* Posts by Anonymous Coward 101

1025 posts • joined 16 May 2011

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Whitman's split: The end of Fiorina's HP grand expansion era

Anonymous Coward 101

"...Leo Apotheker was hired in September 2010, and promptly proposed turning HP in to a software company, soon introducing the radical idea of spinning off the PC business.

This was too much for the board and investors, and Apotheker was gone within a year..."

Rather like saying the VW boss resigned because of some disagreement to do with environmental standards.

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Has Voyager 1 escaped the Sun yet? Yes, but also no, say boffins

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: the "solar system"

Seems like a pointless discussion, really. When does summer become autumn?

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Bacon can kill: Official

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: US anything Meat I agree

"No chemicals just natural salt curing."

Chemicals, then?

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Edward Snowden denies making a deal with the Russian secret service

Anonymous Coward 101

"...but didn’t say how much because “it would probably violate some customs’ declaration”.

Whatever, Ed. We believe you.

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Ex-Autonomy CEO Mike Lynch sues HP for $150m+

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Risky strategy

Dead Irish writer. Supposed to be quite good.

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NASA announcement of MAJOR MARS DISCOVERY imminent: WHAT can it be?

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Ocean 1001001

That is borderline interesting - so it won't be that. NASA hype the shit out of everything.

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Police Scotland fingered for breaching RIPA code 'multiple' times

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Scotland?

Agree the photo was a crap choice, but The Register often just stick sometimes daft stock photos at the start of their stories.

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BBC Micro:bit delayed by power supply SNAFU

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Why new hardware?

Because mumble mumble halcyon days 80s British computers blah blah Raspberry Pi.

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NHS site defaced with screed protesting Syrian conflict

Anonymous Coward 101

Aren't we getting on for 4.5 years of massacres in Syria?

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Ashley Madison wide open to UK privacy lawsuits, claim lawyers

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: What?

"the women are very busy..."

You know what? I imagine some of the women on the site actually are very busy...

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Now Ashley Madison hackers reveal 'CEO's emails and source code'

Anonymous Coward 101

The hackers were doing it wrong...

They should have released the database bit by bit, thereby imposing greater pressure on AM to pay a ransom.

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Reddit caves to Russian fungus censorship demands

Anonymous Coward 101

I thought it was supposed to be that someone posted a krokadil recipe. Now it's some shit about hallucinogenic mushrooms. Big deal.

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Assange™ is 'upset' that he WON'T be prosecuted for rape, giggles lawyer

Anonymous Coward 101

The sheer chutzpah...

...of this announcement takes the biscuit.

Julian Assange is a prick of the highest degree.

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Anonymous Coward 101

Re: WTF?

"Is he an innocent man on trumped up charges, the victim of dirty tricks by the US government, or some mix of both?"

Or even - it's ridiculous, I know! - guilty as fuck and has successfully eluded justice?

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Exploding Power Bars: EE couldn't even get the CE safety mark right

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Desperately bad and irresponsible pair of articles

I suppose it is 'sort of' bad that EE messed up the CE mark, in that you want attention to detail in these products. The photo apparently shows the letters too close together, not that anyone would doubt what the logo meant. Couple of other issues with the story:

1. The text on the government website that is linked in the article clearly - when in context - relates to products that have been given a CE mark when they do not qualify for one.

2. What was the point of referring to the 'Chinese Export' issue, given that it is irrelevant to the matter at hand? Is The Register suggesting that EE intentionally messed up the 'CE' marking so they could claim it meant 'Chinese Export'? That would be a serious issue, but nothing suggests they have done this.

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AIDS? Ebola? Nah – ELECTRO SMOG is our 'biggest problem', says Noel Edmonds

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

Do me a fucking favour.

Reread this quote: "The biggest problem we have is not Ebola, it’s not Aids, it’s electro smog." How many people has 'electro smog' killed in those three African countries?

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EU squashes bogus copyright scare as red-faced Guardian slaps down Wiki's Wales

Anonymous Coward 101

"How can you tell Jimbo is lying? His lips are moving"

Did El Reg's lawyer approve that sentence?

