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* Posts by Tom Maddox

765 posts • joined 4 Jun 2007

New compute-'n'-storage cluster-box like 'iPhone for the data centre'

Tom Maddox
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Sounds pretty cool . . .

. . . but how does it integrate with existing VMware clusters? If I chuck it into an environment with an existing infrastructure, how will they interoperate? I'm guessing that one has to use storage vMotion to move VMs from one environment to the other, effectively creating a silo of Nutanix resources.

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Steve Jobs was top of the flops, says Apple's Tim Cook

Tom Maddox
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Trollface

Re: Why do people care so much about the Foxconn rebranding thing?

"Yet for some reason people are only getting up in arms over Apple."

Not people, fanbois.

"Let it GO people."

A worthwhile plea, but one I'm guessing will fall on deaf ears.

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Facebook needs Opera - to rescue it from dependence on Apple

Tom Maddox
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Holmes

Re: Opera - top dog. AC@17:17

It's backlash against mindless Opera fanboyism.

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Dragon starts final approach to International Space Station

Tom Maddox
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Joke

Fake

The photo is obviously fake. First of all, where are all the stars? Second, look at that terrible resolution--this was obviously cobbled together quickly in Photoshop. The Earth looks like it comes from a '90s-era videogame!

Shame on you, El Reg, for publishing such misleading trash and continuing the decades-long government conspiracy-driven myth that humans have been to space!

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NetApp streaks ahead, avoids trip-up by bum flash leg

Tom Maddox
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FAIL

Re: Chris Mellor has forgotten

That's nice. Wake me when they have a shipping product. It's way too late for NetApp to be "looking at lots of technology;" they need real product on the roadmap, or they're going to get their lunch eaten by EMC on the one hand and an assortment of leading-edge smaller vendors on the other.

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Tom Maddox
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Holmes

Re: Why do you keep bringing up flash drives outside of the array?

EMC's Project Lightning flash and HP's rebranded TMS flash drives are about onboard server read-only flash cache, not flash drives per se. The value in it is that it allows read traffic to be cached, potentially taking signicant i/o load off the array. The reason to put flash cache on the server as opposed to or in addition to the array is that it allows much more effective acceleration of that particular server's workload, which is good for your critical systems. NetApp's FlashCache is an on-array technology (not off-array as incorrectly stated above), which is good for some workloads.

Both NetApp and EMC are behind the curve with flash technology, and they can afford to be, for the moment. Eventually, both NetApp and EMC need more compelling flash offerings; EMC seems to be on the ball, finally, with its XtremeIO acquisition, which leaves NetApp looking a little clueless on that front.

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Fantasy cabal sells off novel-as-app platform

Tom Maddox
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Coat

The Cabal?

There is no Cabal.

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EMC denies big server biz plans ... but IS building servers

Tom Maddox
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Holmes

Inevitable, really

Convergence of the datacenter stack is basically inevitable. Hardware is becoming commoditized, so that Cisco and EMC are basically building computers dedicated to a single purpose out of the same hardware and, in some cases, the same basic operating system. Since both companies already have expertise in building computers, why not expand that expertise into general-purpose computing and integrate the general-purpose product lines with the special-purpose ones, driving overall sales?

In theory, the customer could even benefit from this sort of arrangement, especially given the pain involved in configuring SAN connectivity--how much better would it be to have kit pre-configured and validated to work with your storage vendor's equipment? The next logical step is for Cisco to start making storage gear and EMC to start making storage switches.

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Google in the clear on Oracle patents

Tom Maddox
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Facepalm

Re: Probaby not too important from Oracle's point of view

Did you . . . you didn't . . . oh yes you did. You invoked Florian Mueller on The Register's comment board. I'm going to step well away from you and watch the hatefest.

In any case, this battle is far from over. Both companies are sure to fight this case to the bitter end (emphasis on the bitter), so look out for countless appeals and endless legal maneuvering.

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How to simulate a light armoured vehicle

Tom Maddox
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Stop

Re: some actual photos of the simulators themselves would help!!!!

The reason for the "lack of meat" may be in this sentence:

"But not too revealing – in order to write this story we had to agree to vetting by the Australian Department of Defence."

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Stuck in a dull conference? You need Verity's survival guide

Tom Maddox
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Re: Can I suggest..

With the phrase "journey to the cloud" meriting a full -1.0.

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Japanese operator to test quake-proof floating phone-mast BLIMPS

Tom Maddox
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Headmaster

Re: YEAH RIGHT

AndrueC, meet BIG DUMB GUY 555. He thinks his shtick is funny. So far, he's wrong.

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Microsoft scrapes Windows Azure name off cloudy kit

Tom Maddox
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Stop

Re: emPHAsis on the Wrong syLLAble

"Read more on my blog"

How about . . . no.

