1102 posts • joined 24 Dec 2011
Tee hee, snigger snigger, chortle chortle
"Windows Phone 8 might offer some tie-ins with HP's desktop portfolio, but if you're looking to make a splash in the smartphone arena it's better to use an OS people actually want to buy."
Re: But... but...
Microsoft are in the mobile space?
Why hasn't anyone heard of this - you 'd have thought with all the windows users out there there would be some level of interest.
IWatched Sony, Pebble I'm watch etc
Then as usual decided it's about time to catch up, err innovate one so I can get on with my real business of filing lawsuits against those who dared innovate them before me.
Aren't Apple about to innovate one of these any year now?
We'll see one as soon as the photocopiers in Cupertino have been replaced - they were worn out after the hammering they got making iOS7. Well, Android ICS has been out for two years now, so that's a hell of a lot of innovatin' to catch up on.
"Apple said to dump Google Maps for its own internally developed solution"
Hmm, how'd that work out for you then?
Is this like some wierd countries drug/porn/weapons laws where it's legal to own or sell them but illegal to use them? This has been in Android since Gingerbread (2.3) yet Apple dare not, for some inexplicable reason, try their asshat rounded corner bullying shit with Google.
Let's lighten the mood a little by remembering the hilarious embarrassment we all enjoyed when Apple had to apologize in the British Press for pulling exactly this kind of stunt there. Oh but wait... then there was one more thing. They had to think different and apologize again when they were told they were apologizing wrong. Now *that's* genius.
Whereas Apple maps has it in a car park in Grimsby?
"Siri, Apple Maps are clearly a vastly inferior attempt to copy what Google does best. Have you any suggestions regarding what we could do for IOS7 in a similar vein?"
Re: Oh you gotta be kidding....
Once again, the most important feature in all this - who is *really* behind SCO - is totally left out. There's so much FUD involved it's enough to make you want to throw your chair across the room and bury someone.
And iOS9, due in 2 years, will have the features of Android 4.2, out last year
It's all so tediously predictable.
It'll just be the usual Apple catchup fest we've seen in their last few handsets
Now they've had time to photocopy the flat icons from Androids ICS of 2 years ago, its suddenly their newest, greatest innovation.
As will be NFC, which miraculously transformed itself from being something their users "don't need" when only the competition had it, to another of their stunning breakthroughs essential to every smartphone from now on.
Windows - now that *is* a name from the past...
Thanks for the reminder - it's always fascinating taking a trip down memory lane. Also, few people outside Redmond are aware Microsoft once attempted to break into the mobile market, but unfortunately failed miserably, so this historical footnote is also of minor interest too.
"The company’s reliance on Facebook for revenue"
Re: More lipstick...
"Have you loaded Linux onto your iPad?"
Genuine question - since that device is only designed for the primitive one-thing-at-a-time kind of operation seen in legacy systems from years ago, is its hardware even capable of the kind of multitasking a modern OS like Linux offers?
Redmond orders turd polish by the tankerful
But it's still not enough.
It's nice to see their new official Windows 8.1 line though - "It's like having a ping pong bat shoved up your ass while you try to get on with your work.".
Re: I can hardly believe
"Haha don't make me laugh."
Well, I'm reminded of the reply Russell Brand got after him and Woss made their obscene phone call prank and he said "All I ever wanted to do was make people laugh".
Reply: "Well Russell, any time you're ready to start".
Same with Microsoft. When they do get round to launching something other than a comedy burning platform, we'll see if its any use.
Re: I can hardly believe
Microsoft have some kind of mobile phone out? Why doesn't anyone know about this?
Re: Amen to that
Microsoft sends its sincere thanks to you and all their other beta testers for helping them fleece you each time you thought you were being such a heroic trailblazer.
2013: Microsoft's year of hell rolling along nicely I see
I'm quite enjoying watching this slow car crash in a schadenfreude kind of way.
Re: When did Apple patent "being better than Apple"?
The S3 is a generation ahead of the iPhone5. The S4 is two.
