* Posts by Evil Graham

890 posts • joined 8 Jun 2007

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'Revenge porn' bully told not to post people's nude pics online. That's it. That's his punishment

Evil Graham
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Re: Not sure who is being punished the most here...

I'm not a violent person, but that surely is one punchable face isn't it?

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Switch it off and on again: How peers failed to sneak Snoopers' Charter into terror bill

Evil Graham
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People just aren't angry enough

I imagine like many of us I have friends who are techies and probably more friends who are not.

My technically-aware friends get angry about these rampant abuses of technology that infringe our human rights, but the non-tech people generally don't because they just don't understand it.

And here's the problem. Imagine the government presented a new bill saying that all cars had to be fitted with GPS trackers so that we know where they all are (because terrorists use cars - and it's fine, because we aren't going to look *in* the car, just see where it's going). Naturally there would be uproar and such a law would have no chance of being passed, because people understand the implications.

But when it's applied to something less tangible like the interwebz - well that's just a murky pool of jargon and complexity. And anyway it's only my cat videos and Skype sessions with family in Australia. If I've done nothing wrong, I've got nothing to fear and all that.

These are the attitudes we are facing.

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Dark Fibre: Reg man plunges into London's sewers to see how pipe is laid

Evil Graham
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Gives new meaning...

... to the phrase "laying a cable".

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Is it humanly possible to watch Gigli and Battlefield Earth back-to-back?

Evil Graham
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Re: I always

Have an upvote for Girl on a Motorcycle. I was very young when I watched it but it stirred something in my loins for both girls and motorcycles.

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Microsoft: Flunked our test? Fear not, techies...

Evil Graham
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Re: @Evile Graham Second time?

In my defence:

- I found the article via Google.

- The Telegraph didn't do the survey, Continental Tyres did.

- The first search result was actually the same story in the Daily Mail, so I spared you that at least.

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Evil Graham
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Second time?

"The best drivers are generally considered to be those who passed their test on the second time of asking (ahem, this writer included)..."

Being a cynical person, that sounded to me like an urban myth propagated by people who failed their first driving test.

However, there does seem to be some evidence behind it: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/news/7260489/Safe-drivers-have-already-failed-a-driving-test.html

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SECRETS of the LOST SCROLLS unlocked by key to HEALTHY BOOBS

Evil Graham
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Re: Wouldn't it be great....

I bet it says "ROMANES EUNT DOMUS".

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MYSTERY RADIO SIGNAL picked up from BEYOND our GALAXY

Evil Graham
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Re: Contact

"Ever seen a didgeridoo?"

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Evil Graham
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"Unless the event is traveling towards us very very very quickly?"

That would be news in itself, as everything else in the universe is moving away.

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Facebook poaches design talent from Toronto firm – fate of staff unknown

Evil Graham
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"Oh don't come over all high and mighty. I'd do the same..."

I'm sure a lot of people would. The point here though is the generic PR-speak that tries to pretend the move was made for higher goals, rather than just a massive bucket of cash.

I tried to read it all, but it seemed to be written in "wank".

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Amazon's tax deal in Luxembourg BROKE the LAW, says EU

Evil Graham
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Re: EU "law"

"When I were a lad, you needed some kind of democratic legitimacy to create law."

On the contrary, I would like to see *more* separation between our government and the judiciary.

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US and UK declare red-team CYBER WAR – on EACH OTHER

Evil Graham
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Will it be like the pwn2own contest?

Like, if you successfully break in to a bank you get to keep it?

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Missing defective BEAGLE FOUND ON MARS! Amazing claim

Evil Graham
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Re: Next step

It's been there a while now, so it's probably acquired a wheel clamp and a "Council Aware" sticker.

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Preserve the concinnity of English, caterwauls American university

Evil Graham
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"I assume you had the teacher taken out and shot?"

He certainly should have.

Come to think of it, if we are to accept that modern usage replaces "have" with "of" (and I am having a bit of trouble accepting that, but never mind), how are we supposed to indicate the abbreviated form in written English?

For example, I can write "she should've been shot" and that would be fine, but I have yet to see anyone write "she should'f been shot".

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What do UK and Iran have in common? Both want to outlaw encrypted apps

Evil Graham
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"Yup, and we voted them in."

This is only true for some values of "we".

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India digs deep to bury neutrino-hunting chamber

Evil Graham
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Re: mutated neutrinos

Perhaps your downvoter didn't get that this is a reference to the risible Hollywood disaster movie "2012", in which that very thing happens.

Look out for Dara O'Briain's critique of this awful film, which was part of his live stand up routine a while ago. Very funny.

