644 posts • joined Saturday 24th December 2011 20:17 GMT
Re: The MAGIC rotting MOBILE CORPSE of Microsoft
Blackberry will grow by a few percent - that's obvious once the new models arrive in volume. Ordinarily, that wouldn't bother the other players but what's this? Microsoft only have few percent to start with, and as these charts constantly show that's heading South by the quarter. Android isn't going to stop growing. The only sizeable sector left to go for is increasingly dissatisfied iPhone users who don't jump to Android - and up to now, even this tiny minority has only had WP8 to look at.
Not any more :-)
Re: Unsurprising really..
Perhaps its time for another "burning platforms" speech - all Flop has to do is take his first one and cut n paste Symbian for WP8.
Re: 3 out of 1000's
The Right Honorable Jacqui Smith - Britains first female Home Secretary - fiddled £100k and merely had to issue a pretend apology to her fellow MP's during the great corruption exposure a couple of years back. After agreeing to such a demanding act of contrition, they allowed her to keep the loot. She did lose her job though, more likely because of the embarrassment the porn she charged to the taxpayer caused than the real crime. Anyway, just shows the British justice system for what it is when you hear of others caught doing the same thing (3 people, £300k) - porridge for you lads, with no early kid gloves release of the kind Chris Huhne is about to get.
Microsoft 'touches 16k shop workers' to polish their turd hard
Mythbusters show the way.
You're barging in wrong
For Christs sake Apple get with the plot - you're not top dog anymore and it really is time to Think Different, if you can. That means your pathetic lawsuit days are over - including trying to trademark how ever the fuck you lay out your stores.
By the way, hows that thermonuclear thing working out for you?
"Thinking different" at its finest
Android demolished Apple in smartphone sales for 2012, and this is their response.
Re: I hope they make it
It won't affect Androids' market share a jot, but I think it'll take a hearty helping of Apples lunch and certainly keep Win8's anonymous entry in the "1% others" section of all the market share charts for the coming year.
You're polishing the turd wrong
The iSheep are starting to see what you've been doing to them all these years.
I take offense
At the one which shows you with your tongue lolling out the side of your mouth, your eyes spinning in different direction and dribble seeping down your chin, but fortunately there's not much call for the "make me a WP8 user" app - or is there?
Just as I was about to convert too, having been persuaded by all that marketing spend.
Re: Nokia to align IT function with its business focus
For those living under a rock for the last 30 years, this is known as "The Microsoft Effect".
What follows is job losses, shit products, loss of market share and previously loyal customers suddenly hating you before inevitably you go bust and history records you forever as just another of Microsofts bitches. Mysteriously, however, the top brass who's palm was greased with silver over the original deal always seem to do very well out of it..
You can smell the desperation
Please, someone, anyone - write something for this turkey ... anything, even fart apps will do.
Come to think of it, why is there no "yawn" icon?
Right there in the palm of your hand.
Almost forgot - well, as did everyone else to be honest, Windows RT - that was quick, nice knowing you :-)
Re: Cant stand microsoft, because...
WP8 has shockingly tiny sales figures - it's entirely possible a Ubuntu handset would outsell it. And wouldn't that be lovely - it might even get Nokias attention, since as soon as that looked remotely possible Blamer and his trojan Flop would have both been given the boot by then, and an alternative would be needed.
Actually ... hey now there's a funny thing ... why suddenly the announcement of all these alternative mobile OS's - Tizen/Ubuntu/FirefoxOS etc? It's almost as if these are waiting for someone big to announce a major change in direction...
Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".
Look at these two ugly bastards:
Between them is a pair of loser CEOs.
Re: "without adequate explanation"
I wonder if he was behind this:
"Microsoft's campus in Mountain View is presumably loaded with Microsoft's latest and greatest products, but a thief decided to steal five Apple iPads from the company's offices instead"
One can imagine the burglar skillfully swerving the mountains of unsold surface tablets, WP8 handsets and heaps of returned Windows 8 DVD's looking for decent kit, and finding all the Android gear was at home, since that's what the staff use personally, was then forced to take just what they could resell.
And in 2014 s/Tizen/Ubuntu etc, not bothering the serious mobile players a jot. It will, however. cause all these novelties to be lumped along with microsoft in the "others" section of every market share report for the next few years - the sub 5% aggregate generally considered floor noise.
"Vomiting Larry" huh? Just as Google gets off another monopolies rap
Someone has a twisted sense of humour.
Drip drip drip till the dam bursts
Apple peaked in the middle of last year. We're now in a free-for-all as everyone at last sees the emperor has no clothes, and are beginning to stick it to them for realizing how they've actually been cheated all these years.
"Hi! I'm Clippy! It looks like you want to launch some nukes".
"I noticed you pushed the big red button. Your system now needs rebooting, so these changes can come into effect."
Ballmer called Linux a “cancer”
This need repeating.
