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* Posts by Andy Roid McUser

92 posts • joined 16 Aug 2011

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UK's CASH POINTS to MISS Windows XP withdrawal date

Andy Roid McUser
Go

xp

Never really give ATM's much thought besides the usual look for dodgy face plates / skimmers and only ones on the side of the bank protected by a camera.

After having my memory refreshed about OS/2 running on these things I never thought for a moment that anyone in their right mind would use XP for something that needed to run 24/7.

So for all the MS bashing above, I'll say this.. 99.9% of the time I go to use an ATM it's working , no error messages and the best technology is the stuff you don't notice, so for that , well done NCR and Microsoft.. Who would have thought...

I have no bias as to what OS they use, just as long as I can get my beer tokens on the way to the pub.

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Another climate change myth DEBUNKED by proper climate scientists

Andy Roid McUser
Pint

you can avoid nasty weather...

Sitting on your deckchair in a lovely walled garden running iWeather.

Problem solved. Thanks Apple.

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Actor who played Rogue Two in Star Wars dies aged 67

Andy Roid McUser

honour the man who helped destroy the death star

Aim your missiles towards the light Chris an Stay on Target! !

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Nokia and HTC throw down swords, sign patent war peace treaty

Andy Roid McUser
Joke

good will to all men ( and women )

For peace to work all you need is one side with a bigger gun.

These patent press releases are hilarious.. Legal staff for Company X and Company Y sat around a table and after many courtroom drama's at a cost of $$$ Company Y has decided to give Company X a few SUV's full of cold hard cash. In return Company X will stop attempting to extort assets from Company Y now that Company Y has willingly handed over a lot of money. Company Y can now protect itself from future litigation by using Company X's patent war chest. Freeing up Company X to make litigation proceedings against Companies A,B & C now that precedence has been set.

Everyone at Company X is rather quite pleased with themselves. Staff at Company Y are wondering why they feel cheap , dirty and violated.

Not too dissimilar from 'Mob' protection money , just done in a court and with 'we're all great friends' press releases. Isn't modern business just lovely.

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Nokia to launch low-cost Android phone this month – report

Andy Roid McUser
Joke

perry mason

Wonder if MS will drag MicroNokia to court for infringing its patents, so all the other Android vendors don't feel left out. Then.. and just because this is all make believe , The Moto-Goog-Sung alliance leap to Micro-Nokia's defense with it's patent portfolio protection. Chanting 'we look after our own'.

Meanwhile - Tim Cook sits in the corner, lonely, talking to himself wishing an idea might present itself so those wild promises of 'something great is coming.. sometime in the future .. honest...' don't look so silly when he announces the iPhone 5ds.

Nintendo takes Apple to court for trademark infringement, wins, acquires Apple in the settlement and launches a dual screen gaming console with an integrated phone that's unashamedly plastic and captures the yoof market. Mario becomes self aware and get's a job with the Department of Defense.

Microsoft, after biding it's time, demolishes Nintendo in court for stealing it's dual screen Courier designs and acquires Nintend-apple, using the Johnnie Cochran Chewbacca defense that so successfully got O.J.Simpson off those nasty murder charges.

Steve Ballmer chucks a couple of cats at some chairs in celebration, rubs his hands and yells 'mission complete mother f£$ker... hell yeah !!!!!!' for it was Steve-o's plan all along to assimilate NokIntendApple and replace every device on the planet with the ever-so-successful Metro/Notro/Rubbish interface.

In a none too surprising move, Google gets rather miffed and launches it's little known attack dog department the Central Intelligence Agency to assassinate Ballmer and re-instate the puppet dictator .. Agent Satya Nadella.

Google gets back to 'monitoring' our activities after the little distraction. The news reports that Steve Ballmer, the computing visionary was lost at sea and the search has been called off due to no one caring.

I should go and do some work now.

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Bitcoin's so over. We're mining Primeco... Oh SNAP, my box is a ZOMBIE!

Andy Roid McUser

Re: Magical Internet Money

You could lose 50-98% of your investment or 1 BTC could go to 40k. No one knows. Its all just speculation. Play with money you can afford to lose and wait. If adoption rates continue to rise and .. the big if... there isn't a massive US clampdown like there was in china mid December. . It 'could' be worth buying a bit and waiting. Best time to buy is immediately after some bad news. Proceed with caution.

