* Posts by Euripides Pants

964 publicly visible posts • joined 11 Feb 2012

Watch BLUBBERING BILLION-DOLLAR BALLMER: Microsoft goodbye love-gush leaks

Euripides Pants

Re: Surely the reality distortion field mainly works on customers.

Sales figures for the Surface say otherwise.

Euripides Pants
Coat

Re: Glow sticks

It's a Freudian thing....

Euripides Pants
Windows

Re: The scary thing is that he might actually believe it

Not scary, funny...

ZERO-G DINOSAUR made from bits and bobs by space station flight engineer

Euripides Pants

Re: BEST MUM EVER

Yeah, the rest of us have to take our kids to Yellowstone. They're bored until they realize that their parents took them camping inside a giant volcano.

Euripides Pants

Re: Beware of reapers ...

Don't fear the Reaper

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRYABA0saFw

Our magnificent Vulture 2 spaceplane: Intimate snaps

Euripides Pants

Re: addition of gloss

"C'mon, it's GOT to be red."

Black, like the SR71

30 years on: The day a computer glitch nearly caused World War III

Euripides Pants

Re: Don't fret

"given two wrong extremes, the best position to take would be somewhere between them"

No, the best position would be 90 degrees away from both of them and as far away as you can possibly go.

BOOGIE BALLMER: Steve Dirty Dances at tearful Microsoft leaving do

Euripides Pants
Gimp

Re: "We love you, Steve!"

quite the Reality Distortion Field...

Is this the silicon chip KILLER? Boffins boot up carbon-nanotube CPU

Euripides Pants
Coat

Re: They really need a different three letter acronym ...

Yeah, sooner or later someone will call the thing a CNT-pooter...

Bill Gates: Yes, Ctrl-Alt-Del salute was a MISTAKE

Euripides Pants

Re: Confused - it's a security thang

"From what very little I understand, I don't see why it was not adopted by linux."

Probably because it would be "F#CK!NG POINTLESS" according to Linus T.

Amazon Kindle Fire HDX: Bezos dives into tech-support MONEY PIT

Euripides Pants

Re: I thought Amazon

"Can they see me ;-)?"

The NSA already has.

Microsoft SLASHES rewards for biz selling its kit to 100 'big fish'

Euripides Pants
Windows

Re: losses in the tablet market

It's a bit less profound that you think, just a Ballmeroid flareup...

LinkedIn fires back against 'hack-and-spam' US class-action sue bomb

Euripides Pants
FAIL

Ridiculous corporate officer title

Any business that needs a "senior director of litigation" is doing something wrong...

Microsoft: Surface a failure? No, it made us STRONGER

Euripides Pants
Windows

Re: "superior hardware-software integration"?

"What about USER-software integration?"

I would not like to be integrated with Microsoft software. See what happened to this woman --->

TPG flashes cheeky 'down under' CAPTCHA

Euripides Pants

Re: parliament

It's pronounced "congress" on the left side of the Atlantic...

Psst.. Wanna Android all-in-one PC? We have the chip tech, says Intel

Euripides Pants
Windows

Re: Raspberry Pi

"Microsoft will start Pooping themselves real soon now!!!"

Given all the U-turns we've seen since the launch of W8/RT/Surface, I think MS is in full BM mode already.

Flying in the US? Remember to leave your hand grenades at home

Euripides Pants

Re: "Dual Purpose Grenades"

"Warfare and fishing"

No, we use plain old dynamite for fishing - it's cheaper.

Euripides Pants
Go

Re: WTF

"I'm pretty sure the US military hand them out to their personnel when they get to the war"

You are mistaken, here in the USA soldiers have to provide their own hand grenades. Given that they are stocked in all convenience stores right next to the beer this is not a big issue.

IETF floats plan to PRISM-proof the Internet

Euripides Pants
Thumb Up

Re: All your security measures are belong to US

groan.....

That was a truly awful pun, have an upvote.

Microsoft does a U-turn, releases Windows 8.1 to developers early after all

Euripides Pants
Devil

Re: teeth

"my teeth are good enough that I don't need any work"

Dentures, eh...

Shop-a-suspect web security system: 'We've helped cops nab 100 suspects'

Euripides Pants
FAIL

A private company "facilitaitng" police investigations...

Does anyone else think this is as ill-conceived as letting the fire department work on commission?

400 million Chinese people can't speak Chinese: Official

Euripides Pants

Re: So how does this compare...

me no unnerstan

Vulture 2 autopilot reports for duty

Euripides Pants

Re: Reprogramming

"Methinks somebody forgot the tinfoil hat"

Nay, the tinfoil was wrapped securely 'round the turnip lodged firmly in the skull...

Crack open those wallets: Microsoft is raising software prices AGAIN

Euripides Pants
WTF?

