Posts by Eponymous Bastard
58 posts • joined Monday 28th February 2011 19:35 GMT
Poison apple
Who would adam 'n' eve it?
IWGMC even though it's nearly summer.
Film anyone?
Or you could avoid using any software at all and shoot film and print your images in a darkroom like everyone used to do only about 10 years ago . . . . Or maybe you prefer to work in a room with 18% grey walls and subdued lighting and hope that your printer can satisfy your needs. Oh BTW, yes, I have done this in colour and black and white and it's really not that hard and it involves standing up and not sitting down which is apparently very bad for homo sapiens. Is digital so appealing then, given the "costs"?
I won't need a coat as, at the moment, it's not raining in Cornwall.
Books or trips anyone
"down to about 250-300 quid each . . . . "
That's quite a few books or nice little trips out to the park or the beach or the ghetto even. I hope nobody in teaching has the balls to turn around and say that education is underfunded in this god-forsaken cold grey country because they need . . . . it'll be censored or the thought police will smash down my front door if I type it. I will get my "outerwear".
Mac Pro case
Surely they're made by the same God that should have saved Steve Jobs from his untimely departure and eased his travelator ascendancy to Heaven? Or am I being glib? No, thought not.
French cars
Have owned two albeit, BL tinged, British cars, three French cars (but not Renault), and one Japanese car and have driven many of them around the clock. The French cars were agreeably reliable, the Japanese one almost faultless and the British cars . . . . ask Red Robbo as he should be very proud of what he did to the wonderful British car industry and can probably tell you why the cars made in his era were so wonderful too.
Re: @Obviously! ?
Why does a "child" need a smartphone?
Re: Never a good sign
Here's hoping!
Re: You missed...
I suspect you are only using your genitals to micturate. That "thing" can give pleasure too you know, and no, you won't go blind.
Browett
Hopefully Browett will destroy the Apple empire; he certainly didn't save the limping DSGI or whatever that bunch of arseholes call themselves these days so he's got a cracking track record Gromit!
Sheep
The same people, or a similar demographic, are those who consume the shite that is served up as entertainment and broadcast to the world's television receivers these days. It's the sort of shite that is comparable to the entertainment provided by the freak shows of mankind's illustrious past. It WILL all end in tears and Jobs will be vilified; oh yeah, he already is. IWGMC and it will be made of bile proof material so you fanbois need not bother firing your excrement at me because it will slide off . . . . . hehehehehe.
Paperback
Has anyone considered the dimensions of the "average" paperback? The Nexus 7 is almost exactly the height, slightly narrower and substantially less thick than most paperbacks - even Roland Barthes' seminal work Camera Lucida ISBN 0-09-922541-7. Perhaps its diminutive dimensions are part of its appeal. Looking at my own images on the 'net I can't see any problem with colour, contrast or sharpness compared to viewing the same images on a regular monitor; perhaps a little less saturated that's all. Chacun à son goût.
CF39
Why does Jake compare the Pentax to his 'Blad? The screen on the back of the CF is so small that it's almost useless other than to read the settings on it. Unless you tether the thing and shoot into Phocus or Flexcolor you can't see what you're doing or check your focus AF or manual. Yes you can stick your film back on and show your sprogs how effing marvellous Pan F looks but are talking about quite a few $£ to set up a darkroom even if you buy used and in the UK your water will probably cost you as much as your chems by the time you've washed. The words git and smug spring to mind.
Kodak's demise
I observe Kodak's demise with a huge amount of sadness. Paradoxically, I look forward to Apple's demise with a huge amount of glee hehehehe.
Why is Justin Bieber
and why does anyone care?
Re: How did the Lumia get in there.
Prius owners have a reputation for breaking wind in a most unpleasant fashion thereby rendering ineffectual their carbon reduction smugness. One day I'll get around to lighting one of their farts in a car park; it WILL make local radio news even if I only singe their clothing with the lance that I carry in my Hummer.
Re: Wait for all the Apple-haters
I worked not very hard for an Honours Degree in Classics (in the '80s), but you are a TWAT.
Customer service
I have yet to meet ANY Apple consumer who, when their prized possession fails, has enjoyed anything other than a poor response from their local re-seller or those dweebs in Cupertino. Add to that the insult that they have paid an amount of money for components for which Wintel manufacturers would charge roughly half and inevitably they feel pretty disappointed or worse.
Re: Sex play gone wrong?
I heard the guy, who did these tests, interviewed on the radio. It seems his job involves "exhaustive" tests attempting to replicate any given scenario involving suffocation victims some of whom are children; the guy deserves a medal.
Posted in Google Drive stalls on LAUNCH DAY
Tut
Get back into your walled garden you fanboi and don't even think about trying to climb out AGAIN! hehehehehe.
Posted in Mobee Magic Numpad
Numbers
Doesn't the fact that Apple has removed the number pad from its keyboards speak volumes about what it assumes about its target audience? Compare the fact that they ship iMacs with wireless keyboards which requires the end user to buy a cheap and nasty wired replacement, because in public places i.e. educational establishments, anything that is not connected or worthless will become the victim of a recidivist. Cheap keyboard and cheap mouse with over-priced iMac - quite funny really.
Are you a scientist?
So, NomNomNom you must be some kind of scientist, or perhaps you know how to use a search engine. Until the governments of the world agree to fund an INDEPENDENT study of the world's climate then may I suggest that the climate change advocates need to ask themselves a simple question. That is, should we spend billions, of whatever currency you prefer, on trying to prevent or capture carbon emissions, or should we let plants continue to do their job and spend the money on improving life for those with no reliable source of food, water or shelter?
Re: Instagram - Why??!
Philistine.
