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* Posts by Powernumpty

237 posts • joined 25 Sep 2011

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Yahoo!... Our Alibaba stake's worth BILLIONS. Oh – our shares are in the toilet

Powernumpty
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Maybe something is inverting it's value !

Can't think what !

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Le whoops! Microsoft France boss blows lid off 'Windows 9' event

Powernumpty
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@P.Lee

"but they also do add new cool features, such as an easy to use backup system"

Whereas MS take away backup features or hide under some Win7 file recovery "(we'd rather you didn't find it) link.

If I type "Backup" There is file history but the icon looks Metro so I just can find the energy to wait for it to launch or the doubtless bullshit thereafter.

I suppose it is meant to force people to use Sky drive or something but the contrast is there.

Apple "we'll include this people might like it"

MS "we'll hide this people like it"

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Oh God the RUBBER on my SHAFT has gone wrong and is STICKING to things

Powernumpty
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Sun tan lotion

I used to sell binoculars and cameras, something in suntan lotion accelerates the demise of rubber coated technical goods.

To be exact I used to work sell and repairing cameras and binoculars on the coast, the issue is less apparent in the winter.

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'Kim Kardashian snaps naked selfies with a BLACKBERRY'. *Twitterati gasps*

Powernumpty
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Maybe a reflection

on modern sensibilities that it was considered more comment-worthy that she used a Blackberry than the security or privacy side of the event.

Somehow I feel these twittering fashionistas get what they deserve.

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Drones CAN'T deliver goods ... oh. Air traffic control system backed by NASA, you say?

Powernumpty
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Re: What about

It's that sort of lateral thinking that I see as the way forward.

Too much of this discussion is black and white Van v Drone where the aerial vehicle is (justifiably) seen as unable to replace the Van in it's current use.

UAVs are not Vans and trying to replace one with the other is too simple a viewpoint.

The UAV bit is only part of the delivery chain, maybe lorries will pass through local set off points and automated systems pick and dispatch from motorway service stations.

The flight corridor should not be insurmountable if the various legs of the system are tailored to the transport vehicle's strength, move three tonne on direct M-way route, that will be a truck, 150g medicine across three miles of unclassified roads, UAV, but ONLY for the air-efficient leg.

Have the traffic control and some pathways from mobile phone masts, have mesh corridors and crash zones so that if the system goes down the UAV's head to farmer Giles back meadow (the one he's paid UAVSA for) or the local sewage treatment works, better to recover the bits from some sh!t than hit a school.

It's coming and many can see it evolving, others say there will always be vans just like messenger boys.

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Infosec geniuses hack a Canon PRINTER and install DOOM

Powernumpty
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Re: I want to know

Not to forget drivers supplied with printers now (looking at you HP) are larger than the OS disk from Doom's day.

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'Windows 9' LEAK: Microsoft's playing catchup with Linux

Powernumpty
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Alt Pin, Ctrl Pin

Did anyone else when watching the time consuming "Pin to Start", resize, juggle dance want to see an option to "pin at X size" Maybe not another drop down level but perhaps pin to command while Alt held or some other key combination to pin small.

Same with pin anywhere, if I am going to use the thing I want to be able to select five things at one go, Pin to start, size small.

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City hidden beneath England's Stonehenge had HUMAN ABATTOIR. And a pub

Powernumpty
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I think I know

Yeah it's all very good guys, and some of those stones are pretty big but it's all bit blocky.

Me and my mates who did Gobekli Tepe made an effort, now that is what I call a stone circle.

These are all right and will probably last for a while but they are not very pretty are they, where's your animals, fancy carving and stuff?

---

Early monumental one-upmanship lead to an unfortunate end for some travellers around Salisbury.

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Heavy VPN users are probably pirates, says BBC

Powernumpty
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Other curve

<smug>

With increasing TV consumption is there not a decrease in critical faculty? Those considered most attracted to the VPN use are also least able to facilitate it.

