* Posts by Trainee grumpy old ****

130 posts • joined 18 Nov 2010

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Belgium to the rescue as UK consumers freeze after BST blunder

Trainee grumpy old ****

>> What's the difficulty? Printed timetables could just include a note to the effect that, "services will run an hour before the printed time between April and October, whilst on-line and electronic timetables could adjust automatically.

So if I want to get the 14:22, to <wherever> which train do I catch?

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Assange™ lawyers demand Swedish prosecution files or no London interview

Trainee grumpy old ****

>The issue is that even if they come, Assange could refuse to answer and could refuse to meet with them. So while the investigators are there. Its pretty much a wasted trip.

If he refused to meet them, then hopefully the prosecution could use that to make a case for waiving the statute of limitations? The fact that he makes a new demand everytime he gets a concession should be going into the building of a case....

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That's a big 4Ker of a cosmos: 3D planetarium to open in Bristol

Trainee grumpy old ****
Black Helicopters

RE: “Software Defined Programmable City”

>> see what happens to it when it makes contact with St Paul's. And Southmead. And Hartcliffe

Whoever came up with the name may subconciously wish to configure certain areas out of the city?

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SCARESTEROID of the week to miss Earth on Friday

Trainee grumpy old ****
Trollface

The Express?

If they haven't made any connection between this asteroid and Diana then it can't be an important story.

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Layla enjoys a Sanskrit makeover: Clapton set to become one of several Gods

Trainee grumpy old ****

Some of his other tracks on Sound Cloud are worth a listen too

I quite like his version of Don't Fear the Reaper - https://soundcloud.com/krishashok/mrityum-ma

No idea if the lyrics are true to the original.

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BBC websites GO TITSUP – Auntie blames 'internal system failure'

Trainee grumpy old ****
Trollface

Wonder if anyone will come up with

"This just goes to show why we need more Digital!"

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Boffins probe mystery of ANTARCTIC BLOOD GLACIER

Trainee grumpy old ****
Joke

Boffins

Boffins in the title but Scientists in the article? Is this pandering to new readers' complaints? Nothing but the finest boffins for us regular readers please!

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Reckon YOU can write better headlines than us? Great – apply within

Trainee grumpy old ****
WTF?

>> Millions follow our world-beating coverage of ray guns, atom smashers, killer robots, selected celebrities, zeppelins, space oddities, and garden-shed engineering breakthroughs, besides our daily reports on the professional IT world.

How could you forget the post-pub nosh?!

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Watch: China has made an internet censorship THEME SONG

Trainee grumpy old ****
Big Brother

Screen behind the chorus

Are those the lyrics that are being projected onto the screen at the back of the stage?

Is the audience expected to sing along or is it just to reinforce the message?

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Anthem, America's second biggest health insurer, HACKED: Millions hit by breach

Trainee grumpy old ****
Meh

Re: Love it...

>> What happens to the poor schmucks after 12 months...

Well, by then some other mega-corp will have been "hacked" and will be paying for 12 months of identity theft monitoring. Rinse and repeat.

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Hey kids! If you vote Facebook will give you EXTRA LIKES*

Trainee grumpy old ****
Boffin

> It's a pity single transferable vote didn't get through.

The reason STV didn't get through was both Labour and the Conservatives pitched it as something the Lib Dems wanted and therefore it must be opposed. The referendum happened at about the height of the "bash the Yellows" phase of this parliament. If the next parliament is even more hung than the current one, then I suspect both parties may soon regret not having STV.

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Lost SPACECRAFT believed FOUND ON COMET

Trainee grumpy old ****
Joke

>> Yeah, but how do you pronounce it?

Papua New Guinea?

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Thailand: 'The nail that sticks up gets hammered down'

Trainee grumpy old ****
Thumb Down

Re: It is

>> PS. Icon - the only thing that kill a vindaloo...

Only because you've never encountered a real vindaloo.

