91 posts • joined 19 Jan 2012
Re: Add the 3d farce
When i come across eastern european youngsters i find that their english is worlds ahead of what a german kid is mumbling. Quite sure, they did not learn it in school. So i went to ask them. They are watching the same rubbish TV series and movies from the states as the tschörman kids. Only, in their countries the "content" is neither subbed or dubbed.
there. Went to the Space Shuttle warehouse, took what´s left of the project from the shelves, bundled it up with a rubberband and sold it as a new thingy to NASA. Not before sticking on new price tags of course.
No they are gathered in the secret basement of Boing Central so noone can hear the popping of champagne bottles and their evil laughter. Looking forward to the doubling of "development" time, trippling of the production costs and the tenfold rise of their boni. Conspiracy? Don´t be paranoid. Go find professional help.
are not terrorist targets. Entebbe, Nairobi, Djibouti, Addis Ababa, Abuja ... one could walk through the "checks" with whatever one likes. And that´s just a few airports i know of myself. 9/11 was different, they turned the planes into weapons. Paris, Brussels, Frankfurt, Istanbul ... what excellent targets. But it´s not going to happen. With the Twin Tower attacks AQ got what they want. "Mission Accomplished". The "Free World" no longer exists. Treeelions spent on useless security measures and 90% of the worlds population turned into per se suspects of whatever. A genius strike, one has to addmit. So give me back my shaving foam and shower gel.
Who the hell wants to go Nazi America? I frequently have words with my boss ´cause he wants to send me there for conferences and what not. "I will Not!" Pratchett/Baxter readers will know what i mean.
Re: Fan Bingbing?
No trolling here but Jaja Bing to my mind
"Of all tyrannies, a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience."
Clive Staples Lewis * 29. November 1898† 22. November 1963
The world was such a nice place living in West - Berlin. The flat lit up by the search lights from east of the Wall, smoking joints, reading the "Illuminatus" books and getting frickin´ paranoid. Half a life later it turns out that Robert Anton Wilson and H.G. Wells did not catch a glimpse of what was going on even in their times. Nowadays one does not need any dope or LSD to be caught up in paranoia. Reality beats the worst trip one could "tune in" to.
Best reasonable priced headphones ever produced.
I´m right now flipping through "Das Buch der Astronautik" by A.F. Marfeld published in 1963.
It´s an amazing manual of how to get things into space. With the history, math, physics and chemistry and whatever one needs to get going. Pre moon landing hardcore.
You touch them, that´s it
Ever thought i was cool until i dreamt Doom
IT and conferencing
I feel for the IT guys who get put in charge of the conference facilities in their companies.
Just because a presentation laptop is connected to the conference system, it does not mean its all IT.
In 99% of SMEs the conference technic goes to either the IT departement or the guy who changes the bulbs and mows the lawn. They hate doing it because it keeps them away from the job they´ve been hired for. What with all the hussle with coke fuelled managers insisting to show their 1024x768 slides in HD.
The companies are blowing out megatons of cash for conference facilities since they want to look posh in front of their clients. Which is often very embarassing, since there is noone there to operate that shit properly. Who gets the blame? The IT departement (since a presentation laptop is involved and the ever failing videoconference system runs over IP). I bet, many IT guys would rather happily fix uncle Herbert´s slow internet then having to cope with systems in their company which are not their field of experties and they don´t want anything to do with.
I salute you and raise a pint for everyone concerned
There should be an Award somewhere for HAB footage like that.
If you ever happen to come to Munich i would be honored to take you out to the Forschungsbrauerei (Research Brewery) for a beer or two. It does not come in Pints but in Mass (1 Liter).
Xlnt work! Both LOHAN and the Booze
to see Roaches? Come to Uganda.
Half a foot of length is not uncommon.
ElReg, pse let us attach photos to our comments.
There´s a company called "Roachman" in Kampala driving around town in cars with supersized roach models on the roof . Cats help a lot. They actually eat them after they had their fun with them. If you smash them their eggs are splad all over the place. So that does not really help. The South Africans have come up with a spray called "Doom!" and boy, it does the job. Can´t buy it in europe because of some chemical warfare barriers. It´s a nerve gas tailored for these bastards and works on mosquitos as well. You better have some drinks outside on the veranda after spraying before you go back inside.
