Feeds

* Posts by JeevesMkII

163 posts • joined 11 Feb 2011

Page:

Don't bother with Apple's 9 Sept hype-day: Someone's GONE AND BLABBED IT ALL

JeevesMkII

Le Sigh

I really hope they haven't convinced the major card issuers to back their proprietary proximity payment system. The last thing we need is that sort of fragmentation.

The right answer is to tell them to get with the program and implement the open standard everyone else uses.

7
1

Call girl injected Google exec with heroin, drank wine, left him to die – cops claim

This post has been deleted by a moderator

Brit bank Barclays rolls out voice recog for telephone banking

JeevesMkII

Thsi just seems bizarre to me

I mean, barclays hand out time-based password machines to all their customers. Why not just ask telephone banking customers for that, rather than buying an expensive new system that'll probably be about as secure as a glass bank vault.

3
0

iOS 8 screencaps leak: Text editor, dictaphone and 'tips' on the way

JeevesMkII

Re: If there's anything that iOS needs...

Sigh. As if 100% sandboxed or a complete free for all are the only two states of being possible.

You only have to look back as far as Symbian to see how to do it properly. Private data was private to the app, public data was public, and there was even an intermediate state where data could be shared between particular applications but not with the world at large.

Call it what it is: laziness. They can't be bothered with proper security, so they have this half-arsed system that inconveniences everyone.

2
1

Candy Crush King plans IPO valuing it at $7.6 BEEELLION

JeevesMkII

Re: Wow

"I think your bang on there, some stupid mugs are going to be left holding worthless bits of paper in 12 months."

Probably the same mugs who are already holding a bunch of worthless Zynga stock. Some people will never learn.

Having had a smash hit in the volatile mobile games market does not qualify you as a sound investment. Past experience indicates success isn't repeatable. Even if King somehow have found the magic formula to creating a stable business out of mobile games, wouldn't you want to see them demonstrate that before the IPO?

7
0

Your 'funny' cat pics are weighing down the web, so here's a better JPEG encoder from Mozilla

JeevesMkII

Re: What about a GIF squasher too?

GIF is a lossless standard like PNG. There's no wiggle room for better compression without discarding data or changing the format, a GIF is a GIF. At this point, it's pretty unlikely that a new animated image format will catch on. Anything you can't do with a GIF, people are probably going to do with a canvas.

People are already doing clever stuff with compressing the motion bit of animated gifs by defining the smallest part of the image that needs to be updated with each frame. Most video clip to GIF software does this.

3
1

China in the grip of a 'NUCLEAR WINTER': Smog threat to crops

JeevesMkII

Re: Economics Chinese Style

Come now. Even at the height of the cold war, when we were quite prepared to obliterate Beijing with atomic fire, we wouldn't stoop so low as to inflict Chairman Thatcher on the poor bastards. I'm pretty sure that's considered a crime against humanity.

13
12

Groupon plans MORE losses next quarter: Will lob wads of cash down marketing's maw

JeevesMkII

Re: groupon is still a thing?

The suckers who invested in a loss-making company at IPO?

4
0

Cops cuff 5 suspects after Silk Road copycat secret drug souk bust

JeevesMkII

At this point...

You've got to strongly suspect every single tor node is compromised. It doesn't seem like the cops have very much trouble busting all these black marketeers.

1
0

China's Jade Rabbit moon rover might have DIED in the NIGHT after 'abnormality'

JeevesMkII

Re: Yutu be or not to be....

Marvin the Martian, surely.

3
0

Is Google building SKYNET? Ad kingpin buys AI firm DeepMind

JeevesMkII
Terminator

Its one weakness: Poor reception on radio 4 long wave.

2
0

Not even 1.4m users can save 4Chan founder Chris Poole's startup

JeevesMkII

I think I see the problem...

"venture-backed opportunity." Jesus wept.

What ever happened to making something people want and charging money for it?

13
0

India's grip on offshoring eases ever so slightly

JeevesMkII

In other news, managers still stupid enough to believe what they lose in productivity they can make up for in volume.

2
0

PGP wiz Phil Zimmermann and pals tout anti-snoop mobe – the Blackphone

JeevesMkII

I wouldn't hold your breath...

Geeksphone can't even ship their own damn phones. My guess is this'll launch some time around the 20th of never.

2
0

Hopefuls rattle tin for customisable snap together 3D printer

JeevesMkII

Re: Wake Me Up

I'm sure the killer application for DIY 3D printing is minature wargames piracy.

If there aren't laser scans of Games Workshop minatures on the pirate bay at this very moment, there really ought to be.