The vindaloo comes from the Portuguese colonies in India, primarily Goa, and is a fusion of Portuguese and Indian cuisines. It is more sour, due to the vinegar used, than hot, due to any chillies. Additionally a "proper" vindaloo is made with pork - something you are quite unlikely to find in most "Indian" restaurants in Britain.

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SPACE the FINAL FRONTIER: These are the images of COMET PROBE ROSETTA

Trainee grumpy old ****
Mushroom

Re: Ok, so I'm sold on location

You can build a snowman but, seeing as everything is "Egyptian", don't be too surprised if some killjoy issues a fatwa against it.

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#CASHTAGS are a thing: you can now bank on Twitter

Trainee grumpy old ****
Unhappy

Re: publicly visible?

"banking on Facebook" => For extra shivers - imaging it posting to your timeline.

"<your name> paid ¤nnn to <payee>"

"<your name> received ¤nnn from <payer>"

"<your name> is overdrawn"

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Erik Meijer: AGILE must be destroyed, once and for all

Trainee grumpy old ****

Agile as practised in certain large corporates:

http://www.halfarsedagilemanifesto.org

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It's nearly 2015 – and your Windows PC can still be owned by a Visual Basic script

Trainee grumpy old ****

Re: gra'ma

Authenticity fail - insufficient use of "like".

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Go festive this year with Christmas carols, baby Jesus and CLITORAL STIMULATORS

Trainee grumpy old ****

My present budget for this year will go to the company who avoids playing moronic xmas music over their tannoy.

A very good filter - probably excludes 99.999% of all tat (and even non-tat) purveyors.

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All aboard the Poo Bus! Ding ding, route Number Two departing

Trainee grumpy old ****
Boffin

Calculations seem a bit off.

If 80 people are carried every day then over 365 days that is 80*365 = 29,200 passengers per year.

Over this time the bus is fuelled by 500 people that means each person shitting propels 29,200/500 = 58.4 passengers.

Even if the bus only carries a quarter of its capacity (20*365 = 7,300) that's still 7,300 / 500 = 14.6 passengers per shitter.

A bit more efficient than 4 shitters per passenger!

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Blackpool hotel 'fines' couple £100 for crap TripAdvisor review

Trainee grumpy old ****
WTF?

Re: Tripadvisor.

>> Tripadvisor should flag up hotels with policies like this really clearly,

And how are Tripadvisor going to know that they have such a policy?

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NOKIA - Not FINNished yet! BEHOLD the somewhat DULL MYSTERY DEVICE!

Trainee grumpy old ****

I would love to see

an Android phone with a camera like the one on the 1020. I'll just keep hoping that it happens sometime.

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Mastercard and Visa to ERADICATE password authentication

Trainee grumpy old ****
Trollface

Re: So how secure are 'biometrics'?

>> particularly unusable since it prevents me from using a password manager by asking for random characters from my password.

Get a better password manager? One that lets you select specific characters / substrings from your password.

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'Scope boffins get INSIDE URANUS after snapping mystery spots

Trainee grumpy old ****
Trollface

You missed one!

Am I the only one who, on reading the title, expected the word "Goatse" to appear in the article?

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Virgin Media CUTS OFF weekend 'net surfers after embarrassing smut-filtering snafu

Trainee grumpy old ****
Childcatcher

Re: So, (from down here in the antipodes)

It means the major ISPs have agreed(*) to provide an option to filter "unsuitable" content (because - see icon). Some weeks I ago I had checked my own account settings I was very surprised to see that the default setting there was opt-out.

As one would expect the definition of "unsuitable" is suitably vague (at least whatever definitions I've seen have left me with more questions than answers).

I must admit that Virgin is my ISP. In my defence may I point out that my router's DNS settings point elsewhere and I appear to have been completely missed by this outage, reading about it on El Reg is the first I've known about it.

(*) for "agreed" read - "bullied by the, pure as driven snow, tabloid press".