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DOUGHNUT (donut?) and whale FOUND ON PLUTO

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Data rate from Pluto

I should see what mobile company this space probe uses - that's a much better signal than I can get.

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Chair legs it from UK govt smart meter installation programme

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: What benefits and to whom?

"Total supplier benefits amount to £8.57bn and include avoided site visits (£3.18bn), and reduced inquiries and customer overheads (£1.24bn)."

I wonder what the total increase in cost of site visits (sales forces etc.) and inquiries (fuckups etc.) has been since deregulation?

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Revive the Nathan Barley Quango – former Downing Street wonk

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Attack of the Clones

I recall reading a wee while ago that the soap Eastenders ought to change to 'better reflect the people that now live in the east end', or words to that effect. I thought it was about having more ethnic minorities on the program, but after reading on they actually meant having more poncy yuppie type people on the show.

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Don't believe the hype: When that DATA seems just too good

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Here is the "plan 9 from outer space" of all papers.

That abstract reads like comment spam. I expected a link to a dodgy luxury goods retailer at the bottom.

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Look out, law abiding folk: UK’s Counter-Extremism Bill slithers into view

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: One party state

Also reintroduce fox hunting, because fuck yeah why not?

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Anonymous Coward 101

I love how the Conservatives, taking cognisance of the fact most people didn't vote for them, have started with a moderate agenda that nobody will find too controversial.

More realistically, whether or not they like them now, I have a feeling that most people in this country are going to hate this government by 2020.

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The world's first proper Bitcoin exchange will be live in a month

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: "Built by Wall Street professionals,"

Aye, because bitcoin has been a model of probity and competence before now.

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Cash register maker used same password – 166816 – non-stop since 1990

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: customers should conduct rigorous penetration tests

You use your smartphone to go around mainframe and implant a nanovirus.

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Blighty's 12-sided quid to feature schoolboy's posterior

Anonymous Coward 101

It would be a lot easier to create the fake ones if they didn't keep changing the design. I expect this new design is a lot more difficult to counterfeit.

OT, but you never see many £2 coins these days.

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BACK OFF, spooks: UK legal hacking code should be 'resisted at all costs' says lawyer

Anonymous Coward 101

The Picture

Is there any explanation for why the picture used in this story is of a gentleman listening to a telephone in the guise of a shoe?

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Hated smart meters likely to be 'a costly failure' – MPs

Anonymous Coward 101

How can this possibly cost so much?

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Sick of Chrome vs Firefox? Check out these 3 NEW browsers

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: New browsers pop up all the time.

"I remember installing Cello on Window's 3.1, though that was the last time I used Windows."

Truly, we have a nerd god in our midst. How may we worship you?

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MELTDOWN: Samsung, Sony not-so-smart TVs go titsup for TWO days

Anonymous Coward 101

Smart TVs Suck

My mum got a new Toshiba smart TV recently, and the BBC iPlayer app was incredibly jerky. The novel solution was to get a Roku stick which worked perfectly. The smart TV 'functionality' will never be used again.

Why can they not get things to work correctly out of the factory?

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So long, Lenovo, and no thanks for all the super-creepy Superfish

Anonymous Coward 101

'Normally Lenovo performs due diligence on all software it preinstalls...'

'How many pennies are they giving us?'

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UK official LOSES Mark Duggan shooting discs IN THE POST

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Follow proper procedure

If suitably encrypted, files sent through Dropbox are fine. If unsuitably unencrypted, files through the post are unfine.

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Anonymous: Snap on that Guy Fawkes mask, we're marching against child sex abuse

Anonymous Coward 101

Mental

We will never know what was in Geoffrey Dickens dossier, but I suspect a civil servant would have looked at it then tossed it in the bin. Dickens was a total crackpot, and in a sane world would be ridiculed by Anonymous.

The following links are perhaps instructive; it is interesting that these aspects of Dickens are not mentioned in recent mainstream news stories, perhaps because they would undermine the 'paedospiracy' agenda:

http://swallowingthecamel.me/2011/07/29/the-prodigal-witch-xi-audrey-harper/

http://www.saff.ukhq.co.uk/dickens.htm

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IBM to cut '118k jobs worldwide' – report claims

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Axe the axe!

