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* Posts by Jediben

356 posts • joined 6 Feb 2012

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Dead STEVE JOBS was a CROOK - Judge

Jediben

Rotten Apple

<eom>

6
2

PRISM leaks: WTF, you don't spy on your friends, splutters EU

Jediben
Black Helicopters

Well I would post a comment...

But at this rate, they probably already know what I am going to say.

10
0

Throwing arms let humans rise above poo-flinging apes to play CRICKET

Jediben

In memory of Eadon

Who says monkeys can't throw? Look at BALLMER and his chair!

MICROSOFT EPIC FAIL!

21
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How City IT is under attack from politicians, diesel bugs, HR

Jediben
Stop

"One of the larger transformer buildings in the heart of the City almost next to where the Stock Exchange servers live is surprisingly warm to the touch. Yes that’s a lot of power, and no I’m not saying where."

Please do say where, and contact your local distribution company to advise them. Electrical safety is very important and the distribution networks are massive. Don't fart about when public safety could be at risk.

If it's London, tell UK Power Networks - http://www.ukpowernetworks.co.uk/internet/en/contact-us/

4
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Trick-cyclist's claim: I have FOUND how to get GIRLS INTO TECH

Jediben
Trollface

Shut up and get off the internet, Mum.

1
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Telly psychics fail to foresee £12k fine for peddling nonsense

Jediben

<Rainier Wolfcastle> "On a bed of money, with many beautiful ladies."

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Jediben
Headmaster

Re: Astrology

You were correct - and it wasn't AstroNoMy either.

3
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Pirate Bay founder Warg jailed for two years for hacking and fraud

Jediben
Big Brother

Re: Finding Evidence ..

Hmm... restored or "restored"?

0
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Sony sucker-punches Xbox on price, specs, DRM-free gaming

Jediben
Holmes

Re: Waiting for "Kinect: PRISM"

Why not just turn the thing around so it's facing the telly and not you?

0
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Whitehall grants freetards safe haven until 2015

Jediben
FAIL

"Ofcom also confirms the minority are wealthy, middle class (ABC1) and under 34 years old. Quite why the Whitehall bureaucrat should rush to the defence of a banker in his Docklands penthouse who is downloading torrents 24x7 remains a mystery. Thanks to Whitehall, he's now a member of what is possibly the most pampered group in Britain."

Piss off.

Exactly how is being part of that minority group "pampered" - what is he getting from the powers that be because he's a wealthy (i.e paying his own way rather than taking state handouts) middle class (i.e not attempting to push out a full football team from his loins) under 34 year old (so no fuel allowance, TV licence discount, free bus pass for him) male that NO ONE else can get?

8
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All major UK ISPs prepping network-level porn 'n' violence filters

Jediben
Joke

Re: "how to deal with age verification online"

"My daughter (still at school) got a happy 23rd birthday message from facebook. Some work still needed there then."

Now now, there's no shame in being older than your teacher. It's clearly the US education system at fault!

But may I recommend she read a book some time soon?

0
1

BSkyB-owned BE slams into traffic pile-up over 'unlimited' broadband lie

Jediben
WTF?

Re: Come on 150GB a month

Or between 7 and 12 major game releases in a month via Steam/Origin etc. Max Payne 3 was recently on sale at £4 a pop, and that weighs in at 35GB. 150 a month is not a massive amount of data at all.

9
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Reports: New Xbox could DOOM second-hand games market

Jediben

Re: silly argument

Because Steam has this function built in. You add a game to a 'wishlist' and Steam emails you when any titles on the list are discounted.

2
0

Paul Allen buys lovingly restored vintage V-2 Nazi ballistic missile

Jediben
Joke

Re: Fired in Anger?

Perhaps it's a typo and he meant they were being launched from between Nantes and Le Mans?

4
0

O2 brushed off outsourcing 'rumour' - but it's happening ... to THOUSANDS

Jediben
Devil

Re: Outsourcing does not equal offshoring

"With over 11,000 employees and sixteen centres in the UK and offshore centres in India and Poland, Capita is one of the largest companies of its kind."

That doesn't mean anything. They could have 10,998 employees in 14 centres in India, and a bloke called Dave in Shrewsbury occasionally ringing Petr in Warsaw to make sure that he's not too lonely!