@Jeebus
"Generally find those obsessed with photography to be general life losers with nothing interesting of their own to talk about . . . "
Bit sweeping that one I think Jeebus.
Disease called Bill Gates
Well what does that say about Steve Jobs you whingeing fanbois? Hehehehehe.
Posted in British Red Cross First Aid
Red Cross
They just want your money and they care not how they get it; that's 21st century charity for you. It's commerce with charity as its cover.
Posted in Apple offers cash for old kit
Confused
Because people who buy into the Apple dream have to do the right thing don't they because they care so much about the planet and global warming - yeah right don't get me started. So of course those stoners in Cupertino thought it would be a great idea if having been butt-f****d once their customers would like to enjoy that feeling again. Isn't it obvious? You pay a hugely inflated price for a computer which will be obsolete in no time at all because the manufacturer decides that the hardware is not worth supporting any more, which for Apple seems to be about 5 years. I have a wintel laptop which is ten years old and gets used several times a week and works a treat. It would run the latest version of iTunes if I were prepared to install that piece of bloatware on it. Try that on a 10 year old iBook or whatever you call it - FAIL. Built in obsolescence has done wonders for landfill. BTW I have to work with Macs and wintel boxes and the Macs are a total fucking pain in the sphincter and students wonder why I scowl when they have problems with the iBook they've been given because they're dyslexic. I'll get my coat now.
What? You think dumping thousands of badly written 'textbooks' on kids would be a good thing?
Yes, they might learn to fucking read.
Posted in WHSmith Kobo Vox e-reader
Underscore
Hey mate you've got a fault with whatever piece of shit hardware you use inside the walled garden; the freakin'_underscore_key_is_stuck_____________________________________
Posted in Belkin LiveAction Camera Grip
Sweaty
Fanbois probably have such sweaty little digits they need something "firm" with which to grip their little slabs.
Posted in Motorola Xoom 2 10in Android tablet
iPad2?
At least you can copy files to the Xoom 2 on ANY PC or piece of shit Mac WITHOUT having to use the effing iCloud or that piece of shit bloatware SHiTunes!
Pyrrhic victory anyone?
Having worked for the bunch of c*#nts known as DSGi (well that was what they were known as a few years ago & there was little choice at the time) I can only hope that this is a Pyrrhic victory. For those of you who don't know what that is or cannot be bothered to Google it, I hope that they have expended so much effort into defending their pathetic retail offering that they are extirpated completely from every high street, website and out of town wasteland in this country and every other country that they have infiltrated. Trouble is the c*#nts at the top won't go hungry but some very loyal, knowledgeable - yes there are some - employees will struggle.
Posted in Best Buy to shutter all UK megastores
Fry's
Now if only Fry's would open in the UK. That would be an event and would give all you betrothed somewhere to go and while away the hours on a Saturday morning. Stumbled across the one on the outskirts of Las Vegas a few years back and spent many a happy hour there; and it had a café in the middle of it!
Posted in Best Buy to shutter all UK megastores
Not Just Dixons...
I think it's called a "distress purchase"; like having to buy petrol at a motorway service station . . . .
Posted in Best Buy to shutter all UK megastores
Store
My late father was a chain store manager in the '50s & 60s in Great Britain, so I don't feel that "store" is really that much of a neologism for us British.
Desparate (sic) measures?
You must be the spawn of Jobs.
Posted in iPhone 4S: Our *hit list
And you reckon the cloud is secure like a card that you can "own"?
I just don't get it; why you fanbois don't get it. I can get anything off and anything on to my Android 'phone without using iTunes and I can even remove the memory card from it and eat it and "pass" it if I want to. Has anyone tried eating and "passing" their iPhone? It would probably want to come out sideways. Maybe you could Blend it first . . . . . .
"Pass". Don't know why I've come over all polite suddenly. WGMC.
Tears
It will all end in tears; my tears as I piss myself laughing at all you suckers who bought into the Apple "dream".
And you you can add your own storage etc. etc. etc.
Trouble is, most of the lawyers probably think an iPad has wings and is used to keep a badly-packed kebab (© Viz) from spoiling garments, so how are they going to understand that anything other than something with a fucking Apple on it allows memory expansion and connection to a computer via USB at the very least?
Posted in Sonos Play:3 network music player
How about a REAL budget network audio player?
Tim. I've got a Synology box - the basic DS110J. I plugged an old (8 years I think) Creative USB sound card into the front USB port. Plugged the audio out into my hifi and voila I can play music from the DS using the so-so DS Audio Android app on my 'phone to control it. If only someone could make a better looking app - like Poweramp for example - it would be near perfect and cheap. I think there might be a list of supported soundcards on the Synology site; they do make their own USB device to do just this too. Hope this helps.
Posted in Head fed cyberspook resigns abruptly
Lee Rock?
Well there's a name to inspire confidence. If he'd been educated at an English public school he'd have been either bullied to tears or broken the limbs of many of the school's "free-place" but ESN nutters. Good luck to him!
Split infinitive!
I wholeheartedly agree
You wholeheartedly agree
He / She wholeheartedly agrees . . .
etcetera.
Mini milf
Come on guys; yes I am guessing that most of the Reg readers are of the bollock encumbered sex. The German Mini is almost always driven by milf. Well they sometimes look like milf but invariably when they pop their calves out of the door in graceful fashion you realise that they are in fact a 1664. BTW for the uninitiated it's a VIZ thing.
Posted in Ten... Premium Android smartphones
Extra batteries?
Who could be arsed to frig around changing batteries? There are so many opportunities to charge 'phones' batteries without access to the mains these days that I don't really see it as a problem. BTW those Jobs suckers have no freakin' choice hahahahaha!
