Feeds

* Posts by Crisp

2060 posts • joined 16 Jan 2012

New Terminator-style 'bots can self-assemble, leap, climb and SWARM

Crisp
Silver badge
Boffin

Re: Not Terminator

It's ok! We're safe! We're fresh out of Neutronium as far as I can tell.

(We really need a "Don't Panic!" icon)

0
0

Web Daddy Berners-Lee DRMs HTML5 into 2016

Crisp
Silver badge

That seems like a lot of work just to make the internet inconvenient.

Anything that can be seen and heard, can be copied.

7
0

NSA justifies hacking world's digital communications

Crisp
Silver badge

NSA justifies hacking world's digital communications

I read the title, then I read the article.

I failed to see anything in there that justified opening Joe Blogg's mail.

1
0

NSA using Firefox flaw to snoop on Tor users

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: Its Linux so safer

And just how many people out there know how to properly secure a linux box?

0
0
Crisp
Silver badge

Both the NSA and GCHQ run Tor nodes themselves

Any chance of getting them to crank up their bandwidth? Dilbert is loading so slowly here!

0
0

A-D'OH!-BE: Adobe hit by 'sophisticated' MEGA HACK RANSACK

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: "We are not aware of any zero-day exploits targeting any Adobe products."

Why would they be looking? That's a foolhardy course of action!

If you go around looking for 0-day exploits and find them, then you have a responsibility to fix them!

4
0

Mars boffins: You fools! That's no CRATER – it's a SUPER VOLCANO

Crisp
Silver badge

Call that a Super Volcano?

It looks more like a Jackson Pollock.

0
0

Former Microsoftie in AUTOMATIC BEER MAKER funding plea

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: Combine it with a teasmaid

SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY!

1
0
Crisp
Silver badge

The Nescafe of beers.

I don't see it working that well myself. I brew my own beer, and it's already pretty damn simple. Hop syrup, sugar, malt, hot water, yeast, and wait a week. Bottle it, then wait another week.

All that waiting gives the yeast time to turn all that sugar into tasty tasty alcohol, but even more time is needed to let the yeast settle and condition the beer. The yeast need to consume all the micro-nutrients to produce the deep rich flavour of the beer.

I imagine a machine like this producing a kind of artificial drink almost but not quite entirely unlike beer.

8
0

Nielsen-Twitter axis, Facebook to brief TV lords on what online gobshites think of telly

Crisp
Silver badge
Coat

Re: Did they ask about...

Do you have any Payment Protection Insurance?

Ok ok, I'll get my coat...

1
0

CERN releases retro 'Line Mode' browser

Crisp
Silver badge

Hey! Don't knock the CSS box model!

Seriously! Don't! It will probably fall over if you do!

4
0

The LSD trick cyclist, the 1980s pop-star and video games to REPROGRAM YOUR BRAIN

Crisp
Silver badge

This is your brain, this is your brain gaming, this is your brain gaming on drugs...

I'll see your Timothy Leary and raise you a Jeff Minter!

To this day I still get Llamatron flashbacks...

5
0

LIVE, my beauty, LIVE! Nokia revives dead phone with LIGHTNING powered Frankencharger

Crisp
Silver badge

I want one for my house!

I'm going to need a much taller chimney pot though.

0
0

NASA finds use for 3D printers: Launch them into SPAAACE

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: extrusion

From what I've seen in videos, powders tend to clump together in micro-gravity due to electrostatic forces between the individual grains.

Fast, repeatable clumping of solid particles in microgravity.

1
0

Google: Thanks for the billions in revenue, UK. Here are your taxes, that's ... £11m

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: Stop moaning already...

I just phoned David Cameron to tell him just that!

He said "Who are you and how did you get this number?"

2
0

Hundreds of hackers sought for new £500m UK cyber-bomber strike force

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: cybermen

I could get turned into a cyberman? Where do I sign!?!

0
0
Crisp
Silver badge

IT wizards?

It's not magic! Although to the untrained eye it can look like magic.

What exactly is it that Philip Hammond thinks we do?

0
0

Valve aiming to take the joy(sticks) out of gaming with Steam Controller

Crisp
Silver badge

Damn you muscle memory!

I can see my thumbs being all over the place on this device. How is it for accuracy?

With the exception of a few flight sims, I've never been able to find anything more accurate for shooting stuff than WSAD and a mouse.

0
0

NSA in new SHOCK 'can see public data' SCANDAL!

Crisp
Silver badge

I wonder how much NSA spooks get paid to sit on twitter all day...?

Well if I'm going to waste time browsing social media all day, it would be nice to get paid for it!

0
0

US House Republicans: 'End net neutrality or no debt ceiling deal' – report

Crisp
Silver badge

I'm surprised that the Republicans are doing this in public

They are holding america to ransom, and the worst thing is that they don't even seem to see that it reflects badly on them.

4
0

Fresh shift of 'nauts arrives at Space Station, planning torch jaunt

Crisp
Silver badge

Media-friendly Spacewalk for the 2014's winter Olympic Games

I don't think this will erase the stain of Russias gay bashing.

2
0

'Wacky' Spanish VoD squad launches people-picked online vid service in UK

Crisp
Silver badge

Find it hard to choose something to watch?

Then you're probably done watching and it's time to turn off your PC and go and do something a little more interesting.

0
0

Regretful selfie-snapping vixens, lads to get shame-hiding digital burqas

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: What about the right of American employers to avoid hiring drug users?

