sell you "this months" configurations for your country

Exactly. Which is why I started fuming when I read this article. I am currently trying to find a halfway decent notebook PC for one of my clients - who typically buy between 6 and 10 new machines a year - and every time I have to go through a process of contacting 3 distributors to see who has stock of what g*d-awful models this week. **EVERY TIME**. If I'm really lucky one of them will have something halfway to acceptable somwhere in the country, then I'll have to wait two days (or three if I order after 3:00 pm) for the thing to arrive.

And the model: will have a VGA port, a 1366x768 15.6" screen, a 5,400 rpm hard drive, and a DVD. I have no idea where all these high-spec ultra-high-res machines are that the article talks of, but unless you are talking Apple prices we aren't really seeing them.

See Alistair Dabb's article elsewhere on El Reg for "what not to look out for in 2016" - this article is basically exactly that. Stuff we won't see this year, irrespective of Dell's marketing department's opinion.

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Google, didn't you get the memo? Stop trying to make Google+ happen

ChrisBedford

Re: They did their dash with me

Because things like YouTube, Gmail, Google Docs and Google Voice have been so transient? There are plenty of Google Services that have suck around.

YouTube is only a Google service because The Evil Empire bought it out as a going concern - it was highly successful long before Google got involved. Also note they have carefully not altered the branding in any way...

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The monitor didn't work but the problem was between the user's ears

ChrisBedford

Re: Running 24/7

operators would 'speed up' disk swaps by opening the enclosure before the disk had stopped spinning and use their hand to stop the disk.

Classic design flaw. The creators of the machine couldn't conceive of anyone being so stupid, so they didn't integrate some sort of interlock to prevent this kind of abuse, but anyone who designs something like this today deserves a solid smack to the side of the head. And that includes USB hard drives that can be (and often are) unplugged before the last write is complete.

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ChrisBedford

Re: Old IT joke

Turns out, this vendor (not mentioning any names: Compaq) distributes ALL their power supplies the same way, with the voltage switch set to 110v regardless of destination country. They forgot to tell us about it, didn't have any warning labels on it, so it took two techs to kill two supplies.

Which is presumably why, decades later, power supplies tend to be universal now. Eventuallly the feedback got through to the factories? (I think you'll find "used to distribute" would be more accurate)

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Uber driver 'pulls handgun' on passenger

ChrisBedford

Re: red USA

The jury disagreed and acquitted the shooter of all charges.

The jury system, gotta love it (if you did it). Clearly this is a miscarriage of justice and the judge should have instructed the jury to find him guilty. You can't shoot in self-defence if you can't see a gun.

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Confirmed: How to stop Windows 10 forcing itself onto PCs – your essential guide

ChrisBedford

Exackly. In fact GWX Control Panel does precisely the registry hack, only you don't have to see the details (that's the first button) as well as optionally removing any W10 downloads that might have sneaked onto your computer while you weren't looking (second button). Plus, if you don't delete the download, you can always go back and run it again to *restore* the registry and therefore the GWX app, and go ahead with the W10 "up" grade.

You did read the instructions, right?

;-)

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YouTube’s 10 years of hits: Global recognition at last for Rick Astley

ChrisBedford

Re: OK, I'm shallow and sexist...

"NSFW"? Gosh we used to have a morning "exercise class" on TV every day while the kids were eating their Kornflakes, with two or more girls dressed exactly like this. And one extremely camp guy, who naturally (being the "male") was the one giving instructions.

And *NO-ONE* did the exercises. But everyone watched.

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Review: Star Wars: The Force Awakens offers a new hope for the franchise

ChrisBedford

Re: No, the core problem with episodes I-III was that they were badly written....

"- Jar-Jar--SO annoying--enough said

[etc]"

Those three movies were so full of plot holes they should all have been complete flops. But of course they weren't, because FANS, so analysing individual goofs like these is just a waste of effort.

I loved the first movie when it came out, and eagerly waited for each successive episode, with hugely increasing disappointment each time. I managed to sit through the whole of the last one without screaming in frustration - or falling asleep - only because I was grimly determined to see the whole thing out, but doubt I have the patience for yet another one - having waited over 10 years I can happily wait a few more months until this one is out on video.