3
0

You gotta fight for your copyright ... Beastie Boys sue toymaker over TV ad

JeevesMkII

Re: "original intent"

@A.O No, but unless you seriously want a court case to turn on whether a jury of Americans thinks a joke is funny, I'd stop asking awkward questions.

0
0
JeevesMkII

Re: Pretty much my thoughts too

Since almost all parody produced today is ultimately for commercial gain that seems like a pretty silly argument. I never heard anyone complaining when Spitting Image were producing their parody albums doing exactly what the Beastie Boys are complaining about here.

In fact, I think this is far more defensible than actually selling the song itself. It's unarguably transformative, has absolutely zero impact on the commercial value of the original, uses only a small subset of the original work, and considering the opposite intent of the new lyrics it probably qualifies as parody (in this case of the song, rather than the artist.)

6
3

Chinese iPhone thief returns SIM, contact list to rightful owner

JeevesMkII

He doesn't sound like a very smart criminal

After all, what would he have done if the thief decided to send a letter to the police with the man's address and information about "what business he is in"?

2
0

Guess which major US telco ISN'T cracking down on premium SMS spam?

JeevesMkII

Re: Its been the cancer of the UK mobile business for years

Not really the same thing.

In the UK, it's all about conning people in to sending texts to premium numbers. Same with those silent calls to try to con you in to dialling the premium rate number in the caller ID.

In the US they have this really bizarre practice of charging you for text messages you actually receive. The user doesn't have to do anything other than fail to text STOP back.

2
1

Twitter fires up stronger, anti-snooping encryption for its millions of twits

JeevesMkII

Doing what exactly?

TLS implemented well is more than enough to keep even professional criminals from eavesdropping on your traffic. I'd far sooner trust Twitter to use OpenSSL or GnuTLS according to the instructions than I would them implementing their own cryptosystem. Frankly, they're almost bound to have got it wrong somewhere.

It does nothing to keep the real problem at bay, that being government agents bearing rubber-stampted court orders, and adds a real element of risk that they've fucked it up and made themselves vulnerable to actual, feasible attacks rather than the largely theoretical bullshit attacks against TLS 1.1.

Why not just deploy TLS 1.2 everywhere and wait for browsers to catch up in support?

3
2

Cryptolocker infects cop PC: Massachusetts plod fork out Bitcoin ransom

JeevesMkII

A novel approach to crimefighting...

I'm sure they can solve other crimes by handing the criminals wads of money too. Think of the reduction in burglary if they just paid everyone thinking of doing a B&E job.

20
0

'PATHETIC' Galaxy Gear sales skewer smartwatch HYPE-O-GASM bubble

JeevesMkII

I have to wonder...

If the Apple Smartwatch was a cunning ploy to waste all their competitors time. It'd be genius. Put about a rumour that you're about to release a revolutionary new piece of consumer electronic tat that'll open up a whole new market sector, then point and laugh as all your rivals put out their own competitor to your phantom product that predictably flops on the market.

OK, not very likely, but it makes a hell of a lot more sense than actually developing a watch.

3
1

When three Linux journos go crowdfunding

JeevesMkII

50 percent of profits?

Considering it's a dead tree publication, I can only assume that'll be 50% of nothing.

Having seen what's been happening with other niche publications like New Scientist, I think their days are numbered even before launch.

1
10

'A measly 3 Instagrams? NO!' Sexy selfie Snapchat spurns Facebook's $3bn

JeevesMkII

There ought to be a name for this kind of hubris...

Zero profit startups rejecting massive buyouts because they think they shit gold bricks.... It needs a name... I'm sure there's a Digg pun to be had but it's not coming to me this late at night.

3
0

GoDaddy kicks off gTLD land rush with first domain sales

JeevesMkII

Gettcha fake Fendi and Rolex....

.luxury sounds like the most tacky possible bit of internet real estate. I can only assume it's a honeytrap for spammers. I think I might put in a rule now that moves all emails with a .luxury domain in the header or body to spam.

0
0

EYE-GASMIC: Apple MacBook Pro 15-inch with Retina Display

JeevesMkII

Re: Does it seem to anyone else...

Sure that's true, and that tends to be what I buy. I have a Dell Precision M6500 now. It's getting on towards 3 years old, and my experience is that 4 years is about the point at which I tend to start wanting a new one.

The problem is a) It costs 2000 quid, which I suppose is reasonable if you're conditioned by Apple prices but is a lot of money compared to other laptops, and b) The FirePro and Quadro cards get very little in the way of driver love. I have to run my laptop with the Radeon HD drivers as a generic 5800 series card, because the optimized FirePro drivers were ancient, buggy and never updated.

If I had my choice, I'd like the nice bulky, well ventilated but non-light-up build of the Precision combined with one of the high end gaming chips from, say, the Alienware line.