I work in VC and the current thinking is that between 0.5-1% of your investment should be in BTC. However. . If you have credit card debt.. pay that off first.. there is no easy money

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Andy Roid McUser

Re: Magical Internet Money

Profitability.

Single AMD 7970 GPU costs approx £220 , Generates approx 650kH/sec

At current difficulty with a single GPU mining Litecoin you'll earn $3.88 / £2.36 a day

Cost for running each GPU ( assume 250w ) = 6Kwh @ .15p p/kWh = .90p running costs

Pool fees = 1%

Total Profit single GPU = £1.46 per day. Then you just need 150 days ( at current prices ) to pay back the cost of the card ( this is assuming your motherboard , 750w PSU , RAM and CPU were free )

If you get free power ( Cough ) then you'll get your money back quicker.

Note , this assumes the difficulty doesn't increase , which it does over time and thus if the price remained static ( circa $24 per litecoin ) and the difficulty increased you'll maybe break even after six months.

The speculation comes 'if' the price of a litecoin doubles in price.

Yes , you can make money mining alt-coins , especially if you have free power and good cooling but if you're going to speculate , save yourself the hassle and just buy a Bitcoin and wait.

This is coming from a man who's running some pretty serious mining H/W and in scale, because scale matters along with institutional funding...

Just putting the mining profitability into perspective.

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Apple won't bag HUMUNGOUS 4G deal... 'cos China HATES plastic iPhone 5C – analyst

Andy Roid McUser

plastic

The term 'unapologeticallyplastic' still makes me want to shove an iDevice in SirJonny's face.

I appreciate this will not go down well with many and down votes are mandatory. Knock yourself out. I have a hangover and will not feel your keyboard beating.

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El Reg Contraption Confessional No.1: The Dragon 32 micro

Andy Roid McUser

classic computing

I'm currently restoring my 1979 Apple II. Haven't had so much nerd fun in ages.

these old (Relatively ) personal computers are worth maintaining as they become rare.

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Ultimate Doctor Tom Baker REGENERATES, RETURNS to WHO

Andy Roid McUser

thrilled

Dr.Who special without Tom Baker would have been a travesty. Met him once. I regressed into a 10 year old.. apologised for bumping into him in the london underground and out of all the things I could have said to him was .. 'you're dr.who' to which he replied 'yeeeahhhsssss' and walked off.

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Vladimir PUTIN officially HARDER than CHUCK NORRIS

Andy Roid McUser

Chuck Norris could whoop Putin blindfolded

Chuck Norris was once bitten by a poisonous snake. after three days of excrutiating pain, the cobra died

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We've found it – the ULTIMATE man-cave accessory

Andy Roid McUser

Re: Shed?

You've got to have a fridge in your shed. It's the law dammit.

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BlackBerry to be throttled by own supply chain

Andy Roid McUser

Where next ?

This is correct if you take the existing market as a snapshot in time. However, we're getting to a point in Smart-Phones where the hardware differentiation between top end models and lower-mid range devices is eroding.

Like with the business PC market, once CPU's got to 2.4GHz single core, or the first generation of dual core chips, that was enough power to do 95% of the tasks, so it became a race to the bottom and a market with only enough margin for those who could off-load massive amounts of desktops and see a return of 5%. The PC market consolidated into mass production 'good enough' desktops and premium workstations.

The smart phone will and is following this trend, where the differentiation will be in the quality of the materials used and the operating system, however, for much of the planet the price point of $550 for top end devices is out of reach. Where the large players will engage will be in the low-middle arena, something that Motorola has quite smartly identified - as there is evidently no room in the top end- high volume sales bracket for anyone besides Apple and Samsung ( currently ).

Watch for Huawei and Lenovo to join Motorola with a concerted effort in the $100-$200 bracket. The western market for top end devices is slowing, people may chop and change brands occasionally, but the real growth is in India , China etc. The low margin phones will still make a whole lot of capital to the vendors peddling last years tech as 5% profit on a billion device sales is still a healthy profit for those that can scale and ship volume.

Apple will never be in this market, no matter what the analysts or stock holders tell them to do as it's not what their brand represents. Had they wanted to launch a low cost phone, they would have done it with the 5C - they didn't and had they launched a $200 device it would have damaged the brand and crippled the very high margin premium ( 50% ) device where they make all their cash.