Re: I can't believe you guys are so gullible
You Sir owe me a keyboard.
tied to their employer whether they like it or not,
you chose the wrong life ... Go back to start or continue to be a slave, looser
"the number of people citing no religious belief increased from 8 to 18 per cent between 1990 and 2010"
So, if one looks linear, it will take another ~ 200 years for mankind to overcome the worst desease that ever befelt it. At that time waterlevels will have risen to catastrophic heights, due to a popular religion (Treehuggers). Resulting in the launch of Noah´s Ark 2.0 and it all starts over again. We are trapped in a hamster wheel!
Re: That´s the Spirit ...
Mate, i´ve been to Lagos around this time as well. 300 workstation internet cafés packed with 419 scammers and every 15 mins or so one of the guys hit "Bingo". It was Clondyke River all over again. A home and shoes for the kids. Not provided by some gooddoing NGO´s but by outsmarting greedy first world c*unts. It was lovely
That´s the Spirit ...
of bringing IT into the remote areas of the world!
Reminds me of going to Karamoja (Northern Uganda) to set up a training center.
It was the Win2k times on PII boxes. Traveling in a battered Land Rover with all the gear inside and few hundred liters of fuel plus the gen set on the roof. We were delayed by three hours cause this bloody lion decided to take a nap in the middle of the road (for better words) and no AC. The Lucent Technologies 5Mb cards worked a treat but it took 3 days to get the f****ng sat com going. Couldn´t leave the hut at night due to roaming hyenas. The spider was a brown widow and the resulting necrosis from the bites could only be treated some days later. Looks like shrapnel wounds. The exchange rate in the pub was one AK47 bullet for a beer. It still is. The training center was scorched by rebels.
Re: NSA and GCHQ - HuaWei's ...
I am just now charging my Ascend P6 for the first time.
It was smooth sailing with Nokia for more than a decade but one has to draw a line.
Now i´m looking for a non Yank OS to get rid of Google. Tips anyone?
the reason to wear a belt
Quis custodit custodes
Respect, Mr. Icahn. You are taking your rights as a shareholder serious and have real questions for the board. Shareholders are the ones who own the company and it is their responsibility to audit the board. Why should wazisname get away with sinking 700 mio? With shareholders taking more responsibility a lot more of this incompetent or even criminal behaviours would come to daylight.
Apart from almost single handly erradicating Polio YOU NUMB!!!
Well, that thing and a great deal of Tundra Perma Frost just melted away while the Athmosphere did not heat up "The last 15 years or so"?
Re: So forward looking in Munich
Mate, you wouldn´t want to live in a (small) City where 50% of native inhabitants suffer of Tourette - Syndrom. Libre Office or not. They should have a border. 50m high and backfilled with concrete.
Vorsprung durch Technik
would be Ingolstadt
Re: She is a genius
Yes, and have Siemens have go ... HehehaaaaahaaahaahHa .....
Re: Siemens or some other EU country can make the equipment, no problem there.
Siemens? Don´t make me laugh! They don´t even get a train on the rails.
Backbone: Laser Semaphores
Last Mile: Talking Drums
both Enigma cyphered.
High latency but safe.
Movie streaming might suffer but we are talking safe communication not Entertainment.
Jobs for sub saharan people ...
Must meet noise pollution regulations like airports.
So, no nightly e-mails from the Boss...
Just perfect ...
Of course, as someone who used to drink Jagermeister from a pint glass....
Since there´s no cocgnac bowl icon ... Have n´t touched a Jägermeister since 3 decades but a spanish brandy is nothing to cough at.
The main question is: What choice of Brandy put Lester in the state of mind of a 12 year old to enable him to handle the Pi?
Re: I married an eye surgeon
So let me put this into one short sentence:
It is now realised that this affects peripheral vision and night vision without the subject being aware of the deficit, and we expect that at some stage (it wil be a while, this is HMG after all) there will be a slew of letters going out to those who've had this treatment (details obtained from the surgical logs under public health regulations, we are talking about the control of large metal things hurtly about the highways at speed) advising them that until they get these factors tested in an extended ophthalmic examination, and pass, that they no longer meet the vision criteria for driving and their licences are accordingly withdrawn.
Have a Pint
Where´s the Klemperer rosette then?
Using the mouse on the screen, anyone else?
It must have been the cousin of the lady who tried using the mouse as a pointing device.
Where´s the fun
in computer games without a Jolly Good Fellow?
