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* Posts by TechnicianJack

55 posts • joined 16 Jan 2012

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Apple: iOS7 dayglo Barbie makeover is UNFINISHED - report

TechnicianJack
Unhappy

As a man, I think that the new design has a very feminine colour scheme/look to it. While I don't have an iPhone, I would be unhappy to use a device that looks like this (from any manufacturer). The old design was more of a generic unisex design.

Also, while it is stated that the app logos were not designed by the app team, the Safari logo stands out as looking 'wrong'. It's almost as if someone drew it with Microsoft paint. The compass and stocks designs also look like they don't quite fit in.

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Relax, Hollywood, ARM's got your back: New chip 'thwarts' video pirates

TechnicianJack
Thumb Up

Thanks for the info. I didn't realise the stream would be encrypted.

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TechnicianJack
Pirate

This system could be bypassed easily. My friend records gameplay footage of his Xbox games and uses a 'capture box' which plugs between the Xbox and the TV. Xbox -HDMI- capture box -HDMI- TV. All it does is record the sound/video stream to a hard drive as it passes through the box (In full HD). This would get around the chip stopping the software from reading the video straight from the computer. Admittedly it is extra hardware you need, but then again, the Anon who is ripping the videos is probably going to avoid buying or using hardware with the anti piracy chip in. The only way this system would work is to force manufacturers to include this chip in any graphics hardware they make. This is unlikely to happen (Unless the EU catch wind of the chip), but then you still have the problem that Mr Anon can still use his existing computer without the chip in (Unless you make it illegal to use video hardware without an anti piracy chip).

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CRUNCH: 'Drunk' chap cuffed in high-speed car nookie prang rumpus

TechnicianJack
Thumb Up

Re: IT (Crowd) angle?

Ah, now I see the angle. It was cleverly hidden by the Register's Editors.

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TechnicianJack
IT Angle

An interesting story, but what has this got to do with IT? Unless of course his Ford was one of those out of control cars you hear about being unable to stop, or his female companion was a cyborg.

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Petshop iPad fanboi charged with filming up young model's skirt

TechnicianJack
Boffin

Re: Shoes are the way forward...

I also remember a CSI episode where they catch someone doing this.

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TechnicianJack
Facepalm

How stupid are some people? I know Apple users aren't usually the brightest bunch, but an iPad to film this woman? The largest recording device known to man? The only way to have made it more obvious that you were recording was to have brought a film crew to do it.

I should also point out that I don't condone what this dunce has done.

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Can't find your motor? Apple patents solve car park conundrums

TechnicianJack

Re: Nice start…

I believe this system has already been implemented for cats. There are several systems which you can strap to your cat which have a camera and a GPS module, allowing you to have a cat eye view and track where your cat has been/currently is.

I suppose it's only a matter of time before Apple introduce the iCat tracker (Only works with Black or White cats. Please purchase a £400 compatibility pack if you have any other colour cat).

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iPhone too heavy? Volkswagen brings out motorised ride-on dock

TechnicianJack
Trollface

Re: April fools day way weeks ago.

Task 1,

Purchase the iBeetle without the sales team secretly laughing at you.

Objective failed.

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TechnicianJack

Re: Duh

Something else I just thought of is re-saleability. If you don't have an iPhone, how many of the car's features will you not be able to use?

If this car was to be sold on to another owner, would they have to sell an iPhone with it? Or in several years time would a new owner have to have two phones? An old iPhone to get the car stuff to work, and a new phone to take with them?

Assuming the life span of the average car is about 20 - 30 years before it is no longer roadworthy/scrapped, will people want to have a car that needs a 20 - 30 year old phone to work?

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TechnicianJack

Re: Duh

Maybe the iPhone dock will be a removable/replaceable component? Probably not, seeing as it's an Apple iCar. They'll just expect you to buy the new one when the next iPhone comes out. People will still queue to get it though.

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TechnicianJack

Maps

We can expect lots of iBeetle drivers to get lost while using Apple maps then.

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Apple buys indoor mapper WiFiSLAM

TechnicianJack
Trollface

Apple maps, with WiFiSLAM. Now you can get lost in your own home!

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Playmobil punts bank-heist set to wide-eyed kiddies

TechnicianJack
Happy

Well, it can't be all that bad. The banker getting robbed is still smiling.

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BANG and the server's gone: Man gets 8 months for destroying work computers

TechnicianJack
Mushroom

BANG! And the work is gone.

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NFC SD crew gives up: No one wants our safe bonking tool

TechnicianJack

While it seems a good idea on paper, having an SD card NFC system is a problem. Some phones do not have an SD slot, and phones that do often have a small internal memory as they expect you to put your media and apps on removable storage. People would then have to choose between NFC with their bank details or their media. Seeing as lots of phones have SD cards mounted behind batteries etc, swapping between them would be inconvenient and seeing as some credit/debit cards have NFC built into them, a SD card is almost redundant. (Most people will carry their phone and wallet with their cards in).

Ideally, the phone should have two SD card slots, so users don't have to choose.

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First rigid airship since the Hindenburg enters trials

TechnicianJack

Re: How can this be viable

It's big and slow moving. You could paint it to look like a cloud, and no-one would see it coming!

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New I-hate-my-neighbour stickers to protect Brits' packages

TechnicianJack

Re: The other problem

Get a lockbox which you both know the code to, so you don't have this problem.

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UK electric car funding - another subsidy for the RICH, say MPs

TechnicianJack
Mushroom

Re: Plug in cars ain't green.

Nuclear powered cars? Don't be silly! Haven't you played Fallout?

