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* Posts by auburnman

835 posts • joined 28 Jul 2011

Badger bloodbath brouhaha brings 'bodge' bumpkin bank burgle bluster

auburnman
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Re: As ocassionally happens.....

"But isn't that half the fun? Trying to guess what the article is about without reading the subtitle or the article."

I like to read the Daily Mash and reverse engineer in my head what the actual news story was from the parody.

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Speech-to-text drives motorists to distraction

auburnman
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Re: Distracting tasks?

"Driving without due care and attention" can only be used to book someone AFTER the police catch a driver doing something stupid like weaving into the other lane or scraping the kerb. To get the mobile ban into effect the police filmed numerous incidents of people on mobiles in less than full control of the vehicle.

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Sony sucker-punches Xbox on price, specs, DRM-free gaming

auburnman
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Re: Steam?

Consoles have always been about ease of use and portability. Your game would work just the same when you took it round your mates house. Locking a game to an account is a fundamental betrayal of what a console is. There has been a slide towards this with downloadable games but that came with the upsides of easy access to free demos and the like, and it was always alongside discs that could be loaned out or sold on at your whim.

This latest step smacks of doing DRM Hollywood style - punishing paying customers with a locked down 'guilty until proven innocent' mentality which will end up pushing paying customers towards piracy.

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auburnman
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Locking games to accounts

I can see XBoxers attempting to continue game trading by having a throwaway user account for each game and trading those.

Account: Halo9Account_95864812

Nickname/gamertag/whatever: Halo 9

Chuck Norris

123 Fake Street

Beverly Hills 90210.

Then MS will crack down on accounts that only have one game registered to them, the internet mobs will go off their tits and someone will start a class-action lawsuit against MS for all this.

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auburnman
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Re: Waiting for "Kinect: PRISM"

They want it on all the time, my money is on turning it off at the wall being more hassle than it's worth.

"Your XBone has recovered from an unexpected power loss. Please sit there doing nothing like a prick for the next three hours while the hard drive is checked and 500 mandatory patches are applied."

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All major UK ISPs prepping network-level porn 'n' violence filters

auburnman
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Trollface

Re: Oh good

'timeporn' (no spaces)

I know that was probably a typo, but it's set my mind wondering as to what timeporn could be. A code for Dr Who fanfic porn? Maybe Marty McFly & doc Brown? Or people having sex with timepieces?

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Who should play the next Doctor? Nominations needed!

auburnman
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Re: Ben Cumberbatch

You'd have to have him basically be Sherlock though. Snapping at anyone near him and doing scathing put downs alongside the investigation. Would make a good change from the recent cheery/zany all the time. Do you think they could get Martin Freeman as an assistant as well, or is he still busy being a Hobbit?

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Exclusive Halo game coming to Windows 8 and WinPhone 8

auburnman
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Re: Meh.

> two weapon limit, regenerating health,

It's not a bad system in and of itself, it's the industry doing it to death and being too god-damned afraid to try anything else that has induced the current yawn fest. Keep in mind, back in the day the two weapon health regen system WAS something new. It's also the fault of gamers (myself included sometimes I admit) for lapping it up while really good shooters that try something new wither on the vine (like the surprisingly good Bulletstorm which died an undignified death.)

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Ex-Microsoft man plans brand of consumer marijuana 'fine cigars'

auburnman
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Trollface

Re: Don't be fooled! (Eadon Pavlovian response)

You forgot to put the last line in allcaps.

ALLCAPS LAST LINE MEANS I MEAN BIDNESS

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Stand by for PURPLE KETCHUP as boffins breed SUPER TOMATOES

auburnman
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Re: the key question....

If we're genetically engineering tomatoes, we should fix them so they taste like bacon.

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Security boffins say music could trigger mobile malware

auburnman
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Music triggering dangerous payload

Isn't that the plot of the (absolutely abominable) Eagle Eye?

