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* Posts by markw:

76 posts • joined 18 Jan 2012

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Ex–Apple CEO John Sculley: Ousting Steve Jobs 'was a mistake'

markw:

Camp ...

Why do they look so camp in the photo?

And how can you tell if they are wearing suspenders?

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Inmarsat: Doppler effect helped 'locate' MH370

markw:

Re: 19th Century Physics Fail.

So Reg, a fundamental schoolboy error!

Now you know how Stephen Fry feels.

Except that he is not a reporter on a tech publication.

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Bletchley boffins go to battle again: You said WHAT about Colossus?

markw:

Re: Colossus is in H Block

Who are Colossus Rebuild Limited?

I can't seem to find exactly who they are, what they do and who are the owners ...

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Tornado-chasing stealth Batmobile set to invade killer vortices

markw:

Re: Bloody Merican mutilation of English

It's it's not its.

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Star Wars movie to start shooting in UK this summer

markw:

Re: 'Star Wars movie to start shooting in UK this summer'

Correct—but I think you meant knob...

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ZEPPELINS to replace Goodyear blimps in American skies

markw:

Re: Yes it's a blimp.

I remember that gay used to mean homosexual.

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Muslim clerics issue fatwa banning the devout from Mars One 'suicide' mission

markw:

Ars Technica

This story appeared in Ars Technica two days ago I expect rather quicker cutting and pasting er... I mean reporting from The Register.

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Apple marks '1984' anniversary with iPhone-produced un-commercial

markw:

Re: "the square root of negative yo momma."

The square root of minus one has been trademarked by Apple.

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Antarctic ice shelf melt 'lowest EVER recorded, global warming is NOT eroding it'

markw:

Re: Nice article

All squids are at the very least damp.

Perhaps you meant damp squib.

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BlackBerry CEO John Chen: Y'know what, we'll go back to enterprise stuff

markw:

Re: The proof, of course, will be in the pudding.

Which comes from a time when alcohol was "proved" (i.e. tested) to ensure it wasn't watered down.

Perhaps the journos have been at the electric soup?

Or perhaps standards of literacy ain't wot they used to be ...

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markw:

The proof, of course, will be in the pudding.

Of course it won't because this is nonsense.

The proof of the pudding is in the eating.

Proof in this sense means test.

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'F*** off, Google!' Protest blockades Google staff bus AGAIN – and Apple's

markw:

Re: Why not follow the lead of that other chocolate factory?

Unfortunately Cadbury was sold out to the Krap Corporation by its disgusting senior management.

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El Reg Contraption Confessional No.1: The Dragon 32 micro

markw:

Re: One suggestion

No. Just No...

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Britain’s forgotten first home computer pioneer: John Miller-Kirkpatrick

markw:

Bought one... Still got it...

I bought a Scrumpi kit. £60 for a kit was a very large sum at the time.

Power supply not included. You had to program in binery since both data and address buses were shown by LEDs and data set by switches. I wore out the right hand “Step” switch.

It eventually ended up in college in a Differential Pulse Polarography rig.

It had a very expensive 12 bit A/D converter and an 8 bit D/A (output to a chart recorder).

I interfaced a bought-in board so that I could record/read data from a cassette recorder. I sent off to have a 32x8 PROM programmed which was used to boot from. I expanded the memory with SRAM on a bit of veroboard. I think to 1.5k.

The whole lot was self-funded from my grant (remember those!) as none of my lecturers knew WTF I was on about.

Still got the whole thing somewhere. Must find it and see if it still works…

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Doctor Who: From Edwardian grump to Malcolm Tucker and back again

markw:

The new Doctor

Well why not a woman?

Why not Bonnie Langford as Dr Who?

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Microsoft touts SCROOGLE merch: Hopes YOU'LL PAY to dump on rival

markw:

Another mug...

KEEP CALM

AND

CARRY ON

LIKE A FAT SWEATY CHIMP

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'I'm BIG, I'm BALD and I'm LOUD!' Blubbering Ballmer admits HE was Microsoft's problem

markw:

It's the Brits wot dun it...

It's all our fault.

That visit to London and then Coldplay depressed him so much that he just gave up.

Will we ever live it down...

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Who! wants! cursed.com? Yahoo! flogs! domains! in! multimillion-dollar! sale!

markw:

Poo

It can be quite amusing to see what people have registered.

E.g. someone has registered PooReview.com.

Why?

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Thought you didn't need to show ID in the UK? Wrong

markw:

Re: ryanair

Yes, but only because there isn't a worse word available.

A deficiency in the English language ...

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Facebook fans fuel FAGGOT FURY firestorm

markw:

Re: Faggots, AKA "Savoury ducks" offensive?

"Bum a fag"

Or Burn a flag...

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Call yourself a 'hacker', watch your ex-boss seize your PC without warning

markw:

Re: So...

Hack: A writer of articles; a harmless drudge.

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Obama to Merkel: No Americans are listening to you on this call

markw:

But surely Germany...

But surely Germany is spying on American — and everyone else for that matter.

Or are they the only country in the world that is'nt?

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Dead Steve Jobs' Apple donut SPACESHIP HQ gets permission to land

markw:

Re: 2.8 million square foot?

2.8 million square feet with rounded corners...