Can´t be bothered
Some say he/she´s been moulded without a serial number to cover up his/her existence at all. All we know is: He/ She´s might be retreating to the mysterious Swedish lesbian enclave to recover from his/her astounding stratodangles. Pics pse.
I´ve been technically supervising a union conference until one hour ago.
There was a guy using the same grammar like Yoda.
In German, with an Austrian accent.
16 interpreters got completly lost in the attempt to translate what this bloke was talking about.
I had to run outside. Hilarious!
To You Grammar Nazi Commentards: I´m Dschörmän and looking forward Your ´tars about my own grammar. Be with may you the encyclopedia britannica.
Blew the roof off any garden shed ever built
Now, where comes the frogman in?
Re: Parallel parking in space
LEGO vs. Playmobile
Playmobile created a shisma. Good old LEGO had to come up with an anwser and came out with kits and building plans. Before that it was bags of blocks in different shapes and colours. I remember that X-Mas when grandpa presented me with a LEGO kit of a scandinavian ferry of about 400 bricks. The neighbours boy received the Playmobile "Pirate Ship". Nothing to assemble, just there. We used the LEGO bricks to build a landing site for the pirate ship. Playmobile killed off a lot of creative challenge by providing a ready to use toy. Hence the lack of engineer students today. LEGO and Fischer Technik where the toys (tools) of the time. Playmobile killed it. Just unwrap it and play.
get over it. If would not have been for a recovered code book of a sunk U-Boot and the excellent work of some polish mathematicians Mr. Turing and the Bombe wouldn´t have gone anywhere.
Didn´t get the message
Must have been hit between the ears as well. Please Sir, let me go back and have the rest of myself being blown to pieces since it did not really work out the first time. Numb Nut. High Command must be laughing their balls off over idiots like him who happily limp back to the butcher´s. Well, better that way, then having this sort of guys hanging around in the local pub bloating about, what heroes they are. And definitly better then me being press ganged to step on a landmine in a country where the locals don´t want me to bring peace, democracy... (fill in).
What a moron
Re: Be careful for what you ask for, you might get it!
The NRA will pass a law that makes owning a 3D printer with the "plan" a nessecitie for every US household.
A 5 year old boy does not need to ask his parents for a Kinder rifle before shooting his sister. Print,Bang,Done
Perhaps some political re education will sort that out.
Yeah, you guys invented the Concentration Camps
This guy´s selling skills must be off the top shelf.
To get into business with the likes who are running failed states like Iraq or Kenia there is no way around the "brown envelope", as its called in Uganda (another failed state). The UN does it, WHO and WFP do. He should be aknowleged for exposing this greedy, corrupt bastards on the opposite side of the counter. That these bastards are even considering to get away with such a fraud shows how "morally corrupt the society of a country in its self is"(citation of an Ugandan MP). For getting an IED or car bomb into the green zone of Baghdad it only needs some Bakshish or "I know, where your family lives" to pass the roadblock. Operational searching device or not. McCormick has outstanding sales skills and should be, if at all, sentenced to 10 years of shoe repairs and key copying. Well, he might own the company after he´s done his time. Business idea for free: Divining rods for minesweepers.
Icon: My butler, checking my coat for IEDs before i put on
" when a degree was a rare badge of distinction, rather than something which fell out of your cornflakes packet following three years of alcohol-fuelled fornication."
may i use it?
Re: Bloody Americans
stop whinging ...
There´s a ruling in NY that if one looks at its female coworker for more then 8 seconds its sexual harassement.
I wouldn´t even pass Immigration. My wife is of african orign and she is "Proud to be Black", my daughter insits of "Chocolate". Plus they are proud of their female assets and you are welcome to admire them (visualy) as much as you like. There has just been a case in Germany where a politician tried to chat up a journalist and she went completly off the tracks and public.
Back to the point: Being aged 13 there wasn´t a stripper who could shock me with anything anymore. And that was far before the interweb. Like:oh,it´s my 18th birthday but you are still only 17. we are shagging since 2 years now but the law says that from today on i have sexual intercourse with a minor. Nothing wrong for a 13 year old boy watching a female in a bikini singing "Happy Birthday". Goes home and has a wank (if he liked it).
I go whereever my company sends me , near, far, middle East, Eastern Europe, the Africas. But they accept that i won´t go to the U.S.A. It´s still a land of the free but until you put your laywers on the next pole all this O.J.Simpsons and "he looked at me in a harassing way" wont go away. And yes i am 13 and love to watch a stripper.
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