Re: Relying on subcontractor self-assessments
I'd hope they were following rule #1:
Never take parts for in house testing from the top layers in the box.
2111 posts • joined 16 Jun 2007
I'd hope they were following rule #1:
Never take parts for in house testing from the top layers in the box.
"are Microsoft going to refund his £5?"
Yes. He can expect the check about the time Satan needs earmuffs and a wooly scarf.
"folks investigate the new Tesla GPUs fro jobs other than VDI."
Aaand now I'm envisioning video cards with bushy black wigs.
(I know, I know, corrections button. But there's none on the mobile site.)
No! More to the left,little buddy, move left, and hurry! That back itch is driving me crazy!
What's the difference between lawyers and prostitutes?
A prostitute will screw you if you pay them.
A lawyer will screw anybody else if you pay them.
"Robert, when measuring things in terms of Manhattans, one should use a standard cocktail glass."
"See, that's the sort of thing that results in space probes crashing into the sides of planets: mixing units of volume with units of area. Here, have one on me for spotting that."
But it was an area of volume; The area of Manhattan, 300 feet deep.
*sip* That's a lot of Manhattans!
land area of Manhattan - 59.1 square kilometres
Manhattan cocktail glass - 4.5oz - 0.0001 metre cubed
(Looks at numbers, has mild panic attack)
59100 * 300 = 1730000 / 0.0001 = *Error, limit of liver exceeded!* er, 1,730,000,000 Manhattan Cocktails
DAMN! That's a lot of cocktails!
Caveat: The above was done by a dyscalculiac with a phone app, accuracy not guaranteed.
"Protecting our consumers’ privacy is our top priority, and we work hard every day to safeguard our valued Samsung users.”
If that was true, they'd have done the proper testing to ensure glaring mistakes like this weren't in the product before it went to market.
The real message is: "Protecting our profit is our top priority, and we work hard every day to safeguard our valued Samsung brand. So, here's some feelgood bullshit to placate our consumers.”
"Free advice: With all due respect to the fairer gender, girls typically get thicker with age (as do we all, to some degree). So you have to, ahem, 'lead your target'."
/sarcasm And worth every penny paid for it /sarcasm
"Please excuse the indelicate nature of the topic."
"Did you drop it many times, was the battery too hot, or was the back made from paper that you exposed to heavy rain?"
Probably similar to me, dependable phone, does what I need after nearly eight years of use*, and sees no need to change it.
*Had a nice chat* with the provider about four years ago, when they tried to discontinue service due to it being an old model, no other problems since.
**No, really! Rather surprising.
"Consumers are waiting for glutten free PCs?"
"Gluten free, privacy free, it's all the same to the masses, innit?" - says an anonymous west coast source.
(Yes, it's sarcasm, for those too jaded to notice.)
-Its because they have to spread the revenues on the software licenses so as they grow they will still be showing losses - they are generating net cash so they aren't losing money. Its normal for growth license businesses to not show a massive amount of bottom line movement but they can still be net cash generating-
Tricksy, tricksy beancounters! Gollum hates them, Gollum hates them forever!
"Duh! Look around you. See any gods?"
Look! Look right here, an image of Christ on a tortilla!
No... wait a minute, that's Willy Nelson... Nevermind...
-Can you sue someone for having lax security in this area? When even the most secure organizations are susceptible to betrayal from the inside?
If you disagree, consider the name "Snowden".-
Yes, But... A company that refused to delete sensitive information, even when paid to do just that?
Class action Lawsuit's already started, led by a widower:
"About 0.001% of Internet searches?"
99% of which are "Blobbo Baggins and his inflatable friend"
[link to link about post]
Obviously, the only way to be sure that Google will never provide any link to Blobbo's indiscretion ever is:
if search.query contains "Blobbo Boggins", then return "No results found".
Huzzah! We're on our way to creating "non persons"!
"And reduce the functionality of your PC as soon as you go to Linux....."
Well, yes, If by "reduce the functionality of your PC", you mean "severely hamper others from using your PC to monitor you."
"hell, any actual interesting or useful content left on there is pretty much drowned out by all the friggin' bullshit."
You've pretty much just described all media, haven't you?
"In fact I think I'm going to order some packing supplies and then film an unboxing."
Still not as bad as a cartoon character, badly drawn in MS Paint, repeating some tired meme over and over in a ten hour loop while masturbating.
(My remaining vestiges of humanity prevent me from providing a link. Google at your own peril.)
-"persons of the contradictory gender." You mean the distaff side.-
Well I was going to question whether computer sciences needs more naysayers of either sex, but that works too.
Well since they all seem to get used to put in backdoors, how about a Framer of Flaws?
-Something else identified with Google. A beta of flaws, a hipster of flaws?-
Flaws+ of flaws? Naw... <ponders>... <inspiration!> Smedley, drumroll please!
A Corporation of flaws! Neat, and succinct.
Upvoted for the laugh, but no, single.
Pro tip: You're more likely to score at the supermarket or laundromat than you are at a pub or online.
You'd be surprised by how many rather good looking women have almost no social life.
Plus, it's not possible to know about all the sites (and more coming online every week), unless you're the living embodiment of Leisure Suit Larry.
Until the news of the hack, I'd never heard of the site.
"Seriously, go back 99 years and see how many tech companies from then are still going now."