What right?

Isn't it Unamerican to repress the freedom of other people? What people do on their own time is none of an employers business.

4
2

Latest Snowden reveal: It was GCHQ that hacked Belgian telco giant

Crisp
Silver badge

Damn! I was right!

Neener neener

5
0

Douglas Adams was RIGHT! TINY ALIENS are invading Earth, say boffins

Crisp
Silver badge
Black Helicopters

Conspiracy Theorists

They are going to be all over this.

1
0

Korean stealth-scraper plans will turn 450 metre tower INVISIBLE

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: Too ambitious

You'd need something like a chameleon circuit for that.

0
0
Crisp
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Re: biggest ever TV surely ?

If you got bronzed just for that post, then I support our moderating overlords wisdom wholeheartedly.

1
0

So, Linus Torvalds: Did US spooks demand a backdoor in Linux? 'Yes'

Crisp
Silver badge

You want a secure operating system?

You have to write it yourself nowadays it seems.

0
0

IT bloke denies trying to shag sheep outside football ground

Crisp
Silver badge

"trying to encourage a sheep to perform a sexual act on you"

How would you...? I don't even...

1
0

I, for one, welcome our robotic communist jobless future

Crisp
Silver badge

Often, the solution offered is that we should therefore tax capital more

We don't need to tax capital. What we need to do is raise the tax entry level above the minimum wage.

Seriously, what's the point in spending all that bureaucratic overhead on paying people a wage they can't live on and then taking tax off them only to give some of it back to them in the form of tax credits?

4
0

MPs: This paperless health service plan isn't worth the paper it isn't written on

Crisp
Silver badge

For an extra 5 billion, I could fuck it up in ways that no one has ever thought of before.

3
0
Crisp
Silver badge
Boffin

Re: Er . . .put the civil servant buyers on a bonus system

You've not seen Yes Minister have you?

2
0
Crisp
Silver badge

I'd be willing to bet another £10 billion

That there are a lot of people that have made a lot of money out of this failure.

9
0

Phil Collins' daughter 'will give you A VIRUS' – security bods

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: She's a bigger act than you think...

I wonder how she got the job?

0
0

Life … moves … in … slow … motion … for … little … critters … like … flies

Crisp
Silver badge

Small children are always in a hurry

That's because when you're 5, everything is awesome! You'd be in a hurry too if the entire world was full of really cool stuff you'd never seen before.

2
0

Redmond slips out temporary emergency fix for IE 0-day

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: Why the hell is ActiveX even allowed

HTML 5 is the future.

0
0

Mid East undersea fibre telco hacked: US, UK spooks in spotlight

Crisp
Silver badge

I'm guessing that this was totally legal too

Given GCHQ's definition of legal.

9
1

Pizza drones, mad cyclists and Bitcoin-for-arms traders: A vision of LNDN 2023

Crisp
Silver badge

We will still have to work in the future?

How crap is that?

2
0

How to get a Raspberry Pi to take over your Robot House

Crisp
Silver badge

ROBOT HOUSE!

Cheese it!

It's Dean Vernon!

8
0

French ministers told to use only secure comms post-PRISM

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: Verlan

So basically, Pig Latin for the French?

3
0

Lip-wobbling boffins: Eating Chinese food is like kissing a vibrator

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: Just don't try this at home....

I've heard that you can get "warming" lubricants that have a dash of capsaicin in them...

So I've heard anyway...

0
0

'NSA PRISM spies' shake down victims with bogus child-abuse vids claims

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: Help me Obi Cam Kanobi you're my only hope

If they can erect a massive firewall to protect us from porn...

...Then why can't they construct one to keep out spammers and malware writers?

2
0

Corel re-animates zombie brand for patent case

Crisp
Silver badge

That patent is so vague!

Patent 5,959,633 sounds like half the stuff I build!

1
0

Tell me why I don't like Moon days: Bob Geldof heads into SPAAACE

Crisp
Silver badge

Sir Bob Geldof to go into space

Any word on if he's coming back again?

1
0

Should Nominet ban .uk domains that use paedo and crim-friendly words?

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: I could see banning offensive words,

Why is Jaffa Cake offensive?!?

Did the Goa'uld put in a complaint?

3
0

Intel reveals 14nm PC, declares Moore's Law 'alive and well'

Crisp
Silver badge

14 nm!

How much heat are these chips putting out? I'm thinking that this manufacturing process packs transistors denser, which would translate to the same amount of heat being generated in a smaller space.

0
0

David Attenborough warns that humans have stopped evolving

Crisp
Silver badge

Re: Overpopulation

Human life is already cheap.

Don't believe me? You can get a longer sentence for theft or destruction of property than for murder.

1
0

WAIT! Don't you dare send that ad-spaff email without 'specific' consent

Crisp
Silver badge

"any other form of electronic marketing message"

Here's hoping that includes automated dialers.

3
0

Startup claims 1W wireless charging at 10 metres

Crisp
Silver badge

Tesla would be proud!

Wireless energy transmission, yeah, he thought of that.

1
0

Swiss space plane to launch robotic orbital debris destroyer

Crisp
Silver badge

This looks like an ok solution for large objects

But what about all those nut and bolt sized chunks of metal whizzing around?

I'd have thought it would be easier to dodge a large object coming your way than it would be to avoid a shotgun pellet like smattering of metal.

1
0