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Tablet computer zoom error saw plane fly 13 hours with 46cm hole

ChrisBedford

Re: Uhm, isn't the sarcasm sign always on, on this site?

"Hmm, do the Brits know what duck-tape is?"

I have yet to learn how to indent a quote like Vic so elegantly does it.

At the risk of being too pedantic about your otherwise entertaining post [Ahem] no I doubt The Brits (or anyone else) knows what duck tape is. What part of the duck is it made from, what's it used for, and where do you buy it? What colour is it, plain white like a regular duck or does it have black and green patches like a mallard or perhaps an Egyptian goose?

We have something much more useful though. It's called gaffer tape and they use it in the film industry to hold everything together. In fact there's a saying that everything in the world can be fixed using either gaffer tape or WD40 - if it moves and shouldn't, tape it; if doesn't move and should, spray it.

Or were you - w-a-a-a-a-a-a-i-i-i-t a m-i-n-u-u-u-u-u-t-e - were you referring to "duct" tape? Oh, same thing as gaffer tape. Yes, The Brits have heard of that.

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ChrisBedford

Re: Goooooooo Bill

"If a car had a fault such that visibility was impeded or the brakes didn't apply quickly enough then the manufacturer shares some of the blame for any accident that those flaws contributed to."

OK well I guess that's the American philosophy, i.e. "It can't be my fault, someone else must take the blame". The last hammer I bought has a fault: there is no safety mechanism to prevent you from hitting your own thumb with it, ergo the company that made it shares some of the blame for my injury.

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Australia's smut-shocked senators seek net censorship (again)

ChrisBedford

Re: Citations

"Just because it might be unpleasant for some doesn't mean that it is not true or well founded."

I think you've missed the point, which is that it is a parent's job to ensure children are exposed only to what's good for them - I very much doubt anyone disputes that porn at too young an age does not fall into that category.

It should never be the government's or an ISP's job to implement censorship, because that is too general an approach, except in cases of extreme material that consensus has agreed is bad all round, like kiddie pr0n or live beheadings.

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'Dear Daddy...' Max Zuckerberg’s Letter back to her Father

ChrisBedford

Re: Awesome

Interesting that I haven't seen anyone attacking Zuck on that amazingly self-serving (OK, the whole letter is self-serving, but, you know) part where he gives Facebook access to everyone and eliminates poverty in the same breath.

Actually, that's kinda breathtaking in its own conceited, pompous way.

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Dad who shot 'snooping vid drone' out of the sky is cleared of charges

ChrisBedford

Re: @Robert Helpmann??

"That just doesn't happen in the UK, because there's generally little possibility of a serious escalation in violence" - yeah, because the PEOPLE in the UK are different. Not solely because they don't have firearms!

When told they couldn't have guns, the English public went, "yeah, ok". When told you MIGHT have to register your guns, the American public raised an outcry. Differenty mentality, mate.

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ChrisBedford

Re: @Robert Helpmann??

"The simple fact is that having less guns lying around would certainly solve the issue"

Sure. But who says having anti-gun laws means there are less guns lying around? It's an often-quoted maxim, but true for all that, that when you outlaw guns only outlaws have guns. The charmingly quaint but nevertheless naive view that banning firearms leads to lowered firearm violence, assumes that owners of illegal weapons would turn their guns in. It doesn't take much analysis to realise that of course they won't. Which is of course what you said in your second sentence. But the point it too many people think that new laws are the answer to society's ills; they aren't, proper enforcement of existing laws often helps, but more often you have to change society's mindset.

And that doesn't happen overnight.

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ChrisBedford

[quot]""Oh. no I wouldn't because we're generally not allowed access to firearms in the u.k.""

Be glad - it's also why we dont have high levels of gun crime, lots of children shooting each other and daily mass murders...[/quot]

Do you really believe that? Guns cause crime? Not stupidity, gung-ho frontier mentality, alcohol, and lack of education or awareness?

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Ye Bug List

ChrisBedford

Re: The subject line of El Reg's daily email (er maybe this wasn't the right forum for this?)

Looks like the 'b' may drop in to replace an em-dash and the rest of the line it belongs to. Interesting, I suppose, if you're into that sort of thing.