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#VultureTRENDING: It's Pimpr, the latest sharing economy super app

Trainee grumpy old ****
Thumb Up

Warming up for April?

Roll on 01/04 (or 04/01 for the left-pondians)

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Ex-NSA lawyer warns Google, Apple: IMPENETRABLE RIM ruined BlackBerry

Trainee grumpy old ****

Re: Toe the line...

One I've seen a bit too often recently - "full proof" (as in "I want this UI to be full proof").

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COMET 67P is basically TRAILING a HORRIFIC STENCH through space

Trainee grumpy old ****
Joke

Lapse in El-Reg editing standards?

But scientists are intrigued by the mix of stuff coming off the comet.

Wot no boffins?

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Apple 'Genius': iPhone 6? We've had NO COMPLAINTS about our BENDY iThing

Trainee grumpy old ****

Re: So what's the actual problem?

I'll put my hand up to carrying my Galaxy Note(*) in the back pocket of my jeans(**) and occasionally sitting on it. No ill effect.

*: the original one, still going strong on Cyanogen Mod

**: Not particular skinny.

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Man's future in space ... Barack Obama: Mars. Narendra Modi: Mars. Vladimir Putin: Er, Moon

Trainee grumpy old ****
Boffin

Re: How do you say, "awesome fucking moonbase" in Russian?

"удивительным чертовски луна-база", по-видимому. (Google является вашим другом)

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MOM: CHEAP Mars ship got it right first time. Nice one, India

Trainee grumpy old ****
Flame

Priorities

Priorities 1: India spends roughly 45 million (in Sterling) sending a satellite to Mars and hopefully inspiring a future generation of scientists. In the mean time we will be spending upwards of 30-40 BILLION to get from London to Brum a few minutes quicker. How many kids will HS2 inspire?

Priorities 2: It costs more to get some footballers to pledge temporary allegiance to a team!

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Oz carrier Tiger Air takes terror alerts to new heights

Trainee grumpy old ****
Unhappy

Re: Targeted

>> But be proud that throughout it all the British response was to ignore the cowards for what they are/were > spineless gits.

And now, possibly to return the balance to the mean, we have gone in the absolutely opposite direction. Peaceful, normal day to day activities get the "OMFG T3rr0ist!!!!!!!" treatment.

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iPhone 6: Most exquisite MOBILE? No. It is the Most Exquisite THING. EVER

Trainee grumpy old ****

Re: SanFrancisco

>> and the ROMs didn't affect the warrany?

Response 1: Warranty? After 4 years? Good luck trying to get any phone manufacturer to fix anything under warranty after so long - even if the phone had been kept in pristine condition.

Response 2: The San Francisco was both relatively cheap and about as close to un-brickable as is possible that there were plenty who were able to take the risk of flashing it over and over again.

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Reg bloke zips through an iPHONE 6 queue from ZERO to 60 SECONDS

Trainee grumpy old ****
Trollface

Re: very insightful observation, Ali.

>> He must be married.

If he was married (or in a relationship) he would have known the correct answer: They got their husbands / partners to queue and get it for them.

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The Apple Watch and CROTCH RUBBING. How are they related?

Trainee grumpy old ****
Meh

At least on the bright side

Apple giving away an album is probably the first world problem to end all first world problems. You wouldn't know it for all wailing and gnashing though.

(Neither a U2 fan nor a fanboi)

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Google swallows SMARTSPOON manufacturer Lift Labs

Trainee grumpy old ****

Spoons?

Can we expect to see Google in Private Eye's "Me & My Spoons" column soon?

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Oi, you don't work here, MR ANYTHING BUT incisive – get your grubby mitts off our commentards

Trainee grumpy old ****
Pint

"Friday afternoon desk beer"

Work-life balance etc: don't take your work to the pub!

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NATO nations 'will respond to a Cyber attack on one as though it were on all'

Trainee grumpy old ****
Mushroom

Cardiff?