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Lube company merger receiving second 'in-depth' probe

Evil Graham
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Real concerns

Sheldon Mills, CMA director of mergers, said: "Durex and K-Y are two very well-known personal lubricant brands.."

He's right. Everyone else is just a johnny-come-lately.

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BILL GATES DRINKS 'boiled and treated' POO. Ah, 'delicious'

Evil Graham
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Re: nothing new here

"Only one of the class took up his offer to do the same. Ironically, that person went on to get a Phd in Chemistry."

I shared a flat with some medical students once. I'm pretty sure they would have drunk it on the way in.

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Hire and hold IT staff in 2015: The Reg's how-to guide

Evil Graham
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Ooh, get you and your bonus

"I’m reminded of the cheque for £100 I once received from an employer for 10 years’ service"

My missus got £100 from the NHS for 30 years service. I think it was one of those cases where "nothing" would have been the better option.

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DON'T PANIC! Latest Anonymous data dump looks old hat

Evil Graham
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"Okay, I am back on board with the images in stories now."

I fully agree. In fact I think *all* stories about any kind of hacking should be attributed initially to Anonymous, at least until we know for sure it isn't.

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You have a 'SIMPLE QUESTION'? Well, the answer is NO

Evil Graham
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Lost train passengers

The reason you attract hordes of needy travellers at train stations is simple: you can't possibly be less helpful than the people who work there.

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Untangling .NET Core: Open source for Windows, Mac, Linux

Evil Graham
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<whatever> is the future

None of this sounds like a terribly bad idea, but Microsoft have had too many of these epiphanies. Every time they change direction, they leave behind armies of developers who have invested sweat and money in the last-greatest-thing.

People are going to take a lot of convincing this time.

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Tor takes off the gloves after sustained staffer harassment

Evil Graham
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Anyway, back to the point

I read the statement a few times and as far as I can tell, the main thing that they are going to do is "fuck all".

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Sonic BOOM: 10 blast-tastic soundbars

Evil Graham
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Re: £800 for a SOUNDBAR!

That's more than I spent on the telly.

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Europe's top court mulls vandal's right to privacy after bloke catches thug on home CCTV

Evil Graham
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"Well, you probably aren't going home any time soon... ;-)"

Or you might be going to a lovely new home, where the weather is much hotter and everyone wears an orange jumpsuit.

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Put me through to Buffy's room, please. Sony hackers leak stars' numbers, travel aliases

Evil Graham
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Re: Just wondering

I do this in reverse, and travel everywhere under the name of "Sarah Michelle Gellar".

You should see the the looks of disappointment when I turn up.

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Plusnet customers SWAMPED by spam but BT-owned ISP dismisses data breach claims

Evil Graham
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Re: Multiple addresses are a doddle

"NAH, not that easy for most... going to gmail or yahoo is much easier"

FWIW you can do it with Google mail as well. Gmail supports aliases with a + separator, so if you are myname@gmail.com you can also be myname+plusnetarebastards@gmail.com

Not nuclear-hard, but it tells you who's leaking your stuff.

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Adobe appoints former Reg man as open-source chief mobile lead

Evil Graham
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Re: The shame. The shame.

Damn. I needed "synergy" for a line.

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Sky: We're no longer calling ourselves British. Yep. And Broadcasting can do one, too

Evil Graham
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I'm waiting for BBC to follow suit

Wouldn't it be great if they were just called "C"?

"The Corporation". Cool.

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Bible THUMP: Good Book beats Darwin to most influential tome title

Evil Graham
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Re: The Bible

You can't deny it shifted a load of copies though. With that level of success I'm surprised they didn't do a sequel.

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Redmond aims to outshine Eclipse with FREE Visual Studio

Evil Graham
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It's not really competing with Eclipse though

Eclipse may not be perfect, but its openness takes some beating. I can develop in pretty much any language I want, on any of the major platforms (and some quite minor ones), and target everything from an Arduino upwards.

So not the same thing at all really.

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My HOUSE used to be a PUB: How to save the UK high street

Evil Graham
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Re: Pubs already being converted

Ditto. Many pubs being converted to flats round my way.

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Hacker Hammond's laptop protected by pet password

Evil Graham
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Not much of a deal was it?

"Hammond [...] was sentenced to the maximum 10 years prison under his guilty plea deal"

I'm not all that familiar with the US legal system, but this implies that he did a deal and pleaded guilty, which is usually done in exchange for a lighter sentence.

So how come he got the maximum stretch? What would they have done if he pleaded not guilty, sentence him to more than the maximum?