</smug>

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China is now 99.8% sure you're you, thanks to world's-best facial recognition wares

Powernumpty
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Triple punishment

I can see it here.

After use of the latest technology, extensive police investigation and brave witness testimony, we have identified him from biometric data and DNA, we are 100% sure he is the one responsible for a range of misdemeanour’s.

He has been proven guilty in a court of law and now waits his punishment.

Mr Blogs as you are an illegal immigrant who is working in the dark economy paying no taxes and observing no laws I am forced to pass on you the highest penalty open to this court.

Tsk, tsk ,tsk!

Now on your way.

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Chelyabinsk-sized SURPRISE asteroid to skim Earth, satnav birds

Powernumpty
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Facepalm

I wonder,

just how big impact would be needed to surpass man's own global extinction of species?

They might have seen us coming but we had such a mass of hubris they could not deflect us.

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Look out, world! Space Station satellite cannon has A MIND OF ITS OWN

Powernumpty
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Oh I'm really sorry,

That hasn't happend before.

"There is plenty of time, we have all these, lets see if we can do better next time eh."

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Finally, a USEFUL smart device: Intel boffins cook up gyro-magneto-'puter bike helmet

Powernumpty
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Re: Battery life

On detecting low battery the music switches to heavy metal to activate the kinetic charging.

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Data entry REAR-END SNAFU: Weighty ballsup leads to plane take-off flap

Powernumpty
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Alert

Call to all passengers

Do we have any real lard arses on the plane who can still walk?

If so please make yourself known to the ballast steward.

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Video: Dyson unveils ROBOTIC TANK that hoovers while you're out

Powernumpty
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I'm sorry

but if the 360 camera is not IP enabled and we can't have a "Some perv hacked my hoover" Daily Fail story then I'm not interested.

"I could not work out why it was always cleaning the bathroom when I was in the shower or doing my spray tan" 23 year old Alesha (picture below) from Rayleigh explained. “I would not have minded but it was really wearing my rug out”.

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Good luck with Project Wing, Google. This drone moonshot is NEVER going to happen

Powernumpty
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Re: I still think of the local shop

Between your words of witty cynicism you have given me an idea.

So this “Van” thing (creepy feeling I've heard that somewhere before) is scaled to the work load and jobs, it has wheels OK I get all that, well make the size thing more real time and you have invented the “Leggett Lofter” (TM).

Plan the job route so that the wheels are used until it has offloaded enough weight to switch to aerial, complete the last remote small drops and return to base empty by air.

See a genius behind the sneer.

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Powernumpty
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I still think of the local shop

becoming the local Drop.

An agreed location with (out of hours) automatic lockers and CCTV. The goods are dropped, end up in a pick up box accessible only with the purchasing card or some other verification.

Air lanes between “drops” can be be agreed.

Maybe the local school, park, can get a sponsored point,.

Argos, Tesco, M&S have a DropShop pick up point in the car park.

With a bigger bespoke drop area quieter more efficient planes could be used.

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Scared of brute force password attacks? Just 'GIVE UP' says Microsoft

Powernumpty
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Watts up.

“Listen guys we need to look at the electricity usage for the crypto lab. Since not everyone is using government approved algorithms we are still spending a bunch of holiday cash on decryption runs. Does anyone have any ideas on this?”

“Ban other algorithms?”

“OK Good, we are working on that, anything else?”

“Force 2 character passwords?” (much laughter)

“Nice, anything else?”

“Tell the average user simpler passwords are better?”

“OK I'll bite, how?”

“Tell them all they need is a simple word as we will protect them with very clever use of padlocks and magic” (more laughter)

“No wait guys, he might have a point, if we can take away that drudgery of remembering passwords and get people believe that is simple good enough we could save a crypto rig or two, we'd probably want to pick a fairly IT illiterate crowd though" (laughter).