>> a NATO summit in and around Cardiff, Wales later this week

It is in Newport. Many South Walians get a little touchy about their neck of the woods being identified as the 'diff.

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CNN 'tech analyst' on NAKED CELEBS: WHO IS this mystery '4chan' PERSON?

Trainee grumpy old ****

Re: Passpattern

Works so long as you don't need to use a foreign keyboard, say, when on holiday.

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Experimental hypersonic SUPERMISSILE destroyed 4 SECONDS after US launched it

Trainee grumpy old ****
Mushroom

Re: Why?

Roger Waters says it best:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rekuWIKr55A

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Not really very live at all from London - It's the Vulture News videocast

Trainee grumpy old ****
Trollface

Re: boss wasn't watching, with a potato

Does the presence of a potato make a difference to the boss watching or not watching?

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We sent a probe SIX BILLION km to measure temperature of a COMET doing 135,000 km/h

Trainee grumpy old ****
Boffin

Re: Speed trap.

>> The fine for speeding like that would be huge!!

At ~40 kilometers per second, I suspect that most of the technology employed by your average "safety camera partnership" would struggle to detect the speeding. (Don't try this at home kids)

Edit: Corrected units

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THUD! WD plonks down SIX TERABYTE 'consumer NAS' fatboy

Trainee grumpy old ****
Joke

Re: How much?

>> £199 for WD 4T ?????

It must be a VERY big can.

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China's 'Deep Panda' crew targets Middle East policy wonks - report

Trainee grumpy old ****
Trollface

Pretty smart - get someone else to pay for your protetcion

"Thus, it wouldn’t be surprising if the Chinese government is highly interested in getting a better sense of the possibility of deeper U.S. military involvement that could help protect the Chinese oil infrastructure in Iraq,”

"The West" (mainly US/UK/OZ) in its role as the World's Policeman(TM) spends lives and money "bringing democracy" to various countries and dealing with eruptions of local difficulties. The Chinese come along behind and do business. Smart that.

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Google BLOCKS access to Goldman client-leak email

Trainee grumpy old ****
Alert

I wonder

Will we see an upsurge in phishing emails apparently from gs.com addresses?

Mail body contains some financial jargon and signature with references to SOX etc.. No exhortations to open the attachment. I'll bet there will be a few marks who wont be able open the attachment fast enough.

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BBC: Bumpkins, hobbits need fairer coverage

Trainee grumpy old ****
Unhappy

Re: I live in a town in the Cotswolds...

>> Anyway, I just want more tech shows BBC, go on, more technology please!

Unfortunately the BBC's "technology" output falls way short of the expectations of many El Reg readers.

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LEAKED: Redmond not allowed to sell 'Nokia' smartphones after 2015

Trainee grumpy old ****
FAIL

No wonder Elop didn't get a look in for MS CEO

Despite having their own man in charge they still couldn't get a favourable deal to buy Nokia.

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Whoops! Google's D-Day Doodle honors ... Japan

Trainee grumpy old ****
Joke

Some one has to say it

Google were following the instructions from that well known documentary.

"Don't mention the war!"

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REVEALED: GCHQ's BEYOND TOP SECRET Middle Eastern INTERNET SPY BASE

Trainee grumpy old ****
Black Helicopters

Re: Britain's got secrets

>>"At what level are things really kept secret"

>That would be Strap 4, which covers codewords like CASE NIGHTMARE GREEN.

Beyond that you have to have signed paragraph 4 of the OSA.

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Labour calls for BIG OVERHAUL of UK super-snoop powers in 'new digital world'

Trainee grumpy old ****

Re: Okay so this will work like the last election.

All the main-stream political parties are as bad as each other. Vote Monster Raving Loony - you know it makes sense.

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UK.gov back-office battle may see British Justice offshored

Trainee grumpy old ****

Re: For sale - Great Britain PLC

Bids and offers of Directorships to the Tory Party HQ the HQ of whichever party is in power at the time.

FTFY

It has been so for some time now.

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