1315 posts • joined 16 Jun 2011
I wonder if Mrs gnome would let me bolt a space plane to my MPV?
Jolly well done all ---->
Oh, and did you decide on your tree protector backronym thing?
It's simple, what we all need is a DNA lock.
Then we wouldn't need a PIN, and the thieves would need a vial of blood or summink.
Oh hang on............I think I have just legitimised police assisting people down the stairs.
I pay my council tax, so answer the damn question already!
How many times has sacrifice come up as a legitimate answer for getting housing approved?
I think the main issue is that if you are giving a presentation these days then the audience of tie wearing free sandwich munchers assume that that you are a project leader. And we know how supremely awesome they are.
which harvests energy from body fluid like sweat
Like sweat huh? So a million boys bedrooms will have self powering flash-lights soon?
This latest cock up has resulted in the following txt
Hello. The 4GEE phone plan you've moved to doesn't come with an inclusive add-on. You can buy a content add-on by visiting .......
Hmm I think they have not told the whole story.
Rainbow Braces at Half Hast
You see Ork is a planet. You follow the Big Dipper til it comes to a dead end then you hang an up.
*and anyone that wants an IT angle, then just check twitter, I like to think that Robin would me smiling at the fact that the numbtards have mixed him up with Stokes Robbie #Angel
@I ain't Spartacus
Maple syrup eggy bread with peanut butter and cheese (extra mature) it's simply awesome
Pancakes or waffles with cheese and fried egg is also for the win.
Basically we should go into business as potato croquettes are the king of potato breakfast items, unless you are sitting down to an Olympic at little chef.
As for vege products, basically quorn all the way if you can handle the incredibly loud farting afterwards. Fake bacon is OK, but only if you like the taste of frazzles. If you are having a vege fry up then have everything else in a bigger portion size and side step the meat.
Re: So basiclly,
"biscuits and sausage gravy"
Oh, you mean scones, except the way you have them is more akin to a cobbler.
Bypass Arbour Protective System
So it's definitely helium then?
What am I going to do with with all the shares in hydrogen?
And when can we buy merch?
Oh, I see
next question - why the fuck would I want to be in London?
And does Uber halio do an app for the buses? with all these leaps of technology I am totally confused.
What the fuck is a london bus?
Re: Stu 4
The pleasure and delight of a Greater Anglia experience.
I think everyone should have the pleasure.
Recently I was shouted at by a chap who told be not to vault the staff entrance barrier at Norwich. He melted down when I suggested that he didn't have a sign saying I couldn't vault the barrier. I don't think they like me much on their notwork.
Bless you Mr D
You must of known that I am at my second progenies birthday and released this early.
Dral, or is it Durl, or maybe Daram
*all are acceptable if I get a coffee at the end of humiliation.
And now you have infected me
because I read it on here
Paris, obvs - >
so it's american bacon - yuck
Even as a British vegetarian I can attest that yank bacon is gross
Oh just fuck off already
Bloody stupid prove you're a human bullshit.
Why not ask a knock knock joke or something else. I am so fed up with stupid CAPTCHA, and don't even get me started on the audio versions.
My pleasant passport chap tried this on a recent trip to LA...
His opening gambit was - spain are out of the world cup, now I don't give a rats ass about such things, but I immediately feigned an interest.
His second question was about what I did for a living, I was terrified as I work for IBM, and he wanted to know exactly what I did. I tried to make it sound exciting, I think I got away with it to.
But what freebies did you get?
When can we buy SPB merch?
I want to shop my support with a stratodangle!
No streetview of the locations you actually want!
Bloody amazing chap - I'm just pleased he didn't have to squeeze gulls for precious sustenance.
I think a lot of people are missing the point on this and are too happy to bash apple.
Currently in you Accessibility settings you can have the flash go off when you receive a message and the like. As the flash is a little harsh it can sometimes be obtrusive, so maybe a pulsing apple is a good addition. Same function, just gentler.
Hmm no tell me, does your android / winphone or blackberry do that?
This is also my view, the empire may of seemed scary at first but they brought about and end to piracy and trade stability. The Jedi were a bunch of fence sitters, telling people what to do but not actually doing much themselves. Basically they didn't give a rats ass about the massive deaths that they caused by going against galactic peace.