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Orange customer clobbered with SIX-FIGURE phone bill

auburnman
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"However data charges are not available in real time"

The pathetic thing is that appears to be true for Orange employees but not for customers. When I got massively overcharged for data (Like ten quid for a minute on Google maps, not bum-squeaking letters demanding thousands fortunately) and I phoned up Orange to complain, the poor call centre sod couldn't see the data charges yet even though I could view the charges ON ORANGE'S OWN WEBSITE at the same time.

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Peak Facebook: British users lose their Liking for Zuck's ad empire

auburnman
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Re: Hotel Facebook

"Every advert I get on FB...gets reported as being sexually explicit."

That'll just get your feedback logged as malicious and ignored. I would say it's better to honestly select "Just not interested" in all the ads for cars, stock trading etc. If everyone did that FB would be put in an awkward position when they try to drum up ad sales for the new Lexus or whatever and the advertiser wants to see data on the level of interest /engagement with ads.

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If you've bought DRM'd film files from Acetrax, here's the bad news

auburnman
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Facepalm

Exactly. It is astonishing that 'the man' has still not twigged that DRM hobbling on paid-for media is the gateway to Bittorrent, not a preventer.

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Review: Sony Xperia SP

auburnman
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Unhappy

When did a £300 phone become a mid-price model? F me.

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Computer use irrelevant to education outcomes, says US study

auburnman
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Stop

Re: @auburnman (was: Only computers?)

Yes I do gripe if a computer can't connect to the internet in a learning situation. Because a kid might have no technical aptitude whatsoever, or come from a family who don't already have an internet connection and genuinely can't afford to get one for their kid.

There will be youths out there like you who will fall in love with the technology itself and will do whatever it takes to get it working and hopefully go on to a wonderful career in IT. But for every one of those there will be many more children who are left with an overpriced doorstep when they could be learning about Physics or Chemistry or history or even just browsing Wikipedia or watching shitty manufactured boybands on Youtube - you never know what might kindle an interest in learning more.

You seem to ignore the opportunity for learning outside of the IT sphere. Just the slightest bit of extra investment could have opened up a whole new world to disadvantaged children.

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auburnman
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FAIL

Only computers?

Obviously they were too scared to provide computers AND free internet access, the combo that really would have made a difference to any kids that had a thirst for learning. Hell, if you gave me a computer tomorrow that I couldn't hook into the web, it would go in a cupboard until I needed a portable DVD player. If the study is limited to ONLY the provision of a computer and nothing of the surrounding infrastructure then the study is useless.

You might as well give me a free car with no insurance, no tax, no licence and no MOT and draw the same "it makes no difference" conclusion when I don't use it.

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Hey, Teflon Ballmer. Look, isn't it time? You know, time to quit?

auburnman
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Windows

Re: Balmer is safe because...

Maybe he's a placeholder until Elop finishes reducing Nokia to a minnow that MS can snap up for a pittance. As a reward for single handedly ruining an entire company with nothing more than blind loyalty to MS he will be welcomed back into the fold and given the throne when Ballmer retires.

</bored paranoid speculation>

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US boffin builds 32-way Raspberry Pi cluster

auburnman
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Re: Fans overkill?

That's an eighth of a fan Per RP. Keep in mind they'll be in close proximity, so the heat radiating out from one will meet heat from another 7+ coming the other way.

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Nintendo throws flaming legal barrel at YouTubing fans

auburnman
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Re: The Wii U is dead

Opening up the Nintendo Crown Jewels of Mario, Metroid, Pokemon etc to other platforms could massively revamp the company.

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Half of youngsters would swap PRIVACY for... cheaper insurance

auburnman
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Stop

STOP PRESS

Young people make short-term decisions without regard for hard to see long-term consequences!

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Boffins find world's oldest virgin water trapped in Earth's crust

auburnman
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Re: I wonder if the bacteria in them holes ever thinks.....

Indeed, the ones that have been around for a while and have done a few rounds with penicillin and it's descendants are the more worrying.

