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Users are so stupid. Why on earth can't they use Apple products properly?
949 posts • joined 24 Dec 2011
Users are so stupid. Why on earth can't they use Apple products properly?
Apple handsets are now legacy.
You'll see a lot more of this as they try to catch up with Android by attempting to copy, err, sorry, innovate its latest features into their quaint little old handsets - the ones which close users into their AOL-style walled garden as used in days long gone by.
Gosh how things change.
Skeuomorphic design is now about as fashionable as the Bay City Rollers. Market share is falling. The one-size-fits-all handset decision made at the start has come home to roost in spades - this approach so off target you can feel the embarrassing pain of the diehards trying to excuse them next to the S3s and N4s of this world.
And all the while you hear of Android demolishing them in handset sales, about to overtake them in tablets having just matched their share there, and manufacturers using it in fridges, washing machines, cars etc. This just highlights the wisdom of the closed vs open approach greedy Saint Jobs lumbered them with, snobbily turning up his nose at such crudities.
Still, they're currently still making a handsome profit from the remaining iSheep yet to realize what's being done to them, and that's all that matters. Whilst it lasts.
Microsoft can see their irrelevance coming hard and fast. All their thrashing about with smartphones, tablets, back-firing OS releases etc won't change a thing. And the people doing this to them are the very ones they've shat on for the last 20 years, since every area now either snuffing them out directly, or rendering what they do have left irrelevant, is powered by Linux.
It's great they did this, but not so great it wasn't actually their choice. Who really needs to know what I think of the pop factor contestants in order to do business with me? Anyway, I reckon Linked In is the closest thing we'll get to a usable global people directory - ultimately the business "phone book" for the world. Obviously there only needs to be one, so it's no wonder it's doing so well and management want to tread carefully before ruining things the way Facebook did.
Why not just look for anyone who made Games in a Workshop prior to the creation of these Apple wannabees and do them for infringement of their term?
Blackberry will grow by a few percent - that's obvious once the new models arrive in volume. Ordinarily, that wouldn't bother the other players but what's this? Microsoft only have few percent to start with, and as these charts constantly show that's heading South by the quarter. Android isn't going to stop growing. The only sizeable sector left to go for is increasingly dissatisfied iPhone users who don't jump to Android - and up to now, even this tiny minority has only had WP8 to look at.
Not any more :-)
Perhaps its time for another "burning platforms" speech - all Flop has to do is take his first one and cut n paste Symbian for WP8.
Two years ago the British Government gave Ireland $8bn, and I mean gave - there's now no requirement for it to be paid back.
The Right Honorable Jacqui Smith - Britains first female Home Secretary - fiddled £100k and merely had to issue a pretend apology to her fellow MP's during the great corruption exposure a couple of years back. After agreeing to such a demanding act of contrition, they allowed her to keep the loot. She did lose her job though, more likely because of the embarrassment the porn she charged to the taxpayer caused than the real crime. Anyway, just shows the British justice system for what it is when you hear of others caught doing the same thing (3 people, £300k) - porridge for you lads, with no early kid gloves release of the kind Chris Huhne is about to get.
For Christs sake Apple get with the plot - you're not top dog anymore and it really is time to Think Different, if you can. That means your pathetic lawsuit days are over - including trying to trademark how ever the fuck you lay out your stores.
By the way, hows that thermonuclear thing working out for you?
Android demolished Apple in smartphone sales for 2012, and this is their response.
It won't affect Androids' market share a jot, but I think it'll take a hearty helping of Apples lunch and certainly keep Win8's anonymous entry in the "1% others" section of all the market share charts for the coming year.
The iSheep are starting to see what you've been doing to them all these years.
Just as I was about to convert too, having been persuaded by all that marketing spend.
For those living under a rock for the last 30 years, this is known as "The Microsoft Effect".
What follows is job losses, shit products, loss of market share and previously loyal customers suddenly hating you before inevitably you go bust and history records you forever as just another of Microsofts bitches. Mysteriously, however, the top brass who's palm was greased with silver over the original deal always seem to do very well out of it..
But now Mr Bean is in charge all will be well again.
Please, someone, anyone - write something for this turkey ... anything, even fart apps will do.
Come to think of it, why is there no "yawn" icon?
Right there in the palm of your hand.
WP8 has shockingly tiny sales figures - it's entirely possible a Ubuntu handset would outsell it. And wouldn't that be lovely - it might even get Nokias attention, since as soon as that looked remotely possible Blamer and his trojan Flop would have both been given the boot by then, and an alternative would be needed.
Actually ... hey now there's a funny thing ... why suddenly the announcement of all these alternative mobile OS's - Tizen/Ubuntu/FirefoxOS etc? It's almost as if these are waiting for someone big to announce a major change in direction...
And so it begins.
Look at these two ugly bastards:
Between them is a pair of loser CEOs.