“[REDACTED] users?” (much laughter)

“You might just be on to something...”

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Ballmer PERSONALLY wrote Windows' Blue Screen of Death text

Powernumpty
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It was runing OK until I hit save

Then suddenly it Balmered on me!

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NASA clears zero-G 3D printer for mission to SPAAAAACE

Powernumpty
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ISS this is Vulture 13, we have a problem.

OK get your mission control to send us the nose cone plans and we'll get you fixed for home!

Cue patriotic music, special relationship in space, sun going over horizon etc..

Just make sure someone reminds them Metric now and then OK, we don't need Sandra Bullock in on this one.

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SHARE 'N' SINK: OneDrive corrupting Office 2013 files

Powernumpty
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Facepalm

Overly harsh maybe

Am I being overly critical in wondering if the new deity "cloud" should transcend local regional holidays?

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Cargo truck crammed with garbage explodes IN SPAAAAACE

Powernumpty
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Should I ever be lucky enough

In some future incarnation travel out to space I would not like to be taken out by some 7km/s rapidly defrosting turd.

I know, I know, it's "all about me" but I have just discovered a personal preference I never knew I had.

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Microsoft boots 1,500 dodgy apps from the Windows Store

Powernumpty
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Trollface

Re: Windows has a store?

That had more than 1500 apps yesterday!

Why didn't somebody mention this?

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MEN WANTED to satisfy town full of yearning BRAZILIAN HOTNESS

Powernumpty
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Felines

I bet the place is full of cats and it is a lynchable offence to leave the toilet seat up.

Just checking travel plans on rome2rio and picking up some catnip now...

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The Register Monopoly Pubcrawl Mobile Map: VODAFONE VICTOR in LONDON

Powernumpty
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Mobile Scenarios

I wish there was an interactive route planner, location to location, using X data, Y calls.

One of my problems with mobile phone service providers is guessing what coverage will be like in the UK while at the same time avoiding punitive tariffs while overseas.

I know the phone companies have “send us your phone bill and we'll calculate the saving” but they are happy to leave out any awkward facts like lack of coverage.

Having a reduced call charge is meaningless if you can't make the call or having a decent data link but charged at £6/MB.

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Now that's FIRE WIRE: HP recalls 6 MILLION burn-risk laptop cables

Powernumpty
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Price of copper

Would have nothing to do with it?

You could save a few cents there and only burn a few houses, who would ever know....

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Microsoft refuses to nip 'Windows 9' unzip lip slip

Powernumpty
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I wonder

What else they will break?

That is a flippant but somewhat serious question.

I believe Microsoft gets some bad press from those they tire out. If yesterday a button or command was available to do some change and today it is missing, hidden, reversed in operation, the long term user may ask "what was the purpose of that particular defenestration?" if the logical answer comes back "just to make it look like someone, or some group is making changes” then there could understandably be a feeling of distrust or disappointment.

I know to be seen as a valid stock market investment they need to grind relentless with “I'm exited to be presenting...” ideas but they should not loose sight of the fact that business needs to just “get on, you know”, for those not in the market to sell operating systems they are pretty tedious things once they get in the way.

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Munich considers dumping Linux for ... GULP ... Windows!

Powernumpty
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Re: I smell a shill

Windows 8 really did me a favour.

Couple of significant users seemed to think they were loosing out on the upgrades race so they got Win 8 laptops, has really made them go quiet on the new is obviously better theme.

Users complain about software in use.

There is no direct correlation between users complaining and other software being a wise move.

User may complain that "Linux" stopped me hitting that deadline when hangover, distraction, lack of training may have been the bigger cause. The fact there will be financial gains to some vendors jumping ship would certainly be shill bait and call for scrutiny.

I can see that the early adoption may have given them some of the largest mountains to climb and I am grateful for the vision, just feels all wrong to consider users normal (possibly) moaning to get more consideration than a technical review of workflow and project plan based on the facts. Maybe the beards have given up and are drowning under the combined weight of the well incentivised political low brows.