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Google 'DOES DO EVIL', thunders British politician

auburnman
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Re: Tax on business is fair

People are defending Google because they didn't do anything illegal. Most people defending Google agree that they should pay tax, but if the powers that be are going to drag them in front of a commission, they need to bust out something more substantial than the 'immoral' bullshit that basically amounts to an embarrassing "You have been a naughty bad man and we don't like it."

This whole thing is a sideshow to actually fixing the international tax system, which no-one wants to touch because it'll be a nightmare of conflicting treaties and interests to unravel. Which is a shame because we definitely need the government to stop whining about the flood damage while they watch the house continue to flood.

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My god, what's that STENCH belching from your iPhone?

auburnman
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Re: I can see the future...

I dunno - the hypothetical people who would buy this thing and the refills for it, if they exist, strike me as the type who could be convinced to buy a new turd to refill their box.

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Amazon launches own currency

auburnman
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Re: Marketing gimmick (@JDX)

"I may be wrong but I'm sure on PS3 if I want to buy film rentals or downloadable games, the ONLY way to do this is via PSN points which you have to buy into your 'wallet' first."

That's Microsoft points on Xbox. PS3 works off good-old fashioned (well, electronic) money.

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Borked your iDevice? Pay EVEN MORE to have it fixed by Applecare

auburnman
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Bring back article ratings

I wanted to uprate this article after "advice to the calm and collected commentators known to gather in [forums]" made me crack a smile.

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Icahn and Southeastern try to hamstring Mike Dell's buyout bid

auburnman
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Confused

In what way can it be claimed that Dell is buying Dell from Shareholders "with their own money?"

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M&S shoppers make quarter of a million NFC payments a WEEK

auburnman
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Re: M & S considered "posh" and "high end"?

"That doesn't make any sense at all. I purchase quality goods, not brand names."

So do I. My point is, high prices = high end, regardless of brand name.

"Higher quality than WHAT, exactly?"

Than other UK supermarkets selling similar goods.

""*Whether or not that the quality increase is worth the price jump is subject to opinion"

And yet you shop there anyway? Why?"

I never said I did. My opinion is that most of their ranges are overpriced, but I go in now and again for a look. I do occasionally buy jackets or shoes there because I find their kit highly durable.

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auburnman
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Re: M & S considered "posh" and "high end"?

That's because they can't charge a premium while they are trying to break into a new market.

Over here, M&S ARE high end because they are an established name that can charge a bloody fortune. Their goods are undeniably higher quality as well*, it's not just a marketing thing.

*Whether or not that the quality increase is worth the price jump is subject to opinion

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P2P badboy The Pirate Bay sets sail for the Caribbean

auburnman
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FAIL

Misclick FAIL

That was meant to be a comment for the AC who mentioned Assange.

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auburnman
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Trollface

That's an interesting point - if he genuinely believes that the US is out to get him, what better opportunity would they have to snatch him than when he is in self-imposed hiding? If the Yanks really wanted to rendition him they could cut a deal with (Ecuador?) Smuggle him out of the Embassy somehow and fly him out on a military plane from one of the bases they rent. The Embassy staff pretend for as long as they can that JA is still with them, until years later when they claim he left in the middle of the night trying to flee the country.

He could be in gitmo now!

No tinfoil hat icon?

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UK.Gov passes Instagram Act: All your pics belong to everyone now

auburnman
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Unhappy

Ominous...

...but from the article it does look like there are a number of options to resist this and try and get it repealed. Here's an angle that occurred to me - if works with no metadata have lesser legal rights now, could the big organisations such as the BBC who routinely strip metadata before using works be reasonably accused of fraud?

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Hey, monkey: Just 'cos your mates eat FOUL corn, YOU have to eat it too?

auburnman
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Joke

Re: Bananas and Monkeys

This is also why I am banned from Edinburgh Zoo.

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Reg hack to starve on £1 a day for science

auburnman
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Facepalm

Re: Soup.

Leaving you with no money for breakfast... all week...