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Boffins baking big-data single chip architecture

Tom Maddox
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Mushroom

Re: – half an atomic layer of titanium – (?)

Simple, you just split the atoms.

What?

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The Pirate Bay cries foul over Pirate Bay copycats

Tom Maddox
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Mushroom

Re: Ha, ha, ha, ha...

You, on the other hand, are my *least* favorite troll on the site.

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Finally, it’s the year of Linux on the desktop IPv6!

Tom Maddox
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Go

DSL modems

I have installed custom firmware on my home router, so it now supports IPv6, but my DSL modem does not, so I would presumably have to tunnel IPv6 through an IPv4 connection, and I'm not sure there's even any point to that. I suppose I'll have to give it another go-round.

On the plus side, my printer's NIC died, so I no longer have to worry about IPv4 for that, clearing me to go IPv6 throughout the LAN.

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iTunes fanbois outraged by Apple's sex-life quiz probe

Tom Maddox
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Headmaster

Re: Oh look! Another excuse to bash apple!

I believe the tone of the review may have had something to do with it. You'll have noted that El Reg often uses rhetorical devices like sarcasm and irony, the intent of which is frequently lost on Jobsian cultists, resulting in Aggravated Butthurt in the First Degree, from which Apple has clearly not recovered.

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Tom Maddox
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Headmaster

Re: "I literally cannot choose from the 2nd set of questions, none of them apply"

And:

I'm excessively literal-minded, so I am unable to make up a memorable answer to any of these questions without having a nervous breakdown.

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Nokia, private equity chat about €200m bling phone firm sale

Tom Maddox
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Go

Good, good

You are my very favorite troll on the whole site, not least because there are so many people who seem to miss what you're doing and thus get their Finnish panties in a wad. Normally I'm not in favor of trolling, but yours is just subtle enough that most people seem to miss it.

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Griffin Helo TC Assault

Tom Maddox
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Black Helicopters

"Message for you, sir"

Sounds better than sending intra-office email, that's for sure.

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Google KNEW Street View cars were slurping Wi-Fi

Tom Maddox
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Coat

Engineer Doe?

More like "Engineer Duh," amirite?

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'Geek' image scares women away from tech industry

Tom Maddox
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Boffin

I await the many comments on this article which further demonstrate why there are so few women in IT.

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Report: Microsoft tried and FAILED to offload Bing on Facebook

Tom Maddox
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Trollface

Re: If they really want better search results...

I just used both Bing and Google to look up two search phrases:

Bing gives crap results

Google gives crap results

The results are quite different, actually. Which one provides more *relevant* results depends on what you're looking for, I guess. Interestingly, this very article is sixth in Google rankings but does not appear at all on the first page of Bing results. What that means, I have no idea.

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Mobile phones still safe... probably

Tom Maddox
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Facepalm

My god, you're right! No one ever talks about that stuff! Someone should be alerted, and Something Should Be Done! Maybe someone could form an organic food movement and press for the categorization and labeling of foods accordingly.

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3.2 billion pixel sky-watcher a step closer

Tom Maddox
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Joke

Pfft

Everyone has been telling me how you need to focus on more than just the pixel count. Why don't they just have one of the ISS astronauts take a few pictures with an iPhone?

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Apple screws UK disties, punts just 13,000 iPads to channel

Tom Maddox
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Headmaster

Re: El Reg is still smarting about Apple's refusal to have any official contact with them

Oh dear, I see you've misspelled "Apple is still smarting from El Reg's initial mockery, giving El Reg no reason not to continue sticking the boot in."

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Moody's downgrades Nokia to near-junk status

Tom Maddox
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Re: Nokia will come good

Good, good, now reeeeeel them in . . .

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So what's the worst movie NEVER made?

Tom Maddox
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Holmes

Re: skewed

"These polls are highly skewed by what kind of viewer responds."

The hell you say.

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Chinese coders beat all-comers

Tom Maddox
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Holmes

Re: Dueling Headlines

China != Asia.

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Softphones strangled by smartphone battery life

Tom Maddox
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Angel

Like this?

Yo dawg, I heard you like phones, so I put a phone on your phone, so you can phone while you phone.

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Judge: Checking Facebook at work is not a crime

Tom Maddox
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Mushroom

Re: "We take no responsibility..."

Lighten up, Francis.

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Tom Maddox
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Stop

Re: Sense as prevailed across the pond...

I would point out that you are referring to the Republic of Texas, not the USA. We take no responsibility for those yahoos.

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DoJ could start Apple ebook price-fixing lawsuit this week

Tom Maddox
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Go

Re: Wholesale vs Price Fixing

One correction:

Apple say, "Sell via us, and you can set any price you like, as long as we get 30% and you sell no cheaper through any other outlet."

Publishers respond, "So, we can set our price at whatever we like, and we can use our deal with Apple as an excuse not to lower it for anyone? Done!"