What are the facts, not facebook rants and what is the comparative costs.

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Time to move away from Windows 7 ... whoa, whoa, who said anything about Windows 8?

Powernumpty
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But this has four!!

I sometimes wonder if some OS's are like a multi ink pen, there is an obvious sales "advantage" of having on tap four colour inks with a downside of increased complexity cost and size.

But it can write in four tones at the click of a switch that has to be a market leader right!

Well no, most people need less functionality in a work pen, they need to it to be reliable and efficient so the single ink pens remain in the majority.

An OS should be able to do a few things reliably and repeatedly for a number of years, it's a tool not a fashion statement.

If one good thing were to come of an ecosystem power struggle it could be the definition of basic OS tasks. Right now we have varied methods for simple work actions that should be intuitive and OS agnostic, the user should not need to know what OS is underlying their current actions.

I'm not sold on the cloud as a panacea but it could provide the common ground where OS's could be judged for their longer term investment.

If Cloud (local or remote) reduces the protocols and proprietary methods employed we should be able to judge the OS as a single ink pen rather than trying to work out where they have moved the blue this year (and regain efficiency).

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Synology and the NAS-ty malware-flingers: What can be learned

Powernumpty
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KISS

Having looked at the available Bells and Whistles apps for the Synology NAS I kept coming back the thought "but why would you put that on something which by design has a lot of your valuable data/backups?" I can see the sales people screaming can it make coffee yet!? while the guys responsible for the backbone NAS functionality are busy freshening up their CV and broadening the Linkedin profile to pay the rent. It will end in tears, someone has lost sight of a main drive for NAS, secure file storage and backup.

If you want Joomla/Moodle/MediaWiki etc. install a hypervisor on a box somewhere and get to know TurnkeyLinux, assume something will get hacked or broken and keep them contained to limit the blast radius. Don't keep putting your Kinder, chicken and Fabergé in the same basket.

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Canada's boffins need A WHOLE YEAR to recover from China hack attack

Powernumpty
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Re: Tokens

@dan1980

I was thinking more about companies that need to do business with other companies via the internet but not to the level of shared network.

In the real world there is a degree of risk, the shoplifter has to physically enter the shop, that is a commitment and investment in the exchange, on the internet there is little if any exposure for the hacker.

In the physical world we used to have walls around businesses, they could be measured and built to suit the neighbourhood. It used to amaze me (being from the south east) that in Norway large companies often didn't have any fence at all, nothing you could walk up to the front door/window and press your nose on it.

Now in the internet business world your fence goes through every Favela, Nigerian internet café and hackers bedroom, much harder to tailor to the environs.

To get it back in scale I think companies should pull back from that model.

If a company wants to do business with a range of others in an intermittent basis have the remote end invest in the interchange, have them put down some value to show they are committed to working with you to keep the fence between you only as high as it need be. If a company thinks that every one of it's hundred remote offices need quick access to your valuable information either have them go through one secured proxy or have them put down a decent sum to say they are committed to securing their systems and by doing so protecting your resources. Currently to say “I want to you give good access to X thousand addresses I look after but I am no prepared to give you my name or one atom of security” is the norm.

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Powernumpty
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Holmes

Tokens

Where Entity A needs to contact Entity B in a trusted manner they should come bearing a token.

That IP range specific Token should be available once a surety has been paid.

Get the remote to put up say 1M$ for a /16 (for example). Then should there be a proven breach from that IP range they forfeit that amount (not quite sure who to).

Obviously for a narrow IP range to have access the value would be less, for a single IPv6 it could be a few hundred beer tokens.

That way it becomes in the interest of the remote party to keep their house in order and the firewall white list is "those currently assured".

At one stage I did think there should be a daily image file embedded in every email sent to me, one of my images, copyrighted and only given use rights to certain non spamming companies. No Image have a bounce, incorrect use have a domain block with public shaming.

