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* Posts by earl grey

396 posts • joined 28 Sep 2011

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FBI: Your real SECURITY TERROR? An ANGRY INSIDE MAN

earl grey
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Gruntle your employees

Problem Solved!

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4chan outraged by Emma Watson nudie photo leak SCAM

earl grey
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Coat

at least it wasn't "bend over"

getting my coat

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Range Rover to fit trendy new SUV with FRIKKIN' LASER HUDs

earl grey
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Trollface

i read gear as BEAR

And i wondered what kind of bear it was....that, at least, would make it more interesting.

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Net Neutrality? Hold my coffee, I got this: FCC says it's still considering all options for Open Web

earl grey
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Facepalm

CLICK........................gasp

it's as if millions of comments had suddenly been deleted...

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ISPs' post-net-neutrality world is built on 'bribes' says Tim Berners-Lee

earl grey
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Facepalm

income will then come directly from consumers

It already does.

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Oh God the RUBBER on my SHAFT has gone wrong and is STICKING to things

earl grey
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clean that gunk

Start with dish detergent....no luck?

Go to denatured alcohol...no luck?

Go to MEK or Toluol...no luck?

go to flames

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earl grey
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Trollface

something you're continually fingering

Au contraire. I've been fingering my stylus the last 50 years and other than a few wrinkles here and there, it's just like new.

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Microsoft's axeman Nadella fills baskets with 2,100 fresh heads

earl grey
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FAIL

so MS is giving up all its H1B visa requests

Didn't think so.

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Net neutrality fans' joy as '2.3 million email' flood hits US Congress

earl grey
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Trollface

But, if you're not in the US

You will get a very kind ODFO.

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Read The Gods of War for every tired cliche you never wanted to see in a sci fi book

earl grey
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Trollface

Don't need sharks with tornados

Still waiting for my sharks with frikkin' lasers.

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The Apple Watch and CROTCH RUBBING. How are they related?

earl grey
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Joke

Traci?

Was that pre-legal or post-legal? Erm, not that i know anything about any of that; or who she is; or what she does; or anything at all... yeah, that's it...I didn't really post here today.

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Seagate's BUMPER State of the Storage Nation announcement

earl grey
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The MTBF figure is two million hours

TL; DR seagate? yeah, sure.

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Who on Earth would buy a digi-watch? Answer: NUDISTS - in their millions

earl grey
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Joke

there's always nature's pocket

if you have to ask...

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Intellifridge terror: Internet of Stuff kit must fend off hackers of the FU-TURE-TURE-TURE

earl grey
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Facepalm

My TV is talking to me

No, wait; it's the fridge. I can easily imagine how the wacko anti-cell-tower folks are going to flip over having "stuff" in their own house sending secret messages into the aether.

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James Bond's metal-toothed nemesis Richard Kiel dies at 74

earl grey
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Happy

RIP sir.

Condolences to friends and family. You really were one of the good guys.

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Forget silly privacy worries - help biometrics firms make MILLIONS

earl grey
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Trollface

Re: " FINGERPRINTS"

I can get 'Nectar Points'? Which finger do you want? What?, not that one!

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Whopping 10TB disks spin out of HGST – plus 3.2TB flash slabs

earl grey
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Meh

reliability

So, does anyone have reliability stats on these HGST units?

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IT jargon is absolutely REAMED with sexual double-entendres

earl grey
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Pint

well done Dabbs.

Have another one

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SHIP OF FAIL: How do we right capsized institutions we thought would NEVER go under?

earl grey
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FAIL

Re: Has anyone noticed

Timur's mountains of skulls were greatly exaggerated for effect.

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Video: Dyson unveils ROBOTIC TANK that hoovers while you're out

earl grey
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Facepalm

"tracks....to let it get over small obstacles."

MEEOWTH!

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earl grey
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Trollface

Re: Sucks more

Maybe not your shoes, but if it can climb doors with the tracks, it can polish your knob.

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4th Century GOBLET could REVIVE CORPSE of holographic storage

earl grey
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Dichroic glass

Still available from many artisans. Still as amazing as ever. Beautiful things brought to you by chemistry.

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CNN 'tech analyst' on NAKED CELEBS: WHO IS this mystery '4chan' PERSON?

earl grey
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Trollface

what idiot uses 1 2 3 4 5 for a password

well, there must be a few

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Internet of Things: Major players agree on goals, but little else

earl grey
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won't want it; don't need it

Said it before, so i'll bore you with it again. There's virtually nothing in my house (except my computer) that i want talking to anything; anywhere; period. And i'm not always sure about the computer. 'nuff said.

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Twitter: La la la, we haven't heard of NUDE JLaw, Upton SELFIES

earl grey
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Re: Polaroids FTW

"sending said filth"

Seriously? Nudity equates with filth now? What bizarro world do you inhabit?

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earl grey
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Trollface

Re: What's a jlaw?

I keep reading that as "what's a jackdaw?"