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ChrisBedford

The subject line of El Reg's daily email

Every now and again, the header of my daily list of links will be chopped short at some random position and have a lower case "b" appended.

Does anyone else see this? Is it Outlook 2007 that's (mis)interpreting something unexpected in the mail? Have I duplicate-posted a bug that's been reported before? (I searched; did not find).

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Cunning goldfish avoided predator in tank for seven years

ChrisBedford
FAIL

I call BS

...on the last paragraph, "The Canadian province of Alberta has almost declared the critters an invasive species as so many of them seem to have survived being flushed down the lavatory and currently infest the region's storm drains"

1. Fact check: lavatories aren't connected to storm drains. If they were, every river would be an open sewer, and imagine what river mouths would look like.

2. If that last statement was supposed to read "...infest the regions sewers" that's even more unbelievable because the only things that can survive in a sewer is bacteria. Goldfish may be tough, but there's NO WAY they are going to survive in raw sewage.

3. Sewers (and storm drains) are not closed, static systems - they lead somewhere: rivers (and the sea, eventually) in one case and treatment plants in the other. Goldfish can't survive in salt water, either, and (depending on the treatment process) I doubt it's likely the sewerage farm will do them any good.

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ChrisBedford

I call BS

...on the last paragraph, "The Canadian province of Alberta has almost declared the critters an invasive species as so many of them seem to have survived being flushed down the lavatory and currently infest the region's storm drains"

1. Fact check: lavatories aren't connected to storm drains. If they were, every river would be an open sewer, and imagine what river mouths would look like.

2. If that last statement was supposed to read "...infest the regions sewers" that's even more unbelievable because the only things that can survive in a sewer is bacteria. Goldfish may be tough, but there's NO WAY they are going to survive in raw sewage.

3. Sewers (and storm drains) are not closed, static systems - they lead somewhere: rivers (and the sea, eventually) in one case and treatment plants in the other. Goldfish can't survive in salt water, either, and (depending on the treatment process) I doubt it's likely the sewerage farm will do them any good.

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Wake up, sheeple! If you ask Siri about 9/11 it will rat you out to the police!

ChrisBedford
Joke

Re: Which is why

"we like our feet and inches just the way they are"

I half expected you so to say "just the way God intended"

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This whopping 16-bit computer processor is being built by hand, transistor by transistor

ChrisBedford

Re: Beat the clock

"It's only 14m long. Assuming 0.7c because of the dielectric of the wires that would be 66.6ns propagation delay end-end. So you could run it under 15MHz, say 1MHz should be do-able"

Yeaaahhhh... I only know a tiny little bit about RF, so I might be talking complete rubbish here, but wouldn't there be radiation issues? I seem to remember that one of the constraints on the original IBM PC (4.77 MHz) was that pushing the clock any higher led to disproportionately high energy losses to radiation (and of course interference with your transistor radio!), and that on a printed circuit board of much less than 2 sq ft. I imagine that a 14m long assembly with lots of interconnecting cable and hand-soldered assemblies might have a slightly worse problem with that.

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Guy puts 1990s MacOS 7 on an Apple Watch – without jailbreaking it

ChrisBedford

"Of course. I remember at the time remarking how it was lucky the aliens' ships were Mac compatible when most hardware you could buy in Dixons at the time, wasn't."

Indeed. One of the two glaring plot holes in that movie -- the other that (at that time) it was 'known' that Macs were not susceptible to any significant viruses.

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Unlucky, Palmer: Facebook's going to BAN Oculus pr0n apps

ChrisBedford

Re: Was there pr0n on

"It was porn that won the war for VHS against BETA."

It was? And there was I thinking it was all about Sony not allowing 3rd party manufacturing to the Beta specs, while VHS was an open standard.

Can someone PLEASE reveal the secret to putting text into italics, bold, or blockquote in this forum? I've tried <q> [q] <quote> [quote] <blockquote> and [blockquote] all to no avail.

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What an eyeful: Apple's cut price 27in iMac with Retina Display

ChrisBedford

"I'm surprised MS with its "Let's get our software on as many devices as possible" mantra hasn't planned to bring out a version of Windows 10 that will install straight on a Mac with no need for OSX to be installed."

