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* Posts by Ray 8

54 posts • joined 6 May 2011

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Silicon Valley comes to China to spur tech innovation

Ray 8
Holmes

hmm

Have they run outof things to steal then?

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North Tyneside: Mega-outsourcing deal will SAVE jobs

Ray 8
Thumb Down

outsourcing doesn't work

The staff will end up demotivated, poorly paid and not having the right skills to get the job done resulting in high staff turnover. This will reflect poorly on the client who will have to pay a large amount to get the issue resolved to the profit of the supplier.

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Airline leaves customer on hold for 15 hours

Ray 8
Pint

get revenge..

Best way is to mess with their metrics. Call them and hang up after a few seconds. Having too many dropped calls doesn't look good for them.

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Battlefield Earth ruled worst film EVER

Ray 8
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Avatar

reminds me of Dances with Wolves with Stretched Smurfs

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Tech Mahindra to swallow Satyam in BILLION dollar deal

Ray 8
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Outsourcing is bad

They will still get away with bringing in cheap staff under the Visa Scheme..

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US teens confess to 60-a-day texting FRENZY

Ray 8
Gimp

RSI

Im waiting for the ambulance chasers sueing the phone manufacturers

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US Navy preps railgun for tests

Ray 8
Mushroom

bah

your mighty rail gun is no use under water...

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Yahoo! shares! leap! on! asset! sale! gossip!

Ray 8
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Yahoo email

Your Yahoo emails are now property of the Chinese government. Just wait for them to let their cyber army access all your business and personal emails

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US military pays SETI to check Kepler-22b for aliens

Ray 8
Alien

welcome mat

Seeing that we have been transmitting radio signals for about 100 years, we have another 500 to prepare the <weclcome to Earth / We Surrender> mat

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Biology miss punts homemade smut to pupils

Ray 8
Paris Hilton

mmm

is she hot?

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Hubble snaps mystery green death nebula in NGC 1846

Ray 8
Alert

lense

maybe the lense needs wiping

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Cisco to HP: 'Stop suing former staffers'

Ray 8
Thumb Down

no work...

oh by the way, your job is getting offshored and we will sue if you go work for the competition..

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It's ALIVE! Broken Russian Mars probe finally answers calls

Ray 8
Terminator

offline

14 days is enough time for the yanks to launch their muini shuttle to make some modifications

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Mystery radioisotopes in Czech air are not from Fukushima

Ray 8
Mushroom

duck

Use the tried as tested duck and cover.. That will save you from the mad mullahs nukes

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Secret US 'Jedi' ghost-copters kept out of bin Laden raid

Ray 8
Alien

ghosts...

Playmobile or it didnt exist

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Americans' right to hang fake balls on trucks left dangling

Ray 8
Happy

AC/DC

Im in the mood playing AC/DC Big Balls very loud

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Apple shouldn't bother with TV...

Ray 8
Mushroom

iTV

Imagine the damage a 2 year old could do to a 42 inch ITV Touch screen

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'Occupy Wherever' movement goes transgalactic

Ray 8
Pint

Porkins

is on disability allowance so he doesn't have to work at all. If he eat McD's all the he will have severe flutulence, halitosis and other takeaway induced maladies.

He probably doesn't smell too nice either.

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Did a Seagate sales bloke just say 5TB drives are coming?

Ray 8
FAIL

quality..

Their quality went down the pan when they replaced all the techies with bean counters and people with business degrees

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Boffins place living creature under control of brain chip

Ray 8
Terminator

Brainzz

when zombies are defetaed following World War Z, we can use these chips to train a number of them for mundain taks suchs as cleaning sewers and streets.

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Oz Territory terrorized by MUTANT CANE TOADS!

Ray 8
Pint

Poison

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/10/30/toad_licking_dog/

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NASA releases stunning new moon-landing snaps

Ray 8
Alien

mmmm

Interesting to note that both old and new pictures were taken from from the same position and angle.

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Sweden rolls out invisible infrared tank

Ray 8
Mushroom

hmmm Counter nuke

the yanks will develop new tech to counter it and then use it to obliterate anything that moves with 100 square mile radius (civilians included)

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New UK 'leccy meters remotely run via Voda 2G

Ray 8
Alien

tin foil

not for me but for the meter as everyone is out to get it..

can try and find a way block the signal just to piss em off

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Greyhound spatters Nashville with semen

Ray 8

well..

tickle my prostate

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China Mobile becomes world's biggest mobe operator

Ray 8
Holmes

Profits

I wonder if the books are being cooked to look good

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COMET WILL DEFINITELY NOT HIT EARTH – NASA

Ray 8
Mushroom

No need to panic..

until NASA report that it is decelerating..

