* Posts by TheOtherHobbes

1079 posts • joined 15 Feb 2012

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Germany to fork out BEELLLIONS for farmers' broadband

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: 50 Meg Everywhere, eh?

>Far better to believe Germany to be a paragon of everything organised and clever, talk ourselves down, and take comfort from our treasured national collection of war jokes.

See also, "austerity."

Anyone with a brain should be able to understand that fast broadband would be a Very Good Thing for UK PLC.

But the current crop of saddos would rather build train sets and play Monopoly with real property.

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The most tragic thing about the Ashley Madison hack? It was really 1% actual women

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: No Dick Left Behind Act of 2015

Or those 12,000 women were really, really busy.

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Angry Birds maker Rovio takes aim at staff, axes a third of them

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Greed to put it simply ....

You don't need to worry until they announce they're working on a self-driving car.

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Prof Hawking cracks riddle of black holes – which may be portals to other universes

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Have you ever lost anything you wanted back

You don't need to worry until you find a copy of Windows 9, the next One Direction CD, some Chinese property bonds, and a towel.

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Ex-HP top aide in the clink for racking up $1m on company credit cards

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Spending limit

I'd have tried to buy America.

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Net neutrality: How to spot an arts graduate in a tech debate

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: "How you spot an arts graduate in a tech debate"

>They're serving the coffee.

Actually they're probably running the political system or lying to you while pretending to be journalists.

There's a reason politics is full of lawyers and has almost no engineers in it - it's because too many engineers and developers are shockingly easy to mislead, misdirect, scam, exploit, and manipulate.

As far as the humanities grads are concerned, knowing how to code or put together a network doesn't make you a master of the universe - it makes you the help.

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TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Poor analogy

Indeed. Claiming that net neutrality is the creation of twinkie know-nothing lawyers is pure FUD.

The problem isn't traffic management. It means things like:

The prospect of selective surcharges for certain kinds of content

(Want to host video or audio? Pay the networks extra or they won't let your customers see it.)

Creating selective bandwidth caps for some content providers but not for others

Setting up walled-gardens with limited or nonexistent outside access

It basically means breaking everything that makes the Internet so useful, and providing favourable treatment for large corporates at the expense of start-ups and individual content providers.

Twinkie lawyers have nothing to do with it. Twinkie psychotic bean counters and corporate predators are much more the problem.

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Microsoft will explain only 'significant' Windows 10 updates

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: GIMP is, or at least has been enough of a match for most of what PhotoShop did

Most Autodesk products run just fine on Linux. The standout exception is 3DS Max.

The big winner from the Win 10 fiasco will be Apple. The Typical Windows User has no idea Linux exists, and Office/CS/Autodesk are all available on OS X.

Linux basically does no advertising, so people only learn about it from people who already know about it.

Win 10 will be left with a rump of exceptionally clueless users, and those who have to use it for business reasons.

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'Unexpected item in baggage area' assigned to rubbish area

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Come on, don't be coy,

In fact the real Dabbsy was away for brain scanning so he could be replaced by an auto-innuendo-bot.

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IT jargon is absolutely REAMED with sexual double-entendres

TheOtherHobbes
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And nibbles. And hard drives. And lookup tables. And private keys. And thunderbolt connectors. And sockets. And Tumblr. And Pinterest. And OS X. (Bit subtle there.*)

IT jargon is sex for people who never have sex.

[*] I know it's supposed to be "ten". But how many people know that?

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Skills crisis? Not for long: More and more UK kids gain STEM quals

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Yes but no but...

A lot of physics PhDs end up as quants, because the money is so good.

This is everyone's loss, because they're basically paid to find ways to fix the global casino known as "the markets".

If they were doing something useful, like working on interplanetary propulsion or even better clean energy, we'd have colonies on the Moon and Mars, an asteroid mining operation, and a ship halfway to Alpha Centauri by now.

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TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Good.

And yet PPEs, lawyers, and economists often learn a lot more than physicists do.

The problem is that STEM doesn't teach you anything about politics.

Anyone who thinks facts or evidence can sway an argument on their own is dead meat against a PPE, lawyer, economist, or the worst kind of journalist.

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Two weeks of Windows 10: Just how is Microsoft doing?

TheOtherHobbes
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I'll wait until Microsoft grows up and starts producing a polished and professional OS.

I have no idea wtf Win 10 is supposed to be, but it's clearly not that.

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It's 2015, and someone can pwn Windows PCs by inserting a USB stick

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Bugs in Edge? Really?

