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* Posts by Crisp

1901 posts • joined 16 Jan 2012

Move space junk with laser shots

Crisp
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What happens when a pigeon flies through the beam of a 10kW laser?

See Title.

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DARPA looks for a guided bullet with DEAD reckoning navigation

Crisp
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Re: DARPA's research rarely produces tangible results

Yeah, like that ARPANet. Whatever happened to that pie in the sky project?

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Announcement of 'churnalism detector' gets furiously churned

Crisp
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Journalist Caught In Writing Own Words Shocker!

Journalism needs more original content.

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Mosaic turns 20: Let's fire up the old girl, show her the web today

Crisp
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Boffin

Re: NOW I feel old...

I still get flashbacks when I hear the sound of a modem handshaking.

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BadNews, fandroids: MILLIONS of Google Play downloads riddled with malware

Crisp
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Trollface

A Linux based OS with malware?

Where's Eadon when you need him?

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Hard luck lads, todger size DOES matter: Official

Crisp
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Re: Surely Pro. Randy Marsh has solved this for us?

That's TMI

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ICO probes Home Office refusal to reveal Snooper's Charter details

Crisp
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Paedophiles, Terrorists

Two words that are practically guaranteed to strike fear into the hearts of Daily Mail readers everywhere!

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Web minister Maria Miller: UK WILL hit 2015 broadband target

Crisp
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Re: Maria Miller Has no experience in telephony or networking

Her background is in marketing and advertising.

So, well... you be the judge.

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Crisp
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Maria Miller Has no experience in telephony or networking

And I have no confidence in her prediction.

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DDOS strikes BitCoin exchange Mt.Gox

Crisp
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Is it really a DDOS?

Or just another surge in demand?

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Google's Page drops the A-bomb: Google Glass runs Android

Crisp
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Re: It runs Android?

Who fucking let Gordon Fucking Ramsey in?

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Crisp
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Re: Stop Press

Reports from the UK suggest that the Sun has been missing since last summer.

(2011, if I recall correctly)

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The fast-growing energy source set to replace oil: Yes, it's COAL

Crisp
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Flame

Coal Picture

I could swear that looks like wood or charcoal burning.

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Malwarebytes declares Windows 'malicious', nukes 1,000s of PCs

Crisp
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Re: Scrum Development Process

If you're using a Scrum development framework, shouldn't you be designing unit tests as you go?

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Crisp
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Re: Testing updates prior to release

Because testing doesn't add value from a management perspective. Testing either reveals problems with the software, which then have to be fixed, which costs more time. Or Testing shows that everything is ok, in which case you might as well have skipped it anyway because it was obviously a waste of time.

Testing gets labelled as non-productive time and sidelined.

Until something goes wrong. Then some poor developer gets a kicking for making a mistake and not correcting it. Which is difficult when there's no decent testing process.

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Game designer spills beans on chubby-fancying chap with his stolen Mac

Crisp
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Re: Could be innocent

You aren't innocent if you're handling stolen goods.

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Google Glass will SELF-DESTRUCT if flogged on eBay

Crisp
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Re: Bloody Advert!

I only block the badly designed intrusive ads.

I still read the product reviews.

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Crisp
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Re: Bloody Advert!

Have you heard of AdBlock?

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Crisp
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Re: DSA doesn't apply if you've opened the box

Yes it does. I've recently had to return a mobile phone handset to Virgin Media, and they said they'd be quite happy to accept the return even if the security seal on the box had been broken.

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Crisp
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Re: so if I don't like it

They can take away a lot of your freedom in an EULA, but they can't touch your statutory rights.

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Crisp
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Once I've bought it, it's mine.

This is like a car manufacturer putting sugar in the tank of anyone that dares to sell their car second hand.

It's vandalism.

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Foxconn must pay Microsoft for EVERY Android thing it makes

Crisp
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Re: The biggest patent troll

They are very slowly digging their own graves.

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Crisp
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Re: I think that's why NEXUS have no sd card slot

If I need my phone to use a FAT file system to operate with my Windows PC, then didn't I buy a license to use FAT when I bought my copy of Windows 7?

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Crisp
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Re: …And we still have no idea what these patents are

You could be violating those patents right now!

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Crisp
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I'll bet that there's not one bit of code written by Microsoft in there.

Microsoft are trying to get rich off the back of other peoples hard work, without lifting a finger to do any work themselves.

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Boffins spin a solid state qubit in a nucleus

Crisp
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Re: quantum state or a Zen state?

There's no reason that it can't be both at the same time!