Ballmer called Linux a “cancer”
Microsoft apologists really, really want that to be somehow erased from everyone's memory, and never appear in the same sentence as Windows 8 whilst they are running a multi million pound advertising campaign for it.
See what I did there ?
And in a year or two, you'll be seeing iOS supporting multiple users, NFC, wireless charging etc the way Android does today.
We'll also witness the familiar drama of these features going from "not being needed by anyone" whilst not present on the iSheeps favorite toy, to "fantastic innovations" when they do finally appear right up to "Exhibit A, m'lud" as Apple starts trying to wipe out those it copied from, err whoops that should be "takes legal action to protect its innovations".
The markets think so to:
So who resigned this time?
Is there some "head of scheduling management" top boss who refused to sign a letter of apology?
Will there be a 1 line "sorry" sentence in the British newspapers in 1pt scribble, surrounded by 96pt "Apple are great and can take this piss out of the British legal system all they want ner ner-ne-ner ner" text?
"They should concentrate on putting a retina screen in the mini ipad"
I dunno, watching your movies the minecraft way has a certain kind of retro appeal - all those mario style blocky pixels and gaudy colors certainly do it for the die hard fanbois. Perfection is, after all, anything with an apple logo on it.
Re: This is news?????
There's one for certain claiming that last one was just another a Balls up, but have no fear - we will remember. Could it be the same person admiring another mans fake buttocks whilst wearing a Nazi outfit in this photo? I think there is a worrying pattern here regarding this loathsome individual and his attitude to our fallen. Still, at least he knew how to spend our money when he had the one and only chance he'll ever get.
Re: Microsoft Win 8 - Failware
Here's a helpful Windows surface video for anyone unaware of what all the fuss is about, and the perils that befall those who cross Blamer: Surface presentation epic fail
Re: Microsoft Win 8 - Failware
Here's a helpful Win 8 video for anyone unaware of what all the fuss is about: Windows 8: The Animated Evaluation
It is financially, but there are many like me who would just like to add their voice to the good chuckle everyone is having at the fanbois embarrassment - yet another in the avalanche set to grow throughout 2013 as more and more of their desperate patents get overturned.
Chip chip chip till the damn bursts, I reckon. It's a smart move - go back to the original patents one by one to get them struck off, then the subsequent court cases are a no brainer to overturn: Apples worst nightmare, in effect, just at the time it's plumb out of innovation and the courts take a dump on any of their future trivial round corner jokes.
Re: This is news?????
This is all bollocks - it's obvious where the gullible publics money has gone. Moats don't clean themselves, you know, and the last time I checked there was no such thing as a free duck houses, cable tv porn or poppies to lay at the remembrance services of those who gave their lives fighting to give our noble, honest and trustworthy MP's the freedoms they now enjoy.
Apple's very first act - before it had any products - was to copy. It took its name from the Beatles record label, then spent the rest of its existence basically polishing existing tech into a form just enough to fool those who prefer style over substance. This thou-shalt-not-copy hypocrisy was baked into its DNA from the start, and its legal antics are just the obvious extension of this - a smokescreen thrown up to try to disguise this fact. Now they are rumbled, and there is literally NOTHING they can put in any future products that a competitor hasn't done already, that little boy's voice is becoming the roar of the crowd.
Apples' peak coincided with Steve jobs death, but were he around today he'd not have been able to stop the rot.
"microsoft should have never bailed them out"
Samsung don't think so - it's the best thing that could have happened to them. Look at their runaway Android market share, and consider what it would have been had Nokia done the smart thing and gone with Android. Now, it would have been almost certainly a 50/50 split between the two. The official reason they didn't? There was "no way" to differentiate handset models if you run with Android, unlike the infinitely customisable WP8, which looks so different across all its various handset models, why, you can hardly tell its WP8 at all.
And then, just as the great man had proudly walked by to the fawning cries of "ooh' and "aah" from the sycophantic crowd, a small boys' voice was heard by everyone: "but the emperor has no clothes on!"
Read this and think how much iPads ect really fleece the iSheep: Are display devices becoming like light bulbs?
Stephen Elop surely? He was Microsofts 8th largest shareholder when Blamer concocted his last-gasp desperate attempt for some kind of relevance in mobile, and set him on his mission to infiltrate Nokia. Clearly doomed to failure from the start, his only success is in dragging Nokia down with them, but he'll naturally be very well compensated when he gets the boot.
Is it just me, or does it really seem everywhere you look these days more and more people are taking the piss out of Apple?
Time for Plan C.
Plan A - Copy, then rest on laurels having fleeced the lower IQ segment of the market
Plan B - Sue anyone who, err, you can pay American courts enough to run with your ludicruous "they copied us" claims (extending Plan A)
Plan C - Genuine innovation
In other words they are toast :-)
Re: Still won't make METRO fly
Come 'ed, wack, why not go all the way and do a scouse one?
Consumer reports say you're best to swerve it, no matter what the language
Another of the imminent torrent of "Windows 8 is shite" reports: