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* Posts by Lallabalalla

437 posts • joined 23 Jun 2011

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Bendy or barmy: Why your next TV will be curved

Lallabalalla
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All this proves is that TVs are TOO BIG

No-one should have a screen larger than 46". They should just stop making bigger ones.

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Google's Nest halts sales of its fire alarm – because waving your hand switches it off

Lallabalalla
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Boffin

ALL smoke alarms operate that way

And I know this for a fact, becuase I have had every smoke alarm ever made... OK not quite, but I've had lots over the years and every one *without exception* will stop beeping if you wave a teatowel/newspaper/any kind of fan under it after you've burnt the toast. So waving your hand is a natural thing to do to shut the thing up.

My current alarm (one of them) is wirelessly hooked into the house alarm system so if it goes off we get a call from an operator within 20 seconds. If there's no response, or we shout "Holy Crap Call The Fire Service" at them, they call the fire service. That's connected enough for me, but it does rely on the phoneline being up, since I didn't stump for the control unit with the 3G connection in it.

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Oxfam, you're full of FAIL. Leave economics to sensible bods

Lallabalalla
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Facepalm

"We already redistribute wealth by taxing the rich"

HAHAHHAHAHAH now I *know* this article is a troll.

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Blurred lines: Android e-ink mobe claims TWO-WEEK battery life

Lallabalalla
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Unhappy

"older users find actions like pinching, tapping, double-tapping and swiping confusing"

Citation needed. As a 58 yr old snr developer currently doing mobile, I don't seem to have a problem. My wife's dad is 83, he seems to cope fairly well. Older than what, exactly? Time itself?

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Plusnet goes titsup for spectacular hour-long wobble

Lallabalalla
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It wasn't just plusnet

BT Infinity was stupidly slow last night - so slow in fact that speedtest.net stalled out halfway through and wouldn't complete a run. When it showed anything, it showed peaks of around 1.1Mb - average about a third of that at best, with lots-o-nothin (tm) in between :(

Roll on the cable guys - they're coming on Monday...

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Booze and bacon sarnies: A recipe for immortality?

Lallabalalla
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Joke

All this bacon talk - Won't somebody think of - the beer!?

And I have it good authority that, according to chemistry, alcohol IS a solution.

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Update your Mac NOW: Apple fixes OS X 'goto fail' SSL spying vuln

Lallabalalla
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Gimp

It seems there's no fix for my iPhone4

as it still has iOS6 on it, and it will be sold with it on (at a premium I suspect) when the 6 comes out and I get one. (If I don't get a Galaxy 5 that is. Or a Heuwei ?!?). I have been steadfastly ignoring the iOS7 "update" since it first appeared as I have no intention of converting my perfectly serviceable phone into a laggy, power-hungry partially non-functioning brick, thank you very much.

IMO the 4 & 4S should NEVER have been pushed iOS7. It's been written off elsewhere as a cynical ploy to get otherwise happy Apple owners to fork out for new hardware when it really wasn't needed.

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Apple Mac Pro: It's a death star, not a nappy bin, OK?

Lallabalalla
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If it goes wrong...

The short answer is, don't buy it from Apple. Buy it from your local friendly certified reseller (I could name a very good one in North London - no affiliation...) and they will happily pick it up, fix it and deliver back PDQ, free of charge. They may even have loan machines (I have *no idea if this is true but it wouldn't surprise me). NB They will do this even if you DIDN'T buy it from them. If it's Apple + Applecare (ie in warranty) then no problem.

Stand in line at an Apple Store? Actual LOL!

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Lallabalalla
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Gimp

Final Cut Pro X?

I thought this was now a dead-in-the-water amateurs-only "app"? There's SO many youtube vids deriding it.

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Object to #YearOfCode? You're a misogynist and a snob, says the BBC

Lallabalalla
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Re: The Turtle Moves!

They still do, kinda - on a windows laptop, using drag n drop building blocks of logic - in year three.

My [now 8yr old] has since moved on to playing with string concatenation/interleaving and basic calculators using the cheapest tools of all: javascript and a text editor, and a browser.

He thinks building a simple addition calculator was very cool - and was amazed by a loop that printed out something 10,000 times :)

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BBC, ITV gang up on YouView with 'FreeView Connect'

Lallabalalla
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Humax freeview box

I have the old SD one which still gets used for SD broadcasts - I've been wanting the HD YouView one for some time as being HUMAX it's probably the best of them - but what's put me off is not the price, it's the many many crappy reviews on Amazon, which make it sound like a far inferior product to my old SD one. 3 minute startup time? Yeesh.

So I bought a Sammy "smart" TV and it has all the player apps anyway. So who needs it?

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Man sues NASA: Mystery Mars rock is a UFO – an unidentified 'FUNGUS' object

Lallabalalla
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Windows

David Eycke! David Eycke knows the answer

Somebody should put them in touch.

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Volunteers slam plans to turn Bletchley Park into 'geeky Disneyland'

Lallabalalla
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Re: Whilst I want Bletchley to keep going

+1 for having been "an actor in a fish museum" :)

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Vile Twitter trolls thrown in the cooler for rape abuse tweet spree

Lallabalalla
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Re: Would it be too much...Rosalind Franklin

Rosalind Franklin's boss Wilson got the other third of the Nobel, in fact. Franklin had been dead 4 years and it's not awarded posthumously, I believe.

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Apple: That 'white screen of death' nightmare? We'll fix it... AT SOME POINT

Lallabalalla
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"not covered by Applecare"

Hmm. Applecare claims to be for all device hardware, and I've never had a hardware problem that wasn't covered. If it were me I would be in contact with head office PDQ quoting their T&Cs at them and I bet it'd get fixed. "Geniuses" they ain't.

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CERN boffins fire ANTI-HYDROGEN BEAM

Lallabalalla
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Re: “The spectra of hydrogen and antihydrogen are predicted to be identical"

And another! Sorry did I Bohr you? Haha stopit you ar slaying us etc

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Lallabalalla
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Re: “The spectra of hydrogen and antihydrogen are predicted to be identical"

Haha two thumbs down? Who do you think you are, Einstein and Schroedinger?

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Lallabalalla
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“The spectra of hydrogen and antihydrogen are predicted to be identical"

Really? The spectra of anything depends on quantum theory. They could equally be utterly different. Or similar enough but instead of emitting light could be emitting anti-light ie this dark energy they are always banging on about.

It could even be that an electron jumping to an outer orbit gains dark energy from an anti-electron jumping to an inner orbit and somehow converts it to light energy when it jumps inward again.

It's also possible that dark energy and light energy are the same apart from our perception of it since nothing has any properties at all until it is measured in some way.

Usually I prefer to say hang the sense of it. I never got an award for Norway but I'd rather be happy than right any time.

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Lallabalalla
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Re: What's with that?

Spectroscopy depends on the jumping of electrons from outer to inner orbits (releasing energy ie light packets in different wavelengths), and magnetism affects this behaviour.

FYI The fact that light can be released in a non-continuous packet (or quanta) AND have a continuous wavelength is the stuff of quantum theory.

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Apple-aligned firm opens sapphire glass factory. iPhone 6 rumours, DEPLOY

Lallabalalla
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Re: sapphire glass scratches ?

Check the (Seiko) spec. Could be "Hardlex" which I don't think is quite the same thing.

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Anatomy of a 22-year-old X Window bug: Get root with newly uncovered flaw

Lallabalalla
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Re: It looks like NO ONE ever audited X Windows

"a programmer that spends ages thinking about the problem then codes a solution that turns out to be a g'awful mess that takes ages to fix" -??

I could name quite a few of those, believe me!

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Lallabalalla
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Re: It looks like NO ONE ever audited X Windows

Yeah, but "client libraries trusted servers to send valid data" ! That is SUCH a schoolboy error. Literally.

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Ho, ho, HOLY CR*P, ebuyer! Etailer rates staff on returns REJECTED

Lallabalalla
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Trollface

the term 'rejected' can easily be taken out of context here and escalate

..., especially on social media channels. Channels like The Reg? Which specialises in taking things out of context? #justsayin

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Apple iWatch due in October 2014, to wirelessly charge from one metre away – report

Lallabalalla
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Re: iWatch ? I cannot believe

" Tissot make a model with thermometer, compass and barometer which is indistinguishable from a a normal 3-hand wristwatch; touching the face at 12, 3, 6,or 9 causes the hands to display that information instead of the time."

Wish I could afford one of those!

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Lallabalalla
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Re: When I were a lad ...

I still have one, and am getting another soon as I quite fancy a diver's style watch (Seiko SK007 or similar) as I like the idea of actual clockwork, er, clocks. Never needs a battery, self-winding, and surprisingly accurate. Not as accurate as my solar-powered quartz seiko which doesn't need batteries either, but within a minute or two is good enough for me.

Now then, that "designer's impression" picture: It's round. OK. So who has a perfectly round wrist? Nobody. Fail...

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iSPY: Apple Stores switch on iBeacon phone sniff spy system

Lallabalalla
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Don't care about "surveillance"

DO care about being relentlessly spammed.

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Apple prepping 4K resolution 12.9-inch MaxiPad – report

Lallabalalla
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FAIL

Re: The ipad's big fail

I regularly "carry" 10s of Gb of docs and music around in this funny little app called Dropbox.

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AIR TIME! Our expert cosies up with the new top-end iPad

Lallabalalla
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Re: An upgrade?????? You're joking right?

Or you could just add an SD card adaptor, and give yourself - you know - removable storage.

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Pop OS X Mavericks on your Mac for FREE while you have LUNCH

Lallabalalla
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Re: @Philip Storry

Where's a link for that, then. Accordng to Apple you do it through the app store. There's no link on their website that I can find.

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Surface 2 and iPad Air: Prepare to meet YOUR DOOM under a 'Landfill Android' AVALANCHE

Lallabalalla
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Re: I think you mean

What utter BS - these things are all made in the same places by the same people in the same circumstances. Are you seriously suggesting otherwise?

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'Please, steal my phone' TV ads by T-Mobile US slammed by legal eagles

Lallabalalla
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Holmes

Note to self

remember to tell my kids what strangers "asking the time" actually means, and how to deal with it.

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Why a Robin Hood tax on filthy rich City types is the very LAST thing needed

Lallabalalla
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Megaphone

tl;dr

The buggers make WAY too much money, our country is falling apart from lack of it, and they've got it all. Give it TF back!

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BT Mobile inks network deal with EE, dumps Vodafone

Lallabalalla
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Great deal BT

Currently you get a choice of two "great" kinda average handsets and a whole 10Mb data. An extra half a gb os only £5.70. Go BT! No really - just go.

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Boris Johnson's ex-right-hand man's right hand lands johnson in web slip

Lallabalalla
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Re: Pix or it didn't happen.

I saw a pixellated version the other day, before they were all taken down. Yes, it was him. It wasn't the face that was pixellated ;)

OTOH who really cares. Silly fail and all that, but hoho! Now move on.

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Apple blings up new iMac with latest Intel chips, next-gen Wi-Fi

Lallabalalla
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Gimp

Re: Is it worth over a grand?

Yes.

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Lallabalalla
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OSX on a PC?

mmmmm... maybe not. Back in the day, my mates and I used to drool over Triton motorbikes - hand-built hybrids consisting of a nicely tuned Triumph twin in the legendary Norton Featherbed frame. One day, a friend turned up on his Triton - a Norton engine in a Triumph frame... oh how we laughed. And no, it wasn't any good. When it worked at all.

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Lallabalalla
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Gimp

Microsoft on a Mac

Yes, because there's some decent Windows software that people need or want to run (ever tried using Pages as a proper word processor? Really??), but Windows boxes are awful by comparison. Cheap, shoddy, short-lived, buggy and no resale value. Makes perfect sense!

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Lallabalalla
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Re: Never again

My Pure internet radio bust its power socket a month out of warranty. They told me to throw it away and buy a new one off them at a discount (which was still more than retail), because they wouldn't fix it. They never fix anything, it turns out - if it's in warranty you get a refurb or something, if not you can get stuffed.

Never Again!

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Lallabalalla
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Re: CD/DVD drive @jdx

The kind of retard who reads the whole post and realises that the punchline is about the screen. *Your* kind of retard, fellah.

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Lallabalalla
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Gimp

CD/DVD drive

Oh surely you remember - it's the thing that imports CDs and movies and stuff that other people have made for you into the computer, and allows me & the kids to make our own movies which we can show to Grandad or watch in the car or anywhere or post to rellies, which we use ALL THE TIME, so PUT IT BACK you CHEAPSKATES :(

Otherwise that is NOT an all-in-one as it has peripherals hanging out of it, so don't call it that. You might as well call a mac mini an All-In-One - hey just add a CD/DVD drive .... and a keyboard ... and a mouse ... oh and a screen.

I suppose it does get around the problem that a lot of people found that the "superdrive" was very unreliable and expensive to fix or replace, as now you can just throw it away and plug in a new one. But I don't really think much of that "solution".

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First look: Apple iPhone 5S and 5C

Lallabalalla
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Headmaster

Yes, thats definately it!

My smartphone has a dictionary, too. Which tells me how to spell "definitely", should I need to look it up. Maybe you need a better phone.

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Apple beckons fanbois back into its golden era... of, er, 2010

Lallabalalla
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Gimp

Re: Apple support versus an Android: you usually have to go to a CM build.

That's the problem right there. WTF is CM build, and who the hell cares? I just want my phone to work, and when it doesn't, give me a new one (or an identical refurb, I don't care) within 10 minutes, please, as I have stuff to do that doesn't include finding out about "CM Builds" and how to install them.

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Peak Apple: Has ANYONE at all ordered a new iPhone 5c?

Lallabalalla
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Mushroom

choose that over a HTC One?

I'd choose a pair of tin cans and a piece of string over an HTC One. What a piece of junk!

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Nokia's 41Mp Lumia 1020 'launches' in UK - but hoi polloi must wait

Lallabalalla
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the Nokia blows the Xperia Z1 out of the water.

On that evidence I'd say the opposite. the Nokia is too dark, too contrasty and the colour rendition at night is just bad and wrong, the sony looks very natural by comparison.

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Tell me why I don't like Moon days: Bob Geldof heads into SPAAACE

Lallabalalla
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Friggin celebs on charity jollies telling us how spend our hard-earned....

Tch!

"The flights have been organised by Space Expedition Corporation and World Privilege Card, which are raising the money for Arms Around The Child"

Why don't they just give all that cash to the charity, solve the kids-with-HIV thing and buy their own space fights?

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Apple quietly revives iPhone charging and syncing docks

Lallabalalla
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Gimp

Audio output

AFAIK there is still audio output through the cable, but NO VIDEO. This FWIW is why I'm not interested in a 5/5C/5S, as I like to dump my phone on my hifi - which has a DOCK... and links to my TV, so I can download and watch movies from it. I *suppose* I can continue to use my old iPod for that when my phone finally dies and needs replacing. Going to be a good few years yet though touch wood.

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Decks and plugs and rock and roll: Tascam CD-A750 cassette and CD combo

Lallabalalla
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Boffin

Re: Buy old records

Thumbs down for that? You clearly have no appreciation of sound quality. Buy vinyl - japanese pressings - masters - put them on your Rega3/Linn Sonndeck and turn it up - preferably through a Leak amp and a massive pair of old Tannoys.

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Lallabalalla
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Happy

Buy old records

Sorted

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Furious Frenchies tell Apple to bubble off: Bling iPhone isn't 'champagne'

Lallabalalla
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Joke

They should call it "rendre fromage coloré" in France

Or just "fromage" - that's usually yellow - ish - innit.

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Compact Cassette supremo Lou Ottens talks to El Reg

Lallabalalla
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Re: Ah, cassette tapes...

And not forgetting the magic inherent in the pocket degausser.

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