2
0
JeevesMkII

Does it seem to anyone else...

That it's now almost impossible to buy a laptop with discrete graphics that isn't a gaming laptop? I know the intel graphics chips have been getting better over the past few years, but their 3D performance is still pretty terrible.

I don't want a laptop that lights up seven ways from Sunday, I just want a nice mundane looking laptop that can play a game of Civ 5 on occasion.

4
0

Japanese boffins unveil INVINCIBLE robot rock, paper, scissors 'bot

JeevesMkII

I wonder if you can fake it out

What happens if you initially twitch out the first two knuckles of your hand as if you were going to throw scissors but then extend the whole hand to throw paper?

If the damn bot is going to cheat, I think two should be able to play at that game.

7
0

Indestructible, badass rootkit BadBIOS: Is this tech world's Loch Ness Monster? VOTE NOW

JeevesMkII

The ultrasonics bit sounds like utter cobblers to me.

Firstly, isn't the case speaker driven off a fixed crystal? Even if it were capable of generating ultrasonic tones, and I highly doubt any of the little piezo tweeters they mount on motherboards could vibrate that fast, who actually has a microphone capable of picking that up.

At least that part of the claim sounds like BS. I'd be astonished if you could reprogram USB sticks at a fundamental level either without physical access.

9
1

Blighty's laziness over IPv6 will cost us on the INTERNETS - study

JeevesMkII

Re: I'm ready now.

You're in the minority then. Most consumer routers don't have any useful degree of support for IPv6. I'm not even sure they know how they're going to present it to customers. I'm convinced that v6 adoption in homes is going to require a hell of a lot of work to present to non-technical customers in a humane fashion. At very least, we'll be needing a name server in every device so we don't have to deal with the actual numbers..

3
0

Ahoy, scalliwags! FBI claims another haul of Silk Road booty - $26m of it

JeevesMkII

How do you confiscate bitcoins anyway?

It seems weird this guy let his bitcoins be confiscated. How hard would it be to keep the keys strongly encrypted and just claim you forgot the password? Sure, you're going to get a contempt of court rap added to your sentence, but when you get out you're going to have several million completely untraceable dollars. Seems like a reasonable trade to me.

0
0

Profitless scrapbooking site Pinterest adds over $1bn to its book value

JeevesMkII

Re: And the royal mail

See, the Royal Mail's mistake was charging money for their services. As soon as you try to make a profit, it becomes very clear to people just how much your business is worth.

In the New New New Economy, profit is something you chase after your IPO. You see, investors nowadays are very much in the mindset that information about the value of your business is totally optional. They'll take it if it's handy, but if it's not then it won't stop them.

And if you can't quite stagger to IPO under your own steam, Yahoo still has money left to bail you out. They're always looking for more repositories of cat pictures to slap ads on.

1
0

US parents proclaim 811 'Messiahs'

JeevesMkII

Re: Alas, all is vanity...

I guess the confusion is because Peter was the disciple formerly known as Simon.

Isn't god the ultimate narcissistic parent? Wants all his kids to worship him, and his avatar even went around giving them funny names.

1
0

Who here needs to explain things to ELEPHANTS?

JeevesMkII

Re: Something to point with?

Dogs don't understand pointing. Point at something and a dog looks at your finger, not the object.

11
2

USB 3.1 demo shows new spec well on its way towards 1.2GB/sec goal

JeevesMkII
Terminator

The tridents mean that USB is in league with Satan...

But all the terminators show SCSI was in league with Skynet. QED.

4
0

Ex-CEO Elop's plunder to total $25m in voyage from Nokia to Microsoft

JeevesMkII

I thought 30 pieces of silver was the more traditional reward...

6
0

iPhone 5S: Apple, you're BORING us to DEATH (And you too, Samsung)

JeevesMkII

Re: What is left to do?

Well, you've just perfectly illustrated why you can't innovate via focus groups.

Ask people what they want from a phone and they'll rattle off a list of features that are present in any number of pre-existing devices. You have to show them something new before they know whether they want it or not, and even then you'll probably get resistance from a lot of people who are set in their ways.

Innovation is by definition unpredictable.

2
1
JeevesMkII

Backed themselves in to a corner

The thing is, how are going to innovate? All the Android adopters have backed themselves firmly in to a corner. They've fired all their competent software engineers because all the hard work is done by Google and their silicon vendors, and they're stuck with what Google tells them a phone should look like because Android isn't anywhere near flexible enough support anything but the one form factor. You can do as Nokia have done and innovate in the peripheral devices, but you're basically stuck churning out phones that look and feel identical to one another.

