I would settle for a new 'Tie Fighter' game, with today's computing power it could be awesome.

EA please omit DRM, micro-transactions, DLCing the shit out it and always connected requirement and you have a winner.

The test

He should be placed in a room with 10 boxes of which 9 are booby trapped to kill instantly on opening. He should then be asked to identify the safe box and open it using his amazing gadget.

If he can do it 3 times then let him go, seems fair.

If he refuses he should have a grenade shoved up his arse, minus the pin, and booted down some stairs.

Ahhhhh "Lab-on-DVD" misread it - thought it was a porno.

Samsung's new Galaxy S 4: iPhone assassin or Android also-ran?

Am I allowed to say I could not give a shit?

Boring

Zuck, call the world press next time you have a shit ... that might be mildly more interesting if a little aromatic/toxic.

Let me ...

... quickly adopt my 'not convinced' pose.

An ounce of sympathy in the house for MS anyone? .... hello? ........

..........................tumbleweed...............................

iSnooze

I must admit I am getting a little tired of the i(Device) naming convention, I know it's Apple but for me it's getting a tad cheesy.

Off for an iDump.

An ounce of sympathy for apple in the house? ...............

............ tumbleweed.....................

"Please bend over sir, this will be quite painful"

Off topic - kind of

I would still like to punch MZ's punchable face

I have just telepathically sent my views on this subject to all readers.

Nothing? pfft ... 'normal' freaks.

OT

For me, MZ has a really punchable face.

€600 for failed attempted download by a 9 year old?

Next stop, the 'Thought Police'

12 hour stint, 2 hour nap .... respect lost :)

Interesting article on fanboyism here - http://techreport.com/blog/21294/the-science-of-fanboyism

You need to wake up people and stop feeding the greedy multi-nationals.

"Mum!! where's my Symbian forever t-shirt?"

Can somebody stop the world please, I want to get off.

What does this guy know? What a jerk!!!!

(up) yours

Steve B

Where is the fun in these pants?

Nothing gives me greater pleasure than releasing a sphincter destroyer then tricking a work colleague into grabbing a gobful of my noxious gases.

After reading it was apparent that carrots do in fact sit a long time in the gut, I am sure I have not eaten any for a week.

"The embarrassing security hole"

Warning, understatement alert detected.

All very childish I am just glad that Apple don't make cars.

Not read article, read headline, immediate thought, 'fuck off Apple'

Does this really justify an 'event'?

Tefal are holding an event in New York next month unveiling their latest can opener, getting giddy thinking about it!!

disappointing=finding true value

Glad to hear they are sorting out the mobile ad issue and will soon be able to swamp mobile devices with ads.

Cheers Mark.

Does advertising really work? Seems most people, short of ripping their own testicles off with a claw hammer, will do anything to be rid of the damned nuisance.

"PHOTOS OF 'IPAD MINI' BODY STIR RUMOR POT"

Really? Some people need to get out more.

Does a picture of Ballmer exist where he does not look a complete arsehole?

Tesco and Facebook roughly the same value? What a joke.

I have unconfirmed news that Judge Koh has ordered that the Apple and Samsung representatives be issued handbags as they enter the courtroom for the remainder of the farce.

I read an article about Bitcoins and the fact that one guy had invested all his life savings in Bitcoins.

My immediate thought was 'what an idiot'.

My Windows Vista/ME 'shit OS' detector is going crazy at the moment.

I have just done a shit, that could be described as modern and fresh as well.

I dusted off something I invented a few years ago, an 'out of depth meter', and switched it on to see if it is working. You just point it and it whistles loudly if 'out of depth' is detected.

Never sure if it ever worked correctly, what I really need is an expert in their field and George Osbourne so I can calibrate both extremes of the scale accurately.

Re Facebook

Mark Z has a permanent look of 'I cannot believe this is happening' etched on his face, I am with him on this one, I cannot either.

Happy spending Mark.

Mistake? Yeah right, let's make some extra profit off the back of her death - shameful.

Giving Netflix a try at the moment and the picture quality is pretty good. The selection is pretty poor, kind of like when you rummage around in the bargain DVD bin at your local Spar.

Enjoying misfits at the moment though I will cancel before the trial end, Robocop 1,2 and 3 .. that is scraping the bottom of the barrel IMO.

Murdoch is a role model for the devil, Rupert has suggested that he needs to work on his 'evilness' as he is coming across as caring and humane.

What a waste of eggs, I love them dippy style.

'Not as daft an idea as it sounds because dotted across the British Isles are 32 Leaf dealers the majority of which have an 80A fast charger that will get your battery to 80 per cent of capacity in 30 minutes.'

Disagree, that is daft - hanging round in a car dealers for 30 minutes is an incredibly difficult challenge, 5 minutes is just about bearable.

iGames do have a 'dump time' appeal to be fair.

King kong's finger

... when I take a dump a play angry birds or cover orange, when I want to play a real game I switch on my pc/xbox/PS3 ....

dance and shout and convince nobody

a desperate man in action http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvsboPUjrGc&NR=1

watch out for the groin/hamstring tweak at 22seconds. A truly embarrassing display, like when you are younger and your dad gets up to dance at a wedding.