There is room for Blackberry but its in the enterprise sector, best strategy for them right now is to get their software onto iDevices , Android and WinPho providing the kind of end to end security that the Enterprises used to enjoy before a marketing firm re-invented the market ( I'm an Android User but still respect what Apple did ). Better to sell a few hundred million software licences on other people's platforms than to compete in a market that currently isn't allowing others to compete in.

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Norks EXECUTE 80 for watching DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES

Andy Roid McUser

Black box theory

I don't see what all the fuss is really, all we need to do is smuggle the Internet into N.Korea.. After all, its only a little black box with a flashing red LED on it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDbyYGrswtg

I'm here to solve the world's problems. Thank me later.

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Oooh! My NAUGHTY SKIRT keeps riding up! Hello, INTERNET EXPLORER

Andy Roid McUser

my favorite Internet Explorer Commercial

This is more like it..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JyGP0ZyxF5E

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Obama to Merkel: No Americans are listening to you on this call

Andy Roid McUser

let me fix the title for you

"No Americans are listening to you on this call"

Should read..

"No, Americans are listening to you on this call"

Simple grammatical error corrected.

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HP CEO Whitman: We've built the PC that GOD wants

Andy Roid McUser

God needs a data farm

If the definition of a God is omnipotence then that can only mean she's built some hardware for the all knowing, all seeing Google.

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SUPERSIZE ME: Nokia unveils Surface rival and 2 plumped-up phablets

Andy Roid McUser

good to see

It's encouraging to see micronokia doing a samsung and trying different form factors to see what sticks. The platform is 'good enough' now. Certainly better than my Motorola xoom 1 when it launched with honeycomb but I still use that device every day. When my battle weary xoom dies, which could be a while as its built like a tank, I could be tempted by some nokia hardware as for me the platform is irrelevant just can I do the stuff I need to do on it. .. jot down idea's, note taking, email , browse and watch movies when traveling.

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Baldness fix from foreskin follicles

Andy Roid McUser

when I'm dead

They'll on get my foreskin when they prise it from my cold dead hands

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Ballmer intends to remain on Microsoft board after end of CEO gig

Andy Roid McUser

can't let go

I fully appreciate that once they took the company public they ran the risk of being outed.. However, like gates and Ballmer or not, they built that company and in their eyes it's still theirs and no VC is going to tell them what to do or when to leave. In my opinion it is time for them both to go but I also understand their reluctance.

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BlackBerry BLOODBATH! Company warns of nearly $1bn quarterly loss

Andy Roid McUser

more staff lay offs

They still have staff left to sack. ? if they still have 10,000 staff left ( before this round of redundancies ) what on earth are/were they doing ?

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Mach 8 Scramjet flies but sends no data

Andy Roid McUser

Re: class - fly on the wall required

stereotyping but made me chuckle.

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Psst.. Wanna Android all-in-one PC? We have the chip tech, says Intel

Andy Roid McUser

Re: It sounds so nice

Also never heard of turbo tax especially when categorised along side such popular apps as office and lightroom.

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iCloud outage outrage: Look, iPhoto friends, kitty just learned to... NOOO

Andy Roid McUser

iWork

So what you're telling us is that it doesn't 'just work'.

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Essential maintenance website down for, er, essential maintenance

Andy Roid McUser

DIY

Must have been in-house development. You should always get a proper tradesman in to build your web site.

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Apple big-screen TV rumor zombie RISES FROM THE DEAD

Andy Roid McUser

siri

An awesome tool to protect the national intellect. Whenever xfactor or SOS homes under the bad parenting super nanny comes on we simply embed into the opening title music 'Siri, turn off the television'.

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AREA 51 - THE TRUTH by the CIA: Official dossier blows lid off US secrets

Andy Roid McUser
Go

SR-71

My favorite aircraft of all time. Mach 3+ using 1960's tech and it still looks like something out of a sci-fi movie. Dreamed of it as a little boy, saw one recently whilst in D.C. Still smiling from it.

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Google to snub Samsung, hand Nexus 10 to Asus – report

Andy Roid McUser
Facepalm

Re: And what of the Microsoft tax?

I'm so tired I read that as 'Microsoft Holiday Tax' and wondered how they got the airlines to sign a bogus patent deal.

whatever next.. bedroom tax ?? Oh wait.

going to sleep under my desk for a while until this MS iFog has cleared from my brain...