You have cheered me right up
Last weeks article was a bit meh, but this one......hang on I have a text.
Oh, it's nothing. Jeez your nosey, OK it was from my mate Jaime, yeah her, not my wife. She never texts unless she wants milk. My wife that is, sometimes jqaime messages me about pasta, I think that's because I said once I like pasta. I also like breast and painted toenails, does this mean I should ask her next time she's over from America? Oh where was I ....Oh yes, I quite liked reading this on.
Hang on, another text, oh it's a video on iMessage....Hmmm Seems she knows about breasts.
Re: Verizon can STFU & FOAD, Kthxbai.
Truly it may me the land of the free (they are not) and the home of the brave (more like the make do)
But the fact is the average Joe is continually been fucked by whoever they get there services from. When you have a country as big as the USA it seems that they are more controlled. They don't have the choices of the free and modern world. You only have to look at how much they pay for a piss poor service to realise that the roll out in a smaller country such as the UK is actually great value.
Yes we in the UK will moan about connection speeds and rural fibre, but seriously at least our nation can afford a phone in every citizens hand, and a decent data connection to use.
I hope you're cattle-prod proof
This cabinet game was a proper bonding game, so many randoms met as a kid down cleethorpes.
Re: Dammit Lester!
Nope - I mean Del Taco, I wouldn't set foot in a Taco Bell.
I want a shrimp taco now......why doesn't the UK understand the importance of mexican food?
If I start a kickstarter for a Del Taco where should I put it, and who would want to be in on it.
Re: I think there's a moral to be derived from this story
Have an upvote
I have now invested in an android burner phone, erm for testing purposes....@Jedit, you are now my alibi
Hmm can you....
fly them close to a kerb for all those up-skirt shots? - Daily Mail side bar, I am thinking of you.
On a serious note, I like the tech in camera drones, but the invasion of privacy is just a bit creepy. I would much rather that drones just kill and mame, at least you can hate them properly without been tied up in privacy and stuff (OK perhaps not as serious as I had hoped)
of the what happened next meme, just wish I could remember what the article is about.
Don't be silly, she doesn't even know what a computer is, although it might be her friends hacking the down vote system.
Like so many comentards...
Why doesn't this wanker fuck the fuck off.
*for American readers, Wanker simply means a masturbater. If that doesn't sit well with you then please think of Rupert as a claw fisted cock juggler
In honour of spaced
We still are getting fleeced, just by a multitude of ways.
Whilst I have no experience I do fancy living in Miami, and I hold an excellent data retention record. In fact I am so tight with data that no one gets any emails!
is such a disappointment, if Dabbsy is going to advertise things then I expect much much better.
No wonder he's all miserable, someone should kick him in the glasshole, and then snapchat it or summink!
Is it wrong that I like to see ladies with pipes?
And does it have a particular name?
*Mrs gnome has a pipe that I insist she chews on when she is doing her degree work, well now she's on her forth I figure she has every right to be boffinised.
I used to think that Musk was a massive cock....
And then he gave his patents away, and built a rocket, and actually turned out to be a decent chap.
AND NOW THIS! Any donation to open a Tesla museum gets my vote and yet another reason to give the guy a hug.
If they ran a web campaign to help the funding I would actually give a few quid, I have a massive soft spot for the father of the modern world. This has made Friday a bit better.
Hey Musk, I'm buying you a cold one -------->
This is simple plumbing....
poor water pressure but massive drains for effluent.
I guess Verizon totally enjoy taking the shit and leaving their customers unwashed.
Would this make it a Kellogg phone?
Tasty Fruit and Fibre?
*I'm going, and I didn't have a jacket, I just sorta dropped it at work.
Whenever I see Seal i now think of the french for seal.
hey, it makes me laugh!
will this create inner city dogging, no park required?
is it only me....
that sniggers when they read PNAS?
Re: Top Gear
I can believe that, after all my comments are written by a team of egotistical ramblers
Makes you wonder what other data the BBC accidental give away.
I smell NSA interference, Snowden was right or summink
It will be called Mega-City and will be policed by judges
Re:Computers don't have safe words
oh, but my computer does have safeword, and I am buggered if I can remember the phrase
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