"encourage people to move to PAAS"

Why would people want to move to Easter Egg coloring kits?

http://www.paaseastereggs.com/

Forget Mars: Let's get someone on the Moon – NASA veteran

Euripides Pants
Coat

Re: screw the aliens

Remember to wear a condom, Space Clap is nasty...

Xbox One launch date REVEALED - and it's on the 360's birthday

Euripides Pants

"Who's going to be a brave early adoptor ?"

Eadon

Canadian comet impact fingered for triggering prehistoric climate shift

Euripides Pants
Trollface

Re: Because no on likes Americans...

We Americans most definitely do *not* get up anyone's nose as we don't know where your noses have been.

TDK calls it quits on tape media thanks to 'difficult environment'

Euripides Pants
Unhappy

Re: Haven't used a tape in ? years

Some things are only available on tape like _real_ Doctor Who (Tom Baker) episodes. Can't find Terror of the Zygons or the E-Space trilogy on anything but VHS in the States.

Researcher bags $12,500 after showing how to hack Zuck's pics

Euripides Pants
Go

Re: Getting their attention.

Nah, the way to REALLY get Facebook's attention would have been to delete ALL photos from Facebook.

Behind the candelabra: Power cut sends Britain’s boxes back to the '70s

Euripides Pants
Thumb Down

Re: Not so much

Are you mad?! During power outages the damn things beep every few seconds!

Selfie twerks its way into the dictionary

Euripides Pants
Unhappy

Re: they don't speak English anyway

Me no unnerstand

Dopey dope-growing dope smoked out by own dope dope-growing vid

Euripides Pants
Joke

Re: Fucking insane country!

Yup, we're hoping it'll curb the illegal alien problem...

Thought the PC market couldn't get any worse? HAH! Think again

Euripides Pants

Re: Surely it's becoming apparent

"getting your home network up and running without a PC is a faff"

Yes. But, unfortunately for the merchants, any _old_ PC will do.

Boffins lay bare exotic Lara Croft meteorite element ununpentium

Euripides Pants
Boffin

"So the Americans will either be calling it 'ununpentum' or 'elerum' then?"

No, we will call it 'Gus'. Gus is a nice, friendly, easy to pronounce name.

Chinese authorities say massive DDoS attack took down .cn domain

Euripides Pants

Re: Can anyone here confirm this?

In other words, China disappeared from the internet and no one noticed.....

What Surface RT flop? Nokia said to be readying WinRT slab for September

Euripides Pants
Windows

Re: That picture looks rather photoshopped

Of course it's Photoshopped. How else are Technology Powerhouses like Nokia supposed to push vaporware?

United Nations to grill US over alleged NSA bugging of its HQ – report

Euripides Pants
Black Helicopters

"why many in the US are so paranoid"

We're not paranoid, we're right.

Yahoo! starts $1.99 'watch list' to recycle old usernames

Euripides Pants
Thumb Up

Re: 867-5309

Upvote for being able to remember the '80s.

All I remember from that decade is a waitress named Bambi.

Tesla tops $20bn as Elon Musk claims arm-wave design tech

Euripides Pants
Coat

I am not going to make an IM suit

Good. Why anyone would want an Instant Messaging suit is beyond me...

Botched court doc outs Google as respondent in national security flap

Euripides Pants
Facepalm

Re: As if both sides of American politics aren't as bad as each other.

In other words, they are like politicians everywhere...

Air mattress blast blows German man across room

Euripides Pants

Re: How do you become an expert in matress explosions?

Turpentine and a hair dryer.

Four ways the Guardian could have protected Snowden – by THE NSA

Euripides Pants

Re: Still entirely susceptible

Yup...

http://xkcd.com/538/

Guardian lets UK spooks trash 'Snowden files' PCs to make them feel better

Euripides Pants
Thumb Up

Re: Symbollocks

Hope that makes it into the OED!

Make or break: Microsoft sets date for CRUCIAL Win 8.1 launch

Euripides Pants
Coat

Re: Is it actually possible to polish a polished turd?

Maybe they're hoping the waxy buildup will be mistaken for improvement...

Osama Bin Pwned: Al Qaeda mocked in Twitter counter-jihad

Euripides Pants

Re: @Richard Jones 1 (was: Whatever. Show me the fucking "terrorists" already.)

"Giving a 6 yr old license to shoot small animals as they see fit would probably have your child taken in to protective care in any civilized country."

Tom, believe me, if you had gophers you'd shoot 'em too.

Larry Ellison: Google is ABSOLUTELY EVIL, but NSA is ESSENTIAL

Euripides Pants
Stop

Slow News Day

Douchebag likes the NSA.

Top execs off as Zynga's new CEO shaves 'layer' off senior ranks

Euripides Pants

Re: Chief People Officer

Nope, this is a new one. Hope it doesn't catch on...

Feds arrest rogue trucker after GPS jamming borks New Jersey airport test

Euripides Pants
Thumb Down

Re: The new battlefield...

Or what happens when some goob using a GPS jammer is driving next to you?