Amazon: "Hey, what happened to our volume discount?"

Publishers: "You know, it's a real bummer, but we signed this deal with Apple, so we can't offer you lower prices anymore."

Amazon: "That's really going to cut into our sales of both ebooks and ebook readers."

Publishers: "Suck it, Amazon. Suck it long and suck it hard."

Ironically, if the publishers had just negotiated harder with Amazon in the first place, they wouldn't be in this situation.

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Nokia shares fall as it drops first quarter forecast

Tom Maddox
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Re: The start of a beautiful friendship

Two people (so far) have missed the subtle irony in your post.

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Whisky IN SPAAAAACE: Zero-G Scotch is matured aboard the ISS

Tom Maddox
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Windows

Re: mmmm.. whisky

Hell, it's 6:00 AM somewhere.

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RIM: BlackBerry sales to US gov still on the rise

Tom Maddox
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Trollface

Welcome to The Register. Here's your hanky.

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Facebook accused of 'wanton' use of Canadian woman's pics

Tom Maddox
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Re: Facebook?

"I have literally no idea why anybody would want to use Facebook, ever.

That really should be an end to the matter. Off you go now."

Ah, it's the ever-popular geek fallacy of generalizing from one's own needs and desires. You prefer not to use Facebook, so everyone who uses it is an idiot. I'm sure that argument is very persuasive in real life.

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IPv6 networking: Bad news for small biz

Tom Maddox
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Facepalm

Re: It's funny that....

You want to know how I know you didn't read the article?

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Use the holy word of God to stay secure online, says bishop

Tom Maddox
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Angel

"Touched by his noodly appendage" would also be pretty secure. RAmen.

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Tom Maddox
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Angel

Re: YHWH

"Please remain where you are. An angry mob will be around shortly to stone you to death."

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Man FLIES with Android-powered homemade bird wings

Tom Maddox
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Go

Re: Not an iThing-

iCarus?

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Rogue IPO bureaucrats feel MPs' red-hot probe

Tom Maddox
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Facepalm

Re: Mr

Quite right. Why, I remember my time in the gulags of Mountain View like it was yesterday: being force-fed energy drinks until my bladder ached and my eyes watered, geeks with neck-beards shrieking at me to "Kiss the penguin," and Sergei Brin himself screaming "BOOM! HEADSHOT!" at me endlessly and dipping his hideous, misshapen scrotum onto my forehead.

No, wait, none of that ever happened.

Get a grip, or at least a sense of perspective.

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Panic on the streets of Google+? Choc Factory hires Digg founder

Tom Maddox
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Childcatcher

When I worked at Be, we had an employee-submitted list of failed slogans for BeOS. The two memorable ones which are apropos of Google+ were:

"BeOS: It sucks less than you might think."

Followed by (as the fate of the company became increasingly apparent):

"It doesn't suck less enough."

G+ definitely sucks less than you might think (far less than, for example, Facebook), just as BeOS sucked less than Windows or MacOS, but it doesn't suck less enough for people to make the move.

Meeeeeemories . . .

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Charge of the Metro brigade: Did Microsoft execs plan to take a hit?

Tom Maddox
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Headmaster

Re: Why?

In fairness to Tzael, it was possible to disable Metro in the Developer Preview with a registry hack, which has now been disabled, so s/he may be operating on outdated information.

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Diablo III out on 15 May, pledges Blizzard

Tom Maddox
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Trollface

Making of . . .

I can only assume that the "Making Of" video is non-stop footage of a bunch of geeks sitting in front of their computers coding away. That should make for some fun viewing at parties: watch your guests suddenly remember important dental or proctology appointments!

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4G hobonet stunt was riddled with flaws, doomed to ridicule

Tom Maddox
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Alert

Re: Silly idea

Badgers.

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Megaupload boss: Site popular among US government users

Tom Maddox
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Holmes

What to do

If only there were some large island nearby that had historically been used to exile criminals, perhaps Mr. Dotcom could be sent there for life and the US could be spared the effort of extradition.

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A sysadmin in telco hell

Tom Maddox
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Joke

Re: Phew! (ahem...)

WHAT?! Since when?

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CIOs on the scrapheap - The Register wants your input for vox pop article

Tom Maddox
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FAIL

Re: What's a CIO?

The feigned ignorance and implied superiority of "what's a . . . ?" decidedly lose their punch these days, as it really implies you are so profoundly stupid and lazy that you can't type it into a search engine.

For example: http://www.lmgtfy.com/?q=cio

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Freedom-crushing govts close to ruling our web, fears FCC boss

Tom Maddox
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FAIL

Re: Did I misread that?

No, they mean the Internet. You see, back in the Dawn of Time . . . no, you know what, go read a book, or even a Wikipedia article. Here's a hint, though: look up ARPAnet.

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