The current "send me some packets, any old packets, worse you've got and I'll stop what other stuff I'm doing and try to deal with them" is the wrong firewall dynamic.

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Microsoft's Euro cloud darkens: US FEDS can dig into foreign servers

Powernumpty
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On your side at this point

Then we'll get you in a headlock and you have to look really trapped but still fighting, the crowd should be on your side at that point.

Will it hurt?

It has to look as it hurts of the crowd won't buy it, slap the canvas a few times with your lawyers.

Then what?

Then you'll surprise us with a quick move and we'll go face down for a while, let the crowd enjoy that for about a week.

Then I pick up the paycheck?

Not right then but soon. You have to be seen to win the bout against a much bigger opponent but really the crowd secretly knows we let you win, it's all part of the game, keeping the status quo, then you leave the ring to chanting, shower and pay-check for being part of the team, OK?

Do I do promotional stuff?

Probably best not eh.

------------

Oops meant for another forum sorry

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August Patch Tuesday to bring Windows bug fixes AND FEATURES – report

Powernumpty
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Re: Microsoft, please don't add a start menu ....

Ah yeah I hadn't thought that through.

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Powernumpty
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Re: Microsoft, please don't add a start menu ....

A little harsh Trevor, you try listening to customers while vigorously chest thumping and cock blocking other managers.

I know this will be sacriligous and I'm not for token employees but what if there was female boss at MS, what if.

(Misogynists morning call that will be)

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Chrome browser has been DRAINING PC batteries for YEARS

Powernumpty
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Havn't been swayed

by all the talk of how good Chrome is, still prefer Firefox for just being sensible.

I set up a local single letter domains on a local server for various shared links, firefox will observe it as an address but good old Chrome generally wants to go look for n.com out in the real world, "I couldn't find n.com do you mean this advert, this advert or this advert?" no I mean observer the local network settings, local DNS and get the hell out of my way.

(sorry probably said this before)

A user at work went the chromebook route and installed lots of test apps (or whatever the addons are called) on his identity then signed in like that work, suddenly loads of issues with an otherwise sound CAD workstation. After the "IT Problems" moaning I cleaned it up and said lets leave Chrome off this time, all good and after a while we agreed to try Chrome back on but not to log in with the "all that home crap" profile, strangely similar issues very soon.

New workstation (same OS and software) no chrome just firefox and now it's all good, old worksation new OS install to another user, no chrome all good, I see a pattern here and I can see no reason to encourage Chrome use in the workplace over Firefox.

Chrome is becoming a virtual machine install for advertising not a browser.

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Cops nab suspect using CREEPY facial recog system

Powernumpty
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'ere sarge

didn't we arrest someone else with just one eye in the middle of their forehead last month?

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Redmond may buy security company it says is wrong about AD flaw

Powernumpty
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Big Brother

Hushdear

Here's a little something, have a holiday, have a lovely time and forget about all this nonsense eh.

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Weaponised Flash flaw can pinch just about anything from anywhere

Powernumpty
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Just me?

Anyone sick of trying to explain to users why flash, java, browsers etc pose security risks so should be updated as critical patches come along?

"But we only updated that last week!", "I'm too busy"

FFS, yes we did, and we'll be doing the same next week, month, year until what users have to steal is worth less than the effort of finding the holes, I'm sorry.

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Standby consumes MORE POWER THAN CANADA: IEA

Powernumpty
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Need to be on?

I want presence or proximity sensing technology in the house, not being a big oven user why can it be on when I am not there? (and never leave it on intentionally while absent).

I want to be able to categorise appliances (a very quick category ideas).

1. Stuff that carries some risk and does not ever need to be on when the house is empty (kettle, Iron, power hand tools, shower).