At least it makes sense, unlike some pictures used. IBM cuts - and so do axes!

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Cubans defy government's home internet ban with secret home-made network

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: No wonder Obama wants to thaw relations

The only thing worse than being monetised is not being monetised.

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Broadmoor: My Journey Into Hell, The Chimes and Cowboys and Indies

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Fuck Bronson

Cos he were harsh to the nonces, innit?

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Is it humanly possible to watch Gigli and Battlefield Earth back-to-back?

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: Devil

Shylaman's films have become progressively shit. The Sixth Sense was good if you didn't guess or hear about the ending, and from that point on every film he has made was worse than the one before it. Indeed, the IMDB ratings from every film he has made from The Sixth Sense onward almost keeps to that rule.

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Anonymous Coward 101

Mac and Me

British gangster films from the late nineties and early noughties, with a handful of exceptions.

Mr. Nanny

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Microsoft just saved Windows Phone... Now stop whining

Anonymous Coward 101

Microsoft's handling of Windows Phone has been inept

It should either invest money to make it work, or kill it off. This crucial decision must be made no later than 2012, which is a shame as we are now in 2015. Also, there is no point being in the low end, fighting with cheap Android's.

My 1020 is great, but I won't be getting a Win Phone next year if these is no clear replacement.

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SFO: 'Insufficient evidence' for conviction over HP-Autonomy deal

Anonymous Coward 101

Knowing the SFO, Mike Lynch would have needed to machine gun HPs offices before they would bring charges.

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Which of UK's major ISPs will let you have exotic p0rn? NONE OF THEM

Anonymous Coward 101

I'm trying to understand how the headline and the content of the story are related.

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Mt Gox Bitcoin baron: I was NOT Silk Road boss Dread Pirate Roberts

Anonymous Coward 101

Kapeles is widely suspected of being behind the 'hack' of bitcoins at MtGox, aside from this allegation. It will be fucking hilarious if he turns out to be Keyser Soze. It would be too crazy to be fiction.

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Demon Internet goes TITSUP: Outage borks ancient ISP

Anonymous Coward 101

Do they have something to do with Tesco Broadband?

Because that has been down nationwide all day as well, but has recently come back up.

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Tesco preps for Big Data Engine dump: Laters, Clubcard dev

Anonymous Coward 101

Dunnhumby are getting flogged, because they have nothing to say about customers that don't come into Tesco because they are too fucking expensive.

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Hackers pilfer $5 MEELLION in BTC from Bitstamp

Anonymous Coward 101

FAITH IN MATH...

...and a couple of guys that look like this:

https://i.imgur.com/XVRTdeS.jpg

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Snowden leaks lack context says security studies professor

Anonymous Coward 101

Powerpoint is Bad

I hate Powerpoint. It is frequently the worst tool for the job. Whenever I have to refer to an old Powerpoint for something, I find myself cursing the idiot that created it. Why couldn't they have written a brief note in prose to be referred to later, instead of arcane slides that have no information?

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El Reg tests portable breathalyzers: Getting drunk so you don't have to

Anonymous Coward 101

Re: In the UK

I was recently tested in Scotland, and was asked whether I had a drink in the previous 20 minutes, but not the cigarette question. Had three cans the previous night and the result was zero, so happy days!

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GCHQ: We can't track crims any more thanks to Snowden

Anonymous Coward 101

So before Snowden...

'Drug lords' sent messages in clear text to one another:

'Senor Mendoza, nice to speak with you! Could you send round a ton of cocaine to Milford Haven for next week. Please tell me the name of the boat it's on. Ta.'

I don't think so.

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US Navy's LASER CANNON WARSHIP: USS Ponce sent to Gulf

Anonymous Coward 101

There is a cracking episode of Horizon available on iPlayer, called the Race to Ruin. It dates from the 1981-82 series, and is about the US military industrial complex. Laser weapons are shown in the episode, and it explains why they are not practically viable (at least in the early eighties).

It's great. Watch it.

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Anonymous Coward 101

Re: It was named after the explorer Juan Ponce de León

So, they could have called it something pretty cool - the USS De León - but they called it the USS Ponce instead?

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