Apple, controlling most of the hardware and the software themselves might be able to do something, but they won't because it isn't a business they're any good at. As strange as it sounds, we might have to look to small upstart players who are prepared to chuck Google Play, Google Apps and indeed most of Android out of the window in order to produce something other than the same ol, same ol'.

0
4
JeevesMkII

Actually, I'm pretty sure it was the Amazon MP3 store that gave the labels the requisite kick up the bum. Until that point, all digital music was either piracy-based or somebody's attempt to cash in on their proprietary media player sales.

Now, if only somebody gave the video industry a similar kick in the pants.

8
1

NORKS prepping glorious People's Smartmobe

JeevesMkII
Coat

Yes, but will it have an angry birds clone?

Or, as the NORKs call it, People's glorious avians of righteous porcine retribution.

6
0

Canonical: Last change to Ubuntu Edge phone price – we promise

JeevesMkII

Daylight Robbery

I got myself a Firefox phone for 150 euro that I could no doubt trade one hack up of Android for another on. You'd be lucky to get 700 bucks out of me even if you reinvented the Nokia Communicator in an awesome thin form factor with touch screens on both surfaces. Enjoy your alpha quality software at a premium price, suckers.

2
5

Here we go again: Apple gets second bite in ITC Moto patent spat

JeevesMkII

Anyone want to bet...

... on how many times the verdict flips back and forth on this case and its myriad appeals? Side bets available on how long it takes the US government to realise these disputes aren't useful commerce and gets around to passing some sort of patent reform bill?

0
0

Buy a household 3D printer, it'll pay for itself in MONTHS!

JeevesMkII

Re: A modern day laser

I'm sure if I had a megawatt laser, I'd view it as the solution to every problem too.

The only really interesting thing I've ever seen 3D printers being used for is to produce D&D miniatures and scenery cheaper than you'd pay in a gaming store.

5
0

Wii U sales plunge: Nintendo hopes Mario and Zelda will shift some kit

JeevesMkII

To be fair, Windwaker was the best Zelda game they've ever made. It's really not it's fault that the console didn't have enough other great titles to make it a must buy. Still I maintain it was worth it to own a gamecube to play the Crazy Taxi in near arcade glory.

0
0

Zynga ABANDONS ALL HOPE of opening US gambling operation

JeevesMkII

Re: The gold standard for free to play games is Team Fortress 2

TF2 is hardly a free to play model anyone can emulate. The reason it's free to play to begin with, after its initial period of being a pay to play tack on to the gold box, is that it was a loss leader to get people to download Steam.

Valve don't give a damn if TF2 makes or loses money, their money is from the commission they rake in from every other game on Steam.

0
0
JeevesMkII

ITYM...

One hit wonder desperately flails around for business model to justify IPO.

5
0

Spanish mobile startup offers Firefox OS phones to world+dog

JeevesMkII

Re: Will anyone get on board?

Well, neither Ubuntu or Mozilla can possibly displace Android as today's dominant OS since they're both parasites on Android. Killing Android kills their access to the hardware, and neither Canonical nor Mozilla are equipped to do that grunt work without considerable restructuring of their core business.

That said, there are market niches that Android doesn't really serve. Most of them much downmarket of Android, in markets where keeping both BoM and support costs low are the order of the day. I really can't see them having any success with their everyman generic UIs though.

I preordered one. Not because I think B2G is much cop, just because it'll be a fun toy to hack so my real phone doesn't have to suffer.

0
0

Hubble spots ALIEN NAVY world – and it's pelted with GLASS RAIN

JeevesMkII

Re: Hellish is a point of view

Whatever. It still sounds more inviting than Butlins.

7
0

Crowdsourced flaw-finding cheaper than in-house bug hunters

JeevesMkII
FAIL

What's the total cost of disownership?

Yeah, I'm sure not giving a damn about shipping secure software is cheaper than giving a damn.

Except if you actually account for the cost to your reputation when the blackhats find all those flaws you shipped before the whitehats do. I think crime pays a lot better than your measly browser bug bounties.

1
0

Xobni! heads! to! Yahoo! elephant! graveyard!

JeevesMkII
Unhappy

Re: What's Wrong?

It's pretty obvious. General failure to thrive. It's kind of sad really. Of all the high profile startups from the last few years, Xobni was the closest to having a real product and a real business model. They just got seduced by easy money. If they'd taken 100K and turned it an email plugin that made it really easy to organise your inbox, they'd be swimming in black ink right now and on to their third or fourth successful product. Instead, they took 40 million, and you have to sell a whole lot of email plugins to pay for what 40 mil buys you. Hence the wreckage of enterprise this and cloud that. And hence the being sold off for spare parts to a company always on the lookout for novel ways to put itself out of business.

1
0

Page: