* Posts by Steve Cook

5 posts • joined 15 Jun 2007

Join the army, get your ID pinched - MoD laptop goes AWOL

Steve Cook

Not the first time...

Back when we were prepping ourselves for the invasion of the falkland islands, the MoD lost a laptop then aswell.

This one also contained vital information, THE invasion plans! A massive police search went out looking for the guy that nicked it from the backseat of a car.

The police officer who arrived to question the chap who'd had the laptop on the backseat asked;

"Is there anyone we should notify?"

"Yeah... I think the prime minister should know."

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Stolen satnav guides thieves to owner's home

Steve Cook

Lacking Commoon Sense

The thief first broke into a car and stole the satnav. Then thought it wise to journey to the victims home and then steal a car parked on the drive just to dump it somewhere - perhaps as an inconvienence?

That shouts oppurtunistic stupidity! Even if the assumption was that the house was empty and then the car being an easy steal... the house - full of valuables considering the victim has 2 cars, one worth £20k - is left untouched.

How did the police know it was the same guy? Did he leave the satnav in the drivers seat when he dumped the Saab or was it an assumption? What if the guy was just really unlucky?

A simple PIN on the device stops this story coming to light, ever - even the urban myth side of it - and Mr. Walsh getting his panties in a twist.

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Muffy Mount voted ultimate 'nom de sex'

Steve Cook

which pet?

I think my first pet was either a gerbil called Fidget or my cat, Garfield who was stolen by my then neighbor!

Fidget Farm soounds better.

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Old timer ices crazed squirrel with zimmer frame

Steve Cook

Too much time on their hands?

How do police find out about how it got miffed? Question the poor things relatives? Ask co-workers if he had any mental problems?

I say murder out and out. The old dear wanted to extend her premises and kicked out the local inhabitants, who then kicked back against the ninja speed zimmer frame wielding expert.

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Jet-powered go-kart roars onto eBay

Steve Cook

for the price of a fireblade you can have a JET POWERED KART....

Just no... I mean, come off it. Do I want to get a 160+mph bike with a sub 3 second 0-60 and fantastic performance and looks that matches women's Brad Pritt fantasies?

I'm guessing, wildy mind you, that cornering is not fantastic - if it exists, pulling away from silly boy racers is hard to do at best and is more uncomfortable than the original Green Meanie. Between a Fireblade and a drag kart... Fireblade wins hands down in all but... but... fuel consumption?

Nice engineering though, if you can build that, how about going one up and trebling the size and power? Mega Kart?

...only on Nintendo

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