2. Things that may be left on but need to be acknowledged on exit (slow cooker, washing machine, dehumidifier)

3. Junk, stuff that really has low risk but should be off unless its power schedule permits for updates (games console, recorders, PC)

There could be another couple like remote "graceful shutdown" and "power cut" so if the house is remotely monitored and severe electrical storm approaches or fire is identified the big red button can be pressed.

That said my biggest saving on electricity was the power company replacing a faulty meter, only really spotted the issue as I was using http://www.imeasure.org.uk/ and spotted the display fading when taking readings, that also allowed me to see the change when the meter was replaced.

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Brit celebs' homes VANISH from Google's Street View

Powernumpty
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Trollface

Rightmove

House prices in blurred areas are 40% higher than those in (shudder) focused areas.

That is why you will hear the phrase "funds focused on the poor."

Obviously I and all my of my colleagues live in fully pixelated estate.

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Facebook goes TITSUP across WORLD! Who will look at your cousin's baby NOW?

Powernumpty
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Valley accent please

Shouldn't there be like, some kind of emergency service for this? The government should do something, I was like just posting this selfie and it like was not going, I don't know what i should do, should I call 911? I could do a selfie with me and the emergency facebook responders or something.

Hello? can anybody see me?

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DANGER MOUSE is back ... and he isn't half a GLASSHOLE

Powernumpty
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Eyebrows that float

Deeply brilliant concept, we know it's daft, they know it's daft, together as sentient beings we can both marvel at the simplicity and ridiculous nature of the animation while enjoying the humour.

Sad to say V2.0 will probably introduce modern irrelevant distraction and “Bring it up to date”,

Completely missing the point.

I bet even the voices won't be a patch on the old ones.

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Chap builds rotary dial mobile phone

Powernumpty
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I don't beleive it.

I remember seeing my Granddad in the hallway dialling out on the phone, he was visibly fearful of dialling a wrong number (think of the shame and embarrassment). I remember rotary dials and being given some coppers for the telephone box by the parade of shops so we could practice calling home from a red telephone box. The heavy phone books held on fold up arms, (or was that later..) a slight smell of pee (not mine) the heft of the handset, pressing buttons on connection, the bell hit by the coins still exist in that strange memory.

Who else remembers a time when having access to a phone box was considered a good and important thing, how the layout was before it was all locked down due to the vandalism?

Why the hell is our current life and public space so locked down and limited by the few idiots that want to wreck stuff? Oh that's it I'm off to buy some beige slacks.

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Evernote taken out by DDoS attack

Powernumpty
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First world problems

I so want to care.

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Strategy Boutique ultimate 'tech'-gasm: 3D printer drone GoPro vid stream QR code

Powernumpty
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Re: Do some Commentards not get the joke?

Thank you. I have become so cynical of terms used in the description I hadn't even watched the video as my "Normal Bullshit" lights were flashing so bright I could see past them.

Man this is no normal bull this is exceptional stuff so advanced it is high fiving itself coming back, and i don't think i have to say how excited I am about it.

Thanks again Credas, I might have missed out watching the video if not for you.

(that is actaully serious)

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Plastic is the new rock, say Geologists

Powernumpty
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Nurdleology

Here we see a layer of Nurdlestone, this indicates the presence of Humans which were an ape species known for their extreme self interest and lack of understanding of natural balance. The small black specs are Nikeduels made from a specific manufacturers logo found on forms of artificial footwear and other clothing, this period marks the peak of human indifference to matters of pollution and concentration on their own feet, battles were often fought in conurbations over such footwear with death not unknown for possession of those items...

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China puts Windows 8 on TV, screams: 'SECURITY, GET IT OUT OF HERE!'

Powernumpty
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Re: Look at page 113 of the 'Greenwald' file

Can't help feeling if you aren't prepepared to identify "page 113" the content might be a little tough going.

It's one thing to assume in some cynical way a cloud service may have been compromised but it's another to see them talking up the benefits to their "Enterprise Customers".

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