840 posts • joined 8 Jun 2007
It's about time MS gave the corporate market some love
Because I sure as hell wouldn't use their stuff in my own time.
Re: Do you get what you pay for?
"I wouldn't care if I just had a cellphone duct-taped to the side for pictures."
Knowing my luck, a firmware update would break the camera when it got there...
Law abiding Mongolians
Good for them, they don't seem to be pirating anything.
Cue the massive trade delegation to fly out first class and find out how they do it.
I think it's a good strategy really
Faced with a decline in public awareness, celebrities have to do get back in the public eye.
Traditionally, this would have involved 3 weeks in the Australian jungle with a bunch of other D-listers, during which you have to eat raw kangaroo bollocks and pretend that Ant and Dec are funny.
So now any sleb with a bit of common sense can bypass all that. Five minutes with a front-facing camera, a carefully orchestrated "leak" and voila - everyone knows your name. And what your arse looks like.
Have an upvote for not liking golf.
The game is bad enough, but even worse are the fucking people who play it.
Not quite true
The NSA will know.
Nice story, but you could have avoided the sports reporter cliche.
Oooh, we dreamed of a coal stove. We 'ad to carve messages into t'rock with our fingernails - and woe betide us if we went over 140 characters or father would strangle us with a charger cable.
Re: Nail on the head.
Hmm. To paraphrase, the original post said "there's poverty in India, so why spend money on space missions?".
My post said "there was poverty in 1970s America, and people said the same thing at the time".
Failing to see the strawman there. Just pointing out an analogous situation.
Re: Nail on the head.
This argument is nothing new. At the height of the space race in 1970, there was a hit song in America called "Whitey On The Moon" - the point being that poor black people were paying taxes and getting not much share of the pie, while the government spent billions putting (white) men on the moon.
I've got sympathy with anyone in a position of poverty who sees these things as an expensive waste, but I don't believe that cutting research programmes would suddenly mean "yay, no more poor people". In the long term, it probably has the opposite effect.
I don't need to worry about this
I got an email from Mark Carney this week, he's the Governor of the Bank of England in case you didn't know.
Apparently there's TWENTY MILLION SIX HUNDRED THOUSAND POUNDS waiting for me to collect. So, in a couple of weeks I really don't think I'll be bothered if someone rips me off for the odd laptop.
Re: How appropriate
Look on the bright side, every minute he's on stage with Apple is a minute he's not making boring records or preaching about something.
I bet he wears his sunglasses indoors as well.
"Consultation" - that's an interesting word
It's the same word, for example, that your employer uses when you are about to lose your job.
When someone says that you'll be consulted on something, you shouldn't ever infer that you are going to get a say in the final decision.
It's difficult to remember all those passwords
So I like to use a handy aide-memoire, such as the name of my dog.
That works very well, but now I am having trouble getting &eT6x_!"%pZ#12 to come back when I call him.
Re: Murakami does chic-lit
"This book was more like a Danielle Steel romance".
That doesn't sound promising, but I'm still going to have to read it because I've liked his other books a lot.
What would you say is the best Murakami book to start with? The first one I read was "Wind Up Bird Chronicle" and it would still be my favourite.
Re: "Slim headlamps can make a vehicle’s exterior appear more determined and aggressive"
"I have come to the conclusion that if I /can/ move aside I will because I have no idea what someone else's emergency is."
OK maybe I didn't spell it out well enough. I don't drive slowly, but I'm not a nutter. I am really very happy to get out of the way whenever I can, but often it isn't possible. At such times, it's kind of stressful to have some spunkbubble in a mid-range saloon trying to ram me out of the way.
And no, I don't believe they are all taking a sick child to A&E. More likely they are just twats.
And Ford isn't helping by making the front of their cars look like angry sharks.
Re: "Slim headlamps can make a vehicle’s exterior appear more determined and aggressive"
“Slim headlamps can make a vehicle’s exterior appear more determined and aggressive”
Speaking as a car-owning driver, I can't help thinking about the even more determined and aggressive middle managers who will driving 2 inches from my arse at 80mph on the way to a breakfast briefing, or a game of squash, or some other pointless wank that they consider to be life-threateningly important.
And no, before you ask, I don't hog the middle lane on motorways.
Re: It wouldn't be so bad...
"Oh, it's a re-run of the football cock-up? That nearly killed ITV, as I recall, with the football on digital TV."
I don't think BT is at risk of going under, but its customers are certainly at risk of more price increases. BT spunked £900 million on 3 years of Champions League coverage starting from next year and they have to get the money from somewhere.
If you listen to their adverts for broadband at the moment they are saying that football coverage is "still free" with their service.
I don't know about you, but that strongly implies to me that it soon won't be.
Re: Mork Calling Orson
"Sad news. When will we take mental health seriously?"
Good point. Depression is a terrible thing. When you think that a man with his success and wealth could get to a point where death is actually the better option, it really makes you think.
There are no quick fixes, but a wider acceptance and understanding of mental health issues would certainly help.
Re: Builders don't put up with this shit
"I think the people who built the empire drank delicate tea from fine china cups"
You're thinking of the people who *ran* the empire.
Re: Scarcely relevant musing
"Does anyone know why 99% of the UK population pronounce latte as "lah-tay"?"
Yes. It's because we don't give a fuck.
Builders don't put up with this shit
A proper cafe opens early, serves artery-hardening fried food all day, only lets you in with a high-viz jacket on, and has tea. The proper sort of tea. Tea that built an empire.
There also might be a rat scurrying along the skirting board, but you can't have everything.
There isn't any wi-fi either, but they do have a copy of the Sun.
Re: Never mind the "talent", what do their HR people get paid?
No need to wonder, it's on the website. Lucy Adams, who was HR Director until April this year, got £320,000:
It would seem that the industrial tribunal got this right, in ruling that the employee was 15% culpable and 85% scapegoat.