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Apple admits iCloud 'unacceptable', vows to not go titsup again

TechnicianJack

The usual then.

'It won't happen again'

Until it happens again.

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Valve reiterates games hardware gambit

TechnicianJack
Joke

Steam powered console? Have they not heard of electricity?

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Ghostbusters

TechnicianJack

This ending sequence is an easter egg in the new Ghostbusters game. (Well, it's a couple of years old now). The message is displayed on a computer screen in the fire house.

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Curiosity needs OS upgrade before getting down to science

TechnicianJack
Alert

You did set 'interplanetary space wifi' as the first boot option in the bios, didn't you?

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Google HARVESTS African mobile numbers with Gmail SMS

TechnicianJack
Alert

*Delete*

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Gamer fails STAM roll, dies after 40-hour Diablo III stretch

TechnicianJack
FAIL

Didn't this happen ages ago to a WoW player? Anyway, both people mentioned in the articles should be candidates for Darwin Awards.

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Drones, sub-hunting planes to attack cyber-Chinese army

TechnicianJack

Command and Conquer 5: IRL

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Valve to raise Steam for Ubuntu

TechnicianJack
Thumb Up

Is GLaDOS going open source?

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Sleek new Macs violate fanbois' Retinas with display garbage

TechnicianJack
Trollface

That's not a Mac fault, that's a Reality Distortion Field fault.

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Lego ponders Portal pack

TechnicianJack
Thumb Up

Awesome. What next? A lego mindstorms GLaDOS?

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Web snooping bill an 'odious shopping list of new gov powers'

TechnicianJack
Big Brother

Guilty until proven innocent?

Sounds like it's time to get the old packet radio network going again.

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Apple hardware fixer Bob Mansfield retires from Cupertino

TechnicianJack
Trollface

Re: Hopefully New MacBooks and Othe Apple Products will be Easier to Work On

I hear PC's are easy to work on.

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Mad fan-fitted mouse keeps mitts moisture-free

TechnicianJack
Trollface

Can't say I'm a big FAN of this idea!

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Chrome hits iPhone and iPad, storms to top of download chart

TechnicianJack

I hope it allows more than 8 tabs like safari does. It's irritating when I have 8 tabs open and a pop up window opens and I lose what I was looking at on another tab. Can't wait to get rid of my iPod.

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Google brings HD sneezing pandas to UK: But why?

TechnicianJack
Trollface

'Google also announced a voice-powered BluRay player for launch later in the year.'

So, if you've got a wife, it'll never turn off.

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Mensch pal Bozier defends Menshn security, dubs critics 'snippy geeks'

TechnicianJack
Joke

Re: politics

How can you tell a politician is lying?

Their lips move.

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TechnicianJack

Wouldn't surprise me. Or their servers are connected to a dial up modem.

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TechnicianJack

Just visited their website. It seems really slow.

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Arts & social-sci students briefly forced to do useful work at Foxconn

TechnicianJack
FAIL

No, It's not relevant to your learning, but you better get used to it. These are the sort of menial tasks they will be doing for the rest of their lives with these useless qualifications.

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Girl Geek Dinner lady: The IT Crowd is putting schoolgirls off tech

TechnicianJack
Facepalm

Quotas

More rubbish. It's always about filling quotas/being politically correct etc. There's always people saying there should be more women/ethnic minorities/whatever in companies. This is stupid. People should be employed for their skills and experience, not to meet quotas set by some stupid law or regulation.

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Britain prepares for government by iPad

TechnicianJack
FAIL

I can see this going wrong.

Apple people - iProducts don't get viruses!

Hacker - Oh, all of the UK government are using iPads. Better make a virus.

Make a virus to crash the systems/steal sensitive data. Government collapses.

I suppose it's no different to the current situation. It will just be that the iPad has been hacked and sensitive data has gone missing, rather than the politicians leaving a USB drive on a train, and them losing the data that way.

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Virgin Media cuts Pirate Bay access for millions of punters

TechnicianJack
Alert

One site censored. Not long before:

Google search - Fair labour - no results.

Google search - Democracy - no results.

Google search - Why do I have to wear this orange jump suit? - no results.

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iPad 3 costs Apple 30% more to make than iPad 2

TechnicianJack
Trollface

In Soviet Russia, product taxes company!

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New NASA snap of game developer's electric cart FOUND ON MOON

TechnicianJack

Wasn't there an article on The Register about this a while ago?

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New iPad 4G data connection will only work in America

TechnicianJack
Facepalm

Siri doesn't work outside America, 4G doesn't work outside America, anything else Apple?

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Future car tech

TechnicianJack
Facepalm

I wish manufacturers would stop trying to put idiot sensors in their cars. This just encourages people to drive carelessly, 'Because the computer will save me'. You should be following the car in front at a safe distance. Remember the two second rule? If you do that, you won't need the auto stop system because you shouldn't be tailgating. You should also be paying attention to the road.

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Apple 7.85in 'iPad Mini' on course for Q3 intro

TechnicianJack
Trollface

iPad 2S Lite?

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Jabra Halo 2 Bluetooth headset

TechnicianJack
Trollface

Will it integrate with my SPARTAN armour?

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Huawei pitches 'first ever' 10in quad-core tablet

TechnicianJack

Re: Cost

Probably cheaper than an iPad.

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Nearly one in 10 Brits 'fess to shower phone faux pas

TechnicianJack
FAIL

Title should be '1 in 10 people are idiots.'

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Apple files patent for 'polished meteorite' keyboard

TechnicianJack
Trollface

Lever action keyboard? I wonder how long it will be until Apple try to sue Winchester?

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