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Crisp
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Re: Nicho

It's quantum.

So you can sit there in a state of both understanding it and not understanding it at the same time.

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Antares aborted after launchpad mishap

Crisp
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Re: El Reg double entendre team

If that doesn't already exist, then it should!

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Crisp
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Wallops Flight Facility

Is that anywhere near the Crash Bang test range?

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Boffins build ant-sized battery, claim it's tough enough to start a car

Crisp
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Re: The problem with batteries ...

Well duh! When you design hardware, you design it with the limitations of the technology at hand.

If there were 6KWh batteries the size of a pinhead, you can bet that mobile phone manufacturers would add some feature that would drain that battery in minutes.

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T-Mobile UK ordered into humiliating Full Monty strip

Crisp
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Advertise some unlimited internet even if it's not.

After all, everyone knows that customers will be much more loyal to your brand once they find out you've lied to their face.

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Apple branded porno-peddling perverts by Chinese Pravda

Crisp
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Go

I'm going to reserve judgement until I see some evidence.

Sexy Evidence.

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Hardware hacker unifies 15 retro consoles in format frenzy

Crisp
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Re: Very good!

Sometimes there's no substitute for playing on original hardware.

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TalkTalk ads banned by watchdog over 'misleading' YouView offer

Crisp
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Re: "standard industry practice"

It's almost as if there's no real consequences to outright lying to the public...

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Gov.uk named THE BEST THING Britain has made all year

Crisp
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Obviously the Design Museum in London

Has never seen a decently designed website before.

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Samsung: Posting of fake HTC hate was 'unfortunate'

Crisp
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Re: The recent incident was unfortunate

I was just thinking the exact same thing. Why is it that they always say something like that only when they get caught.

They then say "We will continue to reinforce education and training for our employees to prevent any future recurrence." like it was some rogue employee that did the deed, rather than an actual co-ordinated marketing strategy. Which I found odd because they admitted that they have suspended anonymous "marketing activities".

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Eerie satnav boffinry claims it can predict THE FUTURE

Crisp
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Holmes

When drivers don’t pay attention to the road for protracted periods of time, bad things happen.

No shit Sherlock!

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Hands up who wants 3D finger-controlled fridges? That's the spirit

Crisp
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These patents are not designed to cultivate innovation

If anything, they seem specifically designed to prevent legitimate implementation.

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O2 tries something completely new: Honesty

Crisp
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Honesty, eh?

We can only hope this catches on!

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Netflix plotting move to HTML5 video - but only if DRM works

Crisp
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Re: Tom Melly

Any relation to Roger Melly?

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Crisp
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Re: anti-piracy ads

I've never understood the rationale behind putting anti-piracy ads on legitimate content.

If someone has bought legitimate licensed content, then that is precisely the audience that doesn't need to be inconvenienced with two minutes of nonsense like "You wouldn't download a car would you?".

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Crisp
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Re: DRM Doesn't work

As has been demonstrated by big content providers time and time again.

I'm still sore about the BBC's DRM on their iplayer content. No time shifted viewing of the Royal Institute Christmas Lectures for me! :(

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Anonymous squirts all over NORKS in birthday surprise outrage

Crisp
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Re: "Depicting Kim Jong-un as a pig"

Upvoted just for the Monkey reference.

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Raspberry Pi space jaunt ends in dramatic mountain rescue

Crisp
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Go

Locals bearing flaming torches and pitchforks

Ah! The bane of every mad scientist!

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Ban drones taking snaps of homes, rages Google boss... That's HIS job, right?

Crisp
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Eric Schmidt has demanded tough rules on civilians flying surveillance drones

Screw you.

This is a kite.

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Thatcher’s data protection legacy: Just fill out this 16-page form

Crisp
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I just need to know

Your name, DOB, mothers maiden name, the first line of your address and postcode, and your password, for "Data Protection".

Hang on. You called me. How do I know you are who you say you are?

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P2P badboys The Pirate Bay kicked out of Greenland: Took under 48 hours

Crisp
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Re: why is it illegal?

ThePirateBay is sometimes the only way to recover media for something that you've legitimately bought.

My old copy of Starcraft and Brood Wars still entitles me to play the game, even though the CD's that the game came on died a death a long time ago.

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Under the microscope: The bug that caught PayPal with its pants down

Crisp
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Trollface

A sanitised input? What's that?

At least El Reg sanitises its commentards'";GO;DROP TABLE Students;GO;

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Wales slams Amazon over lack of Kindle support

Crisp
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It's only fair.

There are copies of kindle books in other dead languages

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