The big question is what happens next, given that there's bound to be a compensation payment and that senior management have shown themselves reckless in their knee-jerk removal of the guy in charge of a massively failing project.
Whatever the legal arguments
The monkey selfie on the front page of today's Independent was a beautiful thing which brightened my day.
For that, Mr Slater surely has earned some reward.
"i'm more interested on how 20-30somethings 'now' will fare when they reach retirement age - will they struggle with new tech?"
I don't know, but by then I definitely won't be in a position to care.
"Nah, throw them into an arena with a pointy stick - last one out only gets his head chopped off. Televise it, of course."
Yeah, I would definitely torrent that.
Re: Send to China for warranty repairs?
"I'm sorry, I didn't get your messages, I had to send my phone to China for repairs."
Well if I was going to do that, or use one of my 8 clunkers from the discarded tech drawer, or communicate by standing on a hill and waving flags, I could probably save even more money by not buying a phone at all.
Send to China for warranty repairs?
It looks like a nice phone, but that would rule it out for me. Who can live without a phone for that long?
Re: Just one question
"Is it possible to pledge negative amounts on Kickstarter?"
As it was partly your idea I'm going to have to cut you in on a slice of my new venture, but here it is: Kickstopper.
Basically we come up with really fucking terrible products, and the good people of the Internet have to pay to stop us making them.
Independence will create jobs
But unfortunately only for bureaucrats and politicians.
My stupidest question ever
I remember my first trip to one of our Indian offices. Standing outside having a nice cup of tea at break time, I noticed a security guard frantically beating the shit out of something on the floor with his shoe.
When I enquired of my colleague what the guard was doing, he said "oh, he's killing that snake".
"Is it poisonous?" I asked.
"Yes of course it is. That's why he's killing it".
"Later that day, the management consultants were told to leave and not come back."
My experience of Amstrad products would suggest that they fired the engineers.
Re: Speaking as a CRT user...
"Ancient Nazi Alien Ghosts"
In jest, you have just come up with a programme idea better than 90% of what's out there.
18% for me.
My dentist has got a Panamera, which makes me think I am in the wrong business.
Jaywalking - an artificial crime
I always wondered what the hell "jaywalking" was, and why most countries have no concept of it. Turns out that it was more or less invented by the US automotive industry - apparently it was their way of fighting back against negative publicity when the first cars started killing pedestrians on the roads.
The BBC ran a brilliant article about it: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-26073797
Re: ... a mammoth 2,000 olfactory receptor genes, ..."
"In fact we should replace police dogs and horses entirely with police elephants"
I fully agree. Let's see a drunk football hooligan punch one of those fuckers.
Re: A classic
You may be right about Shatner getting a "worst song" vote on a 1980s radio show, but it wouldn't have been for "Common People", which was only released (in Shatner style) in 2004.
Even the original Pulp version only goes back to 1996.
Anyway, as other people have already mentioned, all Shatner's works are pretty much genius.
Cracking response time frm the local PD
I would never have envisaged getting caught within 3 minutes.
By all means let people have wi-fi and stuff, but let me go in a low-tech section where I don't have to listen to all the self important business twats with their regional sales figures, conference calls and PowerPoint wankery. I can see it now, spread all over the cabin like an extension of their office in a "look at me I'm so important and busy" kind of way.
Also, why can't a 20% larger-than-average person like myself pay 20% more for 20% more space and a 20% bigger seat? Why is the only option Business Class, which is 20% more of everything (and a curtain) for 250% more money?
Re: title is too long
Sadly, iTunes eventually got me to do what it wants.
"Let me see if I can do more damage than Ballmer..."
Well they're going to save money on chairs at least.
Oh, won't someone think of the monkeys?
"Life is great. I am seriously blessed as a motherf****r. A great boyfriend, nice house, monkeys, loving family ... doesn't get any better than this I don't think."
Seriously - there really hasn't been enough discussion in this comments section about the monkeys.
I am trying to get my head round this new version of the American Dream. One day, boys and girls, if you work hard, you can grow up to have a great house, a loving partner, cute kids ... and some monkeys.
It's what we're all working for isn't it?
Re: Can't see the gray area here
In English law (don't know about the US), non-compete clauses are certainly enforcable if they are considered reasonable, relevant and sufficiently constrained to the employer's business interests.
Clauses (like this one) of 6 months or so are pretty common for senior staff, so at first glance it looks like this guy has a problem if he's agreed a six month period but started at Google within a month.
Anyway it'll be interesting to see what happens.
Not just contractors
Most of the same gripes apply to pretty much anyone working in a big corporation, not just contractors. Who hasn't experienced that "Emperor's New Clothes" feeling on a regular basis?
Re: Your Sinclair and Viz
Yep. I will be eternally grateful for Viz and the chuckles it has given me.
I love this
"We have invested less than 0.0001 per cent of our budget in thinking about Facebook Likes."
She got 200 grand and claims to have matched that, so the total budget is about £400K. So therefore they have spent less than 40p thinking about Facebook Likes.
But does that mean they have spent more than 30p? In the public interest I demand to know what they bought for 30-something pence that allowed them to think about Facebook Likes.
Never mind cloud
It's bad enough that a business should entrust its entire crown jewels to a cloud storage service. But in this case, unless I've misunderstood, it seems like a whole bunch of companies entrusted their crown jewels to a third party who then stored said jewels on their behalf ... in something with a single point of failure.
That's a whole extra level of fuckwittery IMHO.
If the comment said the criminals were "pricks", would you assume that the author hated men?
Re: So england won
Now that "Britain's Got Celebrity X Factor" is off the air, I assume there must be an unused auto-tune machine lying around the studio. Problem solved.
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