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Ofcom set to fatten up London's White Space TV spectrum

markw:

Spelling!

meters -> metres

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Beat the UK's incoming smut filter: Pre-censor your grumble flicks

markw:

What's the problem?

Nothing has been censored. Nothing has changed.

The last time I visited my ISP's site (TalkTalk) I was asked if I wanted to activate a "child-friendly" filter. I ticked "no".

What is the problem exactly?

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Star Wars revival secret: This isn't the celluloid you're looking for

markw:

Re: Could be 65mm

None of the original was in 65mm. Although 2001 was...

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Nokia's India threat letter: 'It's cheaper to make phones in China'

markw:

Re: It might be cheaper 'today'

"Eventually, these conglomerates will run out of cheap places to 'make stuff'."

Eventually the greedy, rich first-world consumers will run out of cheap places to make the shiny shit they are addicted to.

There fixed it for you ...

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iWatch rumours grow as Apple hires Nike fitness guru Jay Blahnik

markw:

Re: Tom Lehrer? : Shakespeare

Richard III surely...

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London Mayor shows off GIANT BLUE COCK in busy square

markw:

Hooker in Dudley...

When I suggested you do this story in the comments of the "Hooker in Dudley..." article I thought that I was being ironic —oh well...

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Apple's shock treatment: An authentic charger-spotting guide

markw:

Right brand

Buying cheap chargers from eBay is stupid — as is buying official istuff.

Best to stick to known brands. I got a Belkin charger from ebuyer which cost three times as much as an eBay cheapie but still much less than igear. It is beautifully constructed.

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Hooker in Dudley man's car 'just helping to buy tomatoes'

markw:

Enormous blue cock

One has been erected in Trafalgar Square — another story for you ...

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'First' 3D-printed rifle's barrel splits after single shot

markw:

Re: One up the spout!

Igniting a bullet is impossible. Firing a round is possible but very dangerous no matter where you position yourself relative to the barrel.

Isn't getting a metal pipe from the hardware shop more effective than printing a plastics (and plastic) barrel?

Which is more dangerous a disintegrating plastics or metal barrel?

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Only 1 in 5 Americans believe in pure evolution – and that's an upswing

markw:

UK?

I wonder what the UK figures are. We can't be that stupid — surely ...

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Smartwatch makers: You need apps to beat Apple

markw:

Ugly

Sir Jony must have been delighted to see what the watches mentioned looked like. They seemed to have been designed by the geeks who did the hardware and the software. The trick for Apple is to design something that looks stylish enough. Nice screen, thin hardware etc. Functionality and battery life are low on the Hipster list of priorities.

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Worldwide smartwatch shipments predicted to top 5 million next year

markw:

Tosser

Every time I imagine someone (Stephen Fry) wearing an iWatch I see someone looking like a tosser. Is there any way of wearing one of these things without embarrassment?

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The facts on Trident 'cuts': What the Lib Dems want is disarmament

markw:

I want comments as usual...

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Apple 'iWatch' trademark filing hints Cook's make-or-break moment looms

markw:

Apple version of Google Glass

It's the ieye ...

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British lord sets new world electric vehicle speed record

markw:

Re: Crash

I'm more afraid of a Dreamliner-style self-sustaining fire. Deforming a liquid fuel tank in a shunt is usually not a problem. Deforming a lithium battery pack is more worrying. A liquid fuel tank can be penetrated by debris without incinerating the driver. With lithium batteries — well I'd want a Bond-style ejector seat.

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markw:

Crash

Lithium batteries in a shunt? Hmm ...

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Gourmet chemists sniff out ultimate cheese on toast

markw:

Microwave

Make toast days beforehand so it can dry out.

Add slices of cheese and nuke in microwave until it boils.

Eat immediately — even a few seconds spoils the taste.

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Is the next-gen console war already One?

markw:

Re: New controllers needed

"Kick in the balls..."

That's entertainment. That's entertainment...

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The bunker at the end of the world - in Essex

markw:

Useful...

It could still be useful if we could fill it with "top politicians and civil servants" and seal the massive blast-proof doors...

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Hello, Goodbye ... to $408,000: John Lennon axe under the hammer

markw:

Axe?

Surely only heavy metal tossers have "axes"?

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Creative Suite cloud lurch crushes beret-wearers' cost-slash bid

markw:

Re: Guess I'm the exception....

Great! I'm in the UK. Where do I pay my $50?

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Monitor-makers ponder Android-powered touch screens

markw:

Raspberry Pi

Plug it in — cheaper...

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Brit cops blow £14m on software - then just flush it down the bogs

markw:

Re: £13M?

This type of funeral only happens a handful of times a century. Government IT cockups on the other hand...

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The ten SEXIEST computers of ALL TIME

markw:

Re: Wot no SGI?

I remember the O2 had the cheapest looking and most flimsy CD drive of any computer that I've ever come across.

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US Navy blasts drones with ship-mounted LASER CANNON

markw:

Re: I find it interesting...

It is named after Ponce in the Commonwealth of Puerto Rico, which in turn was named after the Spanish explorer Juan Ponce de Leon, the first governor of Puerto Rico and European discoverer of Florida.

Still does not explain why you would want to end up with a ship named USS Ponce!

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