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Western spooks banned Lenovo PCs after finding back doors

Andy Roid McUser
Joke

Re: What

The UK manufactures stuff ?? I thought we outsourced all that a long time ago.

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Verizon offers Motorola mobe with 48-HOUR battery life

Andy Roid McUser

these are the droids I've been looking for

48 hour talk time, 25 days standby... Finally.. someone get's it. I don't care if the damn thing is 3mm thicker than an iPhone or the latest HTC/Samsung, just give me something I don't have to charge twice a day after medium usage. quad core , octocore can all close the door on the way out - 2 day battery is the sweet spot for me. Oh how i miss my Nokia 6110 and snake..

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Steve Jobs' death clears way for '13-inch' JUMBO iPAD HYPEGASM

Andy Roid McUser
Big Brother

the king is ....

Jobs is dead. Time to 'Think Different'

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Planet-busting British space bullet ready to bomb ice moon Europa

Andy Roid McUser

monolith

So this bypasses the monoliths warning.. 'All these worlds are yours except Europa. Attempt no landing there'

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Microsoft lathers up Windows 8.0 Surface RT for quick price shave

Andy Roid McUser

The El Reg Editor is asleep

23GB and iPod competitor ?

Review then publish. Come on El Reg.. You're better than this..

We all know WinRT could never compete with a 1st Gen iPod ;-)

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In 2017, a pack of hybrid mutants stuffed with NAND flash will descend

Andy Roid McUser

tomorrow the weather forecast will be different

Gartner Shmartnet

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Intel CTO Rattner steps down to attend to 'pressing family matter'

Andy Roid McUser
Coat

coup

Smells like political shenanigans. Still.. his payoff will be handsome..

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Array slinger X-IO jumps on Windows Storage Server filly, digs in heels

Andy Roid McUser
Thumb Up

Thanks

Appreciated.

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Andy Roid McUser
Windows

Would you want your storage array running windows ?

This is by no means a pop/cheap dig at MS. I live in a world populated by EMC, 3PAR for enterprise and the occasional QNAP device for office and home, but I'd like to ask a question of anyone actually running storage server 2012 ( or even 2008 ).

As the base operating system is Win 2012 ( or 2008 ) aren't you perpetually having to reboot nodes on Patch Tuesday and does this fill you with dread ?

I'm naturally aware that HP and EMC's offering also have patches, firmware updates etc but the frequency is far lower. Also are you deploying HIDS and other agents to these nodes ( i.e. obligatory windows security products ) and would you consider the the risk vector higher by running your storage server on windows..

I'm not trolling, just genuinely curious as I have no experience in the Windows Storage Server space at enterprise level. Does anyone ?

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MPs demand UK rates revamp after Google's 'extraordinary tax mismatch'

Andy Roid McUser
Coffee/keyboard

Tax avoidance via a technicality

The technicality allowing Google to pay little or no consequential tax in the UK is quite frankly nonsense. If HMRC want to start collecting from corporations they either have to move away from GPT, as profits are offset against expenses ( see Starbucks UK having to pay high licensing costs to Starbucks Bermuda ( or somewhere similar ) and thus operate with a loss in the UK despite £1.8 Billion in sales ) and simply change corporation tax to be based on turnover instead of profits.

It's far from that simple , I'm not a banker / Accountant but as far as I see , as long as corporation tax is based on Profit , there is nothing to stop any company having to pay 'fees' to an off-shore subsidiary and thus consistently run their UK arm at a loss despite massive sales ( Starbucks, Amazon , Google, Apple and possibly many small businesses also )

I don't know what the solution is but the politicians either need to be frank to the public that we're OK with the large employers paying no tax because they create private sector jobs, or devising a solution that if you want to operate in the UK and you're tax base is elsewhere then you face a turnover tax instead ( or something ).

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We want to put a KILL SWITCH into your PHONE, say Feds

Andy Roid McUser
Stop

Kill Switch Hack

So then along comes the Norks with a preemptive strike. Do they launch nukes, mobilize their army.. no , they hack the kill switch function of all modern phones, leaving only the folks in India with the Asha, Chinese Android clones and that dreadful Tesco mobile with big buttons my mother uses as viable communication devices.

The western world goes into temporary meltdown. Not because their phones have been 'killed' but people are no longer getting their commutes worth of liking video's of kittens playing the piano on Facebook and Stephen Fry irrelevancies on Twitter.