>It defies belief that a "brand new" browser, aka Edge, has so many flaws

No. It really doesn't.

Meanwhile at Hobbes Towers we've just discovered that Wurd 2013 on Win 8/10 uses the same rendering engine as IE11, which means text looks like jagged crap.

MS took out a feature that worked in Win 7 and replaced it with crap code that everyone who uses Wurd has to look at every day.

That's how awesome MS is.

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W is for WTF: Google CEO quits, new biz Alphabet takes over

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Wonder why they waited this long

The ad farm stuff has a limited shelf life. World + Dog is turning on ad blocking software, and measurable ROI is dropping.

It may never drop to zero, but the world of SEO and CPI is past its best days.

I don't think this is ad + skunkworks so much as ad + new thing + new thing + new thing...

When you're a billionaire you can throw cash at researching stuff because it's fun, not because you're desperate for a fast return.

Investors will take a while to catch on, as usual.

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Oracle waves fist, claims even new Android devices infringe its Java copyrights

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Java question...

It would be highly entertaining if Android moved to Swift.

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Moronic Time cover sets back virtual reality another 12 months

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Bracing

Well spotted. Shame they left out the starfish.

Skegness

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All hail Ikabai-Sital! Destroyer of worlds and mender of toilets

TheOtherHobbes
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I discovered recently the overflow from the cistern in the new house overflows under the bath.

Onto the chipboard floor.

And wasn't that a happy surprise, boys and girls.

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Virtually no one is using Apple Music even though it is utterly free

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: I don't really care about music...

Apple is where Microsoft was about ten years ago - lots of brand momentum covering an increasingly empty shell.

Cook needs to move on. He's brilliant at detail and logistics, but clueless about innovation, consumer satisfaction, and software project management. Software quality has fallen off a cliff on his watch.

The markets have been giving Apple stock a good kicking. Another six months of that and Cook's job will be on the line.

The problem is Jobs was a one-off. There's literally no one at Apple - or elsewhere - with the same insight into consumer psychology.

I can't imagine Jobs would have signed up Beats, failed so badly with Watch and Music, or missed the new markets Apple could have moved into and owned by now.

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Bitcoin can't be owned, says Japanese court, as Karpeles sweats in cell

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Japanese banks are going to be so happy !

Aaaaaand... it's gone.

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Sengled lightbulb speakers: The best worst stereo on Earth

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: The Internet of Things summarised

>1. Take two items never designed to go together; the more idiotic the combination, the better. The level of naivety displayed must be staggering.

Also works for reality TV shows.

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Linus Torvalds warns he's in no mood to be polite as Linux 4.2 drags

TheOtherHobbes
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>more intelligent computer users

Are they like more intelligent bosses?

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Windows 10: Buy cheap, buy twice, right? Buy FREE ... buy FOREVER

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Free you say?

Everyone seems to be forgetting that Win10 is free for now.

A year from now when it's a bit less buggy, but still equally crap, you'll be expected to start paying for it.

Based on Office 365, I'd guess the asking price is going to be something like a fiver a month. And it's going to be hard to pirate - assuming anyone will want to - because the payment authentication will be tied to your MS account.

This would be a genius plan if Win10 was a thing of beauty. But it's not - it's a pile of elephant crap whose main USP is that it's not as bad as Win 8, which was the worst and most hated modern OS ever.

And the spyware features aren't going to sit well with corporates.

So... mass stampede to Linux and OS X. Penguin boys, your time may finally have come.

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TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Kudos for the 1970's music reference

>I will be passing the Beats device onto a grandchild very soon.

Pardon?

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Mobiles? What are they? Nokia immerses itself in virtual reality cameras

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Security applications

The antigravity device to keep it hovering will be in the 2020 model, at a guess.

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'Fix these Windows 10 Horrors': Readers turn their guns on Redmond

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: No Control of Updating

>The word is PREMISES.

It used to be "on-site" until the illiterate marketing types got their brains on it.

Unless "on premise" is some kind of failed ninja NLP attempt to subvert everyone's thinking in an holistic synergised brand-ward direction.

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UK.gov wants to stop teenagers looking at tits online. No, really

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Fix society

>consideration for others

Not from this lot. You want the other lot for that.

I think tits are a national danger. We should all be terrified of free-range tit access for our teens. Their minds will be warped into perversion forever by hordes of terrifying nipples invading screens all over the UK.

And that's just the start. Tits are the gateway drug to other body parts.