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EE: Of course we're going to get 1m 4G users by the end of the year!

auburnman
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Trollface

"new, cheaper contracts (of course, leaving the 318k mugs on whatever daft tarrif they've committed to)"

I would dearly love to see them try to do this - not because I want those 318k to suffer, but because the inevitable backlash from the public and the various fair trade bodies would be a thing of beauty to behold. The telcos are already under scrutiny for the lockin contracts that allow them to jack up the prices - if they actually lowered prices but stiffed anyone already committed to a contract the consumer rights organisations would tear them a new one.

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auburnman
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Coffee/keyboard

SPIT TAKE

>£30/Month for a capped connection SIM ONLY with 2 years lock-in? I'm surprised punters haven't been beating the doors down on their shops to get to this deal. </Sarcasm>

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App reads The Indie's dead-tree pages - so you don't have to

auburnman
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WTF?

Playing with new toys...

Seems to be a convoluted solution. Could they not have done more or less the same thing with QR codes linking to their articles?

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YouTube beats off $1bn Viacom copyright case once AGAIN

auburnman
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Holmes

MegaUpload is probably half the reason this is still going on. Hollywood won't want a ruling in favour of safe harbour to get legal precedent.

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US Justice Department pushes for fairer spectrum auctions

auburnman
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Don't sell the spectrum

Rent it out on a use it or lose it basis.

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Malware and domain-squatters target Boston Marathon bombing

auburnman
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Westboro

As the only scum to actually appear glad that these bombs were 'sent', perhaps the police or FBI would like to detain some members of the church for questioning? Catch them at the memorial service and cart them off.

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Logitech launches MEGA-PRICEY 15-in-1 remote

auburnman
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They'll need to crack on with making more products like the hub that can be controlled through your smartphone before smartphones finish the job of making remotes (near) obsolete. Get a look at this £200 remote if you can, because it and it's ilk are poised to be a thing of the past.

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Smart metering will disrupt weather forecasts, warns Met Office

auburnman
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Re: real savings?

Yes, because all that refining is actually just a job creating exercise. We just slip someone a bribe to look the other way, tap the pipeline for a couple of barrels of crude which goes straight into the heating tank. Job's a good 'un.

Back in the real world, the further North you get in Scotland the more expensive the fuel gets as it has to be driven further from the refineries.

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auburnman
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Joke

Smart metering update

This is an automated SMS from Smart Metering Central. Based on our usage statistics and tracking of your mobile it appears you left your home more than 1 hour ago but left some devices on. To improve your efficiency and save YOU money, your smart meters have automatically powered down the following devices:

LOBBY LIGHTS has been powered down

TV has been powered down

FRIDGE FREEZER has been powered down

CRITICAL SERVER 24/7 has been powered down

Thank you for allowing Smart Metering to assist you in being more efficient.

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Will Google's rivals swallow the 'labelling remedy' pill?

auburnman
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Black Helicopters

Re: Can we all stop pretending

"...can probably be tricked into doing my dirty work for me."

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Sonic the Hedgehog

auburnman
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Facepalm

Re: Not enough Tails love

Miles "Tails" Prower, as the Title Screen called him. I didn't get that until YEARS later. He was at least as cool as Sonic.

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auburnman
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Unhappy

Re: Water levels...

Sudden flashback to desperately trying to scale the blocks that shifted under your feet and got in your way in Chemical Plant Zone as a 2 floating above my head becomes a 1...

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auburnman
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Happy

Up Down Left Right A+Start. Remember that off by heart to this day. I miss the good old 16 bit Sonic games. Might have to dig out my old emulators.

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Mali to give away .ML domains for free

auburnman
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Won't this just land .ml on blacklists across the Globe?

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BSkyB punters drown in MASSIVE MYSTERY Yahoo! mail! migration!

auburnman
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Trollface

Re: Here's a thought...

SSHHH! It's Friday and I'm trying to raise a pitchfork wielding mob to alleviate the boredom. You and your rational explanations are not helping.

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