* Posts by thegrouch

58 posts • joined 7 Feb 2012

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Grace Hopper gave us COBOL, 'debugging' and inspiration. So Google gave her a Doodle

thegrouch

I hate to be a pedant, but with Microfocus COBOL you can start at Working Storage section and skip all that other stuff.

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Techno-thriller author and gaming franchise Tom Clancy dies at 66

thegrouch

Re: Of course....

Actually it was a Japanese pilot who crashed his plane into the White House in 'Debt of Honour', arguably the idea came from the Kamikaze pilots of WWII? Try 'Storming Heaven' by Dale Brown for more technothriller aircraft based acts of terror.

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NSA's Project Marina stores EVERYONE'S metadata for A YEAR

thegrouch
Mushroom

Last time I checked, your average US citizen was at far greater risk of being shot by a disgruntled employee/mentally unstable individual/aggrieved former partner/deluded student on a rampage. Although there is often an attempt to put an Islamic spin on these stories, the truth is that there are a lot of nuts with guns over there and rather less boogeymen on a jihad.

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Nissan promises to sell self-driving cars by 2020

thegrouch

I thought self driving lorries were already in use?

http://simpsons.wikia.com/wiki/Navitron_Autodrive_system

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Big blue Avatar movie spawns THREE SEQUELS

thegrouch

It's all about the money, money, money etc

Hollywood has found it's magic formula, gone are the days of decent films. It's all about the big, shiny 3D these days, lots of colour, explosions and more explosions. Just look at what's made money over the last few years. Would you call any of these true classics?

Avatar - $2.7bn

Titanic - $2.1bn

Transformers 3 - $1.1bn

Pirates of the Caribbean 3 (and 4) - $1bn

Alice in Wonderland - $1bn (how did this POS make this much?)

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Peter Capaldi named as 12th Doctor Who

thegrouch

Re: Good-Bye DW?

Get over it fangurl

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UK gov's smart meter dream unplugged: A 'colossal waste of cash'

thegrouch

I'm sure there's some kind of payback to the Treasury here. Just like the panic over petrol price hikes gave a boost to the VAT take last year, or the scam over child booster seats a few years back. There's got to be VAT on the cost of buying and installing these things, assuming independent contractors are farmed out to do it. Ker-ching Mr Chancellor!

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Spotify strikes back at Radiohead - but artists are still angry

thegrouch
Windows

I prefer Brahms and Lizst (hic)

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Make cool shows, make money: Netflix's SHOCKING TV strategy

thegrouch

Cancelled shows

I'd definately subscribe if they'd pick up some of the great shows which have been cancelled over the years. Pushing Daisies, Firefly and Deadwood to name a few. On and Futurama fans might like to know that the axe has fallen on it (again).

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Review: Renault Zoe electric car

thegrouch
Thumb Down

"All too obvious causes of climate change"? Yes, I suppose the pollution generated from power stations providing the electricity for this car would fall into that category. And the 'tough sh!t' rhetoric at the end of the article shows that the electric car still has a way to go before it can be a realistic alternative. Browbeating the reader isn't going to make this effort look any better.

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Uni profs: Kids today could do with a bit of 'mind-crippling' COBOL

thegrouch

Re: This cannot be serious

Yes, Nationwide have moved to SAP but all the development and testing was done by offshore resources as is the ongoing support. For those of us in the industry it can hardly have escaped anyone's knowledge that as many businesses as possible are seeking to cut costs through offshoring. I suspect COBOL is suffering less from this than newer languages.

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NASA probes spots temporary third Van Allen radiation belt

thegrouch

If a short trip was enough to ruin astronauts eyesight, what would a 501 day excursion to Mars do?

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Ready or not: Microsoft preps early delivery of IE10 for Windows 7

thegrouch

Re: Internet Explorer?

I tried Chrome after giving up on the indeterminably slow IE9 and found it wasn't much better. Plus it had spawned numerous processes in the background according to Task Manager. So I've gone for Firefox instead. So far, so good.

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Good news! UK IT jobs up. Bad news? They're with a bunch of bankers

thegrouch
Flame

You have to allow for the number of adverts which are just fishing exercises written by agents looking for CVs, these represent no job whatsoever. I'd lump recruitment agents in with bankers, estate agents and Justin Bieber as prime candidates for Soylent Green. That said, I'd rather have a Findus Lasagne.

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Netflix tempts binge viewers with House of Cards pilot freebie

thegrouch
Unhappy

Yes but...

...until I can get connected at something above 1.5Mbs then I'm forever denied these wonderful sounding streaming services.

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Motörheadphönes Motörizer rock 'phones review

thegrouch

How about a review of the in-ear models?

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Watchdog halts Toyota Grand Theft Auto-esque advert

thegrouch
Flame

Can I write to the ASA to ask that all the GoCompare and Compare the Market adverts are withdrawn? The rage they induce is certainly affecting my health.