Eh wot?

You've been able to do that since... oh, I dunno, maybe 2007? Probably when Macs began to be based on Intel processors? I remember setting up a Mac Mini with WinXP at least 5 years ago, and it was an old Mac. It's not about Windows, but the computer's BIOS.

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For its next trick, Microsoft diminishes the iPad with just a driver

ChrisBedford

Re: Chicken WLTM egg

"When the device has lots of users, we'll target it"

Yeah. Users are waiting for you to target the device before they buy it. Like you said, chicken & egg, and someone has to stick their neck out to get the ball rolling (to mix a third metaphor in there).

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Apple MacBook 2015: Twelve inches of slim and shiny fanboi joy

ChrisBedford

Re: True

"You do know that it's not 1999 anymore, right?"

Likewise an earlier comment about "IBM clones". I wonder when last IBM made PCs, much less any PC was referred to as a "clone".

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ChrisBedford

Re: I think the idea..

"the only people who will buy this will be light users"

Sheez at £ 1,100+ they'd be pretty well-heeled light users, then.

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VOTERS! This Election: Vote #Smart, Vote #Digital

ChrisBedford

Re: OK, read the article

Yeah, same here

I at least have the excuse that I live in South Africa and the column was (apparently) deeply rooted in Brit pop culture. But I normally can at least understand the gist of El Reg articles, whereas this is just... complete gobbledegook.

Except for that reference to Russell Brand being the shadow Chancellor, I thought that was mildly amusing.

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Pi based kid-nerdifier Kano buried under freak cash avalanche

ChrisBedford

Re: Radionics`- Phillips

Philips badge-engineered just about everything they sold for decades. It would astonish me if they weren't still doing it.

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What's Meg Whitman fussing over: The fate of HP ... or the font on a DISRUPTIVE new logo?

ChrisBedford

Re: "stuck together"?

"crossbars"? There's a typographic term for those, too

Umm, yeah, maybe, but it isn't "serif". You linked to an article explaining all about serifs which you didn't actually read?

A serif is not a substantive part of the letter. It's a decoration added at one of the points of the letter. If you left off the "crossbars" of the letter "t" it wouldn't actually be a "t" any more.

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ChrisBedford

Re: thanks for that link

communal synergized cross-platform paradigm enabling entrepreneurial client focused solutions providing win-win value creation for cross-value chain stakeholders

Still laughing. Many times in my career I have been told that to make more money I have to move into business analysis - but since it comes down to being able to talk like this with a straight face that option is not open to me!

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Top Spanish minister shows citizens are thick as tortillas de ballenas

ChrisBedford

Re: Pedanting...

surveys that treat people like idiots can provoke rebellious answers. And when some surveys have trick questions[...]

Indeed. We also don't know if the results were cherry-picked to make the out come better (or worse) - I have seen some (YouTube, I guess) video "survey" answers to questions asked of American's on the streets, that made them look like utter idiots (insert obvious jibe here) but I have also seen the exact opposite: people stopped on the street who have given intelligent, informed, articulate answers. Depends who you ask, and how you ask it, and how (or if) you use the answers.

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ChrisBedford

They are no thicker than Americans, they have identical results 25% believe the sun orbits the earth

And the earth orbits Amurrica.

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ChrisBedford

Re: Not necessarily thick...

Considering how widespread internet access is these days there is not much excuse for not self-educating.

What! The Internet that is full of inaccuracies, lies, far-right conspiracy theory websites, far-left conspiracy theory websites, bigots, rubbish e-mails, IS Jihadists, and downright loonies? That Internet? You really think it's a good place for a higgerant ill-eddicated backwoodsman to learn stuff?

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ChrisBedford

Re: You need to see the questions for context

I think everyone gets that time machines aren't involved, or the probability of them being involved is infinitesimally small.

Actually I don't think everyone gets it at all. OK not the time machine part, but that was facetiousness on your part, yeah?

*PLENTY* of people (the creationist right-wing, I mean) think the theory of evolution means humans descended from chimpanzees, and no amount of talking sense to them is going to shake that belief.

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