Before you know it they'll be snorting coke off prostitutes and - oh, wait, that's what happens to Lords, not teenagers.

Got a little confused there. My mistake.

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And on that bombshell: Top Gear's Clarkson to reappear on Amazon

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Oh well, at least you get to watch some fun TV whilst waiting for a delivery...

IME Prime stuff always costs more than normal stuff. So you're paying twice for the allegedly free next day service.

I'd use Prime Video more if it worked on Chrome on my Mac without stuttering, and without trying to force Flash updates in Safari every time I use it, even though I've tried to turn them off.

As for Clarkson - whatevs.

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Edge out rivals? No! Firefox boss BLASTS Microsoft's Windows 10 browser brouhaha

TheOtherHobbes
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And there's more!

Seems Windows uses some torrenty P2P thing to distribute itself to other PCs, and to download updates from other PCs.

What could possibly go wrong?

Windows 10 Uses Your Bandwidth

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BONK! BONK! Windows 10 whack-a-mole – Microsoft still fixing bugs

TheOtherHobbes
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[ob] But can it run Crysis? [/ob]

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Hurrah! Windfarms produce whopping ONE PER CENT of EU energy

TheOtherHobbes
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>The problem is, wind energy is not reliable.

No, that's story-telling and hand waving about a topic you clearly don't understand. It's like complaining that high-level languages can't possibly work because compilers just aren't clever enough to output clean code.

Firstly, offshore really isn't that intermittent. Secondly on-shore isn't built where your semi is in the middle of the city. It's built in - you know - areas where the wind blows. Because building it where your semi is would be really stupid.

Clever people do a lot of modelling and statistical estimation of potential sites, and bankers won't fund projects if the numbers don't work out,

Because the numbers are conservative - those bankers have their uses - wind reliably outperforms the estimates.

Finally, we have this thing called a National Grid, which means - here comes the clever part - that it's possible to move electricity from where it's generated to where it's needed.

Now, as for energy generation - there's been relentless hostility to renewables from the fossil dinosaurs for decades now. They really, really hate the fact that they're not going to able to keep holding everyone to ransom with fossils. (If you think wind is unreliable, why not rely on Russian gas instead? Genius...) So offshore wind build out is some tiny percentage of what it could be.

In spite of this - more than 8% across the EU. That's an incredible achievement, and well above most predictions.

And longer term - do you think we should burn oil to keep warm, or should we keep it for useful things, like plastics?

Elon Musk is betting the farm on electric travel being the future, and if he had to go brain to brain against Lewis Page in an IQ battle, I know who I'd be betting on.

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Today's smart home devices are too dumb to succeed

TheOtherHobbes
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>You'd need a proper, fully functional and self-aware AI integrated with everything happening in the house

Yes indeed - that's when the IOT stuff will finally become useful. Should be around 2035, at a guess.

The current app fad is a passing phase. It's not until you can start talking to the house AI and have it understand what you mean - with optional fine control from a tablet that displays the controls you need automatically - that automation is going to start living up to its potential.

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HP slaps dress code on R&D geeks: Bin that T-shirt, put on this tie

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Tidy Desk

>your desk is a 'Horizontal Filing System'

You mean "Horizontal Business Logic Synergy Incubator", surely?

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YOU! DEGRASSE! It's time to make Pluto a proper planet again, says NASA boffin

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Nomen est omen

Perhaps we should reclassify Pluto as a fruit?

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SCORCHIO! This JUNE was the SIXTY-SIXTH HOTTEST on record

TheOtherHobbes
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I think most people here have worked out that if you want an expert opinion on climate science, trying to get it from a bomb disposal expert is like asking a camel for synchronised swimming lessons.

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Microsoft: Hey, you. Done patching Windows this month? WRONG

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Jeez

But when will the NadellaBot be fixed?

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Russian billionaire: GET me the ALIENS ON THE PHONE. Do it NOW

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Intelligent alien life?

I think it's more likely we'll find intelligent phones made of bacteria, laughing at our puny inorganic technology.

Cell phone?

Okay. Fine. Never mind.

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Ant-Man: Big ideas, small payoff

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Personally...

>Angst is always internal, anon!

Haven't you see the DC Angst Man[tm] comics?

Angst Man vs Dr Žižek is really intense.

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Happy NukeDay to you! 70 years in the shadow of the bomb post-Trinity

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Bombing Japan

The Japanese had been hinting about surrender since January and talking seriously about it since May.