2 words regarding this famous Microsoft compatibility:
Re: What? I only heard Neil.
That read to me the way a man who has been forced by some Blamer to go out to the press and polish a turd, even though the very thought disgusts him and he knows instinctively he's onto a loser.
It wouldn't surprise me to find out there actually was a totally compatible Android hardware layer underneath all this. Once the shareholders see sense, as they appear to be doing recently, Android handsets will then just be a case of applying decent software to the great hardware Nokia is known for plus some case retooling.
Clearly, Elop is standing on a burning platform now so hasn't that long to go.
Re: So Fugly it's mother would feed it with a catapult
Can it be flashed with Android? But then you'd have to scrape off the mark-of-the-retard Windows logo.
Anyway, at this rate it's not just that which foghorns its owner as an embarrassing loser - unless they act fast, the very word Nokia alone will, too.
Re: But for modern smartphones only, natch.
Cheers. These small details may appear unimportant, but nanny must constantly point them out lest the reader not understand the full meaning of the sentence. And we all know how much happier some smartphone users are when being nannied.
But for modern smartphones only, natch.
Nothing NFC is applicable to quaint tiny-screened models whos design has hardly changed for 5 years, no matter how round their corners, since "they don't need that".
Until it's added that is, then its "their innovation" and they'll see you in a court they bought.
Re: We told you it was shit
And Blamer *still* has his job? Are the shareholders all retards?
Re: Why don't they just throw in the towel?
Oh look, an Anonymous Coward seems to be ignoring the fact the largest, most successful Patent Troll in the world is once again doing what they are best at and ignored the elephant in the room.
Why don't they just throw in the towel?
Give up software microsoft - you're shit at it. Stick to extorting $5-$15 per device from those who get it right.
Whilst you can.
Quite catchy, accurate and goes down really well in Redmond.
BT knows best
Hmmmm, O2 eh? A partnership, Hmmm. What could they call it? Mmm, O2 ... lets see, oh I can't be bothered, lets just go with that then shall we MMO2. Yes, great name that - a real first in technical excellence, and a great testament to BT's vision for the future.
MMO2. Oh, wait ...
Ahh tabs - Didn't think it would take long before they "invented" them
Round corners, slide to unlock, pages which (gasp!) turn. Add tabs to that list of marvelous innovations the human race was lost in the wilderness before the genuises at Apple concocted in their labs.
The sickening stench of The Beast is everywhere
Compare and contrast.
This case, where microsoft use Motorola tech:
Judge: "Yup, you're guilty of infringement. Hold out your wrist whilst we lightly brush it with a feather as punishment."
Android, where no one knows what tech alleged infringers use because microsofts bully boys threaten all kinds of pain if they even hint at going to court: "That's $5-$15 per device then, please".
The only hope is when it does finally get to court, the extortionists lose and have to repay every penny they fleeced from their victims over the years, and then some. Hell, yeah! All they'll have left in mobile is their hated bright yellow comedy phone, the shareholders will have long given Elop the boot and the hints at Android kit we're seeing now will be in full swing. Minus any royalties to the bastards, natch.
Android is microsofts largest mobile revenue stream by miles so they don't give a fuck what users do with them.
You're copying it wrong
Will they have to issue an apology in the press, then hilariously issue another for apologising wrong the first time? Hey, haven't we been here before?
Re: could have been worse
Ahem - you mean pulled down his trousers and excreted a Windows 8 handset on the floor. But then again, how would anyone tell the difference?
Re: Steve Blamer offends millions of Windows users
Nah, Eadon would have said welcome to Microsofts new R&D dept, where Blamer shoved his hand down the back of his trousers, rummaged, squeezed and grunted for a while before popping out a Windows 8 handset and a puppet, both of which he then sent over to Nokia telling them to get on with it.
Steve Blamer offends millions of Windows users
By sticking unusable new Windows "upgrade" down their throats, too.
Someone noticed it was a batch that had not really changed much in 5 years?