0
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Microsoft reveals Xbox One, the console that can read your heartbeat

Jediben
WTF?

Re: Not looking too good

That's because Valve and Steam have sales with incredible regularity - games of a certain age are guaranteed to be sold at a price that reflects their actual value in these events, rather than the hugely inflated prices of the console games. Impulse purchases at £45 a pop don't happen, but at sub £10 Steam makes huge sales. That is why you don't hear Steam user complaints - if you wait long enough, it gets sold at a huge discount. This doesn't happen with 'new' (but ancient) console games.

When you pay less than £7 for a game in this event, you don't have to consider any lost 'resale' value due to the account-only feature inherent in Steam. I can count on my litle fingers the number of games I've been able to buy through Xbox Live for a similar price (and that was by exploiting a US site sale to get MGS 2+3 rather than Xbox uk).

If Live will emulate Steam with these sales is yet to be seen, but I'm going to guess that they won't.

That is why you don't hear Steam user complaints - if you wait long enough it gets sold at a huge discount.

3
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Petshop iPad fanboi charged with filming up young model's skirt

Jediben
Trollface

Re: Unofficial CCTV

Plenty! Just have a flcik through my home movie collection!

1
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I said ‘no’ to a million-pound Tech City empire

Jediben
Trollface

Re: Rent the floor...

S&M club then. Lingerie models on one side, ancient cobwebby stonework and old machinery on the other. Readily available London weirdos with disposable cash and suspect interests (i.e. politicos) and you will be quids in.

Plus you can set your IT skills to rigging up the hidden CCTV to keep the brown envelopes rolling in!

5
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Foxconn still flogging iWorkers, but more lightly

Jediben
Meh

Re: Cloud cuckoo land

I think it's more likely that a vast readership of the Register don't have any first hand experience of the living conditions, working conditions, work ethics, socio-economic environment or cultural backdrop of mainland China, so passing judgement about such things might be deemed unsavoury?

We hear about the huge factories, kilometres in size, and it sounds ghastly.

How can you criticise someone who is forced to endure that environment out of necessity?

0
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Prankster 'Superhero' takes on robot traffic warden AND WINS

Jediben
Trollface

Re: I think you'll also find...

And one does not simply WALK into Yate shopping centre.

8
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Things that cost the same as coffee with Tim Cook - and are WAY more fun

Jediben

Re: Or...

No, I don't drink any coffee at all. Foul stuff.

Tea for me, unlimited volumes!

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1
Jediben
Happy

Re: Or...

Ahhh an EXTRA 2 cups a day.

This makes sense now. As I partake only of tea, in constant supply without breaks, the idea of a measured serving of beverage is quite alien to me!

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Jediben
WTF?

Re: Or...

Am I being thick here?

248980/2 = 124490 days with coffee

124490/365 = 341 years.

Where does 227 come from?

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Senators: You - Cook. Apple guy. Get in here and bring your tax books

Jediben
FAIL

I guess corporations don't benefit from interest either, and this is a priviledge afforded only to individuals huh?

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Jediben
Trollface

Next stop for the War on <your political agenda here>

The Cayman Islands. Pack your sunscreen, marines! Hoorah!

2
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Queen's Speech: 'Problem of matching IP addresses' to be probed

Jediben
Devil

Re: The police are as bad

Or they have been dialling xxx.xxx.xxx.xxx to try to reach you at work.

When they got no reply they tried calling you at yyy.yyy.yyy.yyy in case you were at the office...

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Google Glass eye-cam to turn us all into right little winkers

Jediben
Devil

Re: They're going to be banned in my house.

They'll just have to stand on the flowerbeds and peer in through the windows like the rest of us then.

I CAN SEE YOOOOOUUUU!

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Jediben
Devil

Re: why should you go round filming people

And you'll have all the witness in the queue formed behind him as well.

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Reg boffins: Help us answer this Big Blue RAID data recovery poser

Jediben
Coffee/keyboard

Genius.

1
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Apple fanbois get one last chance to see spectre of Steve Jobs

Jediben
Angel

Re: fallacy of supply shortage

Ok, survey time:

Thumbs up if you tried to buy these tickets.

Thumbs down if you don't give a crap about it.

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36
Jediben
Trollface

Creating the fallacy of supply shortage: Check

Choosing random sample and offering special treatment to drive the rapturous into paroxysms of joy: Check

Charging an arm and a leg for an uninspiring product or service: Check

Apple as usual, move along...

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Pirate Bay docks in Iceland

Jediben
Devil

Re: I may have dreamed this...

But if that recent app is to believed, the gorgeous blondes are probably their cousins/sisters/worse.

1
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Review: Asus PadFone 2 phone-tablet combo

Jediben
Unhappy

Re: Padfone Transformer

Of course, they would need to up the tablet quality to that of the Prime too, so the price might brush uncomfortably close to £1000.

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Jediben
Happy

Padfone Transformer

This. It's a damn shame they didn't have the phone dock at the top edge, and the keyboard dock on the bottom as with the Prime.

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'You can keep it' - Brit's nicked laptop turns up on Iranians' sofa

Jediben
Pint

Goddamn that's a lot of typing errors. I blame Friday.

0
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Jediben

Well that the laptop wa stolen is not in dispute, and the relative cost to the insurer for of recovery of said laptop may well exceed the cost of a replacement (although being an Apple product, a return flight to Iran might well end up cheaper!).

I don't think his insurer would stretch its resources as far as liasing with Iranian police forces to retrieve it.

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Jediben
FAIL

Re: Minor point

Oh if only he wasn't a British citizen and completely free of obligation to adhere to US laws...

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Card skimmers targeting more than ATMs, says EU

Jediben
Joke

Re: because everyone loves anecdotal evidence.

I know that my bank suggests I advise them when I'm leaving the country to avoid this sort of thing. They never accept the invitation to view my holiday snaps after though.

1
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Jediben
Big Brother

Time to get a hand on this

Literally. Thumb + forefinger print recognition along with a card and a PIN. Sadly it means we're going to be screwed over with feature creep etc ("I say Mr Chancellor, is that a big brown envelope you have there? would you like us to send this database anywhere special?") but the effort one would need to go to in order to fake it would virtually eliminate small scale shenanigans.

1
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Nvidia unveils Minority Report-style face-bot tech

Jediben
FAIL

It's all in the eyes

The skin textures, the pores, the elasticity of movement - all of these are exceptional in Ira. But the glassy, permanently dewy and overly reflective eyeballs sink it every time.

4
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Young model ruthlessly fingers upskirt iPad petshop pervert

Jediben
Joke

Re: Her Mutt

Any pictures of said mutt? Not to be confused with her growler of course...

6
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NASA chief: Earth is DOOMED if we spot a big asteroid at short notice

Jediben
Trollface

Not even as innocent at that - they're making up a number that theyhope will give the impression that while they do a VERY GOOD JOB with their current resources, there is still a measurable improvement (which is not an unreasonably large amount as to suggest they are not doing very well, but enough to make it worth investigating whether this improvement can be met) that could be gained if they receive MORE MONEY.

FUD 101 - suggest could be much worse if you weren't here, and even better if you pay me more, but completely theoretical and unproveable in all instances.

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Jediben
Devil

Re: Well, just don't look then

Ironic really, as digging very deep holes and learning how to survive in them would probably be our best shot at surviving the impact of such an asteroid which we are deliberately trying NOT to see!

1
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SanDisk cops to malfunctioning Micro SDs in Galaxy S3s

Jediben
Devil

Re: Seen it happen on a 64GB card

I hope he did - downsizing workers is meant to be a HR job.

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Build a BONKERS gaming PC

Jediben
FAIL

Monitor?

No point in spending so much money on a 'bonkers' (I have better) pc at home if you are going to plug is into a 21" cheapo monitor. Splash another grand on a 30" Dell fercryingoutloud.

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Samsung's new Galaxy S 4: iPhone assassin or Android also-ran?

Jediben
Trollface

Re: Its just a phone

Something like:

<Ring Ring... ring Ring..Ring>

"Hello?"

4
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Jediben
Trollface

Re: whopper

I've had plenty of practice using both hands, no worries there!

2
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New Apple TV may hint at Apple-Samsung divorce

Jediben
Thumb Up

Re: Lost interest after ATV 2nd gen

WD TV Live ftw. Works with Logitech Harmony remotes too!

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