Much to the dismay to the Norks the positive side effect of killing mobile infrastructure is that for a couple of months, westerners start talking to each other and reading books once again - until the mad scramble for new un-kill-able smart phones is release in short order by MicroNokia and we all start sporting Windows Phone 8 devices as it'll take Apple a year to bring a new device out and Samsung don't give a crap.

Thus the moral of the story is , If they install a kill switch into our phones WinPho8 becomes market leader.

Let's fight this outrage before we all have to start reading books again and buying Finnish.

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IBM's $1bn layoffs latest: Now axe swings in US, Canada - reports

Andy Roid McUser
Terminator

watson

According to my source in big blue.. This chap 'Watson' is running the show now. Keeps harping on about 'eradicating the humans' or something. Apparently he's quite the pub quiz know-it-all and was last seen tinkering with some automated flying 'kill-bots'.. Must be a call of duty fan too from what I gather.

These computer types are all rather clever.

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Boffins fire up old dish to send interstellar SMS

Andy Roid McUser
Stop

terrible idea

Have these people not seen Predator ? Arnie is too old to save us now.

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Nokia, Microsoft put on brave face as Lumia 925s parachute into Blighty

Andy Roid McUser
Go

Noikandroid

Please please please Nokia , just make me a stock Android phone on your hardware.

That is all.

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So, Windows 8.1 to give PC sales a shot in arm? BZZZZT, wrong answer

Andy Roid McUser

@ Butt Futter

Butt Futter - Are you agreeing with your own posts as AC - That's weird

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Andy Roid McUser
Unhappy

Classic Coke

Time for a new SKU from Microsoft, they do love the confusing array of SKU's.

Windows 8.2 Classic Coke version , with no TIFKAM and just a start button ( and by that I mean the traditional Start Menu ).

It's what the people want. Give them the choice at boot time/ install. IT'll please desktop and enterprise users and make the critics vanish overnight.

Doesn't bother me as I've Android on my phone, OS X on my laptop and Ubuntu on the desktop , but to be quite honest I'm frustrated with the MS attitude of thinking they know better than the customer. Choice is great, mandatory enforcement and restriction just tarnishes the brand and Microsoft right now can't buy good publicity. ( Win 8, Win Pho, XBox One etc ).

Ballmer needs to start throwing more than chairs.

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Asus FonePad: You may feel a bit of a spanner

Andy Roid McUser
Terminator

Re: Dom Joly - prophet.

How we laughed at Dom Joly's Trigger Happy TV, whilst he walked around shouting into a three foot Nokia. We were all blissfully mistaking a comedy show for what was in fact a peek into the future from our modern day Nostradamus.

Dom Joly is not who we think he is.....

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Techies finger Bradley Manning for US secret files database breach

Andy Roid McUser
Stop

Assange

The best way to hurt Assange is to ignore him.

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Cold, dead hands of Steve Jobs slip from iPhones: The Cult of Ive is upon us

Andy Roid McUser
Angel

Apple Invents

"the fruity giant's iOS 7 is basically a series of odds-and-ends first seen on competitors' devices - and glossed with some Cupertino sparkle to make it shine."

We all see Apple for what they are, but they do have great pixie dust. I wonder what they could do with a turd ?

Genuinely interested to see this new interface, maybe they will invent the 'Back Button' ;-)

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Want a fast, private Wi-Fi channel? Fine, go fight the regulators

Andy Roid McUser
Paris Hilton

Interesting business model

little or no bleed from ch12 and 13, they have 100% coverage of the US ( and the rest of the world for that matter ). Proposal is that the private channel 14 is used to uplink Femtocells, cellular base stations and wifi access points. It's an expensive way to deliver Internet bandwidth but could get it to almost anywhere on earth and provide solid communications backbones.

Global coverage map is something special though even if the latency will suck.

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The toy of tech: The Mattel Aquarius 30 years on

Andy Roid McUser
Go

Re: It got me started

Up-vote for sheer nerd enthusiasm - something sadly lacking in today's comp-science graduates.

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Windows NT grandaddy OpenVMS taken out back, single gunshot heard

Andy Roid McUser
Joke

Hazards of scan reading.

"The architect of RSX-11M and VMS was Dave Cutler, who planned a portable, object-oriented successor, PRISM"

It's a testament to the longevity of VMS that the NSA managed to integrate PRISM into Google/Microsoft/Facebook. Why isn't Dave Cutler answering privacy questions.

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