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Star Wars VII: The Disney Movie signs Toy Story III script genius

thegrouch
FAIL

Re: @ AC

Thrawn Trilogy? I can live without Force repelling furry tree lizards thankyouverymuch.

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Man, 19, cuffed after burning Remembrance poppy pic is Facebooked

thegrouch

Re: Over the top

Little harsh to label teenage conscripts as 'Darwin award contenders' when they had no choice about their assignments to the trenches, nor anything approaching sensible orders when they got there. One week they're turning in the harvest, the next they're sitting in a shithole in France being shot at. Turning around to run away from the enemy guns got you shot by your superior officers for cowardice. They were led by dickheads playing with toy soldiers miles away, thinking they were still battling Frenchie at Waterloo. Whilst you might disagree with the motives for WW1, a little sympathy for the poor bastards who had to endure it wouldn't go amiss.

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BBC in secret trial to see if you care about thing you plainly don't

thegrouch
Facepalm

I have a DAB radio alarm clock tuned to Planet Rock. 50% of the time it wakes me up with the buzzer instead of the radio as it's failed to get a signal. Neither the clock nor the bit of wire out of the back is ever moved. In a moving vehicle I could understand it but my house hasn't budged an inch!

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Sysadmins: Basically a happy lot, but frustrated and underpaid

thegrouch

IT Crowd IS funny I'm afraid but certainly not accurate.

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How IT bosses turned the tables on our cushy consultancy gigs

thegrouch

Re: Get yourself into the security cleared jobs market...

Not for the lack of trying. Unfortunately advertised roles state that candidates must already have clearance. It's chicken and egg, I can't get a security cleared role because I don't already have it, but I won't get it unless someone is willing to take a chance and wait and that's a rare thing when start dates are invariably ASAP or by the end of the week. I also know you're not supposed to advertise roles which insist on SC candidates only but all agencies do it.

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Disney buys Lucasfilm, new Star Wars trilogy planned

thegrouch
Thumb Up

Frog throat bulge

I guess Lucas can now afford to have his throatbeard protrusion removed.

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Toyota Prius Plug-in Hybrid car review

thegrouch

Re: What I find objectionable is

Yes but road tax has nothing to do with road maintenance.

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How Bodyform's farting 'CEO' became a viral sensation

thegrouch
Devil

I'm sick of reading about this, I hope this is the last I hear of it. Period.

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SAP customers fancy licence payments 'holiday'

thegrouch

SAP is expensive

In other news, bears defecate in the woods.

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Amazon prices up Kindle Paperwhite for Blighty

thegrouch

It says eight weeks with the backlight on in the article. Less than the 30 you get with the standard Kindle but then who leaves the light on for eight weeks?

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Russian Christians boosted by Pussy Riot law spank 'sinful' Apple logo

thegrouch
Thumb Down

I just don't get religion

I'm at a loss to understand why folk base all their beliefs on a book of legends, translated from different languages multiple times. In the Bible it states that those without beards should be put to death and that your children can be sold as slaves. You'd be hard put to find a Christian who supports those views but the bit about men not 'lying' with other men has to be adhered to without question. It's all hypocritical bullshit, all of it.

I'm of the opinion that religion has done nothing to benefit the world at all, it has stunted our development as a species, been responsible for millions of deaths and even today is the cause of more conflict than any border dispute or sabre rattling. It's used as an excuse across the world to bring death and despair, the repression of women and persecution of minorities. I'm heartily sick of it, this apple bitten bollocks is just another example of why we're going backwards not forwards.

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BBC unveils UltraViolet DVDs, BDs

thegrouch

Re: No such thing as UV DVD

Bigfinish.com are the only company I can think of which offers both formats for one price. Each CD sale includes an MP3 download which is accessed from your account. If you only want the download, the price is cheaper.

However there's nothing to stop you then selling the CD on again on eBay and keeping the download for yourself but I guess BF have learned to live with this and are happy to give their customers the flexibility. Can't imagine any of the big record companies or publishers doing this.

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thegrouch

Re: No such thing as UV DVD

Unfortunately content isn't available immediately consistently across the world due to staggered release times. Combined with region locking, the distributors seem determined to milk local markets as best they can. No wonder piracy is rife, when a film is released on DVD in the US before it's even reached our cinema screens then there will always be those who can't wait. I wonder if a simultaneous release worldwide for a film, followed by the same for the DVD/Blu-Ray would reduce this. If it's there for everyone at the same time, there's no incentive to pirate it from another region.

As for UV, this is meaningless to me having only a 2Mb (at best) connection. Streaming anything beyond a small window in Youtube is impossible. I'm doubtful that broadband provision in this country is up to the job yet, even in built-up areas. I'm happy with hard media while it's still available. I'm only ever going to watch it on a TV or laptop anyway which already have suitable drives. I can't imagine why anyone would stream a film to a phone or tablet. Aside from the screen size, if you're using your contract data allowance I can see it disappearing pretty quick.

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Facebook's CHAIR sat on by 1 billion people ... bitch

thegrouch
Joke

Sitting on a chair

I'm reminded of the dangers of sitting on a chair from Pete and Dud's 'Dirty Uncle Bertie' sketch..

"Roger, in order for you to be brought about, it was necessary for your mother and I - to do something. In particular, it was necessary for your mother… it was necessary for your mother - to sit on a chair. To sit on a chair which I had recently vacated, and which was still warm from my body. And then, something very mysterious, rather wonderful and beautiful happened. And sure enough, four years later you were born."

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Climate change threatens to SHRINK FISH AND CHIP SUPPERS

thegrouch
Trollface

Hmm, I think you're more likely to be getting served Pollock rather than Cod these days. Not that the man in the chip shop will tell you that...

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Samsung chips evicted from iPhone 5, autopsy reveals

thegrouch
Thumb Down

Re: Relativity

But the point is you can do it yourself in seconds with other phones. Having to send the thing back to Apple or drop into a shop just to change a faulty battery is madness.

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Mars rover Curiosity gets ready to blast its first rock

thegrouch
Thumb Up

Can't get tired of stories featuring Opportunity.

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UK.gov blacklists Fujitsu from future contracts - report

thegrouch

I accept that most (if not all) of the big consultancies are unable to manage a Govt project properly. However I don't imagine that a public sector managed project would be any better. I think the suggestion earlier of smaller projects with SME's in charge is a far better solution.

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Dredd movie review

thegrouch

Re: You all need to see it because

Possibly because an exploding gun next to her head might not be ideal?

I think all the moaners on here who haven't seen the film should give it a chance. Judicious use of CGI and pretty backgrounds don't make a film any better. See the risible Total Recall remake for a fine example of this.

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UK.gov's web filth block plan: Last chance to speak your brains

thegrouch
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Re: ISP (on behalf of the state): Would you like us to impose our morals on your lifestyle?

You've missed the point. It's not about hindering the availability of 'fap' material, it's about control and censorship. I doubt it'll worry you as you seem like enough of a w@nker already.

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thegrouch
FAIL

It smacks of the old argument about video nasties from years ago, 'oh we have to protect the children'. Well I don't recall it making monsters out of a generation and ironically those same films are now mostly available uncut on DVD. It's nothing to do with censorship and all about control and the imposition of someone else's morals on your lifestyle.

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iPhone 5 wait drives record Samsung smartphone sales

thegrouch
Thumb Down

Re: Nonsense fake numbers...

You are the ghost of Steve Jobs and I claim my £5

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'Nutjob' serves half-baked Raspberry PI scam

thegrouch

Re: I'm reminded of a Python sketch for some reason....

I should point out that Graham Chapman is sporting a huge false nose.

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thegrouch

I'm reminded of a Python sketch for some reason....

Interviewer Good evening. I have with me in the studio tonight one of the country's leading skin specialists - Raymond Luxury Yacht.

Raymond That's not my name.

Interviewer I'm sorry - Raymond Luxury Yach-t.

Raymond No, no, no - it's spelt Raymond Luxury Yach-t, but it's pronounced 'Throatwobbler Mangrove'.

Interviewer You're a very silly man and I'm not going to interview you.

Raymond Ah, anti-semitism!

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Curiosity parks for a day, looks back in wonder

thegrouch

I thought the morse code came from the track pattern in the wheels?

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Amazon UK to offer collection service at corner shops

thegrouch

Royal Mail "leave with neighbour" opt-out details

You need to ask for a sticker to put on or near your letterbox.

http://public.datasquirt.co.uk/cscommsroyalmail/forms/Delivery%20to%20Neighbour%20Opt-out

I'll be opting out, we took in a parcel for next-door once and he got the arse because we didn't drop it round the instant he arrived home. Then again, he is a twunt of the first order.

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Flash Player to vanish from Android store on Wednesday

thegrouch

Re: Facebook AIDS?

Not as bad as Flying Aids

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NASA’s new lander CRASHES AND BURNS

thegrouch

Speaking of Armstrong

This footage reminds me of the test of the LLRV when he had to hit the eject button just seconds before it crashed. He must have had nerves of steel to pilot the real thing down to the Moon.

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Doctor Who to unwrap new sidekick in Christmas TV special

thegrouch

Richard E Grant

According to Russell Davies, R.E.G. gave such a phoned-in performance of the Doctor in his animated debut that he guaranteed he'd never be considered for the real thing.

Now if they can get Ecclesdoc and that excitable fellow back for a 50th anniversary special, then I'll be interested.

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UK.gov: Real time PAYE and new benefits systems WILL work

thegrouch
FAIL

Yeah right.

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Being a skinny is much more unhealthy than being fat – new study

thegrouch

To paraphrase Bill Hicks

We fatties have got all kinds of shit to cure us, statins, liposuction, gastric bypass. It's you skinnies dying of nothing who are screwed!

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