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Ofcom will not probe lesbian lizard snog in new Dr Who series

earl grey
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Unhappy

Re: Lesbianism vs. beastiality

Thanks. I'm off my tea now.

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BOFH: The current value of our IT ASSets? Minus eleventy-seven...

earl grey
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Pint

That Sharon

She'll put you in hot water every time.

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'Stop dissing Google or quit': OK, I quit, says Code Club co-founder

earl grey
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Mushroom

get back “within a week”.

In other words, go F yourself for a week and we MIGHT get back to you.

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MEN WANTED to satisfy town full of yearning BRAZILIAN HOTNESS

earl grey
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Trollface

herds ????

I think i see the problem here..

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That 8TB Seagate MONSTER? It's HERE... (You'll have to squint, 'cos there are no specs)

earl grey
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Unhappy

have had too many seagate problems

Have to admit that WD have not aways been stellar. Red, Blue, Green; what does it all mean. The best were the Blacks which i got and so far, no complaints. Wish i could say the same for other companies, though i did like the old IBM drives.

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Time Warner Cable customers SQUEAL as US network goes offline

earl grey
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Stop

"blighting the telco"

Dear el Reg,

Please stop referring to the cable companies in the US as "telco". They are not. They may be ISPs; but beside that are primarily cable (TV) providers and their "telephony" services do not approach those of the traditional telephone providers.

Thank you.

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Now that's FIRE WIRE: HP recalls 6 MILLION burn-risk laptop cables

earl grey
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Trollface

"dodgy wiring in the Chinese-manufactured"

redundant statement is redundant.

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Vampires and Ninjas versus the Alien Jedi Robot Pirates: It's ON

earl grey
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You will be assimilated.

BORG for the win.

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Netflix swallows yet another bitter pill, inks peering deal with TWC

earl grey
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Unhappy

"major US telco"

TWC is not so much a "major US telco" as a large ISP and cable TV provider. Any "telco" services they supply are minor and not subject to normal telco regulation.

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The Register to boldly go where no Vulture has gone before: The WEEKEND

earl grey
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Joke

new Week End Environment

or WEE

how appropriate

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US TV stations bowl sueball directly at FCC's spectrum mega-sale

earl grey
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WTF?

this will only screw over OTA viewers

People who are OTA viewers will not find their stations where they expect them to be; and in fact may lost some of them in crowded markets due to frequency issues. The current digital is no blessing, as the weaker signal means users (like myself) lose the ability to view what used to come through plainly. I say if you're going to force them to digital, bump up the power again so that the signal gets further than 10 feet.

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Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD

earl grey
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Unhappy

Just don't hit a skunk

You don't be happy...the skunk won't be happy...and anyone coming down the road for the next week won't be happy.

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Take the shame: Microsofties ADMIT to playing Internet Explorer name-change game

earl grey
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Re: The search engion is Bing

Cleanup on my monitor please.

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Dell slaps Intel Haswell brawn in monster Precision workstations

earl grey
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"deter light-fingered staff"

I'm insulted.

You have a key for this thing?

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Stanford boffin is first woman to bag 'math Nobel Prize'

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Good on her!

Pleased to see a woman (finally) get selected for this prize. Hopefully it will encourage more women and young ladies to get seriously into math and make it theirs.

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Scottish independence debate: STV player flops under weight of viewers

earl grey
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Give Scotland to the US

But you'll have to take California and Texas.

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NSA leaker Thomas Drake says Oz security reforms are 'scary'

earl grey
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Unhappy

Re: Nothing is too extreme for this OZ government

OH, you said scary. I read it as scaly.

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It's WAR: Internet of Stuff firms butt heads over talking-fridge tech standards

earl grey
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Trollface

the best hasn't even been mentioned

Your shiney new fridge has just slurped up all your internet bandwidth for the month...sorry, you are getting slowed down to a lower tier and charged extra since your toaster wants to play on the interwebs, too.

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earl grey
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no thanks

I can't think of a single appliance or device in my house that i want connected to any other device and especially NOT to the interwebs where the data is available to a "select few" or to some derp hacker down the street from me.

I barely let my computer talk to the internet; and there are days i wonder about that.

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The Register is HIRING technology hacks for the WORLD

earl grey
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Trollface

Tabloid

AKA bog roll.

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BOFH: The Great Backup BACKDOWN

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Pint

i'm thinking

the incendiary device should have been pressure triggered by someone sitting on the boss's chair.

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Thirteen Astonishing True Facts You Never Knew About SCREWS

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Trollface

7,416 Distinct Screw Species

Pictures, or it never happened.

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14 antivirus apps found to have security problems

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Trollface

Re: Java Exploit in Callous Cat Does Not Care" website

Strange, that link doesn't work.

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Who should do security clearance checks? Did you say 'chat-bot'? This military slinger hopes so

earl grey
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standard polygraph tests

I thought these were pretty much proved to be hokum a long time ago. You mean some poor mis-guided soul still uses them? Shame.

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