The Emperor had already given up by then. Some of the military were still in it, but not all of them

The only sticking points were the exact terms - they didn't want anything that looked unconditional, and they wanted an assurance the Emperor's dignity (such as it was) would be protected.

Discussions were proceeding via the Soviets, who were happy to drag their heels, but the USA had already cracked Japan's diplomatic encryption codes so everyone knew the state of play.

The usual excuse of preventing the high costs of a land invasion is nonsense. Japan's islands would have been blockaded, and it's almost certain the Japanese would have surrendered by the end of the year at the very latest - most probably by October.

It's more likely the two weapons were dropped to discourage Soviet interest in Japan or Western Europe, and to see what the weapons did in action.

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BT circles wagons round Openreach as Ofcom mulls forced split-up

TheOtherHobbes
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>Whatever you might think about connection speeds they are clearly very fit for purpose.

if that purpose is to make profits for BT, then certainly.

If it's to provide world-class broadband to the entire UK - you're havin' a larf, aincha?

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FireEye intern nailed in Darkode downfall was VXer, say the Feds

TheOtherHobbes
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Wouldn't outsource to China? Er...

"...one of the dumbest security moves possible"

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Everything I see is Windows 10, says Microsoft's SatNad

TheOtherHobbes
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Go Nad!

Oh - wait...

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Pluto Pic: Is it a DOG? Is it a HEART? Or is it ... is it ... BIGFOOT?

TheOtherHobbes
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OMG - it's Donald Trump!

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Google makes new hires ONE pay offer. 'Negotiation'? What's that?

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: Not a very good long term strategy

I don't think they're getting the best people already. There are plenty of famous greybeards there now, which gives them some CS credibility, but it's obvious the software quality of Google products has been dropping steadily and they've had a lot of bad misses in the new product market.

Chrome started out as a sleek, fast browser. Now it's a bloated memory-eating mess with obvious bugs.

Clearly, something has gone badly wrong there.

I expect there's cool stuff happening in R&D, especially in AI. But the basic ad-selling model is only going to be viable for another decade or so. Unless there's some major change of direction, Google is going to die with it.

The best people seem to be less and less whelmed by the Google way, and are doing their own thing elsewhere.

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Mathematician: SUNSPOT DROUGHT will mean mini ICE AGE from 2030

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: This good be good news or bad news.....

> nuclear which is cleaner, has plentiful fuel and doesn't result in us protecting the Saudi royal family from those they oppress.

Nuclear also has the advantage that it reliably makes towns and cities uninhabitable. So there won't be much fossil fuel use happening there.

What's that Sooty? You say "But those were accidents"?

Yes. Yes they were. In an industry well known for having a creative and lateral approach to safety, very nasty accidents do happen - which is a complete surprise to everyone. But there it is.

I guess we still have to work out what to do with all the waste. But if it's cold enough, we can just freeze it at the bottom of a rusty pool for a decade or two and let the next generation deal with it.

A bit like we're doing now, in fact.

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WHAT ARE the 'WEIRD' SPOTS seen on far-flung PLUTO?

TheOtherHobbes
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If you read the dots as binary you get a location close to Alpha Centauri.

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What do you MEAN, 'Click on the thing which looks like a Mondrian?'

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: You Think You've Got It Bad?

All software should have a spin dryer and a Poldark.

It should definitely be a thing.

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Apple's iOS 9 public beta lands: El Reg pops it on a slab, strokes it up

TheOtherHobbes
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Not that closely.

Helvetica is a classic font. San Francisco is an ugly piece of crap, IMO.

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The END of WINDOWS EVERYWHERE! Is that really what Nadella wants?

TheOtherHobbes
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>So everything that MS has done after Windows 7 has been a waste of time.

Win 8 - pointless.

Win 10 - pointless.

Purchase and trashing of Nokia - pointless.

WP - not quite pointless, but a footnote also-ran in the phone market.

Surface - mostly pointless.

Office on iOS - not pointless, but proves MS have lost control of the platform.

It's one hell of a record.

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Microsoft SLASHES 7,800 bods, BURNS $7.6bn off books in Nokia adjustment

TheOtherHobbes
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Re: I'm starting to lose track of this

>I couldn't say, but an announcement like this sounds like the death knell for WIndows Phone.

I predict:

1. MS fires all former Nokia staffers

2. Nokia rehires some of them and starts selling phones again.

3. MS buys Blackberry and tries to put WP10-Enterprise-Plus-Server-Off-Premise-Edition-Pro on Blackberry hardware.

4. Nadella is replaced by Cortana.

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