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DARPA drops another HTV-2

Ray 8
Alien

meanwhile.....

in ancient egypt.

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Stieg Larsson: Oxfam's number one best seller

Ray 8
Mushroom

Dan Brown books

I wonder what will happen when the Dan Brown and Stieg Larsson books reach critical mass.

One possiblilty is that they will condense into one big steaming turd

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Pacific rare-earth discovery: Actually just gigatonnes of dirt

Ray 8
Boffin

hmmm

Given the environmental record of Japanese firms, I wonder what will happen to the acid and red mud.

Waiting for a response from Greenpeace on this issue

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Xboxer SWATTED by armed cops after online spat

Ray 8
FAIL

Sue Micro$oft

You can sue Microsoft for not providing adequate security to protect your personal details...

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'Robots can save America', says Obama

Ray 8
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Robots..

How will Corporations stay in business when their customer base has been replaced by robots and have no income to buy their products?

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Your NFC tap-pay phone: Soon a movie or train ticket too

Ray 8
Paris Hilton

NFC in Gregs

That iss a lot of sausage rolls to buy in order to use it....

Paris coz she likes sausage rolls

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The KILLER MUTANT FUNGUS in YOUR DISHWASHER

Ray 8
Boffin

cleaner

Cillit Bang will clear that Fungal Infection...

They use the stuff to clean de-commisioned Nuclear reactors so it should kill off the Toadstool invaders from your dishwasher

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Mink coat thief conceals booty down knickers

Ray 8
Paris Hilton

nooo

Just thinking about the mechanics of it is making me go blind...

Paris coz she hides it well

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FBI fat-thumbs data centre raid

Ray 8
Big Brother

Cloud

All hail Cloud Computing until the Feds show up and take your data

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HP: Apotheker rolls more heads

Ray 8

hmmm

Finally he is cutting the dead wood. I wonder how many more Hurd-ittes are still left there?

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Whitebox tablet sales surge smacks down iPad

Ray 8
Gimp

lifespan

anyone know the lifespan of the Fondleslabs or iClones?

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New 'liquid smart metal' can go hard or floppy

Ray 8
Alien

commercial uses

does this have commercial implications or just the fantasies of hollywood

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UK watchdog looking into Facebook face-tech row

Ray 8
Big Brother

mmmm

Since my profile picture is a clown and my other pictures are of animals and inanimate objects. How would the software work?

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FARTING DEATH CAMELS MUST DIE to save the world!

Ray 8
Coat

as long..

as long as the dont get the hump...

OK I know I'll get my coat

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Breaking wave 'big as the USA' spied on Sun's surface

Ray 8
Pint

hmmm

Wonder what Keanu Reeves would say

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HP threatens Oracle with legal action for jumping Itanic

Ray 8
Gimp

wondering

I wonder what Mark Hurd has to say about this.

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Barnsley clamps down on foul-mouthed fu*king locals

Ray 8

WTF

<Bland response to article containing colourful expletives>

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Stealth hovercraft armada poised to invade South Korea

Ray 8
Mushroom

Hovercraft...

more than likely the "hovercraft" are really airbeds with generic fans attached powered by made in China car batteries

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Cloud in 2011: A bright new dawn...

Ray 8
Alert

Scenario....

What would happen if they had a mirrored Data centre in another country and said country went in a search warrant looking for questionable data?

You could end having your commercially sensitive data in hands to foreign coppers who may/may not sell the data onto their business pals.

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Radio 4 bumped off Freeview by Gaelic TV

Ray 8

I wonder

how many of the people who posted message here are from Scotland?

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Who's nicked Vaz's fondleslab?

Ray 8
FAIL

locked...

Standard practise in the private sector is to secure the laptop to the desk using a kensington lock for his laptop as for his fondleslab check MI5 as they will be downloading the log files to check where he has been.

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O2 money-phone set to go live this year

Ray 8
Pint

only matter of time.

... before the hackers figure out a way to steal your virtual cash without you knowing it

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David Davis: Jobless should dig trenches for fat UK pipes

Ray 8

diggers

Knowing BT they will use the Intra-Company Visa system to bring in "staff" from a non-EU country where staffing costs are much less

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