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Samsung slams door on OLED TVs, makes QUANTUM dot LEAP

Evil Graham
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This argument has been made before

About cinema and television.

Why would people troop off down to the flicks to watch a big screen, when they could all have small personal TVs at home?

Sure, cinema attendances declined for a while and people changed their viewing habits, but the essential big screen experience didn't disappear. It just got augmented by other formats.

You can rinse and repeat for many other "new" technologies.

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Interstellar: An awesome sci-fi spectacle – just cut the hamminess, please

Evil Graham
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Re: Why does humanity deserve to survive?

It must be Lager Loving Lesbians then.

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I am POLICE SERGEANT L. TORVALDS! Stop or I'll SHOOT

Evil Graham
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You have the right to remain silent

But anything you do say may be distributed widely on various forums and used to beat you up until you write some decent code, or die a horrible death. Whichever comes first.

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Virgin 'spaceship' pilot 'UNLOCKED tailbooms' going through SOUND BARRIER

Evil Graham
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Re: "Wealthy customers have signed up in large numbers to see a black sky "

They could just stand on their money...

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MEN: For pity's sake SLEEP with LOTS of WOMEN - and avoid Prostate Cancer

Evil Graham
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Re: Straight vs Gay

"...the experience that is my first prostate exam"

In an amazing coincidence I had one this year on the same day that the vet had to rectally insert a digit into our dog.

Judging by the look on the dog's face, we both felt the same way about it.

On the plus side I feel our shared trauma has bonded us in a way that outsiders wouldn't understand.

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iPad Air 2: Vulture chews on new Apple tablet

Evil Graham
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Yay - death to glossy

I haven't got an iPad but this gave me hope:

"There’s an extra anti-reflective coating on the surface now which goes a long way to answering the age-old criticism of all and every glass screen – the glare from reflected ambient light."

Maybe our laptop screens will get some antireflective love now.

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Kingston's aviation empire: From industry firsts to Airfix heroes

Evil Graham
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Brilliant

And I have to say - "Octave" - that's a *proper* gentleman's middle name.

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Ex-US Navy fighter pilot MIT prof: Drones beat humans - I should know

Evil Graham
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There's always a human somewhere

As we saw on wikileaks a few years ago when drone operators happily blew up a minibus containing women, children and assorted wounded casualties.

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Want a more fuel efficient car? Then redesign it – here's how

Evil Graham
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Re: Hypermiling

"Perhaps I just hate everyone.."

Nothing wrong with that.

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Evil Graham
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What about the fuel injection?

Great article. This car is a prime candidate for junking the ancient ECU and replacing it with a modern hackable unit like a Megasquirt. You could have hours of fun with your laptop, tuning your car for optimum efficiency (or power, or whatever takes your fancy).

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Torvalds CONFESSES: 'I'm pretty good at alienating devs'

Evil Graham
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Frustration

I doubt that Linus stomps round like Malcolm Tucker all the time. From what I've seen, most of his rants are down to terminal frustration, when someone is causing a problem and earlier complaints haven't been addressed.

It's a big project, involving a lot of smart and headstrong people. I bet the same stuff goes on behind the scenes of many tech companies, it's just that you don't see it.

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Martha Lane Fox: YEUCH! The Internet is MADE by MEN?!?

Evil Graham
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Re: NOT MALE

"I know more about electronics / software / computers than anyone I know."

But we don't know who you know.

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Evil Graham
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Re: Utopian drivel

"After all, those people that died in wars to support democracy, also died for our freedom to choose."

Well they died for freedom full stop. In my opinion that should include the freedom to not vote, if that's what you want.

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EE TV: Network snubs 'Auntie's antique' for mobe-happy set-top box

Evil Graham
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Re: Designed their own EPG

"And why does it need two, slightly different, clocks within ten pixels of each other?"

- and a minute apart?

Seriously, I think the top one is built in to the Android tablet's menu bar, so the EPG doesn't know anything about it. No idea why they disagree about the time though.

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HOT BABES! Worried you won't get that JOB in IT? MENTION how hot you are

Evil Graham
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My solemn promise

If I ever see any suitably-qualified, yet stunningly attractive, candidates for our engineering vacancies - I guarantee not to discriminate against them.

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SLOSH! Cops dethrone suspect - by tipping over portaloo with him inside

Evil Graham
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Re: "Well at least they'll have some manure"

Blimey. That told me.

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Evil Graham
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"All four officers have been put on gardening leave with full pay while an investigation is carried out."

Well at least they'll have some manure.

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