The Computing-Tabulating-Recording Company - founded June 16, 1911. They later changed their name to the International Business Company, IE: IBM
Bell Telephone Company, a common law joint stock company, was organized in Boston, Massachusetts on July 9, 1877
New York and Mississippi Valley Printing Telegraph Company merged with New York & Western Union Telegraph Company in 1856 to become Western Union
Edison General Electric Company which was incorporated in New York on April 24, 1889, later shortened the name to General Electric
It's amazing how long some companies have been around, gobbling up the competition.
-The brain is at the same stage of development as a five-week-old fetus and contains 99 per cent of the same cells that you'd find in an in-utero equivalent.-
Plus totally sensory deprived. Still probably smarter than most politicians.
"Kill The US Patent and Trademark Office (USPTO)."
A bit extreme, and what's to say that what replaces it won't be worse?
Simple fix: A handling fee, based on the company's/individual's net worth, that gets refunded if the patent is approved. If not, the USPTO adds it to the budget.
Now, how often do you think they'll approve a patent from US Megacorp if it means refunding a multi million dollar handling fee?
And how long before someone makes an app/gizmo that monitors the handshake between PC and bracelet, then fakes the bracelet when you're away?
"Redmond's new Edge browser is not impacted."
I wonder why?
Not that I actually believe that, but it does hint that there might be a "Vulnerability? What vulnerability?", as the updates silently churn in the background, type scenario coming.
"Leyden jars all the way for me."
Trusted, reliable tech.
The only downside is the cat going bald from all the rubbing with a wool sock to keep them charged.
-"Laws specifically prevent it", namely the Computer Misuse act or your local equivalent.-
Funny old world, innit?
Remotely removing malware, bots and viruses without permission violates the law.
But Microsoft, Google, Amazon, Sony, a million ad peddlers, and any Five Eyes Agency can install, remove, delete, or alter any part of your system without permission, and it's all legal.
Worst they get is bad publicity when caught being blatant about it.
"What? If you want your site to be found by interested parties, 'vanishing' it in search machines doesn't quite make sense."
You know how it used to be done before Google 'sanitised' the web?
Link pages and web rings.
If you were interested in something, and found a site, it was always linked to other sites by these to other, similar sites.
The web was more of a community back then, instead of monetised virtual real estate.
Try joining a web ring* or putting a link page on your site these days, and count the minutes before Google smacks you down.
*Yes, they still exist. Not every site is a slave to Google.
Bland, soft, cloying, unsubstantial, can't take the heat without falling apart, and easy to poke holes in.
Is Google trying to tell us something?
In the near future, I expect Amazon and Walmart will merge under that name.
Or just get Gumby's dad and a ladder truck: https://youtu.be/wt87rvCPViQ
Now, now, you have to admire the sense of humor of a $DEITY that arranged the laws of an entire universe just so the slower traffic is always ahead of you, and the faster traffic behind you, whenever you venture out on the road.
"So he wants Ofcom to send some poor sucker out to cover the entire land area of the UK, cities, villages, fields, mountains, swamps and all, stopping every 100 metres, to measure the actual reception on every network? The phrase 'job for life' springs to mind..."
Odd, to me, the phrase "Can you hear me now?" sprang to mind.
" So Apple are doing the right thing
for the customers and replacing the potentially faulty units.
No class action lawsuit.
Hardly news is it then?"
What makes this news is that Apple has a bit of a reputation for ignoring faults in its devices until the spectre of a class action suit is raised. "Holding it wrong" ring a bell?
So Apple doing the right thing without coercion is newsworthy.
"I shouldn't have to point out things like Typhoon Soudelor or the tsunami that caused the disaster at Fukushima"
Not to mention, take the entire nuclear arsenal of mankind, then compare it to the rather mediocre (In Nature's terms) nuclear detonation our world has been orbiting for a few billion years.
-"for residential use only" in hopes of keeping them tucked safely away from scientific research equipment.-
More fun if they carried the warning in big red letters:
"DO NOT USE NEAR RADIO TELESCOPES - BECAUSE ALIENS!"
It'd certainly make the conspiracy forums even more entertaining. :)
"Dont be a silly sod. The language people use sometimes is so over the top."
A more liberated female would have just tweeted the pic captioned, "OMG! Look at the teeny tiny wienie! It's MICROSCOPIC!"
"Obviously no self-respecting trrrst would use his real name when buying online,"
Pick the likeliest scenario:
At Megaware's online software store:
"Hello, My name is Abdul Akabar, noted terrorist. I would like to order this restricted highly sensitive software. Please send it to 120 Bombed out Lane, Hot Spot, Middle East. My credit card number is... "
Or on IRC:
"Dude, 4k484R here, Where can I get a torrent for Restricted Software?"
This crap only makes life harder for normal guys, and amuses the miscreants.
"As for the "killer-app", I think they believe it's Cortana and Universal."
When I read this, and the truth of it hit, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
So I laughed until I cried, Twice!
It also explains Windows RT. The RT stands for "Rubber Todger"
"Even so, if you can get away with "david9" on a .mil or .gov account then we're all completely, oh what's the technical term? AH yes, completely fucked."
Tell that to Gary McKinnon, he could use a laugh.
"Google knows more about you than your mother does."
"Everytime you go online, an advertiser is listening."
"If you won't tell it to strangers in public, why the Hell do you post it on Facebook?"
Maybe I should write a book?