I wonder if he was behind this:
"Microsoft's campus in Mountain View is presumably loaded with Microsoft's latest and greatest products, but a thief decided to steal five Apple iPads from the company's offices instead"
One can imagine the burglar skillfully swerving the mountains of unsold surface tablets, WP8 handsets and heaps of returned Windows 8 DVD's looking for decent kit, and finding all the Android gear was at home, since that's what the staff use personally, was then forced to take just what they could resell.
"I noticed you pushed the big red button. Your system now needs rebooting, so these changes can come into effect."
And in 2014 s/Tizen/Ubuntu etc, not bothering the serious mobile players a jot. It will, however. cause all these novelties to be lumped along with microsoft in the "others" section of every market share report for the next few years - the sub 5% aggregate generally considered floor noise.
Someone has a twisted sense of humour.
Apple peaked in the middle of last year. We're now in a free-for-all as everyone at last sees the emperor has no clothes, and are beginning to stick it to them for realizing how they've actually been cheated all these years.
This need repeating.
Ballmer called Linux a “cancer”
Microsoft apologists really, really want that to be somehow erased from everyone's memory, and never appear in the same sentence as Windows 8 whilst they are running a multi million pound advertising campaign for it.
See what I did there ?
And in a year or two, you'll be seeing iOS supporting multiple users, NFC, wireless charging etc the way Android does today.
We'll also witness the familiar drama of these features going from "not being needed by anyone" whilst not present on the iSheeps favorite toy, to "fantastic innovations" when they do finally appear right up to "Exhibit A, m'lud" as Apple starts trying to wipe out those it copied from, err whoops that should be "takes legal action to protect its innovations".
The markets think so to:
Is there some "head of scheduling management" top boss who refused to sign a letter of apology?
Will there be a 1 line "sorry" sentence in the British newspapers in 1pt scribble, surrounded by 96pt "Apple are great and can take this piss out of the British legal system all they want ner ner-ne-ner ner" text?
"They should concentrate on putting a retina screen in the mini ipad"
I dunno, watching your movies the minecraft way has a certain kind of retro appeal - all those mario style blocky pixels and gaudy colors certainly do it for the die hard fanbois. Perfection is, after all, anything with an apple logo on it.
There's one for certain claiming that last one was just another a Balls up, but have no fear - we will remember. Could it be the same person admiring another mans fake buttocks whilst wearing a Nazi outfit in this photo? I think there is a worrying pattern here regarding this loathsome individual and his attitude to our fallen. Still, at least he knew how to spend our money when he had the one and only chance he'll ever get.
This is all bollocks - it's obvious where the gullible publics money has gone. Moats don't clean themselves, you know, and the last time I checked there was no such thing as a free duck houses, cable tv porn or poppies to lay at the remembrance services of those who gave their lives fighting to give our noble, honest and trustworthy MP's the freedoms they now enjoy.
It is financially, but there are many like me who would just like to add their voice to the good chuckle everyone is having at the fanbois embarrassment - yet another in the avalanche set to grow throughout 2013 as more and more of their desperate patents get overturned.
Chip chip chip till the damn bursts, I reckon. It's a smart move - go back to the original patents one by one to get them struck off, then the subsequent court cases are a no brainer to overturn: Apples worst nightmare, in effect, just at the time it's plumb out of innovation and the courts take a dump on any of their future trivial round corner jokes.
7. Innocent members of the public who felt like a Chinese take away and ended up nearly drowning: http://goo.gl/8gMYw
Apple's very first act - before it had any products - was to copy. It took its name from the Beatles record label, then spent the rest of its existence basically polishing existing tech into a form just enough to fool those who prefer style over substance. This thou-shalt-not-copy hypocrisy was baked into its DNA from the start, and its legal antics are just the obvious extension of this - a smokescreen thrown up to try to disguise this fact. Now they are rumbled, and there is literally NOTHING they can put in any future products that a competitor hasn't done already, that little boy's voice is becoming the roar of the crowd.
Apples' peak coincided with Steve jobs death, but were he around today he'd not have been able to stop the rot.
"microsoft should have never bailed them out"
Samsung don't think so - it's the best thing that could have happened to them. Look at their runaway Android market share, and consider what it would have been had Nokia done the smart thing and gone with Android. Now, it would have been almost certainly a 50/50 split between the two. The official reason they didn't? There was "no way" to differentiate handset models if you run with Android, unlike the infinitely customisable WP8, which looks so different across all its various handset models, why, you can hardly tell its WP8 at all.
And then, just as the great man had proudly walked by to the fawning cries of "ooh' and "aah" from the sycophantic crowd, a small boys' voice was heard by everyone: "but the emperor has no clothes on!"
Read this and think how much iPads ect really fleece the iSheep: Are display devices becoming like light bulbs?
Stephen Elop surely? He was Microsofts 8th largest shareholder when Blamer concocted his last-gasp desperate attempt for some kind of relevance in mobile, and set him on his mission to infiltrate Nokia. Clearly doomed to failure from the start, his only success is in dragging Nokia down with them, but he'll naturally be very well compensated when he gets the boot.